


Battle Scars

by Own_Worst_NME (Kyluxshipismyfav)



Series: Battle Scars [1]
Category: Saturday Night Live Sketches, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Artistic Liberties, Awkward Boners, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Romance, Biting, Blood Kink, Childbirth, Come Eating, Come Swallowing, Cunnilingus, Discussion of Abortion, Disfigurement, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Fluff, Food Sex, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Choking, Force Ghosts, Force Visions, Getting to Know Each Other, Heavy Angst, Heavy Petting, Hurt/Comfort, If only here for Matt the Radar Technician then Chapters 49 and 50 are for you, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Kidnapping, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Lapdance, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, Massage, Masturbation, May/December Relationship, Mentions of Cancer, Misunderstandings, Mother-Son Relationship, Murder, Mutual Masturbation, Older Woman/Younger Man, Oral Sex, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Postpartum Depression, Redemption, Resurrection, Rough Sex, Sexual Harassment, Sexual Roleplay, Simultaneous Orgasm, Soulmates, The Force Ships It, Time Skips, Touch-Starved, Unplanned Pregnancy, Violence, Virgin Ben Solo, scar kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2018-11-29 07:07:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 65
Words: 126,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11435718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyluxshipismyfav/pseuds/Own_Worst_NME
Summary: Kylo has visions of a woman he has never met and she of him.  When they finally meet, it changes them, but what happens to the galaxy?





	1. The One I Envisioned

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been in my head for quite a while and I needed to get it out there. It is my first fic, but I know it won't be my last. It is unbeta'd. All mistakes are my own.

"Fucking scavenger!," Kylo growled as he lays in a pool of his own blood and sweat surrounded by snow. He was waiting for what seemed to be his eminent death as Starkiller base crumbled beneath him. He drifted into a vision of a woman who he had never met, but who he knew from many previous visions…

Her mole dotted olive skin (marred by a scar that ran along her right temple and down her jaw--which Kylo always found himself running his finger gently down), almond eyes, and warm smile always seemed to calm him when she appeared to him at random moments since Ben Solo died. She caressed and kissed his face as though she knew him, …loved him. He always felt unworthy, but he craved her attentions when he was lucky enough to see her. He just hoped that this would not be the last time he would see her as he appeared to be waiting for his end. 

As he laid basking in her imagined warmth, he jumped when he heard Hux bellow his name. He answered and Hux with two rushed stormtroopers came to his aid. He never thought he would be glad to see Hux and he earned more opportunities to see Natalie or Nat as he appeared to like calling her in his visions. Hux and the stormtroopers plopped Kylo down in the shuttle and took off before the planet fell apart. Kylo knew his recovery would take time and Hux was to deliver him to Snoke to continue his training, but he could not help but wonder if he would ever meet his "dream" woman. He was looking forward to it like nothing else in his life.

_________________________________________________________________

Natalie was on her way home from just finishing up her shift as a physician assistant in the ER. Weekends were always the worst because there were so many injuries for her to attend to. She loved her job and was well respected there. Surgery kept trying to recruit her, but she preferred the diversity of patients in the ER. She wasn't a people person per se, but she liked being of service to people in this capacity. 

She got home to an empty house as usual and dropped her things by the door. She stretched a bit and got in the shower to relax after her hard day. She picked over some leftover takeout and brushed her teeth before she settled into a night of TV capped off with some spotty sleep. As she flipped through the channels, she started to visualize her "dream" man, Ben--he was attractive in an unconventional way (she never tended to go for the pretty boys anyway). He had a scar running from his right shoulder to his right eye--she wondered who did the work cause the healing was magnificent and he was damn lucky he didn't lose his eye). She trailed her finger down the scar as she appreciated the constellation on moles on his face and followed that up with light kisses. He had shoulder length wavy black hair (she normally hated long hair on guys, but this suited him and she suspected that he wished to cover his lovably large ears). His nose was large but had a lot of character and she loved it when it touched her face when they kissed. She had been having these visions for years, but never met him. She was definitely crazy!! How could she be in love with someone she had never seen in real life!! She hadn't dated in years since….the night she got her scars. Was she waiting for Ben to consider giving love another chance? What guy would put up with her "extracurricular" nighttime activities? She drifted off for a bit as she always seemed to sleep better after the comforting visions.

__________________________________________________________________

It seemed that in lieu of completing his training, Snoke chose to punish Kylo by sending him to different far off planets to chase after holocrons. Snoke seemed to cool his desire to find the last Jedi and the scavenger for now. He told Kylo these missions were to complete his training but Kylo knew better. The Supreme Leader was still disappointed in him for his efforts at Starkiller even though he did what he asked and killed his father. If Kylo was honest with himself, he felt weaker after Han's death. But the training should make him stronger, right? So here he was on another planet he couldn't give a fuck about looking for another something he couldn't give a shit about. He had searched nearly every corner of this temple and was tempted to just give the fuck up and go the hell back to the Finalizer, but that would just have him running into Hux who would decry another mission without anything to show for it. 

He'd still love to kill that ginger fuck, but now he felt like he owed him a brief reprieve for his efforts in saving him on Starkiller and Snoke would also not allow it. He had gotten to the last area of the temple that he hadn't explored yet. There was light and movement coming from what looked like a portal inside the room. The portal was shimmering and appeared to move like waves in a body of water. This was weird as fuck and not like anything he had seen at any other location. Maybe he should leave and report it to the Supreme Leader, but he may punish him for not investigating it himself further before reporting back. Kylo moved closer to the strange portal, examining it closely. He reached his gloved hand toward it wishing he still had his light sabre, but that was destroyed on Starkiller. He lightly touched the water surface of the portal and drew back to rub his fingers together. This was so weird but he might as well jump in with both feet. He walked into the portal and was drawn in further with each movement. He could see moments in time pass by him and he felt like he was free falling without an end. 

Eventually, he landed in an alley way with no obvious way to return to the temple. He wasn't harmed, but he was disoriented with his surroundings. He got up and started walking to where he could hear some shouting, fighting…… He looked ahead to where the noises were coming from and he could see a woman and a man in a struggle. The woman kicked the man in his abdomen and he groaned in pain, falling to the ground. The woman appeared to be able to handle herself against a man who was a bit larger than herself and Kylo was impressed. As Kylo got closer, the woman was turning toward him and away from her victim. Kylo recognized her, but that was impossible, right? "Nat??, " he questioned. She looked at Kylo and said "Ben??" Just as Natalie was attempting to walk toward Kylo, the man on the ground stabbed at Natalie's back with a knife. She went down to the ground grasping at her wound and Kylo force choked the attacker until he passed out. He went to Natalie, but she was passed out. He tried to access her mind, but was inexplicably unable to. He looked around and was clearly in unfamiliar territory. 

He stared down at her and could see the familiar features of her face. She was bleeding out and he would need her help to get out of this situation. He didn't want to hurt her, but he needed her to wake up so he pressed into her wound hoping that the pain stimulus would arouse her. She startled and opened her eyes and said "It is you, isn't it? Ben." He said "We have to get out of here and I have no idea where we are. I need you to direct me somewhere we can get you some medical attention." She sat up and took off her top shirt to place it on top of her wound to staunch the bleeding then said "My house is some miles away, but we can take an Uber there and I can get my friend to come to my home to patch me up." She took out her phone and used the Uber app to get a ride. They couldn't help but stare at each other and both started storing up questions for the other. Her grounded attacker started to come around and he wanted to kill him, but he didn't wish to scare Natalie away so he threw him back into unconsciousness. Honestly, he wondered if she may have killed the man if he hadn't shown up. They walked to the corner to catch their ride and as they safely got into the car, both patiently awaited the opportunity to answer questions they had pondered for years.


	2. The One I Long For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie gets some medical attention and Kylo gets "comfy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will do my best to update often. Will not abandon this fic, no matter what happens in Episode VIII. All mistakes are my own!!

Kylo and Natalie got out of the car and approached what looked like a large warehouse with multiple floors. Kylo offered "I can carry you in." Natalie replied "No need, I have an elevator." She moved to a panel just inside the entrance and punched in a code. The elevator doors opened and they got inside on their way to the top floor. As usual with elevator rides, the occupants looked at each other awkwardly but with a hint of familiarity that was not so usual. The elevator door finally opened into a large loft area which Kylo assumed was Natalie's home. He immediately felt comfortable, but not without some wariness. Natalie said "Please make yourself at home and I will give you a tour in a bit. I need to make a call." Kylo realized that he never really made himself "at home" anywhere, but he was not opposed to making the effort now. 

____________________________________________________

Natalie left Kylo in the living room and moved to her bedroom to make her call to Twitch. If anyone was her best friend, Twitch was it. She and Twitch had gone to physician assistant school many years ago, but hadn't remained close over the years until she moved to the Seattle area following her rape and subsequent breast cancer battle. She had been well into her vigilante phase as he called it when they happened to meet after her underestimation of a local thug led to her getting hurt and in need of medical attention that she could not go to legitimate lengths to get. She had researched such things and heard about Twitch on the streets. Little did she know that this was the Twitch (as in twink bitch in it's combined form, she was the only one who had called him that and he embraced it as he knew she meant it lovingly) from her school days. When they met as client and "street MD," neither could believe it. They continued to stay in touch as they could use each other as resources as well as friends that were hard to come by in the circles they were traveling in. She left her bedroom and made her way to the defacto doctor's office she maintained in the house for Twitch to do his work in. She got some things ready for him.

_____________________________________________________

Natalie returned to the living room she had left Kylo in and she sat next to him while waiting for Twitch to make his entrance. They stared at each other for about a minute before Natalie spoke. " Thank you for your help out there, Ben." 

"You're welcome. What happened, why were you fighting him? Was he trying to rob you? I got the impression that you could have killed him without my interference. You appear to be a skilled fighter." 

Natalie answered, "Skilled enough, I guess. I should never have turned my back on him. That was sloppy the way I let myself get distracted by you. We, it appears, have a lot to discuss, but it is getting late and I do have a guest coming. I should show you around briefly before he comes." 

Kylo responded, "You should really relax, you just got stabbed!!" 

Natalie replied, "Believe me, I have had worse. I believe the bleeding has stopped and I wouldn't be doing anything strenuous enough to break the clot. Let me show you around." She got up gingerly from the couch and directed Kylo around the loft. She lived alone, but had extra rooms for guests (which she really never got around to having). She showed Kylo a room where he could sleep and clean himself up. She pointed out the kitchen and admitted, " I am a shit cook and I am not ashamed to admit I eat way too much takeout." Kylo smiled at this, but did not judge her for it. He could tell by her body that she was in great shape (muscular legs, toned arms, etc.), but he should probably save this thinking for when he was alone later. He felt a bit ashamed about this while he was in her presence and decided he needed to give her his undivided attention. Natalie angled them toward some stairs and they made their way down to a large gym area that consisted of weights, machines, mats, a music system, and a track. "I try to work out 5 to 6 times a week and I can tell from your form that you probably workout just as much if not more," Natalie offered. She ogled his body briefly and she hoped not too lecherously. She may have bordered on inappropriate and decided that she needed to refocus on their tour. "Feel free to use the gym as you need to, there is room for both of us or we could work out a schedule if you need privacy. We should go back upstairs cause I think Twitch will be here soon, " she said. 

 

________________________________________________________

When they got back upstairs, Kylo said, "Twitch? Who is that?" 

"Twitch is gonna patch me up, read me the riot act for getting hurt, and he may even flirt a little with you. He is harmless and he is a friend. Don't worry.," Natalie reassured him. As they were returning to staring, the elevator bell rung and Twitch walked in with his doctor's bag. Twitch was a natural blonde, but had dyed his hair blue to shock people into knowing he was anything but normal (read boring). He was tall and thin wearing skinny jeans that matched his denim jacket with a plain white tee. His ears were pierced with diamond studs. Quite honestly, he looked out of place with those in the room but he had the type of personality that could take over said room. He looked at Natalie and Kylo and said, " I hope this isn't your idea of a weekend date, love. Who is this tall, dark, and handsome man at your side? He must be at least a friend and not be responsible for your hurt cause I know you would have kicked his ass by now. No offense." Twitch walked toward and offered his hand to Kylo saying "Enchantez." Kylo awkwardly took his hand and shook it, "Nice to meet you." Twitch looked at Natalie and said " We have business in the other room so let's get to it then I can get on with my night and you can get on with yours," leaning his head toward Kylo as he spoke. "Ben, can you please excuse us? Help yourself to whatever you need!, " said Natalie. Kylo relaxed on the couch and tried to rehash how he got here.

____________________________________________________________

When Twitch and Natalie got into the clinic space, she laid on her stomach so Twitch could examine her. Twitch remarked, "So it looks like you have had an eventful night, any sex yet?" Natalie rolled her eyes and said "I'm not a whore, Twitch. I literally just met him. He saved my life actually." Twitch eyed her wound, cleaning it as he measured. He replied, "Relationships have started for less and you are probably the person I know most in need of a great fuck!! He is certainly a good candidate, but if you don't want him, you can feel free to pass him to me!!" Natalie laughed and said "I don't think he's on your team, Twitch, but if that changes, you can count on me to call you up. Besides, " as her face drops, "you know why I can't exactly date anyone." Twitch attempts to comfort her and says, "If you want to be happy, you need love in your life, honey and for God's sake, get your ass off the streets trying to fight these criminals before you get yourself killed!!" She laments "I will know when I need to stop and now is not the time, but at least I have you to look out for me." 

"Honey, I can't fight which is why I have my security team with me at all times and I can't (read won't) warm your bed like that fine piece out there can., " Twitch says. Natalie could feel a headache coming on and she asks, "So what is the damage, Twitch and how long should I be out of commission?" Twitch offers, " I would say at least 2 weeks before anything strenuous that involves your street justice should occur, but if we are talking a gentle horizontal mambo with your house guest then maybe 1 week. I trust you have the pain management taken care of as always." 

"Thank you, Twitch! I trust you have some interesting plans tonight, but forgive me if I say you can tell me about them later. I need to rest right now. Let me walk you to the elevator," she says as Twitch helps her up and they move to exit the clinic door. Kylo is still on the couch and he looks relieved to see Natalie. Natalie walks Twitch to the elevator. As Twitch boards the elevator, he shouts to Kylo, "I trust you will take care with my friend here and have fun while you are doing it!!" 

_______________________________________________________________

Natalie and Kylo were alone again and neither knew quite what to say beyond pleasantries. She thought a bit and said, "I am really tired, but not ready to go to bed yet so I was just gonna watch some TV until I pass out. Is there anything I can get you? " Kylo answered, "No, it has been an interesting day to say the least. Can we talk in the morning? I will go to bed if you don't mind." She breathed a sigh of relief and said, "No, I don't mind. Goodnight." He made his way to the room she offered him earlier and closed the door. She turned on the TV and just stared into the room while thinking of the daunting next day that she hoped would answer long held questions about Ben. 

_________________________________________________________________

 

Kylo settled into the room and got undressed. He needed a shower, not only to get clean but to think on the day's events. The woman he envisioned for so long was in the next room and he was struggling with what to say to her because he thought he would never see this day. As the water runs over his body, he starts to drift into a vision of Natalie. When he was next to her, he felt drawn to kiss and embrace her, but this was not the time. He thought about touching her face, using his tongue to open her mouth to him for further exploration, moving his hand further down her body as she responded with her own ministrations, she brushed her fingertips across his nipples until they peaked and then licked her tongue across them playfully as he moaned, she licked down his chest toward his dick and then wrapped her lips around the head which was leaking with precum, he could see his dick glistening with her saliva mixed with precum as she continued bobbing her head above him….. His hand had moved to his dick almost without notice as he reveled in his thoughts of her and it took nearly no time before his thoughts brought him to orgasm as he imagined her looking up at him while she was giving him head. He felt a brief shock of shame that resolved as he came back to himself and cleaned off before getting out of the shower. She was the only person he had ever masturbated to. He had never kissed or had sex with anyone as the Jedi preached no attachments and Snoke was disgusted by his "adolescent urges" because he felt they were just distractions from his goals in attaining power that Vader would be envious of. No one had even touched Ben Solo since his mother and Kylo Ren could not allow such weakness. He dried himself off and got into bed nude as he had no other clothes. He hoped he could relax and get some uninterrupted sleep tonight so he could be fresh when he spoke with Natalie in the morning, but his sleep was interrupted on most nights with memories of his past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Always looking for ways to improve. Please don't hesitate to comment, especially constructively!!


	3. The One I Want to Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Natalie sleep together and their trust is tested by Kylo's confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the Kylo/Ben thing is confusing, but that should resolve soon. I will try to be better about warning people about smut, but pay attention to the tags please. This chapter and the next will likely be dialogue heavy because they are trying to get to know one another.

Natalie realized Ben would need some clothes as she laid on the couch in front of the TV she was barely paying attention to. She was usually pretty good at sizing people up, but she figured Twitch probably be better in this instance. She texted Twitch, not expecting an answer back right away this late, so he could find Ben some clothes and maybe have one of his minions drop them off in the morning. 

She vacillated between eagerly anticipating and dreading their talk in the morning. She was going to have to tell Ben about her horrible past and how it led to her current exploits. She wasn't sure how harshly he might judge her, but she tried to be rigorous with her honesty in most reasonable situations. She really hoped that Ben could become someone that she could trust and she wanted to be that for him as well. The chemistry, for lack of a better term, between them was palpable. She had never experienced anything like that with anyone before, but it didn't mean that things would go smoothly because of this odd attraction. 

She took a couple Percocets to help with her pain and they usually made her sleep, but she was just so wired due to the events of earlier tonight. She was about to close her eyes and drift off when she heard a noise coming from Ben's room. She thought she might be imagining it when it happened again. She eased herself off the couch and walked toward his room. She opened the door and heard him screaming unintelligibly as he tossed and turned in the bed. Natalie went over to him and touched him gently to stir him awake. She knelt next to the bed and got closer to shake him awake. "Ben, you're safe, wake up, " she said as she stroked his face. He startled and opened his eyes, but he seemed glad to see her. She smiled at him and realized that Ben was naked in bed. She quickly put that thought away and asked if he needed anything. Kylo said, "I'm fine now, thank you for waking me. This happens to me sometimes." 

"I am arranging for some clothes to be brought by for you in the morning. Would you feel better if we stayed in the same bed together? I will keep my clothes on, of course, but you seem to need the company and I probably do too after the night we've had," said Natalie. Kylo replied, "We just met but it feels like we know each other so I wouldn't mind sharing the bed, it is big enough for both of us!!" Natalie relaxed and said, "OK, I will stay on top of the covers so I can be here if you need me. You're not cold, are you?" 

"No, I'm fine, thank you, " Kylo answered. Natalie went to get a blanket and returned to the bed with Ben so they could both try to sleep. 

____________________________________________________________

 

Natalie awoke feeling rested. Ben was still in bed next to her and it looked like he was getting some restful sleep. She got up and planned to make breakfast. Breakfast she could handle because she didn't have to make much from scratch. She got into the kitchen and pulled some foods from the refrigerator as well as some pans to cook with. She had closed the bedroom door so Ben could continue to sleep for a while longer. Her phone buzzed and Twitch had texted her that someone would be bringing some clothes by for her "lover boy." It made her smile, but she couldn't help but worry now about Ben waking up to breakfast and interesting conversation. 

Kylo stirred in bed and smelled the breakfast cooking. He was starved after last night's craziness. He also realized that he only had his robes to wear. Just then, he got out of bed and turned to the dresser on to which some clothes had been laid out for him. They actually looked like they could fit his frame. He got in the shower and cleaned himself up. It seemed like a dream that he was here and about to have a meal with the woman of his dreams. He could only hope that she could be open to him after he shared things about himself that could make her ashamed to know him. Would she kick him out into a world that he knows nothing about? Would he be able to get back to Snoke and his destiny or did he even want to go back? He decided that he should just get this over with so his and Natalie's questions would be answered. 

_____________________________________________________________

Natalie said, "Good Morning," as she saw Ben exit the bedroom. He replied with the same and he couldn't help but smile at her. "Help yourself to what you want. I made a ton cause I figured you'd be hungry. There's juice and coffee and I can make some tea if you want, but I'd just have to boil some water," said Natalie. Ben answered, "Please, just grab some food for yourself and sit. You don't need to serve me." They both sat down with their food and drinks and stared at each other. Before it could get any more awkward, Natalie said, " So I will start first, but that doesn't mean you're off the hook. The reason I know who you are is because I have been dreaming or having visions of you off and on most of my life." Kylo felt relieved when she said it first because now it didn't seem so crazy. He answered "Me too. Were we lovers in your visions and dreams as we were in mine?" Natalie nodded yes and said, "How is this possible?" Kylo replied, "I believe the Force brought us together." 

"What is the Force, Ben?" Kylo felt at ease when she called him Ben because that is what she had always done, but to anyone else he would say that Ben Solo was dead. "The Force is energy that connects all living things and I am someone who is able to access the Force and wield it with the power of my will.," Kylo explained. He knew that trying to explain midichlorians was going to be a waste of time and it tended to confuse people. "What do you use the Force to do, Ben?," Natalie asked. Kylo supplied, "I can move things, stop blaster bolts, freeze people, choke people, and read minds. The strange thing is when I first met you, I tried to access your mind, but I couldn't and I still can't." "Has that ever happened to you before, Ben?," Natalie asked. Kylo replied, "No, I am usually able to access projections from anyone even if I can't read a person's thoughts, but I get nothing from you at all." "What does it mean, Ben?, " she asked. "I wish I knew, but I could probably access your mind if you open it to me.," Kylo pondered. 

Natalie had to admit that the thought of doing this made her feel a little, no a lot uncomfortable. " I think we should leave that for another time," she said. Kylo was a bit disappointed, but could not blame her at this point. "I should probably tell you why I was in the alley with piece of shit that stabbed me in the back. He's a pimp that likes to beat up his girls, so I wanted to teach him a lesson. It's something I do in my spare time. I look out for people that can't protect themselves. I have some personal reasons for doing it that I hope I can share with you at a later time because it is difficult to discuss. It probably sounds reckless, but it is something that I need to do." Kylo offered, "I saw your moves and I was impressed. I'd love to spar with you sometime. " Natalie smiled, "I'm sure we could make that happen. Is your physical training tied to your use of the Force?" Kylo was starting to get uncomfortable here because he was going to have to tell Natalie some horrible things about himself. "Yes, physical fitness is important in order to better connect with the Force as well as the forms that are used in fighting." 

"Who are you fighting, Ben?" "I fight enemies of the First Order and other Force users." "So you are in the military, Ben?" "Not in the military, but I work for Supreme Leader Snoke using the dark side of the Force to support the First Order's military." "The Force has sides, like what good and evil, Ben?" Kylo balked, "I use the dark side to obtain power and sometimes I have to do things that I am not proud of. I hoped that the power would make those things worth it." "What is the worst thing you have done in the pursuit of this power, Ben? " Kylo was ashamed to admit this and he was thrown back to that horrible moment on that bridge, "I killed my father because the Supreme Leader asked it of me and no, it wasn't worth it. I regretted it the moment it happened." Natalie was in shock that Ben had told her this, she put her hand to her mouth and wanted to cry but she took a moment before she spoke, "I am glad that you told me, but I need some time to process this. I think now is a good time to take a break in this conversation, leave it for later. I am a little tired and I just need some time." Kylo understood what she was saying, but he wondered if he ruined their relationship before it even got started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I anxiously anticipate feedback and constructive criticism from you all!!


	4. The One I Can Talk To

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben patches Natalie up and Natalie opens up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No smut yet, still getting to know each other. Should not be too much longer though for those in a hurry to have them get to it. WIll try to update frequently.

After their somewhat disastrous attempt at introductory conversation, Ben headed down to the gym and Natalie proceeded to clean up their breakfast leftovers. She mulled over what Ben had admitted to and she had been shocked. When she thought about it, she realized that she was really in no position to judge him. They had really only known each other for less than 24 hours even though they had crazily dreamed of each other for years. She needed to apologize to him and give him time to explain further. This situation was starting to become a bit overwhelming, but she was good at dealing with adversity. She decided to go take some easy laps around the track and listen to some music to relax a bit and then she would approach Ben later.

____________________________________________________

Ben was well into his workout, but he was distracted with what had just happened at breakfast. He wasn't sure if he was being rejected completely, but he realized that he basically told a mostly complete stranger that the Force meant for them to be together and that he was a homicidal maniac. He wanted it to have gone differently, but he also wanted to be honest so that things could hopefully have a better chance of working out. Just then, he heard the upstairs door open and Natalie came into the gym. She looked at him and nodded before starting her walk around the track. At least she could still stand to look him in the eye.

Natalie put in her ear buds and started to play her music while making her way around the track gingerly so as not to aggravate her back wound. Usually, she belted out songs while she was working out, but she didn't want to disturb Ben so she hummed to herself instead. She slowly increased her pace with each lap. 

Ben was even more distracted when Natalie came down to work out. His eyes followed her at different intervals around the track. He felt a distance between them that seemed to surpass what it was in actuality even though they were in the same room. He wished to be closer to her, but he couldn't understand why her mind was closed to him. Maybe he was meant to work harder for this relationship rather than continue his dependence on the Force for every interaction with another person. At this point, he stopped having any momentum with his workout. He was going to head upstairs to shower and change, but when he searched for Natalie, he noticed some bleeding coming from her back wound and he ran toward her.

Natalie was immersed in her music and her walk/run when Ben ran over to her and turned her around. "Your back is bleeding, Nat!!" She started to feel slightly lightheaded and Ben seemed to know that he should pick her up in his arms. She didn't pass out once he picked her up and she directed, "Please take me upstairs to the clinic so I can get your help with this." He quickly obliged and helped her to arrange herself on the table. "I was gonna ask you to help me with this later since I can't see what is going on with this thing. Thank you.," she said. He offered, "It's no problem, but you should probably take it easy for a little while longer until this heals." She pointed out the supplies to him and he gathered them up to clean then patch the wound. She scooted up to lift her shirt to make things easier for him and Ben turned around to see her badly scarred back. He was a bit shocked and wanted to ask what happened, but he thought he should leave this for another time. He took the antiseptic and quickly cleaned her wound and observed for any continued bleeding. Then he covered the wound with a clean dressing. He helped her up from the table and she again thanked him. 

She made her way to the couch in the living room and Ben sat next to her. "Are you feeling alright, should I call your friend from last night to check on you?," Ben said. "I'm ok, you're right that I am probably overdoing things. I wanted to apologize to you, Ben." 

"For what?," Ben questioned

"We don't know really know each other and you shared something very personal with me. I appreciate it and I could have been more open about myself but I don't tend to open myself up to very many people. I am still trying to wrap my head around this whole situation."

"I understand. I don't have people in my life that I can trust, any friends. I would like it if we could at least be friends, Nat. " He said this knowing that he hoped for so much more, but he would take what he could get from her at this point.

"I would like to be friends, Ben. Twitch is the only male friend I have and you heard that he was trying to urge me to look for something more with someone.," She wondered if this was the right time for such an admission, but she thought it could be appropriate with the weight of what Ben had admitted earlier. "I haven't dated or been with anyone in a long time. I'm sure you noticed the scars on my back and of course the one on my face.," She struggled with this admission and Ben was struggling because he knew he might not be able to comfort her. "I was…., " she paused. Ben said, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to or if you're not ready." He looked at her and offered his hand tentatively because he wasn't sure she would take it. She looked at his hand and reached out to take it. It felt so warm and comforting, she wanted to cry, to let him pull her into his arms and tell her it would be alright. "About 2 years after I got divorced, I was raped by someone that I thought I knew. It turned out he was just a predator and I was one of his victims. He tortured me for what seemed like forever and then he got to my face….He ran the knife down from my temple to my jaw and then he got distracted. I wriggled out of the ropes and got away. I think if I would have stayed, he would have torn my face off and killed me." Ben didn't know what to say, but he tried to be reactive to her needs. "I felt ashamed and I …never told anyone until Twitch and now you. I didn't go to the hospital for treatment and I just treated myself as best I could so everything just healed badly. I was lucky not to get any infections. I told everyone I had a car accident and they believed me. Not long after that, I got diagnosed with breast cancer and opted for surgery rather than a long process of chemo or radiation. I thought I was going crazy and I needed to break away so I moved out here to try to restart my life. And………….I realize I am babbling but I feel like I just unloaded a big weight off myself. Have I scared you off yet, Ben??""

Ben took all this in and he immediately said, "No, I don't think you could ever scare me off, Nat. I am sorry all that happened to you and I wish there was something more I could do to comfort you." Natalie said, "You're doing it by being my friend, Ben. I want to be a better friend to you. " 

"I'm not sure you will want to be friends with me once you know all my dirty little secrets, Nat."

"I am willing to keep an open mind, Ben, as long as you can do the same."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Constructive criticism is appreciated. How else will I get better??


	5. The One I Can't Resist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie talk more and things start to heat up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little smut should be coming soon, but not too much. For now, they are still trying to get to know each other but they will be more connected.

Natalie and Ben talked for hours and it was like they were old friends, but they were divulging their life stories to each other. They discussed their childhoods and family ties. Ben was so unhappy as a child because his parents seemed to never have time for him and they shipped him off to his uncle when they couldn't deal with him anymore which seemed to make things worse for their relationships, not to mention Snoke's "involvement" with Ben behind the scenes. Natalie had actually been married to her husband for about 15 years before they divorced due to his cheating and they had a daughter who made her a grandmother when she had her own child. Both Ben and Natalie were surprised to discover each other's ages, Ben was 30 and Natalie was 42. Natalie worked in the ER providing medical care to random patients in need. Their life experiences were totally different, but somehow they were brought together after years of knowing of each other. Things became slightly more interesting when Ben mentioned being on the Finalizer.

"Wait a minute, you as Kylo Ren were on a spaceship working with Supreme Leader Snoke, Hux, Phasma, and the rest of the First Order?," Natalie questioned. "I think I must have missed something in our conversation. Where did you come from exactly and how did you get here?"

"The year from which I came was 34 ABY and I came through a portal in a temple which Snoke sent me to looking for ancient caches of information or holocrons," Ben replied knowing that this would sound fantastical to Natalie. 

"So you’re a spaceman who can control things with your mind who traveled across galaxies and an unknown amount of time to meet someone you have been seeing in your head forever?? Will you be able to ever go back?, " Natalie said barely believing what she heard and said. 

Ben took a moment before he answered, "I don't know if I can or want to go back there. There is nothing much left for me there. That's why I know the Force brought me here to meet you."

"Ben, I have a science background so I can definitely keep an open mind , but all this is starting to give me a headache! Are you hungry cause I'm starving? It is late so maybe I should warm up some of our breakfast leftovers. Is that ok?"

He agreed. She went to the fridge and pulled out the leftover food and started to warm it up. It wasn't lost on either of them how they were again sharing a meal, but now the tone of their conversation had changed and they could continue talking without worry about the other person's discomfort.

"So it wasn't strange for you to be in 2017 with the changes in technology, languages…," Natalie asked. 

"Not really, I was still connected to the Force so I could figure everything else out just fine. And I felt better when I saw you because that meant that Force put me where I needed to be" Ben supplied.

"You rely on the Force a lot. Have you ever been without it, could you ever be without it?," Natalie asked.

"I have been able to access the Force for as long as I can remember and I have never been without it so I don't know how that feels. But you are the first person whose mind I have not been able to touch or even pick up projections from and I don't know what that means. I can see how the Force moves around you and it's very bright. It….attracts me to you like a gravitational pull…," Ben trails off when he realizes that he's probably coming off as weird. 

Natalie blushes at this. " I am….attracted to you like I have never been to anyone and I can't believe I just said that but it is true. I know I can say it to you and not be embarrassed, but this is scary for me because there is so much I don't know and a lot that I do know now. Does all this mean that we are supposed to be together?"

Ben felt somewhat emboldened, "Yes, I believe it means that we mean a lot to each other and that we should try to be together. But I also know what you've been through and that it means you would like to take things slow and I am all for that. Take as long as you need and I will still be here. I have no experience with women whatsoever other than the dreams I have had of you, so you are the only woman I have ever wanted. I dare say that you are the only woman I will ever want."

Natalie stared at him and saw his sincerity. She got up from her seat and went over to him. She sat on his lap as if she was comfortable there, stroked the scarred side of his face gently as his body softened, and she placed her lips to his giving him a chaste kiss. Ben brought his hands to her face and rested his forehead on hers. They both sat quietly and wondered what the rest of the night held for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to leave comments, I will answer all of them and will take all constructive criticism seriously!!


	6. The One I Crave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie get intimate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally a little smut to whet your whistle, there will be more to come later

Still in Ben's lap, Natalie came to a realization and said, "I am reminded that we both worked out earlier and we both could probably stand to shower. Ben replies, "I don't mind if you don't." He really didn't. She smelled of a very faint air of sweat and mostly vanilla. He could also imagine that her skin would taste of the same.

Natalie declared, "I don't mind, in fact, it adds to your charm." She leaned in toward his lips and kissed him again with more intent. Ben responded with equal intent. "How is it that you never dated or kissed anyone? You are very attractive, is there a different standard of beauty where you're from?"

Ben never thought of himself as attractive due to his large ears, large nose, crooked grin, and his misshapen face. "Honestly, I was never interested in anyone and I think I might have saved myself for you as crazy as that sounds. I'm not sure I would have even known if anyone did show interest in me." 

Natalie proceeded to highlight what she found attractive about him followed by confirmatory kisses and caresses. "I'm flattered that you saved your ears, nose, and pouty mouth for me. And the scar just makes your young face a little more rugged. Makes me feel less like an old woman robbing the cradle."

Ben couldn't let Natalie downgrade herself. "You are not old, you're probably one of the most youthful women I have ever met. And if I am being honest, your scars make you even more attractive to me. Is that wrong?"

"No, not at all. The scars for both of us show our life experiences and neither one of us had anything to do with how the scars came to be. I think you're allowed to be attracted to what you want as long as no one is hurt.," Natalie replied. "At the risk of sounding inappropriate and because I'm a medical professional, we need to talk about some things. I am clean of any sexually transmitted diseases and I believe you when you say you have been with no one which means you are clean. As far as birth control, I had early menopause years ago so I can't get pregnant. Now that those things are out of the way, I'd really like to kiss you some more and maybe go a little further. Are you agreeable, Ben?"

Ben gulped and nodded nervously. He didn't mind letting her take the lead since he didn't know what he was doing anyway. Natalie worried, "Am I moving to fast for you?" Ben answered "I will go as fast or as slow as you like, Nat. I… want to be with you in anyway you allow." Natalie got up from Ben's lap and led him to the living room couch. He sat in the middle of the couch and she straddled him. "It's ok if you're scared, Ben.," Natalie said. Ben answered, " I just don't want to mess this up. I want to be good for you." "You could never be bad, just the fact that you're here is everything.," Natalie replies.

Natalie kisses Ben softly and gently opens his mouth with her tongue as both of them moan with satisfaction. She cards her hand through Ben's hair and he reaches up to the back of her neck to gently caress her curly mane. Ben darts his tongue into Natalie's mouth tenderly then moves a hand to her low back with fingers grasping her bottom. They grind against each other slowly. Ben is worried he might come just from this, but Natalie reaches down to stroke him through his pants. Ben moans and relaxes his head against the back of the couch. Natalie says breathlessly, "Can I touch you?" Ben nods yes and Natalie unzips his pants to find his large swollen dick leaking with precum. Ben's senses are on overload. He was never sure he would ever meet Natalie, let alone have her touching him like this. She continues to kiss him passionately while she strokes his cock slowly. He fucks in her hand and softly says, "Please!" when her mouth pulls away from his during their fevered kissing. "Please what, Ben? Tell me!!" 

"Please don't stop, I need you so much!!, " Ben cries and he comes explosively after two more pumps in to Natalie's hand. Natalie peppers kisses to his nose, lips, and neck and then rests her forehead against Ben's as he comes down from his orgasm. Ben speaks after a minute and says, "I want to make you come too, will you let me?" "Not now, I am ok. Why don't we both get cleaned up and we'll meet in your bed, alright?," Natalie said. They separated and made their way to their respective bathrooms, both pondering the intensity of what just occurred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need your input, so please leave me a comment!! I promise I am with this fic to the end!!


	7. The One I Want to Please

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More intimacy for Natalie and Ben

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little more smut and more getting to know you dialogue.

Natalie got into her bathroom and started the water in the shower. She stood in front of the mirror staring at herself and ran her hands through her hair a few times. Was she really doing this? Starting a relationship with a man she barely knew for a day. It felt so right!! If this was just sexual, she could have had meaningless contact like that with many men she had come across since her rape. Ben was different though, wasn't he? Of course, she was sexually attracted to him, but there was something deeper, more important in their connection. The bathroom started to steam up, so she got into the shower to wash her doubt away.

_______________________________________________

Ben was still reeling from being with Natalie on the living room couch. He could still smell her scent on him and he was tempted not to wash it away, but he knew they would be together again soon. He got into the shower and flashed back to Natalie jerking him off. He was playing back her moaning in his head, he loved that sound and was becoming addicted to it, wanted to hear it more and more. He wondered why she wouldn't let him pleasure her as well. Did she think he wouldn't be able to make her happy because of his lack of experience? He could be a good student if she wanted to lead in these matters. Maybe he was overthinking it. He finished up his shower, got out, and grabbed a towel to dry off with. He was anxious to see Natalie again. 

_______________________________________________

 

Ben was waiting on the bed when Natalie came back to his bedroom. They both smiled at each other. She was wearing some shorts and a tank top that showed off her body, but he needed to calm himself. Maybe she just wanted to talk and then sleep. He was open to whatever she wanted and was just happy to be in her presence. Natalie crawled on the bed toward Ben and kissed him softly. "Did you miss me, Ben?" "Yes, I did, but I knew I would see you again soon." 

Natalie settled in the bed next to Ben and turned to her side toward him. He mirrored her and tentatively reached a hand to stroke her face. She turned into his hand slightly and kissed his palm. "Can we talk a little?," Natalie said. Ben nodded and wasn't sure if he could hide his disappointment. Natalie laid her head on Ben's chest and he draped an arm across her. "When we were together earlier, you said you needed me. Was that true or was it just something you said in the heat of the moment?," Natalie asked.

"I said it in the heat of the moment, but I meant it. I have always needed you, Nat. You have comforted me through some dark times when I only could see you in my dreams or visions. You.. have been my only comfort and now you are my reality. I need you in my life in whatever way you allow me to be."

Natalie's heart swelled as she reached out to touch Ben's face, "Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are, Ben? I don't just mean physically, there's something amazing that just emanates from you. I think you needed to be reminded of that, but Snoke played on your youthful insecurities and abused you. He stole from you and anybody that knew you, anybody that could have loved you for what you were. " She kissed Ben and wiped away a single tear that fell from his eye. 

Ben hugged her tightly in his arms, careful not to hurt her. "What can I do to make you happy, Nat? I want to give you pleasure like you did for me. I know my experience is limited, but I can follow directions." He let her go so he could look her in the eyes. 

"How did I get so lucky?," Natalie said. "I am gonna show you how to get me off, but it's different for me than it is for you. Women can have multiple orgasms in short succession, but it usually takes men a while to have an erection after they orgasm. If you want to mark me, nothing above the collarbone. Before we take all the romance out of this, kiss me!!" Ben obliged her with a warm passionate kiss.

They plunged their tongues into each other's mouths and ran their hands over each other's bodies. Ben did want to mark her, but he would follow her instructions. He tongued at her earlobe before a gentle bite and proceeded to do the same to her jaw, neck, and collarbone. Each stop elicited a moan, but the stop at her neck was loudest. He returned to her neck to lick and gently nip there careful not to bruise her. She really liked this and he liked that she liked it so he continued. She took his hand in hers and drew it down to her crotch. She took his index finger and placed it on her clit. She showed him how to drag his finger across it back and forth. She widened her legs and grabbed his face so she could kiss him deeply while he stroked her clit. Ben enjoyed the noises she was making, but he had an instinct and just went for it. He moved his head down to where his finger had been and he started making the same motion with his tongue. Natalie startled, but Ben sensed she was enjoying it. He took in the taste of her and he reveled in it. Natalie grabbed his hair and moaned a little louder. He varied the rhythm of his tongue movements and the placement of the flat or tip of his tongue as he got a little more confident. Natalie reached her orgasm and pulled Ben toward her to signal him to stop his ministrations for now. 

"Where did you learn that, Ben?," as her breathing normalized she kissed Ben deeply before giving him a chance to answer. "I wanted to taste you and I thought that was my chance to do it and make you come at the same time. Was it good for you?," Ben asked. "Fuck yes," she said. "I wouldn't mind you doing it a couple more times. You're a quick study, baby!" Ben moved his head back down to her crotch to start his work again and it was about a minute or so before she came again. She pulled him back up for a bit and they started the process again. When Ben came back up, he plunged his tongue in to Natalie's mouth again. They explored each other's mouth for a bit. Natalie started to stroke Ben off through his clothes and he moaned. "Can I put my mouth on you now?," Natalie asked. Ben nodded yes. 

Natalie gently pulled out Ben's cock from his pants. She stroked him a few times then placed her mouth on the tip and licked at the leaking precum. Ben moaned as he watched this. She proceeded to take him into her mouth further and saliva mixed with precum ran down his cock. She stroked him from the base gently. She bobbed her head over his cock and she took more and more into her mouth. She guided Ben's hand to her hair so he could maneuver her as he liked. His moans were getting louder as her rhythm got faster. He came into her mouth with a shout and she took all of it in. She re-positioned herself so she could kiss Ben and let him taste himself on her lips and tongue. They kissed for a few more minutes and Natalie asked Ben, "Was that to your liking?" Ben replied, "That was amazing, I'm glad I waited so it could happen with you." They stared into each other's eyes for a moment and Natalie suggested, "Let's brush our teeth and turn into for the night. Is that OK?' Ben agreed and they again went to their respective bathrooms before getting back in bed together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need comments please so I can improve at writing and improve the reader experience!!


	8. The One I Can't Let Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie go all the way!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More smut for your reading pleasure!

Ben and Natalie came back to his bed and Natalie kissed him goodnight before falling asleep. Ben laid there looking at Natalie and going over the last few days in his mind. He would touch her, but he didn't want to risk waking her and she probably needed some rest. Instead, he just admired different spots of her exposed skin. He noticed a heart shaped birthmark on her right forearm. She had lots of moles about her body, but he ogled a constellation of two brown moles and a nevus on her right bicep that you could draw imaginary lines to form a triangle. He could tell by looking at her fingernails that she bit them just like he did. She snored just softly enough so that he heard it, but it was nothing like he was sure he sounded like. 

He already knew that he was in love with her and that he could never leave her willingly. He couldn't be sure how she felt and he wouldn't push the issue either. He would accept whatever role she let him have in her life, but however small the role, he would always want more. She seemed so peaceful that it was slowly lulling him to sleep as well.

______________________________________________________

Natalie woke up in the middle of the night and Ben was sound asleep. She didn't want to wake him so she stayed quiet. He was snoring loudly, but she wasn't annoyed by it. He probably had a deviated septum from having his nose busted one too many times, but she wouldn't want him to fix it. He had a great set of pectoral muscles on him, his tits were way bigger than her nonexistent ones. His abs were phenomenal and he clearly had worked on them quite a bit. He had a ton of moles like she did. His left ear peaked out of his dark wavy hair and she felt the urge to caress it, but she resisted. 

She was in love with him, but that was ridiculous and she blamed it on the circumstances of their meeting and the time in her life when they met. There was no way he felt the same. He could decide he wants to try to go back to his time someday and she would be devastated, but she would help him if he needed it. Still feeling tired, she eventually drifted back to sleep. 

_______________________________________________________

The sun started to peak in the blinds and they both slowly stirred awake. They were facing each other when their eyes opened. "Good morning," Natalie breathed and Ben sleepily responded with the same. They stared at each other longingly and eventually both leaned in to kiss. It was tentative at first, but became more demanding. Natalie moved her arms around Ben's neck and Ben's arms moved around her waist. Natalie wrapped her legs around Ben's waist and he rolled on top of her. She could feel his erection against her. She gently pulled away from their kiss to look in Ben's soulful eyes. "Are you sure you want to do this, Ben? It's going to change everything for us.," Natalie said. 

Ben looked deeply into her eyes and caressed her face with his large hand. "I want things to change between us, but only if you are comfortable with it. If it's too fast, we can slow down. I am OK with it, really." 

Natalie thought for a moment and responded, "I don't need to go slow. I already know… that I love you." She searched Ben's eyes for the answer to an unspoken question.

Ben's eyes started to water, but no tears fell. He kissed her gently and said, "I love you, too. I want to do everything I can to make you happy, I want to give you everything, all of me."

Natalie kissed him back and said, "You can have all of me, now." She gently thrust her tongue at his lips to beg entrance to his mouth and he met her with his tongue. They moaned into each other's mouths softly. Ben moved his hands to Natalie's backside to caress it and remove her shorts. Natalie moved her hands to caress Ben's backside and remove his shorts. When they were both bottomless, Ben then went to take off Natalie's shirt. He saw her mastectomy scars and placed his mouth on them gently. He ran his tongue along them and Natalie moaned at the sensitivity he had elicited with his actions. He stroked the scar along the right side of her face and ran butterfly kisses along it. He then turned his attention to her horribly scarred back. He ran both hands along her back and then again followed that with butterfly kisses. Natalie moaned again at his actions, but missed looking at him so she turned around to put him on his back. She started with the scar that marred his face and shoulder. She stroked it gently then licked it from his face to his shoulder eliciting a soft moan from Ben. She visited his nipples and playfully licked and sucked them causing Ben to arch his back slightly. Natalie moved her way down to the Bowcaster scar on his abdomen. She stroked it and licked it at every edge. Ben was so hard now that precum was leaking all over his abdomen. Natalie licked the head of his cock and slurped up the precum. She moved down his penis to lick him from the frenulum back to the head again and Ben moaned "Please, Nat." "Be patient, baby. I'll make it good for you." She returned to sucking the head of his cock, but she move a hand to the base of his cock and the other to his balls so she could stroke them. She started bobbing her head and sucking him more deeply into her mouth. Ben got louder and started to fuck her mouth gently as he grasped her hair. After a few more pumps, Ben emptied himself into Natalie's mouth. 

Natalie swallowed all he gave her and moved to kiss him. "I love the sounds you make, baby.," Natalie says. Ben replied, "I want to make you come so hard, make you scream for me." He moved between Natalie's legs and started to lap at her clit. He started slow and gradually increased his rhythm. He used the flat of his tongue at first and then went to the tip of his tongue when was going faster. Natalie moved her hands to his hair and moaned loudly. About a minute went by and her moan changed pitch when she finally came. Ben moved on top of her and kissed her so she could taste herself on his lips. 

"I want to be inside you so badly, Nat. Are you ready for me?" Natalie responded breathily, "Yes, but let me ride you, OK?" Ben nodded and tried to be patient. He sat down on the bed and waited for Natalie to mount him. She crouched over his legs and eased herself down onto his dick. Ben gasped with the new sensation he was feeling. When Natalie was fully seated on Ben's cock, she moaned "You're so big, you're filling me up, baby." Ben's hands moved to Natalie's hips and she started to move. She rolled her hips as Ben fucked into her. She reached slightly behind her to play with his balls and he moaned loudly. They were in rhythm together and the rhythm picked up as they went. He could feel Natalie's vaginal muscles clench around him and it felt so good. "I'm gonna come, Nat!" "It's OK, baby, me too." They both screamed as they came together. Natalie laid on Ben's chest with his cock still inside her and they were both breathless. They kissed and Natalie breathed, "You're still hard!" Ben smiled at her and they knew they should prepare for a few more rounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would appreciate any feedback that you guys can give. Thanks for reading!!


	9. The One I Want To Be With

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie talk about the future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little more smut and some future talk

Ben was thrusting in to Natalie and ramping up his rhythm as she clenched around him. Natalie ran her fingers down Ben's back to his buttocks and held on tight. He thrusted a few more times before they both loudly moaned as they came together. While they were coming down and breathing heavily, Ben noticed beads of sweat on Natalie's chest and neck and he proceeded to lick up the sweat. Then he found his way to her mouth and licked it open to further explore. They indulged in the kiss for a minute before pulling away. "I love the way you smell and the way you taste.," Ben said. 

"Oh my god, Ben, how can you still be hard? We've been at this for hours! Did Twitch slip you some blue pills into your clothes? Baby, I love you, but we have to take a break now. I have to see if my legs still work and I need to pee so I can avoid a bitch of a bladder infection.," Natalie said. 

Ben replied, "I will carry you if you can't walk. I am getting a bit hungry so now is a good time to take a break." 

"I'd suggest that we take a shower together cause we reek of sex and sweat, but we would probably just start fucking again!," Natalie opined. 

"I can't help it if I can't control myself around you, Nat. You're so irresistible," Ben said as he started to lick and place soft kisses at Natalie's jaw line. 

"Oh no, break time. You are going to fuck me into an early grave, but I can't deny I would enjoy it immensely," Natalie said as she kissed him on his nose and made an attempt to get up. They had taken each other on most of the free surfaces in the house: the couch, one of the weight benches in the gym, one of the mats in the gym, the washing machine on spin cycle, etc. Natalie did finally get up and Ben made sure she was steady enough to walk on her own. She made a beeline for the bathroom and so did he. She peed, showered, and brushed her teeth before coming out to the living room to find Ben waiting for her after he did the same. They talked about what food they should order for late lunch/early dinner and turned on the TV until their food came.

"So your first time was not so bad?," Natalie queried. Ben pulled Natalie to him, kissed her slowly, and answered, "Not bad at all and neither were the other times after that." 

"I'm glad. Not everyone is lucky enough to have a good experience their first time and also have it be with someone they love.," Natalie said. "I wish I could say it would always be like this, but it won't be. That's just the nature of relationships. There's a lot of sex at the beginning, then life gets in the way. Just promise me that if you start to lose your attraction for me that you will talk to me. That is how things went bad in my marriage and my husband started cheating on me. I didn't find out for years what was happening. I don't want that for us."

Ben pulled Natalie's face toward his, looked into her eyes and said, "I don't want anyone else but you. There is no one else for me. I am in this with you until the end, whenever that is. I will want you when your hair turns gray, your skin wrinkles, you lose your teeth, and you can't get out of bed without help. I would still be here with you even if we didn't just christen nearly every open space in your house. I want whatever I can have from you, Nat. I meant that." He drew her into a kiss and caressed her face. 

Natalie couldn't believe this was where they were in a relationship after only knowing each other for so little time. "People always say things like that, but it doesn't mean that things won't change even if you don't want them too. I do believe that is how you feel and how I feel right now. I will always be open and honest with you as long as you can do the same with me."

"I promise I will do that," Ben said. " We should probably check your back wound out and change the bandage." They made their way to the clinic and Natalie laid on her stomach on the table after changing the paper roll cause that was one of the free spaces they had used earlier. Ben got out the supplies and looked at the wound before cleansing it and reapplying a clean bandage. He helped her up from the table and they heard the intercom go off. Natalie went down to pay for the food and bring it up while Ben hung out on the couch. 

Natalie came back up in a few minutes with the food and brought plates and forks over to the couch. They had gotten pretty comfortable with one another: they shared food and fed each other and kissed and/or licked off left over dribbles of sauce from each other's faces. They cleaned up and laid in each other's arms in front of the TV. Ben placed soft kisses on Natalie's face and rubbed her back. Natalie did the same. They had become quite domestic and it wasn't a problem. It had been a long languid day of fucking and they were pretty tired. They decided to turn in for the night even though it was still early. When their energy returned, there were still more places in Natalie's house that were left to christen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am enjoying writing this and I hope you guys enjoy reading it. Please let me know what you guys think!!


	10. The One No One Could Find

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We take a break from our lovers to visit the First Order, the Resistance, and Luke and Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No smut this chapter, but more is on the way soon.

Phasma came to General Hux's office after sending a com to him regarding an urgent matter she wanted to discuss with him. She alerted him to her presence and he said to enter. She closed the door behind her and he offered her a seat. "What is the urgent matter you wished to discuss with me, Captain?"

"Sir, did you realize that Kylo Ren has not checked back in with us in 2 weeks after being sent on a mission that we were told would only take 3 days at the most?"

"Of course, I realized this, Captain. We are essentially on high alert, so I thought maybe the Supreme Leader diverted him on another mission after this one."

"Sir, don't you feel it is odd you were not made aware of this additional mission if that is indeed what it is? And what if there is no other mission, should we be worried about Ren's safety especially after Starkiller?"

"Captain, I appreciate you coming to me with your concerns, but may you be worrying about things way above your pay grade?"

"Can we talk off the record for a moment, sir?"

"Of course, Phasma."

"I think we all have things we should be worried about after Starkiller. Mistakes were made, but I am confident that those shortcomings can be overcome and I worry about how Supreme Leader Snoke will see things going forward. All of our heads are on the block and I wish for us all to be positioned in the best light. How is it that we weren't updated on Ren's status and does that mean that we have lost the Supreme Leader's favor in some way other than the obvious? I can't imagine that these things have not occurred to you."

"Rest assured, Phasma. I have planned for every possible outcome following our…defeat at Starkiller. I will speak with the Supreme Leader regarding Ren, but you shouldn't worry about anything else. You can return to your duties and I will update you if the need arises."

"Thank you, sir.," Phasma says as she goes to leave the office.

Hux relaxed into his chair as Phasma leaves. He had actually thought of everything that Phasma mentioned, but didn’t feel the need to enter into deep discussion with her at this point. He didn't think he or anyone else in the First Order had much "favor" with Snoke beyond what could be done to meet Snoke's own personal goals. He was still not privy to what that was after all this time. He thought it was the height of disrespect that he wasn't updated on the status of his co-commander. With their connection through the force, Snoke would have to know if Ren was in trouble or hurt. It was quieter on the ship without Ren, but it was a lot less interesting too. 

At their next scheduled meeting, Hux asked Snoke directly about Ren's tardiness in returning from his mission. 

"Should we be concerned that we have not heard from Ren, Supreme Leader? He's been gone long past the anticipated mission length?"

"General Hux, while I appreciate your concern for your co-commander, it is not your place to worry about this change in plan. I have diverted Kylo Ren to another assignment and as a matter of fact, I may as well tell you that you should not be expecting Kylo Ren to return to the Finalizer in his role of co-commander. I have other plans for him now. In the near future, you should expect another Knight of Ren to replace him. I will alert you when that time has come. Now that will be all, General Hux."

"Yes, Supreme Leader." As he left the holochamber, Hux was a bit stunned by this turn of events. He knew this was not a good sign for him or the First Order. He'd need to carefully contemplate his next moves. 

Snoke sat in his throne room rather pleased with himself. His plan was closer to coming together by the day. Kylo Ren would finally demonstrate his worth to him. 

__________________________________________________

General Leia was pouring over the many mounds of data she was expected to review as one of the unfortunate responsibilities of her job. She was doing what she had always done in this capacity, but she jumped in with more zeal since Kylo Ren had killed her husband Han Solo. She had felt the guilt in Ben as soon as the light saber plunged through Han's chest. She hated what her son had done, but she couldn't help but want him back in her life in some way. She was waiting for Luke to make his return to her life, but she had already waited so long and she wasn't sure if the training with Rey (if he decides to train her) would bear fruit in the way that she wanted. As she was deep in thought, Poe Dameron knocked on her door and she told him to enter. 

"General Organa, I just wanted to touch base with you on some information that might be of interest on Kylo Ren."

"Go ahead, Poe."

"Our sources tell us that he has disappeared and hasn't returned from a mission that was meant to last for 3 days. They also tell us that Snoke doesn't seem to be concerned about Kylo Ren's absence."

"That is some odd news indeed, Poe. Please keep me informed of anything else that may be of interest. Thank you."

"You're welcome, General.," Poe left the office to return to his work.

Leia pondered this news. Ben had felt even more "far away" than usual recently, but she could sense a change in him for the better. She could only hope that this was good news, but why wasn't Snoke concerned?

_________________________________________________

 

Luke was in deep meditation while Rey was training on her own. From time to time, he would "check in" on Kylo Ren as he expected him to come for Rey at some point. He could sense a great change in his nephew and that he almost seemed "happy" in a way that he never was before. He could only see this as a positive thing, but he wondered how this would affect the inevitable confrontation with Snoke and which side Ben would be on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all who have read so far!! I plan to update often, but I still need feedback please!!


	11. The One Who Makes Me Happy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben gets a job

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More love and sex!!

It had been a few weeks since they had met officially and they already found a routine in their relationship. They spent every waking moment with each other except for when Natalie went to her job at the hospital. Ben spent his time at home alone meditating, doing housework, and working out. When Natalie came home, they ate together and Ben gave her back and foot massages which generally put her to sleep so he gathered her up and placed her in their bed for the night. He would wake up to find Natalie giving him head which he really appreciated and they would sometimes have sex if she had time before work. On her days off from the hospital, they would do research on the creeps she would put on her list to terrorize. Natalie wanted Ben to get out of the house and back her up while she was on the street. It was a perfect use really for his Force powers and it was something they could bond over. He was getting bored at home while she was gone and had put some thought into what he could do with his time. Natalie said to him, "You have an extremely rare opportunity, Ben. You're in a place and time where no one knows or expects anything from you. You could really do anything you want with your life and I will support you." Ben had never had that chance before. He had been expected to play some sort of major role involving the Force due to his lineage or become a smuggler like his father. He never felt like he really had a choice in the matter and no one ever asked him. He still wasn't sure what he wanted to do with his life, but at least he had choices and someone he loved who didn't care which choice he made as long as it made him happy. 

One night after she came home from work, Natalie suggested, "How about you come and work at the hospital? They need an orderly on my shift. There is nothing to the job, just mostly transporting patients and helping out where you can. I can vouch for you and Twitch can get you some fake identification materials so you can get past the human resources people. At least we could see each other and you would feel safe there." Ben replied, "I'll think about it." 

Ben decided he was interested the next week and they got the fake IDs from Twitch a few days after that. Ben got the job without an issue based on Natalie's reference. They celebrated that night at home with their favorite take out and some plans to watch some movies. 

"Are you nervous about your first day on the job? I'm sure I could help you relax.," Natalie said as she tenderly kissed Ben's plump lips.

Ben relished the kiss and stole a few more before stating, "I'm not worried about doing the job really. I worry about my people skills. I never really had friends or dealt with people particularly well." 

"It will be good practice for you. Most people will need your help so as long as you do your best to help them that will be half the battle. I will be around if you need something. Now we have to be professional at all times so that means no hanky panky and no one there will know that we are together."

"I promise I'll be good at work, Nat. Unless you change your mind cause I can always put a force bubble around us so no one will hear a thing.," Ben said as he went in to lightly nip at her sensitive neck with his teeth followed by a playful lick. 

"Oh no, I can't go around work reeking of sex. I'll never live it down. My patients and co-workers shouldn't have to suffer like that. Besides, we only live around the corner. We could just take our breaks at home if we can't wait to get off until we get off." This conversation was going in a predictable direction. 

Ben backed Natalie onto the couch and landed on top of her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and they kissed and caressed each other. Ben ran his large hands under Natalie's shirt so he could help her remove it. Natalie raised her arms so it could make things easier. She then licked and nipped at his left ear as Ben moaned. She continued to make her way to his jaw, neck, and chest while she worked to take off his shirt. They both turned their hands to each other's pants and they both maneuvered out of them. They laid together nearly naked except for their underwear. Natalie stroked Ben through his underwear and lapped at his nipples. Ben ground his hips into Natalie's hand and cupped his hands around Natalie's buttocks. "Touch me, please.," Ben groaned then Natalie moved her hand into Ben's underwear and stroked his dick with purpose. Ben passionately kissed Natalie and slowly plunged his tongue in and out of her mouth. Natalie sucked on Ben's tongue gently and they moaned into each other's mouths. 

"I wanna taste you.," Ben breathed softly as he looked into Natalie's eyes. She caressed his hair and pushed him gently down toward her crotch. He took her underwear off with his teeth and discarded them. He licked at her clit and savored the taste of her. He could tell she enjoyed it by the way she gripped his hair and the sounds she made. He loved making her come more than he needed his own release. Sappily, that was because he loved her so much and he would do anything to make her happy which made him deliriously happy.

He sucked a bit at her clit and followed up with licks with the flat and tip of his tongue. Natalie's higher pitched moans told him she was ready to take him, but he would keep going if she asked. She gently pulled him up toward her mouth to taste herself on his lips and tongue. She quietly said, "Please fuck me, Ben. I need you." He stroked the scarred side of her face and kissed her hotly before he obliged her. He knelt between her legs and lined up his cock to enter her. When he was fully seated in her, he began to thrust gently. He placed her ankles on either side of his head and leaned over her to bend her in half while he increased his pace. He looked in her eyes and kissed her while he was fucking her. It intensified their sex and he loved it. He felt so connected to her when they were like this. As his pace had increased, he could feel Natalie tighten around him. They both moaned loudly as they kissed through their orgasms. 

Ben was still hard as usual with all of their encounters. Natalie loved that because it was a rarity as far as she knew and it indicated to her that he still wanted her. She also took it as a challenge to see if she could drain him to the point that his dick would soften, but no such luck yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need constructive criticism please!! I am anxious for comments and I wouldn't mind some subscriptions if you really want to follow this work.


	12. The One Who Needs Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie go to work together, but Natalie suffers a crisis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalie sees someone from her past and has trouble dealing with it.

Ben and Natalie walked to work together, but went their separate ways once there. It was different for Ben to see Nat in a professional environment, but she thrived there. She was authoritative when she needed to be and warm when she needed to be. The patients and her coworkers loved her and thought she did a great job. He was lucky enough to go in with her for some of the patients when he wasn't busy with other things. Once he got to see her sew up a young boy's face who had an accident at home. The parents were insistent that a plastic surgeon come down to the ER to do it and Nat was unflappable as she obliged them. Plastics came down, but once the surgeon knew Natalie was the one doing it, he talked to the parents and told them that if his child was in the same position, he would ask for Natalie to do the job. He also explained that they had tried for years to recruit Natalie into their service, but she turned them down because she wanted to do more patient care. The parents relented reluctantly, probably because they saw Natalie's scar. The little boy was scared also when he saw Natalie's scar and he asked her about it. "Well, a bad man tried to hurt me and he left me with this scar. But I was scared of telling people what happened to me so I never got it fixed. So now I have the scar to remind me that fear kept me from doing something that I should do and now I try very hard to not let fear run my life. "

This seemed to make the little boy and the parents feel a lot better. The boy also looked at Ben's scar and asked him what happened. Ben said, "I got overconfident in a fight with a girl because she was smaller than me and less powerful than me. Now I have the scar as a lesson never to underestimate your opponent and to take every opponent seriously." 

The boy said, "Maybe the lesson we all need to learn is that we should all stay away from sharp objects."  
All the adults in the room laughed and the tension in the room seemed to diffuse. Nat setup her supplies to sew up the boy's face and got the parents involved as well. The boy did well and his parents thanked Natalie for her work. She gave them the follow up instructions and they left with their son.

Ben said, "You are really good at this. You handled that situation perfectly. Do people judge you because of the scar a lot?"

"I've gotten used to it. Some people are not easily convinced to let me do my job, but I don't worry about it. People will always do what makes them comfortable and if I can't help them, there is always someone else that will accept my help."

Ben really wanted to kiss her, so he decided he should see if someone else needed him before things went too far. Natalie cleaned up the room for the next patient and went to finish up her documentation. 

They worked together again when a homeless man came in after being beat up by some kids. Natalie called him a "frequent flier" because he was in and out of the ER every week or so. She was very familiar with him because he had a mental health history which probably made him an easy target for people who wanted to take advantage of someone. The man had gotten used to dealing with Natalie and he always asked for her. It was sometimes difficult dealing with the man because he often was paranoid and would talk to himself sometimes. It scared the nurses, providers, and other patients so Natalie didn't mind taking him on since he was a regular. She told herself that one day she would find the "kids" that were beating him and causing him to need regular medical treatment, but that was for another time. Natalie knew it could be a risk to bring Ben in while she was treating the man because Ben was so imposing due to his size and there was no telling how the patient would react to his scar. She warned Ben that it was possible he might be asked to leave if the patient couldn't tolerate his presence and Ben understood. Barney pulled his usual antics, but seemed ok with Ben being there. Natalie finished up some staples in the man's scalp and a couple stitches in his face then cleaned him up. He said thank you and Natalie gave him her card so that he could ask for her again if he needed anything . 

Ben was starting to get a feel for the things Nat had to deal with on a regular basis at work and he admired her all the more for it. He went out to check if he needed to transport anyone or if anyone else needed help. Their shift was gonna be over in about an hour and he wanted to make sure that things were caught up so they could go home together. 

Natalie picked up another chart after she cleaned up the room. It was a man who had come in with some scratches and bruises on his face. He probably wasn't going to need any huge workup and this was probably going to be her last patient for the night. She headed toward the room and when she walked in, the man was laying on the exam table asleep. She looked at his face and she recognized him……she hadn't seen him in more than 5 years---it was the man who had raped and tortured her, who had meant to kill her if she hadn't been lucky enough to escape. She froze and slowly backed out of the room so as not to wake him, but her mind was awash in fear.

Ben was at the opposite end of the hallway from where he had just seen Nat go. He picked up a projection of intense fear and it was coming from Nat's direction. He made his way toward her and he saw her back out of the room. She looked scared out of her mind, but could not say a word. 

"Nat, are you ok? What happened?"

She was still paralyzed with fear and couldn't answer him.

Ben was about to question her again, but her eyes rolled to the back of her head and he had to catch her to keep her from falling to the floor. "I need some help over here, please!" One of the ER docs came over and asked him to take her to an exam room. The doctor asked Ben what happened, but he wasn't sure and he happened to be in the right place at the right time to catch her before she fell. The doctor examined her and a nurse came in to do her vital signs. There was nothing outwardly wrong and the doctor asked the nurse to start an IV and obtain blood. Natalie woke up as this was happening. The doctor asked Natalie what happened. "I haven't been sleeping well and I skipped lunch so I think maybe my blood sugar dropped." Ben heard Nat's explanation, but he knew it was a lie because they had gone to lunch together. Dr. Costa said, "Ok, well your shift is almost over so I want you out of here tonight and don't think of coming back tomorrow either. I will see you back next week and I hope you will be good as new. We need you well. New guy, can you make sure she gets home ok? She doesn't live far. I will talk to your supervisor and let them know you're leaving early, ok?" Ben agreed cause this was his plan anyway. He wasn't going to stay if Nat needed him. Ben gathered his and Nat's things so they could go home. He helped Nat up from the exam table and they made their way out of the ER. 

 

On their way home, Ben asked Natalie, "What happened baby? Are you alright? Why did you lie to the doctor about missing lunch?" 

Natalie replied, "I can't right now, can we go somewhere other than home, please? I need to be somewhere else right now."

"Ok, as long as I am with you. You can't be alone right now."

Natalie pulled up her Uber app and proceeded to order a car to a place that she needed to be. Ben was extremely worried, but hoped wherever they were going that it would make Nat feel better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I would appreciate any constructive criticism or kudos if you enjoy the work!!


	13. The One Who Is Like Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie go to a seedy bar. There will be blood and darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben discovers another side to Natalie and it draws them closer. Please read the updated tags.

Natalie and Ben arrived at a seedy bar in a horrible neighborhood. Ben assessed the surroundings and asked, "Nat, are you sure that this is the right place? This doesn't look like the type of place you would hang out in." 

"What are you talking about, Ben? This is totally my kind of place. Come on, we're getting a drink."

Ben silently followed Natalie into the bar and they found a table to sit at. She observed the people in the room for a bit. She asked Ben what he would like to drink. Ben was never an alcohol drinker and he didn't want his judgment clouded while he was in this dive bar so he could protect Nat. "Just water is fine."

Natalie went over to the bar to order their drinks. A big guy came over to her and put his hand on her low back with intentions to move down to her ass. Ben was about to jump up and rescue her, but Natalie whispered something into the guy's ear and gave Ben a hand sign that meant she was ok, so he stayed in his seat. The guy headed outside and Nat returned to their table with their drinks after she paid for them. "What did you say to him?" 

"I told him that it wasn't a good idea to touch me and he went away."

"Just like that?"

"Yea." Natalie finished her drink and told Ben she was gonna be right back after she went to the bathroom. Ben figured she would be ok in the bathroom by herself so he waited at the table. He started drinking his water and tried to run through things in his mind. If Nat just wanted to drink, he knew there was alcohol in the house. Why did they have to come so far to go to a bar? Just then, he felt some thing familiar. It was like the projection of fear he picked up from Nat earlier at the hospital, except now it was a projection of extreme rage. He followed it outside and found Natalie beating the shit out of the guy who hit on her earlier. 

"Who the fuck do you think you are that you can touch me like that? I'm gonna kill you so you can never hurt another woman again, you piece of shit!!," Natalie yelled as she punched the guy in the face and was getting covered in his blood.

Ben grabbed her to pull her off the guy and had to fight with her to get her to let go. 

"Get off me, Ben!!," she yelled. "He deserves to die for what he did to me!!"

The guy on the ground was bleeding profusely from his face, but Ben could tell he would be fine with some medical treatment. Natalie was very nearly feral and Ben recognized this as he had been like this himself…when he was under the influence of the dark side. 

"You can't just go around killing people, Nat. Baby, I need to get you home. You're not well. Let's get you cleaned up and then we have to get out of here." Ben turned his attention to the guy on the ground, told him to go into the bar to clean himself up so he could go home, and that he wouldn't remember anything that happened to him tonight. The guy stumbled into the bar to clean up.

Natalie seemed to calm down enough to realize that they needed to leave. "I'm sorry, you're right I need to go home. Let me call a car.," she said as she took off her top shirt to clean off the blood from her skin. She went quiet and let Ben lead her to the street so they could get their ride. 

Natalie didn't say anything on the ride home as she laid on Ben's chest and he stroked her hair to try to comfort her. He was so worried about her and he felt he should have anticipated what happened at the bar. She was in no shape to go anywhere tonight. Ben still didn't even know what happened at the hospital really because she hadn't told him. 

The car dropped them off at Nat's house and they road the elevator up to the top floor. Natalie walked into the house and made a beeline for the alcohol. She drank a couple glasses and then made her way back to the living room couch. Ben watched her and said, "You know you can talk to me. What happened at work, Nat?" He moved toward the couch to get closer to her, but waited for her to speak. Natalie took another drink before looking Ben in the eyes and speaking.

" I saw the man who raped me tonight. I haven't seen him since that night. I didn't think I would ever see him again. I always imagined that if I did that I would kill him, but I had my chance tonight and I cowered in fear of him. He looked the same except he had scratches on his face, probably from someone else he raped. I didn't think about that. I could have saved someone else he victimized, but I just ran. Like a coward…" 

Ben moved slowly toward her and took her in his arms to hold her. "You aren't a coward. You got caught by surprise and you weren't sure what to do. There is no shame in that." 

"I was ashamed of myself. So I thought if I could find another bastard who likes to victimize women and hurt him that it would make me feel better. I can't go back to being that weak, sniveling person that I was before. I'll die before I let that happen, Ben. I can't, I can't……," She reached for another drink and Ben stopped her to convince her to look at him. 

"You won't be that person. You are one of the strongest people I know. We will figure this out." 

Natalie gently pulled away from Ben and took three drinks quickly. "I don't want to feel like this. I need you to help me, please. " Natalie mounted Ben and started kissing him passionately. Ben loved kissing Nat, but he knew that she was looking for distraction and not wanting to deal with reality right now. 

"You don't have to be gentle with me anymore. I can play rough. I'm not weak. I need you, Kylo.," Natalie said breathlessly. 

Ben was surprised by that name that he hadn't heard from anyone since he was back in his time. Nat never called him that. She can't know what she is asking. Kylo wasn't appropriate in Ben and Natalie's relationship. He wasn't appropriate for any relationship. 

Natalie kept kissing him while she removed his shirt. Ben was getting hard but this wasn't surprising with the position they were in. She caressed his nipples and she started to move her mouth down his chest. She bit and sucked hard at his left pectoral and Ben's breath was caught in his throat. He liked that a lot. Natalie did the same on the right side, but she drew a little blood this time. Ben moaned and when he saw the drips of blood on Natalie's lips, he grabbed her head up to him and caught her in a deep kiss which drew more moans from the both of them. 

Ben was confused by his psychosexual responses. He thought that this might be wrong, but It felt so good and Natalie seemed to be enjoying it. Natalie said, "I want you to bite me, Kylo. Suck bruises in to my skin. Bruise me with your hands. Make me forget, just make me forget, please."

Ben wasn't sure about this, but everything Nat said made his dick twitch. This was different from their previous sex and he hoped that she wouldn't regret this in the morning.

Ben tentatively bit into Natalie's left shoulder hard enough to bruise and she begged for him to do it harder. He did and drew blood drawing a deep moan from Natalie. When Ben raised his head, Natalie attacked his bloody lips hungrily and they both groaned. They hurriedly removed the rest of their clothes. 

Natalie grabbed Ben's shirt and used it tie his hands behind his head. She knew he could escape, but she also knew he would keep it on for now. She made her way down to his right lower abdomen and bit him until he bled. Ben loved the pain and the pleasure he got from this. Natalie lapped up the blood from the wound she created and stroked Ben's dick until he was leaking precome all over himself. Natalie seated herself on Ben's dick and rolled her hips to meet him. Ben stared into Natalie's eyes for a few moments and sensed that she like he was going to come fairly quickly. He moved his mouth to her right shoulder and bit in till she bled until they both came hard and screaming. 

As they came down, Natalie kissed Ben's bloody lips and she undid his hands. She raised herself off of Ben, who was of course still hard. "I am gonna drain you tonight, Kylo.," she said as she bent over the arm of the couch. Ben got up from the couch and placed himself behind her. They had not had sex with him in this position before. All of their previous encounters were face to face which he loved, but now they seemed to be giving in to some of their darkness and it had intensified everything. Ben entered Natalie from behind gently and started slow. He could now appreciate the gnarled scars on her back. "Grab the back of my neck, Kylo!," Natalie said and she angled her hips to meet Ben as he fucked her from the back. Ben obliged her and moved his mouth to an area between her shoulder blades to bite deeply. Natalie's mouth formed an "O" and it drew out into an elongated moan. Ben let the blood fall down her back until it landed right above her ass. He let it stay there as he picked up his pace and he could see the dribble of blood jump from his fucking her from behind. "Grab my hair and fuck me harder, Kylo!" Ben obliged her and grasped her hips with his other hand. He anticipated the bruises that would form from this. "Harder, Kylo!! I'm gonna……..," then she released a guttural moan. Ben kept fucking into her and reached his release soon after with his own guttural moan. He pulled out of her after he softened and again found the drips of blood on her ass so he could lick them up. He couldn't resist a hard bite to her ass cheek, just meant to tease. 

They turned to face each other, both sated. They kissed each other deeply and held each other, both thinking about what this new kink, if you could call it that would mean for them. Ben gathered Natalie into his arms and they both got in bed only to fall asleep soon after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, please give me feedback!!


	14. The One I Worry For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie has the day off. Ben and Twitch team up to help her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No smut in this chapter. Very dialogue heavy in this one.

Ben woke up a few hours after they went to bed. Natalie was still sound asleep and he stroked and kissed her hair and face softly. He ran over their last sexual encounter in his mind. Nat had initiated the biting and blood drawing, but she was drinking and still reeling from seeing her rapist earlier in the evening. Ben wasn't sure how she was going to feel about this when she had more time to think about it. He questions how he let it get so far, but it made him feel complete. He loved her so fucking much and he was ok with the sex that had been having already, but this was a game changer. 

It felt like Nat accepted his darkness more fully and that made Ben feel more accepted by her. She had never said anything about not accepting him, but Ben had always been down on himself and that wasn't going to change because he was in a relationship. It wasn't until he "turned" to the dark side that he felt some sort of acceptance by anyone and he felt powerful. They really needed to talk about this, but he needed more sleep. He still had work in the morning and even though he wanted to stay home with Nat cause he was worried about her, he had a feeling she wouldn't like him playing hooky. Maybe he'll call Twitch in the morning and ask him to check on Nat while he goes to work. Ben again softly stroked and kissed Nat's face and hair before he drifted back to sleep. 

Natalie woke up about 5am and made a beeline for the bathroom to puke. She stayed in the bathroom for about 20 minutes to make sure that everything came up. Her head was killing her and this was way worse that the daily dull headaches she was becoming used to. After she felt more steady, she went to the kitchen to drink a big glass of water. When her stomach settled, she went down to the gym to try to get in a workout. She wouldn't overdo it, but she wanted to get a good sweat going. After working out she would need to start researching where she could find "him." She felt like shit, but she hoped a little exercise would help her feel better.

Ben awoke to find Natalie not in bed with him. He left the bedroom to find her, but when he opened the door to the gym, he could hear music blaring and he knew she was down there. He got in the shower, brushed his teeth, groomed himself, and got dressed for work. He made his way down the gym to see Nat before he went off to work.

Do I look lonely?  
I see the shadows on my face  
People have told me I don't look the same  
Maybe I've lost weight  
I'm playing hooky  
With the best of the best  
Pull my heart out my chest  
So that you can see it too

Ben could see Nat making her way around the track singing loudly as she ran like she always did. He waited until she could see him coming toward her so she wouldn't be surprised by his presence. They smiled as they moved toward each other. 

"On your way to work already?," Natalie said.

"I don't want to be late. I can still call out if you want me to stay with you. I wouldn't mind, Nat."

"Ben, I promise I won't leave the house today. We can talk when you get home"

"OK.," Ben said as he leaned down to kiss her goodbye. Natalie stopped him and said, "I've been throwing up and I'm all sweaty." Ben unconsciously reached out to gently grab her neck with his large hand and stroked it with his thumb. Ben again bent down to kiss her and said, "You know I don't care about that. I love you." He could see her pupils dilate as he got closer and took her into a deep kiss. Before he pulled away, he touched his forehead to hers and closed his eyes while he stroked her hair. "I love you too, I'll be ok, Ben." 

"Ok baby, please call me if you need anything."

"I will, goodbye."

Ben left for work, but he was still worried so he decided he would call Twitch to see if he could come by to check on Nat while he was at work. 

__________________________________________________

After Natalie finished her workout, she drank another couple glasses of water. She started to feel like she could handle some food so she ate some cereal. She was dog tired, but she had a lot to do. After she ate, she got in the shower, brushed her teeth, and got dressed. A nap sounded great right now. She would just lay down for a few minutes and then she could get down to business. 

Twitch was making his way into the warehouse to check on Natalie. He could come by anytime cause Natalie gave him the access codes and keys to all the other doors with locks. He called out to her when the elevator reached the top floor. She didn't answer, so he looked around the house for her. Ben said she wasn't leaving the house today. Twitch figured it must be important to check on Nat if Ben felt the need to call him. He finally found Nat in one of the bedrooms and she was sleeping soundly. Twitch thought she looked like hell, but he was gonna wake her to see if he could get a handle on whatever was happening with her. 

"Nat, It's Twitch. Honey, wake up. I just came by to check on you!," as he shook her gently. She stirred and saw him. She hugged him and muttered with a scratchy voice, "Twitch, Hi. Why are you here?"

"Ben called me, love. He wanted me to check on you while he was working. What is going on with you that had him so worried?"

Natalie wasn't in the mood to talk about this and she realized that she had slept for three hours before Twitch got there. "The guy that raped me showed up at the ER last night looking for care. He didn't see me, but I freaked out when I saw him. I passed out and Ben caught me. They were about to give me the full court press when I woke up and the ER doc sent me home and gave me the day off today. "

Twitch sat on the bed with Nat and put his arms around her. "Baby, I'm sorry that happened to you."

"That is not all. After me and Ben left the ER, I got us an Uber to a fucking dive bar and I nearly killed a guy who tried to hit on me. Ben stopped me and got me home. Twitch, I practically ran from the ER to get away from a man I've wanted to kill for years. A man I'm reasonably sure had just raped and killed some other woman last night and then came looking for medical care for his wounds. I need to find him ASAP. He can't be allowed to hurt anyone else. How many women do you think he's hurt since I got away from him?," Natalie said as her eyes filled with tears.

"You don't need to think about that, darling. If there were any other victims, that has nothing to do with you. You can't save everyone just because you were lucky enough to save yourself. It's taken you a long time to build yourself back up since that shit happened to you. Don't go down this road. Do the research and give what you find to the police. You should stay out of it!"

"If I had reported what happened to the police, maybe they could have caught him. I was too selfish to do the right thing at the time. I owe it to those women to put him down now!"

"You owe it to yourself to have a life. You deserve it, honey. I could tell from talking to Ben this morning that things have changed between you two. He is clearly in love with you. Don't throw that away because you need revenge. It could ruin your life, baby."

"I love him too, Twitch. More than I ever thought I could and it scares me. I have to do this, no matter what the cost. I will never be able to let this go."

"What can I do to help you? You know I have contacts that could root him out. And I know Ben would help. I don't know him well, but I can tell he is someone who can handle himself. Together, we won't let anything happen to you. I can't lose my best friend over this cretin." 

"Of course, I will let you know if I need you. Thanks for coming by today. I missed you. Don't be a stranger, Twitch!!"

"Ok, I know when I am being kicked out. I am satisfied you are ok right now, but I reserve the right to check in on you from time to time, darling."

"Thank you, Twitch. I love you. Call me later."

"I will lock up on the way out. Bye sweetie," Twitch says as he kisses Natalie's forehead then heads back to the elevator.

Natalie feels exhausted from seeing Twitch and she needs to get out of bed, but she falls back into a deep sleep. 

When Twitch makes it back to the cozy confines of his place, he calls Ben. 

"Hello"

"Ben, it's Twitch. I just got back from seeing Nat."

"Was she ok to you?"

"She was really tired and I'm worried. She's obsessed with getting this guy and I don't blame her, but I don't want to see her hurt. We need to work together to make sure nothing happens to her, Ben"

"I knew you would feel the same way. That's why I called you. Twitch, if you would have seen her at the bar with that guy. She was unhinged. I worry she won't be able to get her mind right to handle things with this guy. I promise you I will do anything in my power to keep her safe and I need your help."

"You will call me with whatever you need. Don't hesitate at all. Goodbye, Ben."

"Goodbye, Twitch and thank you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to for_autumn_I_am (who has a Suit Porn AU for Kylux ship and I can swear I hear Death of a Bachelor in my mind when I read her fic) and Panic! At the Disco. As always, I need lots of feedback and constructive criticism. Kudos don't hurt either!!


	15. The One Who Accepts Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie and Ben review the previous night's goings on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some talk about biting and blood kink. Smut to come later.

When Ben got home from work, he found Nat in bed asleep. She looked a little worse for wear, but she was still beautiful this way to him. He took a shower and changed into some shorts and a T-shirt. He was really tempted to join Nat in bed, but they really needed to talk. He was worried about her, but he was also worried about them and their relationship after everything that happened last night.

He knelt next to the bed where she was sleeping. He kissed and stroked her face and hair. Ben gently shook her to wake her up. "Nat, wake up. I'm home." Natalie stirred, opened her eyes, and said "Hi, baby. Did you have a good day at work?" 

"Nothing exciting. Honestly, I spent most of the day worrying about you. Are you feeling alright? What did you do today?"

Natalie yawned before answering, "Unfortunately, I really got nothing done today after my workout. I was wiped out and just got a ton of sleep. Now that I am up, I am starved. I am gonna get up, shower, order some food, and then we can talk. That sound ok to you?"

Ben kissed Nat deeply. She tasted of sleep and vanilla. "Sounds good, I'll meet you in the living room."

Natalie took a quick shower, got dressed, and strode into the living room. She ordered some takeout from one of their favorite places and went to the kitchen to grab some munchies before she joined Ben on the couch. "I'm sorry, I am so hungry that I can't wait for the food to come."

"It's ok, baby." Things were a bit awkward between them for a moment. "Can we talk about last night?"

"Where do you want to start? With my freak out at work? My attempt to kill a complete stranger? Our weird but totally awesome vampire sex romp?" She said all this as she was munching on snacks. 

"I'm glad we agree that it was weird but totally awesome, but how else did you feel about it?," Ben questioned. 

"I've never done anything like that before. I was flailing after what happened at work and at the bar. I needed to try to ground myself and stop thinking for awhile. I wanted to let go and not try to be so good, I wanted to be bad just for a few moments. To just give in. Do you understand, Ben?"

Ben felt relieved by her answer. "Yes, I do. I felt like you pulled something out of me that I didn't know I still needed. I felt guilty after last night, like I corrupted you somehow. That I had somehow unleashed your dark side."

"Everyone has a dark side, Ben. I accept everything about you. I couldn't be with you if I hadn't. You aren't corrupting me. Maybe you are just making it possible for me to be more accepting of the things about myself that I don't always want to show people. I know I can show all my sides to you and you won't judge me." She finished the snacks she was eating and was about to go to the kitchen for more before she heard the intercom for the food delivery. 

Natalie went downstairs to collect the food. When she returned, she had a bunch more food than they usually ordered. Ben said, "Baby, are you ok? You got enough food to feed us for days!"

"I just ate cereal today and then slept the rest of the day away. I'm just really hungry. I'm fine."

She took the food to the kitchen and brought back some plates for her and Ben to the couch. 

"You sent Twitch to check on me today. Why?"

"He knows you well and I am worried about you trying to find this dirtbag. I just wanted his input on how I can help you." 

"I love that you both are so concerned about me, I do. If the point of your concern is to try to convince me to give up looking for the man that practically ruined my life, then you can both give it up. I will not stop until I find him and kill him." 

"I won't stop you from finding him, but I am worried that you won't be ready to deal with the consequences of your actions. You're not a killer, Nat. Once you do this, there is no turning back. It will change you forever. Believe me, I know! I also don't want you to get hurt!"

"I don't want to get hurt either, but it is a hazard of what I have chosen to do. You've seen that remember? The night we met?"

"This one is different because it is intensely personal for you. If you can't control your emotions, it could get you killed, Nat!"

"Look, I know that you and Twitch can help me with this. Trust me, I won't go off half cocked without a plan. "

Natalie kept eating while they were talking and she looked like she was working on her 3rd helping. Ben started laughing at her, but he found it adorable. "You still having headaches, Nat?"

"Yes, I have had some. It's nothing, probably stress or sinus pressure. "

"You sure you don't need to see a doctor, baby. Now is not the time for you to get sick."

"Baby, I promise once this thing with the guy is over, I will see someone if it is still an issue." She stopped eating to kiss him slowly. 

"I love you, baby.," Ben murmured against Natalie's lips. Natalie responded, "Me too. I think you must have put a spell on me with your Force powers. You have me absolutely drunk with love for you. Are you sure you didn't put a whammy on me, Ben?"

"I promise I didn't and I wouldn't because it wouldn't be real. I am beginning to wonder if you have Force powers and have put a spell on me.," Ben says as he laps at and kisses the bites he left on Natalie's body. 

"Ok, no spells by anyone, just batshit crazy things happening to both of us bringing us together. I am just glad we found each other and hope neither one of us finds a way to screw it up. If we are gonna keep leaving love bites on each other, my medical mindset tells me we should at least clean our wounds before we go to bed.," Natalie sighs with desire as Ben continues his ministrations.

"Um hmm," Ben murmurs to agree as his mouth is busy exploring Natalie's body.

"Ok, let me get the antiseptic and gauze out for later. And let's choose other places to bite so we can decrease the risk of infection."

"Um hmm," Ben murmurs again to agree before he moves to a spot on her chest below her collarbone to nip at lightly. Ben looks up from the spot to see Natalie's pupils blown wide with lust. 

"You are going to be the death of me, Ben Solo!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would love some feedback!! I promise I don't bite even if the characters do!!


	16. The One I Must Protect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie and Ben talk about the future. Ben has an ominous dream and thinks about the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The afterglow of smut and a ton of worry for Ben.

Ben and Natalie had been at it for hours. Their bodies were littered with "love bites." They couldn't get enough of each other, but they finally gave in to fatigue. They laid in each other's arms and kissed each other deeply. Natalie pulled back and said, "You know, I think I may have given you an inflated sense of sex in relationships. I don't think most people fuck this much. This is like porn star epic. Not that I am complaining, but I am older than you. I know this won't be as fun when I am 60."

Ben laughed and said, " Nat, I know this is hard to believe but I could probably go without if you really wanted to. It's just that we're both so….responsive to each other. I told you before. I will take what you are willing to give me."

"Aww, so it's my fault, huh? Do you mind if we take a break now? I'm hungry again and we could both use a shower before I clean our wounds up."

"I don't mind. I will meet you out front when I get out of the shower."

"Ok, sounds like a plan." 

They both showered and met at the kitchen. Natalie took out the takeout leftovers and made a plate for herself. Ben just grabbed some small snacks. They joined each other on the living room couch. Natalie practically wolfed down her food and went to grab the supplies to clean their wounds.

Natalie started with Ben first. She dabbed the gauze with antiseptic and proceeded to clean his skin. "This may burn a little, ok"

"I'll be fine. I've had a lot worse."

"Did you always know that pain was…exciting for you?"

"I used pain as a way to access the dark side of the Force. It increased my power. I think the excitement from it was just a lucky discovery being that pain was a part of my training."

"Does it bother you when I talk with you about your old life, Ben? I don't mean anything by it, but I just learn more about you." 

"It doesn't bother me, but it's just the memories. With life the way it is now for me, I realize how much I regret some things."

"Like what happened with your uncle and your father?"

"Yes, there are things I would give anything to take back, but there are some things that I don't think I would change."

"Everyone feels that way, Ben. Like I said, your situation is unique in that you can totally reinvent yourself. Have you thought anymore about your future?"

"Other than how much I want you in it, I haven't given much thought to the future."

"Well, you have plenty of time to think about it. How do you feel? Tired?"

"Yea, I think I'm gonna go back to bed. You coming?"

"No, I'm gonna clean my skin up and I'm totally wired from sleeping all day so I think I will do some of that research that I was supposed to do earlier."

"Ok, don't stay up too late. I love you. Goodnight," Ben said as he kissed her lips softly.

"I love you too, goodnight."

Ben went in to the bedroom. Natalie cleaned herself up and put the supplies away. Then she sat in front of her computer. She met this guy on an internet date years ago and never chased any of the information from that time. She still remembered the username and site she used so she could make some calls in the morning to follow up on that. 

The name he used at the ER for care was Richard Johnson. So clearly an alias and leave it to him to use names that just say that he's a dick! He left no insurance information, but the billing people would have had an address and possibly some employment information so that this guy could expect to pay for his care in some way. 

It would probably be a good idea to setup profiles on the websites this guy could use to search for other victims. She already knew what type he was looking for so that would make things easy on her end. Natalie went about making a ton of profiles on sites that she thought this guy would use. Slowly but surely, she was starting to get nauseous. 

She was going to throw up again. She probably hadn't drunk enough water to flush the alcohol from her system. She made it to the bathroom ok and sat in there awhile to make sure that everything came up. Once she felt it was safe, she drunk two large glasses of water. She was starting to get tired again so she laid out on the couch just in case she got sick again and wouldn't have to wake Ben in the middle of the night with trips back to the bathroom. Natalie thought she had gotten going in a good direction with her research so far and that made her feel better as she drifted off to sleep. 

Ben was sound asleep in the bedroom. He was dreaming about Nat. She was struggling against restraints while a faceless man was threatening her. The man said, "I should have looked harder for you. The one that got away. Not anymore." Nat was crying and begging for her life. Where was Ben? Why was Nat alone long enough for this guy to get ahold of her. The man raised a knife to Nat's throat and slit it. Blood gushed out of her mouth and throat. The light went out in her eyes.

Ben startled awake. He looked around the bedroom. Where was Nat? He left her out front hours ago. He rushed out of bed to find her on the living room couch sound asleep. He breathed a heavy sigh of relief. He knelt down beside her on the couch. He kissed and stroked her hair and face as he tended to do when he was awake and she was sleeping next to him. 

What was that? Was it a dream or premonition of something to come? It had to be a dream because there was no way he would let it happen in real life. Being with Nat was everything he had ever wanted and he wouldn't lose her to something like this. 

He was selfish in picking Nat up from the couch to bring her back to bed with him. He always slept better when she was next to him. He was probably overreacting, but he had the overwhelming need to make sure she was safe at this moment. Briefly, he thought about the stories of his grandfather Anakin Skywalker turning to the dark side to save his grandmother Padme Amidala, but he quickly forgot about that as he fell back to sleep in bed with Nat beside him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are ramping up. Always in need of feedback!!


	17. The One I'm Scared For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben has a dream and Natalie tries to set him straight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No smut this chapter. Very dialogue heavy.

Natalie woke up sick to her stomach. She suddenly realized that she was in bed with Ben with his arms wrapped around her instead of on the living room couch she initially fell asleep on. She worked her way out of Ben's arms and got to the toilet to throw up. She sat in the bathroom until she thought she wasn't in danger of throwing up again. She went to the kitchen to get a large glass of water. 

Ben woke up and Natalie wasn't there again. He slightly panicked and got out of bed to find Nat in the kitchen drinking water. "Morning, did I wake you Ben? Sorry, I got sick and had to go to the bathroom. You should go back to sleep if you're still tired."

Ben felt relieved to see her for the most part. "No, I'm fine. What do you mean sick? What's wrong?"

"You know, I drank like a fish yesterday, puked, slept all day, and then ate a enough food to feed a third world country. I think it will work itself out in the next day or so. Are you ok? I could swear I was sleeping on the couch last night, but you brought me to bed with you. Did you miss me?"

Ben should tell her about the dream he had, but he didn't want to upset her after the rough couple of days she'd had. "Yes, whenever we aren't together, I miss you. What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing is wrong with that. I am just getting used to being missed. Do you have any plans today?"

"I plan to be with you if that's ok. What are your plans?"

"I need to get going on some leads to find my guy. I need to make some calls and check on some irons I have in the fire. I wanna get this done as quickly as possible." 

Ben was slightly nervous talking about this subject. "Have you thought about the possibility of not finding him? What If you lose track of him and can't pick up his trail?"

"I won't accept that. I will look for him and if I can't find him, Twitch has gotta have some contacts that will find him. Now that's he's poked his head out of the rabbit hole, I won't lose him again. I can't because I know he is still hurting women. Besides, with you on my side, I won't fail. "

Ben bristled at that response. He hugged Natalie close and said, "Maybe we should just take some time for ourselves right now. Maybe we could go visit your family until this all blows over."

"Nothing is blowing over. I have to get him now. We talked about this already." She extricated herself from Ben's arms. "Look at me.," she said as she regarded his face for a moment. "I see why you always wore a helmet when you were Kylo Ren, Ben. You wear your emotions on your face. What are you hiding? What happened that you are trying to steer me away from this?"

Ben looked at Natalie's eyes and couldn't lie. " I had a dream that he killed you last night and I wasn't there to protect you. "

"A dream or a vision."

"I don't know. He had you tied up and he slit your throat. After that I woke up and very nearly had a heart attack because I couldn't find you, but you were on the couch sleeping. I needed to keep you close so I grabbed you up and put you in bed with me."

"I know it must have been scary for you.," she said as she made her way back to his arms.

"I don’t have a good feeling about this, Nat. I think you should let it go for now."

"I can't and won't let this go! I get it, I do, but this has to end!! For me and my sanity, for women's safety. I know you want to keep me close and that is ok. Just stand with me while I get this done."

"Of course, I will stand with you, but I can't help being worried. I don't want us to change and I don't want to lose you!"

"Baby, if you were going through the same thing, I would probably have the same concerns that you have. But this thing changed my life and as long as he is still out there it will hang over my head like a dark cloud. Even if there is a risk I might get hurt or die, I have to do this. Will you support me?"

Ben thought about it for a minute. "Of course, I will support you. But I want to be involved in everything. Please don't go off by yourself while this guy is still out there."

"I promise I won't. We'll do it together. Let's get dressed, have breakfast, and then we can get started."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys are enjoying this. Please let me know how I am doing!!


	18. The One I'm Connected With

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie find their man and Natalie puts herself at risk to do it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben's worrying and Natalie's obsession is starting to cause conflict between them.

So it turned out that the same "Richard Johnson" had been in to multiple hospital ERs in our local system for different injuries in the last couple months according to the computer records. These hospitals were of variable distance from each other, but he was using the same home and work addresses with each check in. This probably meant that he had access to different sites where he was keeping girls to get "work" done. This was likely the best lead we were going to get. 

The website stuff turned up jackshit, but she asked Twitch to have one of his hacker buddies follow up this loose end. It would be great to get this guy's actual name and it might make tracking him a lot easier. 

"We should stake out these two locations ASAP. They are probably the best chance we have to find him," Natalie said.

"Ok, let's go to the workplace today and the home tonight. I can actually shield us with the Force as long as we aren't interacting with anyone." 

"Sounds like a plan. This place isn't far away so we could walk it if you are ok with that."

"That sounds fine. We should try to work on our Force connection. It would be convenient if I could actually access your mind while we're out there. That way I would know if you're in trouble even if I can't see you."

"What do you suggest? So far, you've only been able to sense me when I projected really strong emotions."

"Right, but we haven't really tried to improve the connection. Honestly, we haven't really had to until now, but now is the time we should try harder."

"Ok, let's try something now before we leave."

They both moved to the living room couch and sat across from each other. "Try your best to relax, Nat. When you're relaxed as much as you can be, try and open your mind to me. I'm going to try and project my thoughts, then you tell me if you can hear me."

"I will try.," Natalie said as she closed her eyes and tried to relax. This was always difficult for her especially since the rape. She always felt like she had to be on high alert since then. If anyone could get her to relax, it should be Ben. After about a minute, Natalie tried to open her mind to Ben. This seemed difficult even though they were sitting right next to each other. About 5 minutes in, Natalie heard Ben speaking to her in her mind. "Can you hear me, Nat?," Ben said. 

Natalie was in awe of this and she projected to Ben, "Yes, Ben, I can hear you? This is so weird that I can hear you in my mind and you can hear me. Did you talk to other people like this all the time?"

"I actually haven't done it in a long time with anyone but Snoke. I used to do it with my mom and uncle back when I was with my family. But they were both Force users."

"So you never did it with anyone who wasn't a Force user?"

"I didn't really have the need to. I never had any friends and I probably would have scared any that I would have had trying to do this."

"So does this mean that we can do this anytime now?"

"I'm not sure, but at least we were able to make it happen in the first place."

Natalie was the first to break the silence in the room. "Ok, I think we should get to this guy's work and start surveilling him. I'm glad we could do this.," she said as she kissed him softly.

"Me too, we'll have to get in more practice at it later. Maybe in the bedroom.," Ben said as he tried to trail kisses from her jaw down to her neck.

"No distractions, we need to focus on the task at hand, be good!," Natalie said as she smiled at Ben and pushed him away lightly. 

They got up from the couch and got in the elevator to go down to the street so they could make their way to their destination. 

______________________________________________

 

Ben and Natalie arrived at the workplace and took up positions on opposite sides of the street with Nat stationed on the side of the building because she was the only one that actually knew what the guy looked like. Ben had them both cloaked in the Force, but they had to be careful since people couldn't actually see them and could run into them unknowingly. 

Nat went over to the door of the business and saw that they opened in 15 minutes. She figured that meant that they should be able to see him soon. Ben tried to test their channel again by projecting into Natalie's mind. "Can you hear me, baby?"

"I can hear you. We probably got about 10 minutes before he shows so stay alert. I might ask you to remove the cloak for a bit so I can maybe ask some questions of his coworkers if I need to."

"Ok, but that might not be a good idea today. I think we should stick with keeping the cloak for now. We are in his territory right now."

"I hear you. Let's just keep a look out for now. You know, I didn’t think about It before. There is a possibility that he drives in to work and parks in the parking garage. It's small and I could probably give it a once over really quickly. You could stay where you are and maybe just scan the minds of the people that walk into the building."

Ben didn't like that Natalie would be out of his sight, but it would probably enable them to cover more ground. "Ok, but make sure you keep our channel open please so I can keep track of you."

"I will. I'll be back in a bit. " Natalie made her way to the parking garage quickly as it was just 2 buildings down. It had 3 floors, but she could get away with using the stairs instead of the elevators. She got her cardio in for the day with the running around she did to get a once over on each floor starting at the bottom. She had just made her way up to the 3rd floor when a car came barreling around the corner moving toward her. It was him in a red and black pickup truck. 

"Nat, get out of the way! He can't see you!," Ben said in her mind while Nat was seeming to ignore him. 

Natalie continued to stand there trying to get a look at the license plate. She looked up again at the face of the man who had raped her as he continued to drive toward her. At the last moment, she moved to the driver's side of the vehicle and saw his face again in profile. 

Ben came running toward her and yelled, "What the fuck were you doing? You could have been killed!"

"I'm fine. I confirmed he works here and got his license plate number. Everything Is moving in the right direction."

"Why the hell didn't you answer me when I was talking to you? "

"I was focused on doing what we came here to do!"

"You have to communicate with me, Nat, so that if you get in trouble I can help you!"

"I'm sorry! This whole mind meld thing is new to me. I have to get used to it. I know I worried you, but we need to get back to what we came here to do!"

Ben was coming down from his freak out. "Ok, I'm sorry too, baby. I think we should get the license plate info to Twitch to see if his contacts can identify this guy. Let's take a break and catch back up with this guy at his place."

"Ok, let's go home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback of any kind will be appreciated!!


	19. The One I Can't Lose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie continue their quest to find the rapist. Ben has another nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting to get a bit angsty, but there is more to come!!

Ben and Natalie returned home from their stake out. Natalie practically ran to the kitchen for snacks. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm starved."

Ben laughed at her, but thought it was adorable as he thought most things she did were. He took a moment to run over things in his mind. He was still worried about Nat, but he felt better that they were able to establish a Force connection. She still seemed absorbed with this guy. It wasn't that he didn't understand, but she appeared to be putting this before her own safety which terrified him.

"So what time did you want to head toward his house, Ben? I think if we're there by 5:30 that should be fine accounting for traffic. We have lots of time until then. Twitch will probably get a hit on the license plate way before we get there.," Natalie said as she continued to feed her face. 

Ben moved toward Natalie slowly. "Well we could have some fun working on our Force connection." Ben gently wrapped his hand around Natalie's neck and stroked it with his thumb. He leaned in to her face and licked the snack crumbs from her lips then slowly darted his tongue into her mouth to claim it with a kiss. "Umm, you taste good.," Ben said then he went back for more. 

Natalie smiled after Ben pulled away to look in her eyes. "I do want to work on that, but can we save it till tonight? There might be some other leads we can look into and I just want to stay focused. Is that ok, babe?"

Ben was honestly disappointed, but could see her point. "Sure, it can wait. What other leads can we work now?" 

"We could check into the tax records on the address of the house. Maybe we get a hit on his name. We could check out his company's website and try to get something there. I could probably get into the hospital records to review the notes to see if there is anything buried there. That should give us a start. And I think I need to eat more than just snacks cause I'm still hungry. "

Ben laughed at Nat again and said, "Sounds like we have a lot to work on. Let's get started."

________________________________________________

 

A few hours later, both Ben and Natalie were nodding off after trying to chase their leads. Ben woke up enough to go to Natalie and put them both in bed. Natalie stirred awake sleepily and said, "I was still working." "Baby, you were sleeping just like I was. That's why we are getting in bed. We'll only sleep for a little bit. We still have hours before we need to be at his place," Ben said as he rubbed her shoulders and back to coax her back to sleep. It didn't take long before she fell back to sleep. Ben set the alarm and fell asleep himself. 

Ben drifted into a dream where he walked in just as the man who had raped Natalie had slit her throat. The man was no longer faceless as he had seen it Nat's memory from earlier in the day when they found him at work. 

Ben screamed, "No!!" The man turned to face him and Ben used the Force to snap his neck. Ben ran over to Nat to release her from her restraints. She was barely alive with blood flowing from her mouth and neck. "Ben, did you kill him?," Natalie said scratchily. 

"Yes, he's dead. Please hold on. Help is coming.," Ben said with tears freely flowing from his eyes and looking down on his lover as she is dying. 

"They can't help me, baby. I've lost too much blood. I am going to die. I'm sorry, but I had to do it. He was going to get away and I couldn't let it happen.," Natalie said as she reached a hand toward Ben's facial scar to stroke it. 

"No, you're not dying! I won't let you! You belong with me, we belong together! Just hang on!"

Natalie looked deep into his eyes with tears in her own, kissed him with her bloody lips and went limp after saying she loved him. 

"Nat, wake up! You're gonna be fine! Please don't give up on me! It's not your time now!," Ben yelled as he tried to shake Natalie awake. 

She was gone…..

Ben shouted as he awoke with tears covering his face. Nat wasn't in bed with him. He panicked and yelled her name. 

"Nat, where are you?," he said as he searched each room. "Nat, please answer me!!"

He finally found her in the other bedroom's bathroom throwing up. He breathed a huge sigh of relief and went toward her to hold her hair back. She was dry heaving. She pulled back from the toilet when she thought she was done and Ben held her in his arms. "I'm sorry, babe. I think it's the stress of the shit we are doing right now. Are you alright? Did I scare you?," Natalie said.

"I had another dream about you getting hurt. I'm ok. Let's get you out of here and get you some water, alright?" He lifted her up and placed her on the living room couch then he got her a big glass of water.  
She slowly drank the water to avoid any problems that could make her start throwing up again. 

Ben got her a cold wet cloth to wipe on her face and neck. "Are you sure you're alright? Maybe we need to get you to a doctor. It's not like it would be a hassle."

"I'll be ok. I told you that I'll go to a doctor after this is over with if it's still happening which I know it won't be. If it gets any worse, I could always get Twitch to look me over. I'm sorry I'm worrying you and stressing you out, Ben."

Ben pulled her into his arms and said, "Nonsense, I love you. Worrying about you is part of the job. It looks like we've got another hour before we need to be at his place. So why don't we get cleaned up and start on our way there."

"Ok, I love you too. I feel like I don't tell you enough, baby."

"You tell me plenty, but I never get tired of hearing it."

Natalie finished her water and they both went off to clean up before going to stake out this guy's place.


	20. The One Who Knows Your Limits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie make a discovery. Natalie breaks down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben continues to worry. Natalie continues to be obsessed.

Natalie and Ben made their way to their quarry's home. Ben had them cloaked in the Force again and their connection was open. Natalie gave the house the once over. It was pretty big and as far as they knew he lived alone. Ben was stationed at the front of the house and Natalie was stationed in the back.

"Hey, I think I should get in to the house and do some snooping.," Natalie projected into Ben's mind.

"I don't think that is such a good idea, Nat."

"There's no one home and we could find out a lot about him inside his house! You can let me know if anyone is coming. This could be the best chance we get to get up close and personal without him having to be there."

Ben didn't feel good about it, but he was there to watch Natalie's back. "Ok, just make it quick. If I tell you he is on the way, you haul ass out of there!"

"Ok, will do."

Natalie jimmied the back door lock and was able to open it. She entered the house and immediately took stock of her surroundings. Everything appeared to be well organized and clean. She made a beeline toward the front of the house. She looked for some mail or other identifying paperwork. Turned out this fucker's name was actually Richard Johnson, who would have known? She looked around for any personal items like photos. There was distinct lack of anything like that. There was a computer, but she didn't waste her time with it cause she was sure it was password protected. She wondered if he had a basement. The house was certainly big enough. She wanted to check out the bedroom first though. His bedroom barely looked lived in. She started to wonder if he actually lived here or was maybe using the house as a front. The basement was calling her so she went down to it. It reeked like the smell of dead flesh. The smell was so strong that she wondered why she didn't smell it upstairs. She looked around and saw some bones on the ground…. Human bones. 

"Nat, you've got to get out, he is home now!"

Natalie thought to herself. This could have been me. There was no way to know how many victims he's had since she was lucky enough to get away. So many lives could have been saved if she would have come forward. 

"Nat, snap out of it!! He is in the house!!"

Why had she been so lucky to get away from him? How did he come back into her life at this moment after all this time? It was a sign that this was her chance to rid the world of him once and for all. She came back to her senses and heard someone coming down into the basement. She backed up toward the basement wall and saw…. Ben?

"Are you ok? You were ignoring me again! He's unconscious upstairs. We've gotta get out of here!!"

Natalie let him drag her out of the house and she was thankful for the fresh air. They walked for a bit and Ben turned Natalie to look at him. "Nat, look at me. Nat!! This isn't going to work if you won't listen to me!! "

Natalie was calm as she replied, "I hear you, Ben. I'm sorry. He was disposing of bodies down there. I don't know if he really even lives there. He is probably just using the place as a dumping ground. We can't wait any longer. I can't let him kill anyone else. It could have been me, it should have been me!"

Ben wrapped his arms around her and said, "Stop talking like that. You lived for a reason. We're gonna fix this."

"We need to fix it tomorrow night, no more waiting."

"I'll call Twitch tonight so we can come up with a game plan. Let's get you home."

___________________________________________________

Natalie and Ben got home then he led her to the bedroom. "You rest here and I'll call Twitch."

Ben went into another room to make the phone call.

"Twitch, it's Ben. We just got back from that asshole's place. He's probably using the house as a place to dispose of bodies. We need to come up with a plan to get rid of him tomorrow night."

"Ben, my sources found a ton of shit on this guy. He's been busy racking up kills across the country. He's due to be put down. I'll come over tonight so we can work on something."

"Twitch, I need your help with Nat. I don't think it's a good idea for her to be involved anymore. She spaced out a few times when we were staking this guy out. I'm worried about her. I think we should try to convince her not to be involved, but that is easier said than done. Can I count on you?"

"Of course, Ben. I told you before that I want her kept safe so I am on board with whatever does that. Gimme a couple hours and I'll be there"

"Thank you! Goodbye."

Ben got off the phone and made his way back to the bedroom. Nat was in the same place he left her. 

"You hungry? I could warm you up something to eat, Nat."

"No, actually I may throw up again soon."

"You can take a nap if you want before Twitch shows up."

"Can you just hold me, Ben? Please?, "Natalie said as tears welled up in her eyes. Ben laid down in the bed and moved Natalie toward him so he could hold her. He stroked her hair and ran his other hand up and down her back as she sobbed. 

"It's ok, baby. I'll keep you safe. I promise."

"It's not that. I just think about all those people he's killed, all those families that won't get to see their loved ones again. I should have stopped him a long time ago."

"This is not your fault. That sick fuck will get his due tomorrow night. We'll make sure of it."

"I'm so tired. I am gonna take a nap before Twitch gets here."

Ben held her until she fell asleep.


	21. The One I May Lose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Twitch try to do an intervention. Natalie isn't having it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Twitch are understandably worried, but Natalie won't give up.

Ben got up from the living room couch to greet Twitch. 

"Hey, man. Thanks for coming."

"No problem. Where's Nat?"

"She's sleeping in the bedroom. I'm glad about that so we can talk freely. Since this whole thing's started she's been exhausted and vomiting a lot. She's under so much stress. I just don't want her in the field for this thing. I think she'll only get hurt."

"How do you plan to convince her of this, Ben? You know she's more stubborn than a mule."

"That's why I need your help. You've known her for a long time. Has she ever backed off of anything?"

"Not as long as I've known her, but why don't you just present what you told me? All the physical symptoms seem like enough evidence to me. Let's come up with a plan together and then we'll bring her in on it"

___________________________________________

Natalie thought she heard the elevator go off which means Twitch is there. She felt so sick to her stomach. She got to the toilet and vomited. She sat there for a bit before she got in the shower, brushed her teeth and dressed. She went out to the living room to talk with Ben and Twitch.

"Hi honey, you look like warmed over shit!," Twitch said as he hugged her.

"Thanks for that, asshole! You look great as always. So you guys started without me? Get me up to speed with where we are."

"Well, baby doll, we've been talking. Ben and I don't think it's a good idea for you to be involved with this anymore."

"What the fuck are you talking about?," Natalie said as she seethed.

"You are in no condition right now to follow up with this. Ben and I can handle it from here."

"Ok, so he told you that I've been sick. It's just stress. It's gonna work itself out. I'm fine."

Ben started to speak up. "Nat, you're not fine. You haven't been since you saw him at the ER. You've just been getting worse. You've spaced out in the field and this guy is too dangerous for us to let you out there with him."

"Where the fuck do you guys get off with this bullshit? This guy is my business more than either of yours and I mean to see it through!"

"We are two men that love you and don't want to see you out there trying to get yourself killed!!," Ben said.

"So because I'm a woman, I'm not qualified to make my own decisions."

"You know that has nothing to do with it. You're not a killer, Nat. Your mindset is all fucked up right now and if I let you out there like this, I'll never forgive myself if anything happens to you!!"

"So this is about you and your fucking comfort level now? I asked for your help with this and this is how you treat me? Well then, I don't need help from either of you anymore! I will kill this bastard myself like I should have done years ago!!"

"Nat, you're being unreasonable!, " Twitch said.

"Unreasonable, my ass!! Is that what you guys have been doing? Scheming on a way to shut me out!! Well I am shutting you out!! As a matter of fact, both of you get the fuck out of my house right now!!"

"Nat, you can't mean that!, " Ben said. "Please listen to reason!!"

"Tell me the plan you've been discussing without me right now so that we can kill this bastard tomorrow or keep it to yourselves and ride your fucking high horses out of here right now!!"

Twitch and Ben looked at each other and they relented. It was better to have Nat involved with their plan rather than trying to do things by herself. 

They went over the plan with Natalie and surprisingly, she thought It was a good plan. By the time they were finished, everyone was clear on their roles. 

Twitch was getting ready to leave so Natalie gave him a hug and went to the kitchen to get some water.

Ben hung back to talk with Twitch and walked him to the elevator. "Ben, I see exactly what you're talking about and I agreed to go over things with Nat to keep her from going after this guy alone. But you need to make sure that she stays out of this. Whatever you need to do."

"She'll never forgive me, Twitch."

"Yes, but she'll be alive."

With that he got on the elevator and left. 

Natalie sat on the living room couch with her water. Ben sat down beside her. 

"You know I only care about keeping you safe, right?"

"I know that Ben, but you go behind my back to my best friend to try to leverage me out of this. That was not right. You wanna keep me safe then back me up!"

"You still tired, baby?," Ben said as he trailed kisses from her jaw to her neck.

"I'm still mad at you, asshole!''

"How mad? Enough to ask me to stop?," Ben said as he switched to the other side.

"Umm, no. But I am still a bit tired. Can we take a nap before we start exploring this "connection" a bit more?"

"Ok, I'm a bit tired, too. We can sleep for a bit first. I'll meet you back there, ok?"

Natalie went back to the bedroom. Ben thought about how he was going to keep Nat away from their plans tomorrow. He was probably going to lose her after tonight, but it would be worth it to keep her out of harm's way.


	22. The One Who's Heart I Had To Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie, Ben, and Twitch make plans. One of them is gonna be the odd man out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is some smut on deck. Not sure how well I do with sex scenes so I hope it is ok. This chapter is pretty long, but needed to be for the set up.

Ben laid awake in bed with Natalie sleeping on his chest. He could feel her breath and warmth on his skin, smell her scent… He wished they could stay like this forever. He ran his hands over her hair and upper back. She stirred a little, but easily went back to sleep. He never thought he would have this and now he was going to lose it. 

He was tired, but he probably wasn't going to sleep tonight. It wouldn't be the first time he was sleep deprived before a mission. He knew he'd be able to function appropriately. 

What was he going to do without Nat in his life in this place and time? He hadn't really thought about it much until now because his goal in life was to be with her. Nothing else would make him happier.

He shouldn't feel sorry for himself. At least he had the opportunity to have Nat in his life. He'd gotten to experience true bliss after his exploits as Kylo Ren. Nat was right about the rarity of this and he could appreciate that, but he was still aware of the rarity of what they had and would soon be mourning the loss of it. 

Nat stirred awake after a few minutes. "Hey, you been awake all this time, Ben?"

"I'm fine, baby. You feel ok?"

"I can't wait to get this over with so we can move on with our lives. This has been hanging over my head for so long."

"Don't worry, everything is gonna be fine.," Ben said as he kissed her hair.

"That's just it. I'm not worried at all. With you and Twitch having my back, I know everything is fine."

Ben bristled at her statement, but also felt himself draw her in tighter. "You know anything I do is to protect you, right?" He was almost ashamed that he seemed to be making the case for himself doing what he needed to do. 

"We can protect each other. I know I haven't been the most together lately, but there is so much going on. I know I worried you and Twitch, but I really need this to be over. If we all work together, it will go quickly and the streets will be safer without him on them."

Ben didn't want to spend what was likely his last night with Nat talking about this. "Let's leave this for tomorrow. We have more important business. Our "connection," remember?" He stroked his large hands over her ass and started to kiss the scar on the right side of her face. 

"Should I be worried about this? Our sex has been pretty intense up to this point."

"Honestly, I have no idea what to expect because I have never done it before with anyone. I'm a Force connection sex virgin and I want my first time to be with you, Nat." They both laughed as they kept kissing.

"You are so wack, Ben!! I can't believe I am about to have Force enhanced sex with the corniest man I have ever met!"

Ben grinned his crooked grin widely. "I am here to entertain you in any way I need to. " He moved his lips to the divot behind her left ear. He gently sucked the spot and followed up with his tongue then he made his way down slowly. Natalie moaned and ran her fingers through his hair. 

She could feel his longing and desire for her as he continued down the trail. It was intoxicating and she had never felt anything so raw and real in her life. 

Ben felt drunk from their mingling feelings. He had never known a life without the Force, but he had also never known that the Force could make him feel like this with another person. 

It was a bizarre feedback loop where they felt what the other person was feeling and the longer it went it became more intense. The intensity increased when you did something the other person liked, but there was no comedown. It was like the best part of an orgasm building and building.

Ben had made his way down to Nat's clit and they already felt like they could jump out of their skin. Ben ran his tongue over her swollen nub and they both moaned loudly. He sucked her clit and a shiver ran through them both. He then gently ran the flat and tip of his tongue over her clit with an increasingly fast rhythm. They were both shaking with desire and raw need. Ben stopped using his tongue and sucked Natalie's clit again and they both screamed in ecstasy. Ben had come all over himself without a touch to his dick and he stayed hard. 

He made his way up to Natalie and kissed her deeply. Even their kisses became so much……more. Natalie stroked his member slowly and Ben matched her rhythm as he pumped into her hand. Natalie gently pushed Ben to lay on the bed. She put her mouth on his dick and they moaned in unison. She licked him from his balls to his tip to clean him of his previous mess. She used her hand to gently pump from the base and slowly covered his dick with her mouth. When she started to bob her head, Ben put the slightest amount of pressure on her head to let her know he was there and that he wouldn't hurt her. She licked and sucked until Ben came again in her mouth. She could feel when they were both going to come and the feeling was exquisite. He was still hard and she couldn't wait to have him inside her. 

She made her way to Ben's mouth so they could taste each other. "I need you so much, Nat. I need to be inside you," Ben projected into her mind. It was so weird because she had just had that thought. Had she thought it because he did or vice versa?

Ben kissed Nat for a little bit more before he made his way between her legs. He kissed each ankle before he lined himself up to enter her. When he did enter her, both of their eyes rolled to the backs of their heads. It was like their skin had melded together for a moment and it was electric. He folded her in half and slowly thrusted into her and she met him with equal force. They looked into each other's eyes and it almost felt that they could come just from that. They continued to fuck each other with increasing pace. Right before they came, they both tried to set themselves in each other as deeply as possible. When they orgasmed, they practically screamed into each other's mouths. "IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou," they projected into each other's minds as they were too breathless to speak out loud. They laid in each other's arms for what seemed like forever. 

Natalie was the first to break the silence. "Oh my god! What was that? If that is how sex can be with us then we can't go back to what we were doing before!!"

Natalie kissed Ben as deeply as she could because they were still breathless. They were covered in sweat and come but it felt like they could never be more comfortable. Ben finally spoke and said, "I think I could die of happiness right now. I love you so fucking much that I can't imagine being without you. " Tears came to his eyes and he immediately thought he'd said too much. 

Natalie picked up on his guilt but couldn't determine why he felt that way. "You have nothing to feel guilty about, Ben. You've done nothing but treat me like a queen. What can I do to make you feel like you've made me feel?"

Ben was still crying and said," Just don't leave me please!"

"Why would I leave you? Is this about what happened earlier with Twitch? Baby, I forgive you. You were trying to look out for me. I know that. I know you've been worried and with good reason. But it's almost over. We'll be fine as long as we work together.," Natalie said as she tried to comfort Ben with hugs and kisses.

Ben relaxed a bit, but he knew what he would need to do to keep Nat safe tomorrow. "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. That was so intense that I think I let it overwhelm me." He let Nat try to comfort him as he thought about it being the last time he could take advantage of such a thing. He just wanted to wallow in her as long as he could. 

"Let's sleep, ok. Stop worrying, Ben. We will finish this together tomorrow and we'll go on together after tomorrow.," Natalie said as she rubbed his back and shoulders to coax him to sleep. 

It took a while, but Ben finally fell asleep. Natalie was a little wired so she got up and went to watch some TV. Suddenly she realized she was starving, so she went to the kitchen to get some food. 

After 2 helpings of food, she started to get tired again, but also nauseous. She made it to the toilet to vomit and she realized that she couldn't wait for the stress to leave her so she could get back to normal. It wouldn't be too much longer though. After a while, she felt stable enough to leave the toilet so she brushed her teeth and went back to bed with Ben.  
________________________________________________

 

Ben and Natalie woke up together the following morning. Ben immediately stroked and kissed Nat's hair and face. "Good morning."

"Good morning, Ben. You feeling alright? You worried me last night."

Ben felt better, but still weighed down by his future decisions. "I'm waking up with you so it’s a good start. How's your stomach?"

"It's ok right now, but I think it's gonna blow over soon. I'm gonna try to work out a little."

"I think I might join you and then we could eat breakfast together."

"Sounds good."

They made their way down to the gym after they both drank a large glass of water. They ran around the track to break a sweat and then they both went to weight stations. After they worked out for about 2 hours, they came back upstairs to eat together. 

Natalie made them a breakfast feast, much like what she did the morning after they first met. The similarity wasn't lost on Ben and he tried to move on from the way it was making him feel. 

"We've got a lot of time before tonight. Is there anything in particular you want to do, Ben?"

"I just want to spend as much time with you as I can. That's all I care about."

"Honestly, I just want to laze around in bed for a while. I'm still drained and I need to keep my energy up for tonight. You want to join me?"

"Sure."

They finished up breakfast, cleaned up and made their way back to bed.

Ben held Natalie in his arms from behind, partly to make sure she couldn't see his guilty face. 

"You know, I think I should take a leave of absence from work for a while. I think you had a good idea about going to see my family. I think they would love you. They would probably get on me about the age difference thing, but when they see us together it will blow over."

"I would love to meet your family. From what you've told me, I think it would be fine. I want to see you as a mom and grandmother.," Ben said knowing he was being honest, but thinking it may never happen after tonight.

"I don't know if I like you thinking of me as a grandmother. It makes me feel less sexy."

"You couldn't be more sexy to me, Nat.," Ben said as he nipped and kissed the back of her neck.

"Thank you for saying that and I know you mean it right now."

"I'll mean it for the rest of my life. When our hair goes gray, when we get wrinkled, when we can't move because of arthritis, I will always find you sexy. Does that mean I'll be able to do anything about it? That is another story."

"You really think you could only be with me for the rest of your life, Ben? You don't want to be out there sowing your wild oats until you decide to settle down?"

"I want to sow my oats with you and you only. I don't need anyone else. Even if we aren't together, I don't see myself with anyone else. I want to settle down with you."

"How did I get so lucky that the Force gifted me with you? What makes me so special?"

"I don't know, but I thank the Force everyday for you.," Ben said as he kissed her hair, neck and shoulders. 

"I'm so tempted, baby," Natalie purrs. "I am wiped out though. Can we just lay here like this? I like it and I think I will be asleep soon. We'll have plenty of time to defile each other after tonight."

Ben knew that was probably not true, but he felt like he would rather just hold her anyway. "I'll give you a massage until you fall asleep and then I'll hold you until we wake up, ok?"

"That sounds wonderful, I love you."

"I love you, too," Ben said as he stole more kisses to her hair, neck, and shoulders before moving his hands to her shoulders and back.

"You have such good hands. How did you learn to do this?"

"Nowhere really. You inspire me and you're so responsive when I do it."

Natalie purred again. Ben smiled and relished her reactions. As promised, he continued until she fell asleep. He kissed her hair, neck, and shoulders again and said "I love you, baby," before he fell asleep.

_______________________________________________

 

Natalie woke up after a few hours sick to her stomach. She bolted to the bathroom and Ben startled awake. She made it to the toilet just in time. Ben got up from the bed to hold her hair and check on her. This vomiting session was longer than before and she remembered that she ate quite a bit for breakfast. After she was sure she was done, Ben helped her up so she could go to the kitchen for some water. 

Ben was really worried about her. "I really want you to go to the doctor, Nat. Something has got to be wrong. This doesn't seem normal even for the amount of stress you're under."

"I know you're scared for me, baby. But please just let me handle this business first and I'll go to the doctor as soon as I can. It won't be hard to get an appointment cause I know a bunch of internists. We talked about this already."

She sat on the couch and drank her water slowly while Ben rubbed her back. She finished the water and Ben brought her more. 

"Thanks for the water, baby. I feel a lot better. I think we should get cleaned up so we can start on our way."

They each went to separate bathrooms to start getting ready. 

About 30 minutes later, Ben and Natalie met back at the living room couch. 

"Ok, this is it. Are you ready, Ben?"

Ben wasn't ready for what was coming. "Can I just make sure our connection is stable before we go?"

"Yes, of course. I know it's taken me a bit to get used to it, but I promise I will respond more quickly this time."

"I love you, baby," Ben projected into Natalie's mind.

"I love you, too." Natalie projected to Ben.

"I'm sorry for this, Nat."

Ben wrapped one arm around Natalie and used the other to use the Force to steal her consciousness. Natalie fell into Ben's arms and he held her for a few minutes. He kissed her hair and face before he placed her on the couch. "I had to do this to protect you." He took one last look at her before he left the house to meet Twitch and get rid of Natalie's rapist once and for all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry (not sorry) for the cliffhanger. I post pretty quick so you won't have to wait long!!


	23. The One I Risked It All To Save

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Twitch handle Johnson. Natalie has her say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Force violence and lots of tense dialogue.

Ben met Twitch and his team at Johnson's house. They waited about 30 minutes for Johnson to show up. When he showed, Ben told Twitch he would handle it himself. Twitch asked if he was sure he could handle it and Ben assured him that he could and would then he'd call on Twitch and his team to help with the cleanup. Ben still had Nat on his mind, but that wouldn't interfere with this. He knew how to kill and he didn't have any issue at all with this one except what he may have given up to do it.

Ben cloaked himself with the Force and entered Johnson's home. He found him in his bedroom preparing for bed. Ben lifted the cloak and began to Force choke Johnson. Johnson was, of course, surprised. "Who the fuck are you?," Johnson croaked. 

"No one important. Have a seat so we can talk.," Ben said using a mind trick to direct Johnson.

Johnson sat on his bed and Ben released the choke. "How many women have you raped and killed?," Ben said.

"I raped and killed 62, but I didn't kill one of the women. She managed to get away from me when I got distracted with something. I learned my lesson after that."

"Aren't you clever? Do you still have any victims out there that you have yet to dispose of ?"

"I have some irons in the fire, but no one has been prepared yet."

"That's good, Johnson. Do you have a family or anyone who would come looking for you?"

"No family, no friends. I am a loner."

"How many bodies do you have buried in your house, Johnson?

"Just 3. Once I moved here, it was just easier than trying to find a spot. The basement was appropriate for now."

"Do you have any medical conditions I should know about, Johnson?"

"I have high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and coronary artery disease. The doctors tell me I should quit smoking too before I end up with permanent lung disease."

"Can you get your cigarettes and lighter out for me, please?"

Johnson got up from the bed due to Ben's suggestion and returned with the items requested. 

"Sit down on the bed again."

Johnson sat on the bed as he was asked. "This is for the one who got away.," Ben said as he pushed into Johnson's mind with the Force to make him feel the torture, fear, and anguish that his victims likely felt until he killed them. Johnson screamed in horror and Ben didn't relent. It went on for minutes until Johnson died of likely heart attack or stroke. Ben left him on the bed and walked out the house to let Twitch know that the deed was done. 

Natalie stirred awake on the couch in her house. The last thing she remembered was Ben holding her after they traded I love yous and saying that he was sorry. She looked at the clock and realized she had been out for a few hours. She sprang up and got into the elevator to go to Johnson's house.

 

_____________________________________________

 

Ben and Twitch were inside Johnson's house discussing Ben's plan to make it look like Johnson died while he was smoking and that his house would catch fire. That would make it unnecessary to dispose of his body and it would be discovered that he died of heart attack or stroke on autopsy if it came to that. Ben suddenly realized that they had a visitor….Nat.

Ben and Twitch made their way downstairs. Nat was quietly arguing with a member of Twitch's security to let her in to the house. The guy was going to grab her and Twitch stopped him to let her in the house.

"I want to see the body!," Nat said after Twitch closed the door behind her. Ben could feel her hurt rolling off of her.

Ben lead her upstairs and Twitch followed behind them. They made their way into the bedroom. Natalie looked at Johnson's dead body. Ben and Twitch silently observed her. She looked as if she was reliving some horrors, but she held it together. "You made sure he didn't have any more victims, right?," Natalie said.

"Yes and he had no one in his life that will come looking for him. I'll make it look like he died while smoking. The autopsy will show he died of a heart attack or stroke.," Ben answered.

"Thank you both. I have to leave now.," Natalie said and she turned to leave the bedroom and go downstairs. 

Ben and Twitch followed her hurriedly. "You need someone to make sure you get home ok, honey!," Twitch said.

"I made it ok before I had either one of you in my life and I will do just fine alone now!," Natalie said as she stood in the area just away from the stairs.

"You don't mean that, Nat!," Ben said knowing full well she meant it.

"You guys were right. I was fucked in the head over this and I would have probably been a liability. But I can't forgive the fact that my best friend and the love of my life conspired to keep this kind of secret from me. Not right now. I need some time and even then I don’t know if I will ever forgive either of you. "

"Please just let me take you home, Nat.," Ben pleaded.

"I can get myself to my home. You don't have a home with me anymore. I'm sure you and Twitch will be very happy together!, " Natalie said as she left the house.

Ben and Twitch stood there reeling after what just happened with Natalie for a moment. Ben gathered himself and said, "Twitch, I'm gonna finish this. Can you wait outside for me?"

Twitch left the house and Ben went upstairs to light a cigarette and place it in Johnson's dead fingers. He held the lighter to the cigarette so that it would burn faster. He waited until Johnson's hand started to burn and the flame licked at his clothing before leaving the house. He met Twitch outside in the back of the house. Ben quickly scanned the area to make sure that no one was paying attention to what they were doing. When he was satisfied that they were safe, he prompted Twitch to leave. They both got in the SUV with his security team. 

"I will find you a place to stay, Ben. Don't worry it won't be a shithole in the least.," Twitch said.

"Thank you, Twitch. I'm sure wherever you put me will be fine. I need to ask for your help though."

"Name it."

"Nat said she can't forgive us right now so there's still a chance for us."

"So what do you need my help with?"

"I want your help to get her back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's getting angsty. I went back and forth with whether or not I would give Ben an easier path back to Natalie. I think I chose right, but if you disagree, please let me know!


	24. The One Who's Honor I Want to Protect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie miss each other while they fight for each other. Natalie needs help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More angst and a doctor who needs his ass kicked.

Natalie made it back home ok from Johnson's house, although she was sure that one of Twitch's minions had followed her and did a poor job of hiding himself. She was sick to her stomach. She thought this was going to be over with by now. She was able to get herself to the bathroom before she vomited. If she was honest, she was noticeably losing some weight now. She wasn't gaunt, but her clothes felt a little looser now. And the headaches were still a problem. She'd need to see a doctor within the week. 

She didn't want to think about what happened with Ben and Twitch anymore, but it couldn't be helped. She was probably gonna be off the streets for a while which meant she didn't have an excuse to call Twitch. But Ben was another story entirely. She wished she could turn back the clock and not allowed him to make a Force connection with her. Even now, she thought she could feel him inside her head and he could feel her in his. She was still gonna have to deal with him at work, but she never had issues with being a professional. She would never ask him to quit just because they weren't together anymore. He had a right to keep his job if he wanted. 

She went to the kitchen to get some water and laid on the couch before turning on the TV. She really missed Ben.

___________________________________________________

 

Ben was impressed with the digs that Twitch had arranged for him. Apparently some client of his owed him a favor which resulted in Ben's access to this apartment that he could stay in as long as he needed and some higher end clothes that were perfect for his body. After tonight, he considered Twitch a real friend and he thought Twitch felt the same for him. 

His thoughts were always on Nat. Even though the monster that had raped her was dead, he could feel that she was still not feeling well. He hoped that she would take care of herself and get to a doctor. He knew that she was upset with he and Twitch, but he could feel that she was conflicted about it. He'd respect her wishes and give her some space. It would be difficult at work though.

He already decided that he would quit his job if she asked him to, but somehow he knew that she wouldn't ask him to do that. She prided herself on being professional and she would just deal with his presence because they both had their own jobs to do. 

After he finished admiring the apartment, he grabbed some food and turned on the TV. He sat on the massive couch to eat his food alone. He really missed Nat.

____________________________________________________

Natalie was grateful for the fast pacing at work so she could take her mind off her problems. She'd already sewed up few people's faces and referred others for surgical intervention. She had to call down the neurosurgical attending for her next case. Neal Pearce, MD was a jackass, but he was also brilliant at what he did. They had a little history. He had taken a liking to her and asked her out on a coffee date years ago. She wasn't really looking seriously for anyone at the time and she liked intelligent men. Neal never showed up and barely apologized for standing her up. Since then, she was uninterested in his advances. Unfortunately, his advances had crossed the line into sexual harassment. She never reported him because she knew if he ever actually did anything serious, she would kick his ass. She loved her job and she knew his type of acumen for the specialty would not come around again at this hospital. She avoided calling him at all costs, but this time his expertise was necessary. 

Ben was busy in the ER as well with transporting patients and assisting providers with their needs. He always kept track of Nat when he could. Some doctor that thought he was hot shit was talking to her now. Ben could feel her contempt for the man accompanied by her respect for his skills. He decided to hang around to make sure Nat would be ok even though she probably didn't need him for this. 

"Dr. Pearce, would you like to actually see the patient? I sent you all the pertinent information and I thought you might want to do your own exam to confirm my physical findings."

"Oh no, baby. I know you do great work. One of these days, you'll let me take you out so I can do some work on you.," Neal said as he rubbed her shoulder.

Ben clinched his fists at his sides. This fucking guy was gonna get his ass beat if he wasn't careful.

"Dr. Pearce, let's focus on the patient.," Natalie said as she moved his hand from her shoulder.

"My focus is excellent as you know already. Why don't you let me take you out tonight so I can show you what it's like when I'm totally focused on you?," Neal said as he moved a hand to her ass.

Ben clinched his fists to his sides even tighter and growled, "Don't talk to her like that and don't touch her, man!"

Neal said, "Who's the new guy? She's too good for you. Why would she date an orderly when she's got a real man right in front of her?," as he squeezed her ass tighter.

Natalie had had enough and Neal had insulted Ben. She grabbed Neal's left hand by the wrist and twisted it while taking her other hand and grabbing him by the junk. Natalie whispered, "Listen Dr. Pearce, get your ass in the exam room to see the patient and get out of my ER. If you ever try this shit again, I will break your arm and rip your dick off. Then we'll see how good your focus is!!"

Neal got up when Natalie released him to go see his patient. Ben smirked at him when he left as he was the only one who saw and heard how Nat put him in his place. 

"I'm sorry you had to see that. He's been an asshole to me for years and I kept myself under control because I like to keep things professional. He's an asset to the hospital even though he didn't show it. He had no right to insult you. Honestly, I might have let it go if it didn't seem like you were about to kick his ass. You would have been fired if you did that."

"Thank you for saving me from getting fired. I think it would have been worth it though.," Ben said as he smiled.

"You're welcome, Ben," Natalie said as she smiled back. 

They went their separate ways to get back to work. Ben saw Dr. Pearce come out of the exam room and walk toward the stairs to leave the ER. He used the Force to move a small waste basket into the doctor's path and he tripped but didn't fall. Dr. Pearce looked around to see Ben's laughing face and then made his way to the stairs. 

_________________________________________________________

Ben asked Twitch to meet him at lunch so they could go shopping for a gift for Nat. He knew he wouldn't be able to give it to her right away, but he would feel better if he had it for when he needed it.  
Another favor from one of Twitch's clients was responsible for this one. 

"Do you think she'll like it, Twitch?"

"I think she'll love it if the reality ever comes when she decides to forgive the both of us."

"I think that day is closer than you think. She still loves us. She is just really mad right now. We just have to be ready when the time comes."

_________________________________________________________

 

Natalie got home from work and ran to the bathroom to throw up. It had been a long day and she wanted to come home and sleep forever. She had work the next day however, but she had planned to go to a doctor's appointment on her lunch break. The vomiting seemed to be getting worse and she was having a hard time keeping anything down. At this rate, she wasn't going to have any energy to work tomorrow. She decided to call a friend to cover her shift tomorrow. They didn't have a problem covering the next couple days if she needed it so she took them up on it. She probably needed the extra rest. 

She threw up 3 more times before she could drink a glass of water without gagging. She wanted to finish one more glass of water before she tried to go to bed. She had taken to sleeping in her own room since Ben was gone. She couldn't sleep as well, but she was just as exhausted as before. She ran to the bathroom one more time to vomit before she tried going to bed. She decided to leave the last large glass of water at her bedside table instead of trying to drink it and just ending up throwing it up anyway. After a few minutes, she drifted off to sleep.

_________________________________________________________

Natalie woke up the next morning with a really dry mouth and she felt really dizzy. She tried to reach the glass of water she left on the bedside table, but it was farther than she really wanted to reach. She physically got up out of bed to get the water and immediately regretted it because she fell to the floor. She was so weak that when she tried to get up, she fell back to the floor and passed out.


	25. The One Who Makes Me So Happy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie's in trouble, so Ben and Twitch come to the rescue. Surprises are in store.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've been following the story, you're probably not surprised!!

Ben was hard at work, but his thoughts always drifted to Nat. Their interaction yesterday was encouraging and it gave him hope that they could get back together. He hadn't seen her yet today and he assumed she was really busy just like the previous day. He tried to hang around the ER nursing desk to see if he would run into her when he had small breaks in action.

A female doctor stopped by the nursing desk to ask for Natalie. "I'm looking for Natalie Granderson, she's a PA that is working here."

"She is normally here at this time, but she called out for the next two days and got someone else to cover her shifts.," said the receptionist.

"I wanted to let her know I wouldn't be able to make our appointment today. I tried calling her, but I didn't get an answer so I left a message. I guess that will have to do, thank you.," said the doctor. 

Ben heard their exchange and immediately began to worry. He called Nat at home and got no answer. He called her cell phone and still no answer. He called Twitch while he was walking out of the building. 

"Twitch, can you get to Nat's as soon as possible? I think she's in trouble."

"Be there in 15 minutes, Ben."

Ben started running for Nat's house. Luckily, she hadn't changed any of her codes to get in. The elevator ride to the top seemed to take forever. He bolted into the house once the elevator opened. "Nat! Nat!" It was eerily quiet in the house. She wasn't in their bed or their bathroom. He found her in her old bedroom passed out on the floor. "Nat, wake up! Baby, get up!" Natalie stirred a little but her eyes stayed closed. Ben picked her up and took her to the hospital bed in the clinic area. He knew Twitch was on his way, but he had to call him and update him on the situation. 

"Twitch, she was passed out in her bedroom. She could have been there all night!!"

"Relax, Ben. I am coming up in the elevator now."

"Ok, I brought her to the bed in the clinic."

Ben was really upset with himself. He blamed himself for not insisting she went to a doctor sooner. 

Twitch got out of the elevator and made a beeline for the clinic. 

"Do you know what happened, Ben?," Twitch said as he grabbed the equipment he needed to get her vital signs.

"I think her vomiting must have gotten worse and she got weak. Are you gonna be able to handle this or should we take her to the hospital?"

"Honey, this is what I do for my business. I've got this, but I need you to step outside so I can work on her, ok? I will update you as soon as I can."

"Please, Twitch. Help her." Ben said as he went out to the couch to wait. 

__________________________________________________

 

Twitch came out of the clinic after 30 minutes and it seemed a lifetime had passed. 

"I've gotten some IV fluids started, I gave her a medication to keep her from vomiting, I placed a catheter to collect her urine, and I got some blood work that is running on the machines now. She was really dehydrated just based on the physical exam and vital signs. I'll know more when I get some test results back. She's still asleep, but she'll wake up later once she gets more fluids in her. I think she's gonna be ok. You can go and sit with her until she wakes up, Ben. Try not to worry."

Ben was calmed by Twitch's words and presence, but he was still worried and he felt so guilty for not being here for her. He went into the clinic and sat next to her bed. She looked so small and frail. He just wanted to gather her up in his arms and keep her safe. He hoped that she would wake up soon. That would make him feel a lot better.

_____________________________________________________

 

Natalie stirred awake to find Ben's head in her lap presumably sleeping. She reached her hand to touch his raven hair and ran it through a few times. Mostly to remind herself that he was real. "Ben?," she croaked. "Ben!," she croaked a little louder. Ben finally awoke and looked up to see Nat looking down on him with her hand in his hair. 

"Hey, are you ok? Twitch, she's awake!," Ben said. "I'm sorry I fell asleep on you. I was worried and I just drifted off."

"It's ok, I'm glad you’re here. Did you find me?"

"Yes. You scared the shit out of me. The doctor you had an appointment with came to the ER to tell you she wasn't gonna make your appointment and she said you didn't answer your phone. The receptionist told her you had called out for the next two days. I tried to call you a few times and you didn't answer so I came looking for you. You were on the floor passed out and I called Twitch to help. "

"Thank you. I seem to be saying that to you a lot recently. I missed you. It hasn't been long, but I missed you so much. I don't want to waste anymore time. Please come home to me.," Natalie said as tears came to her eyes. 

Ben was about to respond when Twitch came into the room. "Hey darling, welcome back to the land of the living. You nauseous at all?"

"Not right now. What did your tests find, Twitch?"

"Well I feel confident in saying that the problem is….hyperemesis gravidarum."

Natalie looked at Ben then back at Twitch, back at Ben then back at Twitch. "Twitch, that isn't fucking funny! You know my medical history and that is impossible! Plus I feel like the hottest of hot garbage!," Natalie said with her hoarse voice. 

"Afraid not, sugar. I double and triple checked the tests and cause I knew you were gonna be ornery, I am already running the hormone testing. I will let you know what comes of it. I'll give you two lovebirds some time alone. Call me if you need me."

"What does all that mean, Nat?," Ben said.

Nat took a few breaths before speaking. "I don't know how this happened, but it appears that I am pregnant." Ben stared at her, but said nothing. "And it appears that it is more than a single pregnancy, based on the symptoms I've been having. I was never this sick when I had my daughter." Ben was still staring at her. "Ben, I'm sorry,"-- Ben cut her off with a deep kiss. He pulled back briefly and Natalie started talking again. "Ben, do you understand what I'm,"--- Ben cut her off again with another deep kiss. "Ben!"

"Yes! I heard you. We're having twins and I am expressing my happiness by kissing you. What's wrong with that?"

"What's wrong with that?! First off, I wasn't supposed to be able to get pregnant. Second, we just broke up a few days ago. Third, we have only been together about 6 weeks, Fourth, I'm pretty sure my mouth taste like ass-----" Ben cut her off again with a kiss.

They pulled away from each other and this time Ben spoke. "First, it doesn't matter that you weren't supposed to get pregnant. The Force wants this. Second, I don't accept that you broke up with me so we are still together. Third, if we had only met yesterday I would still want to love you for the rest of our lives. Fourth, I don't care how your mouth tastes cause I want to kiss you all the time. " 

Ben pulled a jewelry box out of his pocket and got down on one knee. "I got this yesterday and I thought it was gonna be awhile before I gave it to you. But now is the---"

"Yes.," Natalie said.

Ben was deliriously happy, but only slightly annoyed. "You're supposed to let me finish!"

"Ok, I'm sorry. Please continue, Ben."

"Natalie Granderson, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

"Yes, Ben, I will." They kissed again after he placed the ring on her ring finger and then rested their foreheads against each other. 

"Ben, I need to say something to you."

"Ok."

"If you ever use the Force to knock me out again, I'll kill you in your sleep.," Natalie said as she smiled but was dead serious.

"That's totally fair, Nat.," Ben said calmly as he grinned his crooked grin and went in for another passionate kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course, it's twins!! The Force wants it!!


	26. The One Who Is My Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben dotes on Natalie. Natalie is worried about the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our lovebirds are getting more domestic and talking about the future. Lots of angst is coming. Sorry the chapter is really dialogue heavy.

Ben had been able to keep Natalie in bed for 3 days. He served her hand and foot, he got her to the bathroom, and he gave her massages. Nat did love it, but now she was going stir crazy. Ben didn’t blame her. After Starkiller, he caused the medical staff many problems after he came out of the bacta tank. He might have killed a staff member or two. 

Nat insisted that Twitch come over to check her out so Ben could ease her "restrictions." He examined her in the clinic.

"Twitch, I'm sure I can at least get out of bed on my own now! I promise I won't "physically exert" myself for the rest of the week."

"I agree you can get out of bed on your own now. What do you consider "physical exertion"? I saw those marks all over your body, Nat. I didn't know you and Ben were into kinky shit!"

"I refuse to be lectured by the likes of you on kinky shit, Twitch! If you must know, there has been no intercourse since before I passed out. Ben has been treating me with kid gloves since then. He has taken excellent care of me, but I can't take being in bed all day."

"Ok, love. You can get out of bed on your own. I think you and lover boy are fine to engage in some activities, but no bloodletting or excessive sweating. I still don't want you working out for another week. Have you been nauseous anymore?"

"Some, but no vomiting. I can keep food down now. I've been eating 3 meals a day plus snacks. I've been drinking 8 or more glasses of water a day. My bowels are regular. I've actually been sleeping quite a bit. Were you able to determine about how far along I am with your tests?"

"My best guess is about 5 weeks, but I think we should do an ultrasound in 2 weeks so we can try to firm up things. I can follow you until you give birth if you like. There might be lots of questions if you go to a regular OB. You gonna tell me how a woman who's gone through menopause ends up pregnant?"

"I'd be lying if I said I understood it, Twitch. You'd have to talk to Ben, but I'm not sure you'd understand anymore after that conversation. For now, let's just call it a miracle, ok?"

"No self respecting person in medicine can discount a miracle. You know if you need anything you can call me, honey. I've gotta go.," Twitch said as he kissed Nat's cheek.

They exited the clinic together. Ben was waiting on the couch. 

"Everything ok, Twitch?," Ben said. 

"I eased her restrictions, but I still don't want her working out for another week, sweating excessively, or losing any blood. Ok, Dracula?," Twitch said.

Ben was slightly embarrassed, but not ashamed by that comment. "I promise I won't suck any of her blood, Twitch! Thank you for taking care of my family." Ben gave Twitch a bear hug and made sure not to squeeze his thin frame too tight. 

"You're welcome, Ben. They're my family, too. Call me if you guys need me.," Twitch said before he got in the elevator to leave.

Ben grabbed Natalie in his arms and got them to the living room couch. "You hungry, thirsty, need anything?," Ben said.

"I'm a little tired. Can we go to bed for a bit?"

"Anything for you, baby.," Ben grabbed her in his arms again and took her to their bedroom. He gently placed her in the bed and then went to the kitchen to grab her a large glass of water to sit on the bedside table until she was ready for it.

"Ben, did you ever talk to your supervisor? You left work the other day and never came back after you found me."

"I did. Everything's fine."

"You did your mindfuckery on her, didn't you?"

"I'll have you know, it's called a mind trick and yes, I did use one on her. The only one who's mind I want to fuck is yours, Nat."

"Good to see you haven't lost your corniness through all this, baby. You're not in the habit of doing mind tricks on your co-workers, are you?"

"No, I promised you I wouldn't. I did use the Force to move a wastebasket in front of that asshole Pearce though to make him trip that day he harassed you. You know, if that piece of shit ever puts his hands on you again, I'm gonna yank his tongue out through his asshole!"

"That's quite graphic, baby. He is really harmless and I think he learned his lesson. Listen, I think we should tell human resources that we are together. We're engaged now and I know you don't like hiding that we're together when we're at work. The problem is they'll want to put us on different shifts now. How do you feel about that?"

"I want to keep things as they are. It is hard not to touch you and talk to you at work, but I don't want to be separate from you and I want us to be off at the same time so we can be together then."

"Ok, things can stay how they are at work, but I am going to start to get fat with your monster Force babies and I'll be wearing your ring. People are going to start to ask questions."

"Monster Force babies? How dare you refer to the fruit of my loins like that, baby?," Ben says sarcastically while he kisses her hair, neck, and shoulders.

"That was harsh, but baby you're huge! If your children are anything like you, that does not bode well for my lady parts. After I have these babies, I will be fat, old, and my uterus will be hanging on by a thread!"

Ben stopped his ministrations and got in front on Natalie to look in her eyes. "You know I love you for more than your body, right? You are my match in every way. You accept me for who and what I am. I refuse to be without you no matter how much you weigh, how old you are, or what state your uterus is in. Even if you weren't about to give me these children, I would always be here for you."

"Ben, I love you for saying that and I love your naiveté when it comes to relationships. I wish I had the faith that you have in us."

"I have enough for all of us. "

Ben moved back to his position behind Natalie to rub her shoulders, neck, and back. Natalie eventually fell asleep and Ben went to sleep not long after. 

_____________________________________________

Natalie woke up a few hours later still in Ben's arms. She was a little nauseous, but didn't need to run to the bathroom. She got up from the bed to go to the kitchen and get some crackers to ease her stomach.  
She sat down at the kitchen table to slowly chew on the crackers and she started to think about everything leading up to this point. She was deliriously happy with Ben even though the craziness that came before was barely to be believed. She tended to be a pessimistic realist, that way if the worst happened she wouldn’t be surprised. She couldn't put her finger on it. She just knew that something was coming, something bad. If she talked with Ben about it, he would probably just say that the Force hasn’t revealed anything to him and that she was just being paranoid. Maybe she was, but her instincts had served her well before and she knew that would continue as long as she listened to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love writing the relationships in this fic. Let me know how I'm doing please!!


	27. The One Who Everyone Is Waiting For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A trip back to a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Checking in with the First Order and the Resistance. Everybody wants to know--where is Kylo Ren?

General Hux was in his office when Phasma alerted him to her presence outside the door. "Enter."

"Sir, I was just checking in to see if you've heard anything about Kylo Ren recently. I just find it a bit odd that no one has heard anything from him in 3 months. Supreme Leader Snoke hasn't given you a clue what is going on?"

"Phasma, I was shut down when I tried to ask anything more. I was also told that we should be expecting another Knight of Ren at some point, but that was months ago. And quite frankly, I don't think I could tolerate the disruptions that another Knight would bring to the ship. I appreciate your worry for Kylo Ren, but in this instance, I think we would be best served if we simply moved on from him."

"Sir, I know you like to play things close to the vest, but I've known you for a long time and I consider you a friend. I should hope you consider me a friend as well. "

"Of course, you are the closest person to a friend I have, Phasma."

"Then level with me as a friend would. Why is the Supreme Leader all of a sudden essentially giving up on the First Order's fight against the Resistance and seemingly unconcerned when the Master of the Knights of Ren just disappears into thin air?"

Hux could sense the same building frustration in Phasma that he had with the Supreme Leader's leadership. "The quick and dirty answer is I have no idea. He has chosen not to share that information with me, but I get the feeling he is waiting for something specific to happen."

"What should the First Order do while he is waiting, sir? We lost a lot on Starkiller. I don't think I am telling you anything you don't already know, but the troops and officers are restless. We haven't hit back on our enemy and what does that say about us? It shows the enemy that we are weak and I am not weak. I think that those same restless people would agree with me."

"Are you telling me that we have traitorous people on board who would revolt against the Supreme Leader, Phasma?"

"I'm telling you that you have a situation that could blow up in your face if you don't get ahead of it, sir."

Hux took Phasma's words to heart. "Phasma, I appreciate the concerns that you have shared and I promise you that I only have the First Order's interest in mind. Should any pertinent details need to be discussed again, I will contact you directly."

"Thank you, sir.," Phasma said as she proceeded to leave the general's office.

Hux didn't think it was the right time to try to move against the Supreme Leader, but he could appreciate Phasma's point about the crew. If his crew felt this way, you could bet the rest of the First Order agreed. He needed to make sure that when the time came, he would have the First Order solidly behind him for support. It would have made it easier if he knew where Kylo Ren's loyalties would lie.

______________________________________________________

 

General Leia Organa and the rest of the Resistance had been alerted to the upcoming return of the Millennium Falcon which was carrying not only Rey, Chewie, and R2-D2, but her wayward brother Luke. Leia was overjoyed when she had heard this news as she had missed him terribly, even more since Han died at the hands of her son.

The Falcon was seen coming from the distance and everyone was preparing for it's arrival. The ship landed on the landing pad and all the occupants offloaded. Leia quickly walked as fast as her aging legs could carry her toward her brother who was moving as fast paced. They hugged each other and they could feel the large presence of Chewbacca around them as well. The hug was brief, not because they couldn't go on expressing their love for each other, but because they needed to have a discussion about things that have happened and things to come. 

Rey had her reunion with Finn and her reintroduction to Poe and the rest of the Resistance. But her mind was on other things just like her master and his twin.

 

After settling in on the base, Rey, Leia, and Luke got together for a talk. 

"Leia, I have sensed that Ben has embraced the light more over these last few months and that he seems more content."

"I have sensed the same, but I have also sensed that there is someone in his life he cares for deeply that is responsible for his change of heart."

"Not just one someone.," Rey chimed in. "There are multiple persons that have spurred this on. I have sensed two dim, but growing stronger lights in the Force as well."

"So, I'm to be a grandmother then. We have all sensed this, but where is he now? All our sources say that Kylo Ren has not been seen or heard from in months. What does it mean, Luke?"

"I think it means that when Ben comes back that we will have an ally to fight against Snoke. But the other question is what Snoke is up to?" 

"Our sources in the First Order tell us that there are no current assaults planned against us, which makes no sense after what they lost at Starkiller. It's as if Snoke could care less about it."

"When I was fighting Ben, I could hear Snoke speaking to me in my mind. I've heard no such thing since Starkiller. I think that has to mean that his plans have changed whatever they are."

"That puts us at a disadvantage right now, not knowing what his new plans are. The only way we might be able to figure these things out is if Ben chooses to resurface. I also sense that he is far away and not interested in this fight anymore. If he chooses not to return, I fear the galaxy could be in serious trouble.," Luke says.

 

___________________________________________________

 

Supreme Leader Snoke spends his days enjoying his wealth and possessions. He is no longer interested in his previous plans to find the last Jedi or crush the Resistance. Such things don't matter any longer.

He always has many plans in action at once and he has learned to do this after his many years of life. Kylo Ren has always been a linchpin in all of his plans. That is why he never cared much when he had failed objectives that had been set forth for him. 

Snoke knows that the Resistance and the First Order are plotting his demise and could care less. Kylo Ren will give him what he has been waiting for very soon and the Snoke's plans will come to fruition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know what you guys are thinking and it won't be that simple. There are going to be lots of twists and turns to come!!


	28. The One I Can't Live Without

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie has a medical emergency and somehow Snoke is involved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course Snoke found some way to reinsert himself into Ben's life. What does Snoke want and how far will Ben go to give it to him if it means he can save his family?

Ben and Natalie just got home from food shopping. They decided it was time to start trying to cook at home more often instead of takeout all the time. They had time to get good at cooking before the babies came. Hopefully, no one would end up with food poisoning.

They were both putting groceries away and Natalie said she didn't feel so good so she went to the bathroom. "I'll finish up while you're gone, baby. I'll leave some crackers and water out for you."

Natalie felt really weird. She was sick to her stomach and she had a headache, but this time was unusual. She got to the toilet and threw up like she usually did, but something was still off. She went back to the kitchen table and started eating crackers and drinking water. 

"You ok?," Ben said.

"Ok, I guess. I just feel funny."

"You need to go lay down. I'll go with you if you want."

"Ok, can we go now please?"

"Do I need to call Twitch? You having any cramps or any pain at all?"

"No, I think I'll be fine if I just lay down." Ben picked her up in his arms and took her to bed. He laid behind her and massaged her neck, back , and shoulders. She seemed to relax quickly and went to sleep. Ben was worried and thought he should call Twitch as a precaution, but he thought better of it. He laid there and thought for a moment if there were any serious issues Twitch had told them to look out for at the 3 month mark. Nothing came to mind. He was tired himself, but needed to go to the bathroom to relieve himself.

When he came back from the bathroom, he found Nat in bed having what looked like a seizure. Her body was shaking all over. He called out to her, but her eyes remained closed. She finally stopped shaking, but he had no idea how long it lasted because he had left the room. 

He went over to her, scared as fuck and crying, and touched her face to try to arouse her. "Nat, baby, wake up!"

Suddenly, Nat's eyes opened and a familiar voice emanated from Nat's mouth. "Kylo Ren, it's good to see you again."

It was Snoke! "Get out of her mind, Snoke!! This is between you and me! Leave her alone!"

"I have no intention of hurting your love or your children, Kylo. Did you forget your training is incomplete? Did you forget your vow to find the last Jedi?"

"Tell me what you want and I'll give it to you, but leave them out of this!"

"Kylo, I want nothing more than to help you. I am like a father to you. You killed your real father, remember? I simply wanted to see how you were doing and it seems you have done very well for yourself. I'm not upset with you. Like a real father would, I am offering you my help in anyway you would like to take it. I mean you or your family no harm. Call on me when you need. Goodbye, Kylo."

Snoke left Natalie's mind, but she still didn't wake up. Ben could see that she was breathing. He got on the phone and called Twitch. "Twitch, it's Ben. Nat just had a seizure. It looks like she's ok now, but can you come over please?"

"Ben, there could be a lot of things going on with her. I think Nat would agree to go to the hospital. Hang up with me and dial 911. I'll meet you at the hospital."

Ben followed Twitch's instructions. Of course, he didn't mention that an evil Force user had taken over her body after the seizure. Why did Snoke not contact him through their bond? Why was he just looking for him after all these months? Snoke was up to something and Ben didn't know what. He'd do anything to protect his family. It's his fault that Snoke is in Nat's life now. 

Nat still hadn't woken up since the seizure. If he found out that Snoke did this to her, he would kill him. What if Snoke was telling the truth? Maybe he hadn't done it and he really wanted to help. He heard the intercom go off and EMS wanted to be let in. He just needed Nat and the babies to be ok. 

He talked to EMS and told them what happened. They told him they needed to intubate her to protect her airway. The tears came even more when he saw them put a tube down Nat's throat and use a bag to breathe for her. He got into the ambulance with them to go to the hospital.

____________________________________________________

The ER staff was surprised to see both of them get out of the ambulance. He told them that she was 3 months pregnant and that he was her fiancé. No one was really shocked even though they never advertised that they were together. 

The staff made sure Nat was stable and immediately called for her to be taken to a room. She needed to get her blood and urine taken first before she went to have a head CT. They had to give him Nat's ring to hold onto. When he was given the ring, he started to cry even more. Twitch came in shortly after.

"Ben, do they know anything yet?"

"We haven't been here long. She just went up for a CAT scan. They gave me her ring. Twitch, please tell me she's gonna be ok! I can't lose them, they're all I have!" Ben started bawling and Twitch hugged him to comfort him.

"Ben, they are gonna do all they can for Nat. They love her and this is a great hospital. She will get the best care here. I promise. And you have me too. All of you are my family, too! Let's find some seats."

Twitch got them situated in the waiting room. Ben relaxed enough to stop bawling, but tears still flowed. Twitch happened to see Dr. Neal Pearce headed their way, but he bolted up to meet him. Nat had told him over the years about his harassment of her and he knew that she had put him in his place not long ago. This was not the time for Ben to talk to the doctor. "I'll be right back, Ben. Sit tight."

"Dr. Neal Pearce. I'm pleased to meet you again sir. I'm Jonathan Meyers. I look a little different these days, but I interviewed with you for a physician assistant position some years ago."

"Yes, I remember you. You definitely look different. I was disappointed to hear that you refused the position. You had great credentials and we could have worked well together. Unfortunately, I have other business to attend to. "

"Is that business about Natalie Granderson, sir? We are very good friends and I am here with her fiancé Ben over there. Do you have any new information on her condition?"

Pearce looked over and saw that Twitch was referring to Ben as Natalie's fiancé. He was a bit rattled when he saw him. 

"Sir, I know you and Ben have some history. I'd be happy to relay any information you have on Natalie to him. I'm sure you're a very busy man. "

"Mr. Meyers, I can tell you her scan is done and that she is stable for now. I still have to look over the scan, but she is being moved to a room soon. I can come by later to discuss the results."

"Thank you, sir. I know Natalie would appreciate your attention. She always spoke highly of your skills."

Pearce made his exit and Twitch made his way back to Ben. "Ben, the attending is gonna look at her head scan soon and he'll come by the room later to discuss results. He said she's stable so that is a good sign."

"Did they say if she's gonna wake up soon?"

"No, I don't think they know yet. Just try to be patient, ok? I'll be with you the whole time."

"Thank you, Twitch. You're a great friend." 

A few minutes later, the nurse let them know that Natalie was placed in a room and that she would direct them to it. When they got there, Natalie was still unconscious and intubated. The nurse knew that Ben was a fellow employee and that he was Natalie's fiancé. 

"Normally, only family is allowed here, but since you work here and you are her fiancé, I will make an exception for you. That doesn't mean the other rules don't apply. I expect you both to respect those rules." Twitch and Ben both nodded.

Ben immediately grabbed a chair and pulled it up to the side of Natalie's bed. He sat there and held her hand. The tears started to flow. Ben looked into Natalie's face and pleaded as he rubbed her hand,  
"Nat, I really need you to wake up now. You're scaring me. Wake up now, so we can go home, ok? I love you and I am gonna wait right here until you get up."

Twitch tried to be helpful. "Ben, do you need anything? Water, coffee?"

"No, I just need her to wake up. That's all I need. Thank you for being here for her and me."

Ben stayed quiet and just waited. He started to……….pray. He had never done that before, but now seemed like an appropriate time. But who was he praying to?

 

____________________________________________________

 

While Natalie was unconscious, she was dreaming. In her dream, she was walking toward a man. A very attractive man with shoulder length blondish brown hair with a very well healed vertical scar on his right eye. 

"Hello, who are you?," Natalie says to the man.

"Hello, Natalie. I hear you're going to make me a great grandfather. I'm Anakin Skywalker, Ben's grandfather."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you angst was coming. I didn't lie.


	29. The One I Believe In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A blast from the past and a blast from the future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to fit Anakin in somewhere and this seemed like a perfect spot.

"Mr. Skywalker--," Natalie started.

"Please call me Anakin."

"Ok, Anakin. I'm dreaming, right? How is it that I am talking to you? Ben told me that Force ghosts could only appear to Force users. I'm not a Force user."

"Ben found himself a smart woman. I can appear to you in your dreams only because you are not a Force user. I needed to speak with you and this was my opportunity."

"Why do you need to speak with me, Anakin?"

"I need to tell you that you have a part to play in the fight for the galaxy, Natalie."

"How can that be? I'm nobody. A nobody that was lucky enough to end up with a Force user."

"Luck has nothing to do with it. The Force brought you and Ben together."

"Ok, luck, the Force, whatever. Look, Anakin. The last thing I remember was I was feeling bad, went to sleep, and then I felt like someone shoved their hand up my ass and used me as a puppet. Now, if I'm dreaming, I'd like to wake up as soon as possible. I know your grandson is worried about me! As a matter of fact, why are you giving me this message and not him?"

"Snoke has blocked my communication with Ben for years. He cannot hear me right now. That is why I am talking to you."

"Ok, so you want to tell me that I have a part to play in the fight for the galaxy? What part is that?"

"I can't tell you that."

"Why? You went through all this trouble to bring me here and you can't give me details!"

"I can only tell you that you have an important role. Anything more I tell you could change the course of history for better or worse."

"But doesn't the fact that you are talking to me now do that?"

"I can only guide you in the direction the Force will allow, Natalie. You and Ben need to go back to his time and find my children so they can help you."

"Help us do what exactly, Anakin?"

"Natalie, I wish I could tell you more, but I can---,"

"Only guide me in the direction the Force will allow, I know. Ok, can I wake up now, Anakin?"

"You can't wake up now, you have more people who wish to see you."

"Who else wants to see me? Let me guess, you can't say, right?"

"You catch on very quickly, Natalie. The Force chose well for Ben. When you see Ben again, tell him I'm sorry I couldn't help him more."

"I will, Anakin. It was nice to meet you even though you really didn't tell me much, but I am realizing how much this sounds like my conversations with Ben about the Force. I'm sure he will be glad to have heard from you."

_________________________________________________

 

Ben was still in the same position, holding Nat's hand. He was beside himself with grief and anger. Three lives were hanging in the balance and none of his power could help save them right now.

The nurse came in and spoke to Twitch. "Mr. Myers, the doctor is asking to see you in his office for a few minutes." The nurse seemed to know this was an unusual request, but Twitch would comply and Ben wasn't interested in anything that wasn't Natalie waking up. 

Twitch went to Dr. Pearce's office. "Dr. Pearce, did you have more news on Natalie?"

"Well the thing is I'm puzzled as to why she hasn't awoken yet. According to the EEG readings, she is in REM sleep. She shouldn't need to be intubated at all. Of course, that could change and we have to think about the fetuses as well."

"So you're saying she is dreaming?"

"That is exactly what I am saying." Dr. Pearce seemed to hesitate like he had something else to say, but remained silent.

"Did the tests show anything else, Dr. Pearce?"

"Yes, they did, but I would prefer to wait until Natalie's awake to share that with her."

"Ok, Dr. Pearce. Thank you so much for sharing the information with me."

Twitch made his way back to Natalie's room. Ben still hadn't moved from Natalie's side. He decided not to share Dr. Pearce's news with Ben. It would just confuse and upset him. "Ben, you sure you don’t need anything? Maybe just some fresh air at least? I promise I will contact you if anything happens."

"No, I need to be here when she wakes up, Twitch. I…I can't leave."

"Ok, I won't leave either."

Just then, Natalie seemed to grab Ben's hand. "She grabbed my hand, Twitch. She can hear me. Do it again, baby." She grabbed his hand even more strongly. "She's coming back, she's coming back to me. I know it." 

Twitch could see the vitals on the monitors. Nothing really changed. He suspected it was just a reflex, but he didn't want Ben to lose hope.

_____________________________________________

 

Natalie stood waiting in her dreamscape since Anakin left. She just knew Ben was going crazy with worry while she was in here. She saw two figures walking toward her. A man and a woman of similar height. They both had olive skin like hers, shoulder length dark wavy hair like Ben's, their noses and mole dotted complexions were the perfect combination of Ben's and hers. They were her and Ben's children. Tears came to her eyes. "Hello, mother.," the man said.

"How is this possible?," Natalie said as she raised her hands to their faces.

"Anakin called to us in the Force. He knew you would be skeptical about what he told you and that we needed to come so you would believe it.," the woman said.

"But you haven't even been born yet?"

"The Force is in everything, mom. It is beyond space and beyond time. We need you and dad to go back to his time or else the galaxy will suffer.," her son said.

"What are we supposed to do there? What am I supposed to do? I can't use the Force!"

"We know it is confusing, mom. We need you to trust that we are telling you what is best.," her daughter said.

"Ok, when I wake up, I'll talk to your dad and we'll go back to his time to find his mother and uncle. I am so happy to meet you. Can you give your mom a hug?"

They hugged each other and Nat continued to cry because this was so overwhelming and crazy. She started to get that feeling you get when you are coming out of a dream…..

 

__________________________________________________

Natalie grabbed Ben's hand much stronger than before and the machines started going crazy. Natalie's eyes opened and she looked right at Ben with panic.

Twitch called for the nurse to come in. Natalie was awake and panicking because she had a tube in her throat. "Calm down, Natalie and we'll get you extubated." Natalie nodded her head and Ben hadn't let go of her hand. 

"Natalie, I want you to cough until I get the tube out of your throat, ok?" Natalie nodded in response and coughed until the tube was completely removed. "I'm gonna get the doctor so he can check her out."

Natalie was still coughing just to clear her airway. She tried to sit up and Ben stopped her. "Don't get up, baby. Just wait until the doctor checks you out, ok?" Her throat was so sore and her voice was scratchy. She had so much to tell Ben. They needed to go home ASAP. 

The doctor came in and examined her. He seemed to think she and the fetuses were fine and it extremely lucky that this wasn't worse than it was. "When can I leave?," Natalie said. "I think you should stay for a couple more days for further testing."

"I can't stay, we have to leave Ben.," Natalie said with her scratchy voice. 

Ben and Twitch looked at her like she was crazy and maybe she was. "Nat, I thought I was gonna lose you and the babies. Please stay the few days so they can make sure everything is ok first."

"Please, everybody out! I need to talk to Ben, please!" Twitch, the doctor, and nurse left the room.

"Stop being so stubborn and let them do their jobs, Nat! I don't want to take any risks with your health!"

"Just listen to me, please! Ben, I spoke with Anakin, your grandfather! He told me we need to go back to your time to find your mother and uncle so that we can help them. He said he's sorry that he couldn't speak with you directly, but that Snoke has been blocking you from him all this time. I know it sounds crazy, but I saw our grown kids, baby! They were so beautiful. They said the same thing that Anakin said. We need to leave now!"

Ben was reeling from what she just said. He took a few deep breaths and realized that what she said rang true to him. Twitch was probably gonna kill him for not keeping Nat here the extra days, but the Force seemed to want this. 

"Ok, let me get them back in here." Twitch, the doctor, and nurse came back in. 

"Nat wants to go home and I want to take her."

"Ben, you can't be serious! What is the harm in letting her stay a few more days?," Twitch said.

"Natalie, I can't advise this course. If you want to go home, it will be against medical advice.," the doctor said.

"Ok, I'll sign the papers and I'll leave under my own recognizance.," Natalie said still with a scratchy voice.

"Nat, what is so important that you would risk yours and the babies' lives over a couple days?," Twitch questioned.

"Twitch, I'm sorry. I wish I could say more, but I can't." The doctor brought the papers in and Natalie signed them.

"Twitch, thank you! I'll call you later.," Ben said as he picked Natalie up in his arms and they headed off home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Ben fell apart, but I promised angst. Hold on to your hats!!


	30. The One Who's Time Is Running Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie discuss what happened to her. Natalie receives some devastating news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie review her seizure and start making plans to return to Ben's time. Twitch has to help Natalie with a new crisis.

Ben got Natalie home and placed her in bed then laid himself behind her to squeeze her tightly. "I was so scared I was gonna lose you and the babies. I was going crazy."

"Did you see what happened to me, Ben?"

"Yes, you had just fallen to sleep. I went to the bathroom and when I came back, you were having a seizure. It lasted a few minutes and when it ended……Snoke started speaking to me through you. "

"Snoke?? What did he want?"

"He said he didn't want anything. That he was glad I had made a life for myself. That he wanted to help me."

"Help you with what?"

"He didn't say."

"Did he cause my seizure?"

"He didn't admit it, but I suspected it."

"Is this related to why Anakin wants you to go back?"

"I don't know. I wanted this part of my life to be over. I just want to be with you and the babies now, here in our home."

"I think if Snoke is looking for you now, it means you have to go back to get rid of him once and for all. What is he after? Does he want the babies?"

"I don't know what he wants. I just wish he would go away, but that isn't going to happen unless I help him go away."

"How are we gonna get back to your time, Ben?"

"There must be another portal or maybe the same one. If we are really going to do this, I need to meditate."

Just then, Natalie's phone rings. It's Dr. Pearce's office. "Hello."

"This is Dr. Pearce's office, Natalie. He needs to see you as soon as possible on an urgent matter."

"I just got back from the hospital, it can't wait until tomorrow?"

"Dr. Pearce says it can't wait and he is requesting that you bring Mr. Meyers with you."

Natalie just remembered that Twitch had been offered a position years ago with Neal, but ended up turning it down in favor of his current business. "Ok, we can be there within the hour. Is that ok?"

"Yes, Dr. Pearce says that is just fine. We will see you then, Natalie"

"Thank you, goodbye."

"What is it?," Ben said.

"I need to go back to the hospital for something. I need to take Twitch with me. I'm gonna call him right now so he can meet me here. Twitch will take care of me while you are meditating."

"You just left the hospital, it can't wait till tomorrow?"

"They say no, it's fine. I'll go and get this over with. I'll be back as soon as I can. I might even go ahead and initiate my leave of absence while I'm there especially since we'll be traveling soon."

"Ok, as long as Twitch doesn't leave your side, I'm fine with it. I'm gonna go down to the gym. Please call me for anything you need.," Ben says then he kisses Natalie deeply. "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby." She dials up Twitch on her phone. "Twitch, I know you're pissed at me, but I need a favor."

___________________________________________________

Twitch picked Natalie up at her house and they made their way back to the hospital to meet with Dr. Pearce. His office was empty except for the receptionist that she had spoken with earlier. "Hi Natalie, Dr. Pearce is waiting for you and Mr. Meyers in his office. Let me take you back."

She led them back to a garishly ostentatious office that so fit Neal's personality. "Natalie and Mr. Meyers, thanks for coming. Sorry to drag you back here when you just left. Have a seat." Twitch and Natalie sat down in the plush chairs. 

"I think we know each other well enough for me to say that what you did by leaving AMA was reckless and idiotic."

"Neal, cut to the chase. I've had a long day. What is so important that it couldn't wait until tomorrow?"

"If you hadn't left when you did, I would have discussed the findings from the CT scan with you. I purposely waited until I could speak with you directly. Let me bring up the scan so you can see what I am talking about. Have you been having headaches, Natalie?"

"Yes, but I attributed them to stress, chronic sinusitis, and later to my pregnancy. I didn't think they were a big deal."

"If you look at this scan, I think you can see that it is a big deal. It is a glioblastoma."

Twitch turned to look at Natalie's face as Dr. Pearce continued to talk. Natalie appeared to space out and Twitch gently grabbed her hand to try and ground her. Twitch started listening very intently. 

"I'm really sorry to give you this news, Natalie. Despite my inappropriate behavior with you, I always respected your skills. Maybe if I had behaved myself better, I would have been lucky enough to call you a friend. Please let me know if there is anything that I can help you with. If it is in my power, you'll have it."

Natalie said nothing. Twitch had to prompt her to speak. He knew she was devastated as was he. "Thank you, Neal.," Natalie said. She got up slowly and Twitch was right there to help her out of the office. They made their way to the elevator.

"Twitch, what the fuck just happened? I blanked out after he said the word glioblastoma."

"He just told you that you likely have less than 6 months to live, Nat."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you more angst was coming. This is gonna be rough. A lot of dialogue is coming. Will be a while before we get more smut.


	31. The One I Want to Marry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben hears Natalie's devastating news. The chapter gets a happy ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More angst, followed by a little fluff.

Natalie pulled herself together after Dr. Pearce's news. She had a lot of work to get done and she had to depend on Twitch to help her. They went to Human Resources to complete the leave of absence paperwork and initiate it immediately due to her illness.

Twitch arranged for a lawyer client of his to draw up her will and got her some recording equipment for another…project. 

"Do I look ok, Twitch?," Natalie asked.

"You look beautiful, honey. Let's get this over with so you can get home to Ben, alright?," Twitch said with some tears in his eyes.

_______________________________________________

Twitch and Natalie exited the elevator into Natalie's home. Ben was waiting on the living room couch. It was a little later than he was expecting them, but he thought maybe Twitch was still upset about what happened at the hospital and had probably spent a good bit of time reading Nat the riot act.

"Hey, baby. I missed you. You alright? You tired or hungry? We should probably order out so no one has to make any trips back to the hospital, huh?"

Twitch and Natalie were both stone faced. "Twitch, you staying for dinner?," Ben asked.

'No, he's not staying for dinner, Ben. Can you sit down with me on the couch? I need to talk to you."

Ben was starting to worry. He could try to pick up what was wrong from their minds, but he didn't do that anymore. "What's wrong? What happened at the hospital? Is something wrong with the babies?"

Natalie stroked his face to try to calm him. "The babies are fine, Ben. Something is wrong with me."

"What's wrong with you? If you feel bad, we can just go back to the hospital. I knew we shouldn't have left!"

"Listen, the call I got earlier was from Dr. Pearce's office--"

"Pearce? Did that asshole touch you again? I'll kill him--"

"Ben, he did nothing inappropriate. He gave me some bad news. The head CT they did showed that I have a brain tumor. I probably have less than 6 months to live."

Tears ran from Ben's eyes. "No, no! He's wrong!! We should get a second opinion! That fucker probably has it out for you now! You can't trust him!!"

"Ben, he's not wrong. Both Twitch and I saw the scan for ourselves. We don't need a second opinion."

"Ok, but there's treatment options, right? We'll just go where the best treatments are and you'll get better. If you can't get treatment because you're pregnant, you can just have an abortion. We can have children later."

"Ben, I'm not having an abortion! There is no real treatment even if I was to have an abortion. This type of tumor has a poor prognosis and I am going to die within 6 months!"

"Twitch, you must know somebody! You've got great resources. Someone you know has got to be able to help us. "

Twitch had stayed silent until now and his eyes were dewy with tears. "Ben, there are no resources that can help her. You need to accept this. I know it's hard--"

Ben grabbed Twitch and shook him, "What do you mean? Accept this? What is there to accept? Twitch, I know you can help us. Please just take a minute to think about it."

"Ben, let him go! I am dying! There is no cure! I plan to have these babies and you are going to raise them as their father without me! You need to accept it now! You need to grow up!"

Ben had let Twitch go and sunk to the floor to put his hands in his face. He cried like he's never cried before. Natalie went to him and sat on the floor with him to hold him. She let herself cry, but not too much so she could be there for Ben. Twitch lowered himself to the floor where they were and hugged the both of them until they were all soaked with tears. 

__________________________________________________

After their breakdown, everyone started to come around. Natalie got up first to sit at the kitchen table and Ben soon followed. He didn't want to be away from her even if it was just a few feet. Twitch sat on the floor for a moment more, wiped his face, and joined Ben and Natalie at the kitchen table. 

Natalie spoke first. "Twitch, Ben and I have to go see his family."

"Baby, I don't care about them right now. I want to be where you are to help you through this. I can see my family anytime."

"Is traveling a good idea right now, Nat?," Twitch said.

"Ben, your family will be able to help you after I'm gone with the kids. Twitch can help you. I just want to make sure you have all the support in the world before---"

"You're not going to let this go, are you? Even though you are dying, you still put others before yourself. When are you gonna put you first?," Ben said.

"This is me putting me first. I want to see the people I love as happy as they can be before and after I'm gone. You know what would make me happy? I wanna marry you, if you'll still have me."

"Why wouldn't I want to marry you? I love you and I want to spend the rest of----. Whatever time you have left, I am yours!,"

Ben pulled Natalie to his lap and kissed her. 

"Twitch, you think you could help us get married by tomorrow?," Natalie said.

"Sweetie, if you want, I can arrange for you to get married tonight!"

"Ben, is tonight too soon?," Natalie asked.

"No, it's not too soon.," Ben said as he kissed her again.

"Ok, crazy people. I've got arrangements to make cause we're gonna shoot for a 9pm wedding."

"Hey, don't we need a marriage certificate?," Natalie said

"Of course, honey, but I can cover that without a problem and yes, it will be a real one! Expect someone to be here within the hour to help you with your hair and clothes and I will, of course, be the one to give you away! I gotta get moving!"

Twitch left the house. Ben and Natalie were alone. "Ben, are you sure you want to do this? We've had the last few days from hell and I would understand if you want---" Ben grabbed her face and kissed her deeply. 

"I'm gonna marry the woman of my dreams who's pregnant with my children tonight. And no one can stop me!"

"Ok, we should probably get cleaned up then before the hair and wardrobe people arrive." They kissed long and hard then went their separate ways to shower. 

True to his word, the hair and wardrobe people were there within an hour. Twitch had already given them Ben and Natalie's measurements as well as multiple options for clothes they would like. 

Natalie picked an off white strapless dress that showcased her neck, arms, and legs. She asked the hairdresser to put her hair up with some strands cascading to her shoulders. She was not one for makeup, but did let the makeup girl give her a tasteful red matte lip and lightly mascaraed and lined eyes. Ben picked a black suit with a grey tie and he had the hairdresser give him a trim so his hair touched his shoulders. 

Twitch showed back up in a fabulous tuxedo and his blue hair stiffened with mousse. He had a justice of the peace, a marriage certificate, a musician, and a caterer in tow. Twitch could really put something together in a short period of time. "Ok, 10 minutes to 9pm. Let's get this show on the road, guys. "

Everyone took their places waiting for Natalie to come out. Ben stood next to Twitch and Twitch couldn’t resist messing with Ben's tie to get it right. "You clean up really well, Ben!"

"Thanks! You too, Twitch!"

The music started and Natalie came out of the bedroom with a small bouquet. Ben stared at her as she was walking out. She looked the most beautiful he's ever seen her. He really wanted to rip the dress off of her, but that could wait until later. 

As Natalie was coming toward Ben, she thought he looked so handsome. If she wasn't so tired, hungry, and nauseous, she'd rip the suit off of him. That could wait until later.

The music stopped and Natalie was standing right across from Ben with the justice of the peace in front of them. "Who gives this woman to this man?," the justice of the peace said.

Twitch beamed as he said, "I do and JP, you can skip the objections. Natalie's been through this before."

Natalie showed fake shock and shame, "Twitch, how dare you? He's right, JP! You can skip it!."

The justice of the peace smirked. "Ben Solo, do you take Natalie Granderson to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part?"

"I do!"

Natalie Granderson, do you take Ben Solo to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part?"

"I do!"

"Then by the power vested in me by the state of Washington, I now pronounce you man and wife! You may kiss the bride!"

Ben gently held Natalie's face in his hands and kissed her softly. Everyone in the room cheered. 

Twitch announced to the room, "I want to thank everyone for coming and playing a part in this beautiful occasion. Now, I'll ask everyone to leave the newlyweds alone so they can rip each other's clothes off. Good night everyone!"

Everyone started to clear out. Twitch stayed behind to check on Ben and Natalie. "Twitch, this was fabulous. Thank you so much!," Natalie said as tears came to her eyes.

"Twitch, you're a great friend. I appreciate your help!," Ben said as he pulled Twitch into a hug with tears in his eyes. 

"Think nothing of it, you two!! I was happy to help. Please call me before you guys leave so I can give you a proper sendoff!," Twitch said as he hugged Nat and kissed her cheek. "Enjoy your wedding night, loves!"

Twitch left the house. 

Ben and Natalie stood there for awhile to process everything that's happened to them. They hugged each other close. 

"Ben?"

"Yes, my wife?"

"I am starving and nauseous, so I am gonna feed my face until I'm ready to throw up. Then I'll probably go to bed because I'm exhausted. Is that ok with you?"

"Yes, whatever you want, baby. I love you."

"I love you, too, my husband!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really pulling for them, but angst is a fickle mistress!!


	32. The One Who Is My Match

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie enjoy their wedding night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I lied about the smut thing. Enjoy!!

Ben and Natalie took off their wedding clothes and packed them away. They sat at the kitchen table eating catered food while in their underwear and laughed at the themselves.

"Ben, have I ever told you that you have the sexiest voice I've ever heard?"

"What made you think of that, baby?"

"I'm going to tell you something new that I love about you every day. I mean, I should tell you everyday while--"

"Baby, let's just think about our wedding night and leave everything else for tomorrow, ok?"

"Ok."

"Are you still nauseous?"

"No, I am really tired though."

"Ok, then we're going to bed. We can clean this up later"

Ben picked Natalie up in his arms and took her to bed then placed himself behind her. He went about massaging her neck, back, and shoulders.

"How do you feel about married life, Ben?"

"I thought I'd be more nervous for the ceremony, but I wasn't. It just felt right."

"Nervous about what? Marrying someone you've only known for 3 months? Having twins? At least the sex is great!"

"The sex is great, baby. But I want you to sleep now so you'll be ready for what I'm gonna do to you later."

"You know great is not the best word. Earthshattering is more like it."

"Yes, earthshattering is a good word. How about life changing?"

"Life changing is technically two words, but still appropriate. How about mind blowing?"

"Baby, you're making me hard lying in bed with you naked. Stop torturing me and go to sleep."

"Ok, Ben. It won't be much longer." Natalie was right as she fell asleep about 5 minutes later.

Ben kept his arms around her while she slept. He wanted their wedding night to be special. He wanted to leave everything else for later. He fell asleep not long after.

_________________________________________________________________

Nat was clearly exhausted cause she slept a while, but Ben wanted to wake her up with a surprise. He slept for a few hours and just stared at her. She was a magnificent creature and she was all his. He couldn't believe the Force had blessed him with her and their children. He wanted to worship her everyday.

Ben bent over her while she was sleeping. He placed his mouth on her stomach and kissed it. He left a trail of kisses from her stomach to her vagina. He gently spread her legs and slowly began to lick at her clit. Natalie began to stir a bit, but didn't wake up yet. Ben continued to lick at her clit alternating between the flat and tip of his tongue. He increased his rhythm and Nat woke up to grab his hair and spread her legs wider. Ben loved it when she grabbed his hair. It made his dick so hard.

"Ben!," Natalie cried out. Ben started to suck on her clit. He could tell she was close because he was too. He would suck then lick increasingly faster. Natalie screamed in ecstasy and Ben followed not long after coming untouched. Ben kissed and licked at the insides of her thighs then he moved up to her lips to have her taste herself on him. He plunged his tongue into her mouth and kissed her deeply. They moaned into each other's mouths.

Natalie stroked his dick while they kissed. Ben pumped into her hand slowly. She moved her other hand to his balls and she cradled them gently. Ben started to drip precome and it mixed with his previous spend. "Baby, I wanna fuck you so hard!!," Ben growled.

"How do you want me, Ben?," she said breathlessly as she knew they were both close again. 

"On your hands and knees, please?"

Natalie obliged him. Ben entered her from behind and they both moaned loudly. They both started to move chasing their orgasms. Ben grabbed Natalie's hips bruising them with his hands. With every thrust, Ben was moving deeper within her. "Fuck, I'm coming, baby!," Ben said. He expended his load in her and she also came with a loud moan. 

Ben released Natalie's hips and moved her beside him in bed. He sucked at the spot behind her ear and trailed down to her neck and chest. Natalie moved her hands down his body to his ass and squeezed. "I love you so much that I don't know where you end and I begin anymore. Is that our "connection"?"

"It's our bond, we're bonded through the Force."

"What does that mean?"

"We're as connected as two people could be when we are in close proximity, we can speak to each other in our minds, feel what each other are feeling. It would only be stronger if both of us were Force sensitive."

"Can you feel the babies in the Force?"

"Yes, they'll be very strong with the Force someday."

"I wish you could have seen them, Ben. It was so surreal."

"I can see them. All you have to do is think about them."

Natalie flashed back in her mind to her dream and seeing her grown children. 

"They are beautiful. Thank the Force they don't have my nose and ears."

"They look like the best of both of us, baby. We did something good."

"Ok, baby. Can we talk about the kids later? I feel weird talking about the kids while we're naked in bed together and all I'm thinking about is defiling you."

"I understand, Ben. No more kid talk. You know, the only place we haven't had sex in the house is the shower."

Ben smiled. "Yes because you said that if we showered after sex that we would just start fucking again." Ben nibbled at Natalie's ear and moved his hands down to squeeze her ass. 

"Ok, well I changed my mind. We're a married couple now so we should add something new to our repertoire."

"That sounds good to me." Ben picks Natalie up into his arms and takes her to the shower. Natalie turns the shower on and lets the water flow over her body and Ben joins her under the water.

"You look so hot while you're wet, baby." Natalie runs her hands over Ben's wet abs and laps at his nipples. Ben grabs at her hips and gently gnaws at her shoulder. 

Ben picks Natalie up and she wraps her legs around his waist. Ben guides them under the water again to soak their skin. Their kiss is full of lips, tongues, teeth, saliva, and warm mingling breath. 

"I want to fuck you into the wall.," Ben murmurs against Natalie's mouth. Ben maneuvers so Natalie's back is against the shower wall. He lifts her up slightly so he can lower her onto his dick. When he's fully seated inside of her, they both nearly come from the contact. 

Ben slammed into her slowly at first and then moved faster. Natalie moved to meet him with each thrust. They looked deeply into each other's eyes.

"Ben, tell me you love me.," Natalie projected into Ben's mind.

"I love you, baby. I'll never stop loving you., " Ben projected back as he tried to fuck her through the shower wall and he nibbled at her lower lip.

Their mouths smashed into each other as they came explosively together and their screams echoed in the shower. After they settled from their orgasms. Ben gently set Natalie down on the shower floor. 

They grabbed some wash cloths and body wash to clean themselves up. Ben also grabbed the absurdly expensive hair products he requested for his hair to start his hair regimen. Natalie laughed at him cause his hair care was so at odds with his personality. 

"You keep laughing. You appreciate this stuff when you run your fingers through it or grab on to it.," Ben said.

"It's ok, your hair is your prized possession. I get it."

"No, baby. You are my prized possession. This hair is just one of my best features and I try to take care of it. That's all."

"Ben, you have many beautiful features. I love your hair, like I love your eyes, your nose, your ears, your lips, your smile, your scars ….really I love everything about you. Besides, we are not gonna be able to get this stuff back in your time."

"Baby, you might be surprised at my resourcefulness. And I love everything about you too. As a matter of fact, I love everything about you so much that I'm not gonna let you out of this shower again until we fuck each other senseless again."

"But only after you finish with your hair, right?," Natalie grinned.

"Yes, after I'm done with my hair."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really getting comfortable with Ben and Natalie's relationship. I hope you are too. The environment is about to change though and so might their relationship. Maybe.


	33. The One I Failed to Protect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie say goodbye to Twitch before returning to Ben's time. Ben is confronted by Leia, Luke, and Rey. Ben and Natalie attempt to make a home on the base before she is confronted about being Kylo Ren's wife.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A ton of stuff happens in this chapter. I probably could have done 5 chapters based on all the different scenarios, but I wanted to move the story along a bit faster.

Ben and Natalie went a few more rounds for bonded sex. The sex was glorious, but they were both partly avoiding much needed conversations. They got some rest and woke up to make breakfast together. After the food was prepared, they sat down to the kitchen table to eat and talk.

"So what happened when you meditated? Did you find the portal, Ben?"

"The portal is near where I came through it initially. We'll have to go there and it will open once we find it."

"Did Snoke know about the portal? He must have. He found you in another time and didn't think to mention it."

"He could have known. Snoke likes to play games. If he knew about the portal, why would he want me to be here? And why is he offering to help me? We probably won't be able to answer these questions until we get back."

"Are you worried about being with your family again? Whether they will accept you back?"

"I think if you got a message from my grandfather, then they did too. So I think they will "accept" me, but I don't know if they'll trust me."

"Could you be arrested?"

"It is a risk, but I think we have to take it."

"I'll be ready to fight if we have to."

"Baby, I will not let it get that far. As far as I'm concerned, whoever is not with us is against us. That includes my mother and uncle. You and the babies are my family more than they are."

"Ok, I hate to bring up the elephant in the room. If your family doesn't want to kill you or arrest you, then I'm gonna need reliable medical care for me and the babies. If you have to make a choice between me and the babies, you choose them."

Ben got up from the table and kneeled in front of Natalie. 

"Please don't ask me to do that, Nat."

"You know I have to. My time is limited. I have to focus on bringing them into the world as healthy as possible. I'm just an oven at this point."

"Don't talk like that. You are more than that to me."

"I know that, Ben. If we can't be realistic with each other about this, we are kidding ourselves. You need to know what will happen to me. It's gonna be ugly. I'll probably have more seizures. My personality could change. I probably won't be able to care for myself anymore. You might even regret ever meeting me."

"No, I will never regret that ever! I don't care how bad it gets! I will be there with you after the seizures. The change in personality won't bother me and I will care for you if you can't do it yourself. "

"These things are always hard on the caregivers. You'll need support too from your family or people you can rely on."

"We will find a way to make it work. I promise.," Ben said as he kissed her.

"Do you even know how to find your mother and uncle?"

"I'm not sure if they are together right now, but I know what system my mother is in at least. We should probably try to meet them in a neutral place just in case I can't trust their intentions."

"Ok, so we should plan to leave in the next day or so then? We have to see Twitch before we go."

"Of course, so we can say goodbye and thank you."

After breakfast, they contacted Twitch and he wanted to arrange a going away dinner. They planned to meet him the next night and leave the following morning. 

______________________________________________________________

Twitch planned a lavish party for the three of them. Ben, Natalie, and Twitch enjoyed each other's company for as long as they could until they had to say their last goodbyes. This was likely the last time they would all be together. They all cried tears of sadness when it was time to separate. Ben had grown to love Twitch as a great friend, but he hugged him and gave Twitch time to have a good farewell talk with Natalie.

"I don't know what I'm gonna do without you, honey. Who am I gonna tell all my dirty little secrets to now?," Twitch said.

"I think you just need to open yourself up to that special someone sooner rather than later, Twitch. I know you're doing well in your business, but sometimes things have a way of catching up with you. Please take care of yourself. Thank you for all of your help with the affairs I needed to complete. I hope that Ben will come back here and I need you to help raise your niece and nephew if he does. You're like a brother to me and I'm gonna miss you.," Natalie said with tears in her eyes.

They held each other tightly and said their goodbyes. Natalie met Ben outside and they went home to prepare for their adventure in the morning. 

_______________________________________________________________

 

When morning came, Ben and Natalie awoke with a sense of unease but they got themselves ready for the day. They'd already packed light bags for the trip cause they figured that they would get whatever else they would need in Ben's time. They retraced their steps to the place they met and looked around for the portal. They were able to find it easily and Natalie's mouth was agape. "I've only seen things like this in the movies and read about them in books. Now I'm about to go through one. This is so surreal. "

"Hold on to me tightly. It can be a bumpy ride and I'll try to cushion you with the Force."

Natalie followed his instructions and they moved into the portal. 

_______________________________________________________________

 

Natalie was still trying to get over the weirdness of traveling to Ben's time when they arrived at his ship. When they got on the ship, Ben started powering it up. He noticed that the fuel had been topped off and a quick supply check revealed that his rations had been refilled. Someone had prepared the ship for his return. He should check for a tracker before they leave.

Natalie looked at the ship in awe. "So this is your personal ship, Ben?"

"Yes, put together per my specifications."

"Is there a shower on board?"

"Yes, in the bathroom which is commonly called a refresher."

"How long will we be flying?"

"Probably close to 4hrs to the neutral planet I want to meet my family on."

"You have autopilot, right?"

Ben sensed where Natalie was going with this. "Yes, baby. What did you have in mind?," Ben said with a sly smile and a playful kiss to her lips.

"You think I'm gonna miss an opportunity to christen this ship with you? How adjustable is the pilot's seat?," Natalie said with a grin and a stroke of Ben's dick through his clothes.

________________________________________________________________________

It turned out that the pilot's seat was very adjustable. Ben was thanking the Force that he was insistent about the armrests of the chair being able to be put down so his arms could hang if he wanted and that the seat is able to recline fully. After Ben got the ship off the planet and set the course, he set the autopilot. He sat himself in the pilot's seat and Nat straddled him. They practically ripped each other's clothes off. 

"You always turn me on, baby. But seeing this ship and you flying it, makes me so fucking hot for you!," Natalie said as she nipped at his skin and licked a trail from his neck to his chest.

"I should have shown you the ship sooner.," Ben growled as he sucked and bit at her earlobe.

"Ok, take it easy. No marks anywhere your family might see. I don't want them to think I'm slutty!," Natalie laughed.

"Baby, I could give a fuck what they think about you because you're my choice. And I think they'll know we have sex because you're pregnant with my children. Now, let's stop talking about them cause I want to focus on us right now."

"I'm focused on your dick, Ben. "

"Ok, put your mouth to work then, baby."

They both had to laugh at their sex talk. Things had been so serious recently and they just wanted to relax and enjoy each other before their lives changed.

___________________________________________________________________

Ben and Natalie landed on the planet and he made contact with his mother. She agreed to meet him and she planned to bring Luke as well as the scavenger who was expectedly training with him. They should be there within the hour. 

"I didn't tell them about you, Nat. They are all Force users of varying degrees of skill. They will easily be able to sense yours and the babies' presence here. I don't want them to see you though. I want you out of sight just in case it's a trap. I'm gonna show you how to use this blaster just in case people start firing at us. I'm able to stop blaster bolts so don't worry about me. Protect yourself at all costs. "

"You really think Anakin brought you all this way to set you up, Ben?"

"No, that doesn't mean that Luke and Leia might not have other ideas or my mother's Resistance friends. Please just stay out of sight and protect yourself, ok?"

"Ok, Ben. I love you. I think it's gonna be fine though."

"I love you, too. I'm gonna take care of us. I promise."

_____________________________________________________________________

Ben sat at a table in the restaurant that Leia agreed to meet him in. He could sense her presence along with Luke and the scavenger and they were very close. 

Leia entered first and Ben immediately felt a wave of guilt over his murder of Han. Luke came in second and again guilt hit him because of his JediKiller exploits at his academy. Finally the scavenger arrived and the guilt receded replaced with seething distaste. He didn't hate her, but he lost to an untrained girl who had just discovered her powers. He had been too full of himself and it was a lesson he needed to learn. 

All three approached the table Ben was sitting at. He stood as he thought it was appropriate. "I see you came alone.," Ben said to the group of them.

"You didn't, Ben. You know we mean her no harm.," Luke says.

"She is not your concern right now.," Ben counters with a slight growl of protective anger.

"She's carrying my grandchildren, Ben. You risked a lot to come here. I know you wouldn't have done it if you didn't think it was important. Our family needs to come together now more than ever to defeat Snoke. That is why you're here isn't it?," Leia says.

"For now, we are just talking. I won't commit to anything yet. What about you, scavenger? Why are you here?"

"I know we need to defeat Snoke and I am willing to work with you to do it even though I saw you kill Han. I can tell you've changed. It was her who changed you, wasn't it?," Rey says as she looks at a grimacing Leia then back to Ben.

Ben had to steel himself. It was as if they wanted to throw his weakness in his face. "I didn't come here to talk about her. I got a message from grandfather about needing to return so I have. Did you receive the same message?"

"I have communed with father and he has said that we need to work together. Of course, I have my doubts, but I understand that our differences need to be put aside for the sake of the galaxy." Luke says.

"So suppose I go with you, am I going to be attacked or arrested? How do I know I can trust you?," Ben again says to the group.

"How do we know you aren't still in league with the First Order?," Rey says.

"I'm not in league with anyone! I didn't have to or want to come back here! I just want to protect my family! The only way to do that is to kill Snoke! That is all I'm interested in!," Ben says. 

"We are all on the same page then.," Leia says. 

"If we are going to do this, I need some assurances. No one outside of us can know of my past as Kylo Ren. My wife is coming with us. She needs to have access to the best medical care that you can provide on the base. We'll also need private quarters away from the general population. Can you meet these terms?"

"Yes, I can, Ben. Can we meet my daughter in law now please?"

Natalie came out from the shadows at Ben's mental assurance that things were fine. Leia, Luke, and Rey regarded the woman coming toward them. Natalie went to Ben to comfort him because she could feel the mental strain this meeting had put him under. She also projected to him that she was starving and the rations from the ship weren't going to cut it. He projected back that he would get her something right away. They kissed sweetly in front of his family and Rey and then he went to get her some food leaving Natalie alone with them. 

"This was always gonna be awkward so I'm Natalie, Ben's wife. "

"Natalie, I'm Leia, Ben's mother. Can I please hug you for bringing my son back to me?"

"Yes--," Natalie said as Leia put her arms around her and she hugged her in return.

"Natalie, I'm Luke, Ben's uncle. Pleased to meet you. I'm sure Ben has told you that your Force signature is very unusual---"

"None of you will be able to read her. I had a hard time when I first met her until she opened her mind up to me.," Ben said as he came back with a snack and a drink for Natalie. 

"And how did you meet exactly, Ben?," Luke asked curiously.

"That is a long story that I think we should discuss when we are at the base. It's been a long trip for us and I want Nat to get some rest as soon as possible.," Ben says as Natalie is wolfing down the food he brought her. 

"Will you and Natalie be joining us on our ship, Ben?, " Leia says.

"No, we will follow you in my ship. We can just say I stole it from the First Order, but it will only be used by me."

"Well, we still have much to discuss so let's get to base now.," Leia says.

Ben and Natalie and Luke, Leia, and Rey go off to their respective ships to prepare to leave. Rey sends Ben the coordinates and they all setoff to the base. 

When they arrive, Leia makes the arrangements for Ben and Natalie's quarters and alerts Dr. Kalonia to Natalie's pregnancy so the med bay can obtain the appropriate equipment and personnel. When Leia has gotten them their assigned quarters, Ben takes Natalie there to rest while he goes to have discussions with his family and Rey about future plans to attack Snoke. Of course, Ben has to apologize to his mother for Han's death and Luke for the massacre at his academy. These are difficult conversations and Ben fully accepts responsibility for his actions. He even apologizes to Rey for his kidnapping her and their fight which resulted in his scarred face. These apologies actually make up the bulk of their conversations and the plans for Snoke are saved for another time. Ben stops at the mess hall before he returns home to Natalie.

"Hey, baby. Did you get some rest?," Ben says.

"Yes, I did. You look like you need some. Let's eat and then we can go to bed. I'll give you a massage.," Natalie says.

They eat quickly and then make their way to the bedroom.

"You didn't tell them that I was sick, did you?," Natalie says.

Ben exhales. "No, I didn't but I will. Today was very hard for me. I had to apologize for a lot of mistakes and I just couldn't do it today. Make them feel sorry for me after all I've done. I think we have some time before I reveal everything to them."

"Your family seems like they care a lot about you and they willingly welcomed me. I think it will be fine. Even Rey seemed to be open to you. But enough about all that. I promised you a massage so assume the position."

Natalie massaged Ben's neck, back, and shoulders and he fell to sleep quickly. A few minutes later, she went to sleep too.

__________________________________________________________________

 

General Leia had to discuss the fact that Ben had returned with Finn and Chewie as they were the only other people on base who knew of his past as Kylo Ren. Finn was resistant at first, but he understood the gravity of the situation and realized that Ben was needed to defeat Snoke. Chewie, still reeling from the loss of his friend Han, agreed grudgingly as long as he didn't have to have routine contact with Ben. After a few weeks, Ben and Natalie fell into a routine at the base. He would meet with Luke and Rey to train most of the day. Natalie spoke with Dr. Kalonia about her medical background and she started assisting her in the med bay with patients. Ben tried to incorporate himself with the others on base, but making friends was always hard for him and being Leia's son didn't make it easier. Everyone liked Natalie and respected the work she was doing with Dr. Kalonia. Things appeared to be going well. Luke felt that Ben could do with some training to help him with his anger management problems. He suggested that Ben and Rey return to Ach-to with him for a week. Ben didn't want to leave Natalie alone, but he was confident that she would be safe and that the training would be worthwhile. He left with a promise to holocall her nightly until he returned. Natalie was always self sufficient, but of course she missed her husband and she agreed that the training would help Ben. 

While Natalie was working at the med bay, a man came in saying that his friend was hurt and looked like he had a broken leg. She felt confident she could assist someone with that in the field so Dr. Kalonia okayed her to go and help. Natalie followed the man out to a clearing where the friend was supposed to be. 

"Where's your friend?," Natalie said.

"I'm sorry. I lied. I needed to get you alone to talk to you about your husband Kylo Ren." the man said.

"I don't know what you're talking about so if you'll excuse me, I---"

"You won't be excusing me, you'll be coming with me!," the man says as he lunges for Natalie.

Natalie assumes a fighting stance. The man is taller than her and outweighs her by quite a bit. He grabs her by the wrist and tries to subdue her, but Natalie kicks him in the knee and hits him in the face. 

"Ok, you're a feisty one, aren't you?" The man goes for Natalie's neck and she kicks him in the same knee, dislocating it and he falls to the ground. She grabs the man's blaster and shoots him in the head. Two more men that apparently worked with the man she killed see the commotion and try to subdue Natalie. She is putting up a fight and Finn happens to come by.

"Hey, what are you doing to her? Put her down!, " Finn shouts.

The man in front of Natalie attacks Finn and punches him until he passes out. The man behind Natalie hits her on the back of her head and she falls to the ground passed out. The man who hit her picks her up and tosses her over his shoulder and he along with his cohort run off to a waiting ship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the jumping around. I'm mostly happy with the direction of the chapter, but not completely. Please let me know what I could have done better!!


	34. The One I'm Desperate to Find

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie gets kidnapped and Ben is desperate to find her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalie is a BAMF, but she still needs Ben's help.

"How the fuck could you let this happen?," Ben yells at Leia.

"Don't talk to your mother that way, Ben!," Luke says.

Ben tries to calm himself. "I need to find her right now. I need to see everyone who saw anything. You clearly have spies on the base. We need to root them out and see if they have any information that could help me get to her." 

"I think myself and Rey should handle anyone who needs to be interrogated or could potentially need their minds read. Ben, your mental state is in a dangerous place right now. We can't risk you being consumed by the dark right now.," Luke says.

"Ben, there's one more thing. Natalie killed a man before she was taken by his partners.," Leia says.

Ben bristles at this information. "We should never have come back here. We were all safer where we were. This is all my fault. I failed her and the children. I'm gonna find her and take her back home where we belong."

"You, Natalie, and those babies will never be safe as long as Snoke is still alive. You know that. That's why you came. We'll find Natalie. Try not to worry.," Rey says.

"I need to see the body of the man she killed. Maybe we can figure out what this is about.," Ben says.

 

Leia leads Ben, Luke, and Rey to the morgue where the attempted kidnapper's body is being kept. 

"This man had been with us since before you disappeared, Ben. There had been no indication that he wasn't loyal to our cause. He'd made lots of friends since being here. Everyone was shocked to find out about him. Finn heard the blaster shot and came toward it to find 2 more men trying to capture Natalie and he tried to stop them but was unsuccessful," Leia said.

The body and the man's effects were pulled out for them to examine. "Natalie killed this man, Leia? He is clearly much bigger than her. How could she have done it?," Luke says.

Ben was mournful about this. He wanted to keep Nat's hands clean of this business. This man forced her hand and made her a killer. "Nat has always been able to take care of herself. It's a bit of a long story."

"One I should like to hear one day.," Luke says.

Ben looked at the blaster that was in the man's effects. "This blaster is like mine. All the Knights of Ren have blasters, but not all use them. " He looks at the man's face and he seems very familiar. "This is Gendry Ren. We thought he had perished on one of our missions. He was one of our better fighters. If he's here that means Snoke is responsible for Nat's disappearance. He's calling me out. We need to go after him now."

"You know this is a trap, Ben. That is what Snoke wants. We aren't ready to face Snoke yet. We just need to focus on finding Natalie now. It would be days before she makes it to Snoke, right? If we find the ship, we can save her. We can guess where they are by the amount of time they've been gone and the trajectory to Snoke.," Rey says.

"We need to find her now. I have to assume that the other two men are Knights of Ren as well. I would also assume Snoke told them not to hurt her, but some of them were harder to control. She is in danger either way. Talk to who ever you need to talk to now. I am taking my ship to find her in an hour.," Ben says to the group. 

____________________________________________________________________________

 

Natalie stirs awake with a horrible headache and nausea. She's probably concussed. Her clothes are intact. She's on a ship of some kind. Her wrists and feet are bound with long chains. She has no idea where she is or where she's headed, but she knows she's in a lot of trouble. She killed a man who was trying to kidnap her. He had a blaster just like Ben's and Ben said they were made custom for his Knights. If the Knights of Ren had taken her, then she must be on her way to Snoke. What did Snoke want with her? He must want the babies. There was no way she would let Snoke take her children from her. While she was running over things in her mind, one of the other two men came in to check on her. 

"Ah, you're awake. I brought you some food. I'm sure those babies must be hungry by now.," the man says.

Natalie just stares at him. She knows it will do her no good to talk to them. She needs to listen to them talk though.

"Silent type, huh? Kylo taught you well. Gendry Ren was a great fighter. I would never have thought he would have been done in by a tiny pregnant woman. Kylo is a very lucky man. We've been ordered not to harm you, but I've not had a woman in a long time. These opportunities come few and far between. You're chained so I don't have to hurt you. I promise I won't leave any bruises. You're already pregnant so I don't have to worry about protection. It'd be a shame to waste my chance to have you. Even with the scar, you're very beautiful. "

Natalie laid on the bed with her chained hands above her head and her chained legs wide open on the bed. 

"You're a very smart girl. You and your children will survive this. There's no use in you fighting it."

He laid on top of her and started feeling her up. He was worse than foul. Natalie moved her arms and legs around him to feign interest while he was pawing her. Before he realized it, the arm chains were around his neck and the leg chains were surrounding his legs. Natalie tightened her grip on both sets of chains. When he finally realized he was at risk of being choked, he began to hit Natalie's left forearm as hard as he could. She tightened her grip even more. Eventually, the man died. She waited a minute or two before unwrapping the chains from his neck and legs. She struggled to get the man off of her, but she did and she grabbed the keys for the chains and the door. She grabbed his blaster from the holster. She was 100% certain that her left forearm was broken. Ben was gonna have to get there soon cause she probably wouldn't be able to fight with one arm and she couldn't pilot the ship either. 

___________________________________________________________________________

 

Viserion Ren had always hated Kylo. He got his place based on being the grandson of Vader. He was a team player though until Kylo abandoned his Knights. Viserion was an alpha and Snoke told him if he pulled off this mission that he would make him the new Master of the Knights of Ren. This mission alone was already working out for him because Gendry, his biggest competition, was eliminated by Kylo's wife. Kylo's wife was probably getting raped right now by Rhaegal Ren. The supposed point of this whole exercise was to draw Kylo back to Snoke so he could be eliminated. Snoke had ordered that the wife not be harmed, but then why pick the most savage of the Knights to execute his plan. It was time to put the next part of the plan in motion. Viserion needed to contact Kylo on the Knights' com channel.

"Kylo, I know you're out there. You better answer if you know what's good for your wife."

"Viserion, if you know what's good for you, you'll give me your coordinates right now. If you harm her in any way--"

"Kylo, listen. Your wife is probably getting fucked by Rhaegal right now so if I were you, I'd shut my mouth while I give you the coordinates." Viserion gave him the coordinates. "Now you be a good little boy, come alone, and get here quick before I cut your wife into pieces after Rhaegal is done with her."

"If you fucking lay a hand on her--" Viserion cut the connection and waited. 

Natalie overheard the conversation and knew she was in trouble. She tried to find a good hiding place. She hoped she could project that she was alright to Ben. If she could, then that meant the Ben was close by. "Ben, are you there?"

"Nat, please tell me you're ok. Are you hurt? Did they--," Ben said.

"No one raped me. I'll die before that ever happens to me again. My left forearm is broken. It happened when I killed Rhaegal. I took his blaster to protect myself, but please Ben. Get here soon. The last one seems a little smarter than his cohorts were."

"Stay away from Viserion, Nat! He was the worst of us. Bloodthirsty, he loved killing! It's bad enough that you are on that ship, but just stay put until I get there."

"Please hurry, Ben! I love you."

"I love you too. Be careful!"

___________________________________________________________________________

 

Viserion took a trip around the ship. It seemed eerily quiet. No screams coming from Kylo's wife. He entered the room where they were keeping her and he found Rhaegal dead with his blaster missing. "Damn, she's good!" Of course, she can't be far away. She may have even overhead him talking to Kylo. "Oh Mrs. Kylo, come out, come out wherever you are!!"

Natalie bristled when she heard him call her out. Obviously he knew the ship better than her and would find her eventually. She just hoped the blaster would be enough until Ben got there. 

"I'm sure you know your husband is on his way to rescue you! Come on out so we can talk like adults! My fellow Knights were so inappropriate and I'd like to apologize for that. Women shouldn't be treated like that. I wonder if Kylo told you about any of our past exploits. That bit at his uncle's academy was his first taste. That's where he earned his nickname Jedikiller. You must go in for that sort of thing if you're with him. He might be hanging with Resistance now, but that never washes off. You know I will find you! The ship isn't that big."

He seemed to be getting closer now. Natalie put herself in a position so she could shoot him if he enters the door. Suddenly someone's banging at the door, louder and louder, but it doesn't open. Finally, it does open and some sort of flash bang ordinance goes off disorienting Natalie and Viserion gets his hands on her. 

___________________________________________________________________________

Ben hadn't heard from Nat recently, but he could tell she was in trouble. He had to hurry. His ship was right next to the Knights' ship. He used the Force to form a bubble around himself so he could enter their ship by Force opening the door. Once he entered, he closed the door so the ship's oxygen wouldn't be compromised. 

"Well, well. Kylo, thank you for finally joining the party!," Viserion said while he was holding Natalie hostage.

"I'm here now! I'm who Snoke wants! You can let her go now, Vis!"

"That'd be pretty boring, Kylo! This young lady is very interesting. Way too interesting for a twat like you! You were always weak, weren't you? How could you get a woman like her? "

"Vis, please! I'm begging you! Let her go and we can go to Snoke together!"

"No, she stays!! Awe, baby. You're hurt. Look at that arm." Viserion grabs Natalie's bruised left forearm and digs his fingers in. Natalie screams and it makes Ben's blood curdle. Natalie looks as though she could pass out from the pain. "I think that's broken, mate. I can hear and feel the bones clicking.," Viserion says as he smiles sickly.

"What do you want, Vis? Please don't hurt her anymore! You have all the power!, " Ben was trying to get into Viserion's mind, but Snoke must have blocked him. He had to do something now.

"You got that right, Kylo! I'm gonna be the master now! I am gonna lead us to glory unlike you! Snoke's golden boy, huh? Not anymore. He finally realized he backed the wrong horse! Better late than never!!" Natalie moans in pain. "Aww, she's not sounding too good. Maybe I should put her out of her misery. It'd be cruel to let her suffer like this anymore!"

Just then, Ben uses the Force to aim his blaster at Viserion's head and he falls to the ground dead. Ben uses the Force to catch Natalie before she hits the ground and he runs over to her. 

"Baby, I've got you. You're gonna be ok. We're going to my ship and we'll get you something for the pain.," Ben says.

"Ben, how did you ever work with this bunch of incompetent assholes?"

"Nat, I question that myself. I'm just glad that you're ok. Let's get home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I am a Game of Thrones fan as you'll notice from the names of the Knights of Ren. Viserion is an asshole, but an entertaining one to write. He kind of reminds me of Euron actually. Hope you enjoy the chapter!!


	35. The One I Would Sell My Soul For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie and Ben make it back to the Resistance. Ben gets an offer he's not sure he should refuse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalie is recovering from her injuries. Ben and Snoke discuss the future.

Natalie was in bed in the med bay sleeping and Ben was right by her side waiting to hear from Dr. Kalonia. He was beside himself and he knew it could have been so much worse. It pained him that Nat was forced to kill two of his Knights. She should never have been put in that situation. Snoke was responsible for this. Why would he take this action? If he wanted to kill them, he could have just attacked the base as he had originally planned. Why go so far as to kidnap a dying pregnant woman? He couldn't possibly want Ben back that badly. There was no contact between he and Snoke since he went through the portal except after Nat's seizure. Ben needed answers and he could only get them from Snoke. 

"Baby, your thoughts are all over the place. I can't sleep.," Natalie croaked out.

"I'm so sorry. I'm just trying to figure out what and why it happened. I probably need to sleep myself. After the doctor comes, I'll ask my mother to sit with you while I get some rest, ok?,' Ben says as he kisses Natalie's face.

Dr. Kalonia enters the room. "Good, you're awake. How do you feel, Natalie?"

"Like I got hit by a truck, but the pain is better at least. Are the babies ok?"

"The babies are doing just fine. As far as you, your left arm is in bad shape, but I think that it will get better with some bacta treatments. You won't be able to use it for a while and luckily it's your nondominant side. You were showing signs of a concussion, but not a serious one and that should resolve soon. The head scan showed no changes from what we already knew about. You're going to need a ton of rest and some close observation."

"When can I go home, doctor?"

"I want you to stay a few more days so I can observe you and then I can turn you over to Ben's care."

"Thank you, doctor. Is my mother here yet?"

"Ben, she, your uncle, and Rey haven't left since you brought Natalie in here."

"Ok, thank you. Baby, I'm gonna talk to my mom for a bit. Let me know if you need me.," Ben kissed her again before he left her bedside.

Ben walked out of the med bay and into the waiting room where Leia, Luke, and Rey sat waiting. 

"How is she? Are the babies ok?" Leia rushed out guiltily.

"The babies are fine. She's tired. The doctor said her arm is in bad shape, but the bacta should take care of it. She has a concussion, but it shouldn't take long for her to get past it."

"Thank the Force." Leia uttered.

"I'm relieved she is ok, Ben. Am I to understand Natalie killed two of your Knights? How could she manage that?," Luke questioned.

Ben really didn't want to talk about this, but Luke seemed fixated on it. "Nat was something of a crime fighter where she's from. She trained for years and did it in her spare time. She was pretty good at it. I imagine she let her motherly instincts take over. I'm just glad this wasn't worse than it could have been."

"I should think that we should start training with her once she gives birth. We could probably all learn something from her.," Rey said.

Ben didn't want to have this conversation, but now was as good a time as any. "That isn't possible. Nat's sick. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor before we left her home and was told she had less than 6 months to live." The group gasped. "It made it more important to her that we come here. She wanted me and the babies to have as much support as possible. And yes, Dr. Kalonia confirms the diagnosis and agrees there is no possible treatment right now." Ben must have been tired because he just realized he had tears running down his face. 

Leia wrapped her arms around her weeping son to try to comfort him. Luke and Rey looked at each other, unsure how to react. "We will help you in any way that we can, Ben." Leia said.

"I need to stay close so I can take care of her. I don't want to lose any more time with her. If I'm training, someone else who I can trust has to be with her. Who knows when Snoke might try to make another move.," Ben said.

"Were you able to find out anything about what Snoke's plan was in kidnapping Natalie?," Luke asked.

"No, but the only way to find out is to ask him.," Ben said.

"Ben, you can't possibly think now is a good time to confront Snoke!," Leia said.

"I can contact him through our bond. I don't like it, but he must have had a reason to bring Nat into this. Before we came and before we knew she had a brain tumor, Nat had a seizure. I witnessed it and when the seizure was finished, Snoke used Natalie's body to speak directly to me. All that time I was gone there was not a word from him, but he picked that moment to try and talk to me. He offered me help. He offered to be a father to me. There is more to this and I have to try to figure it out. I will not let him harm my family again."

"This is dangerous, but I believe you are right and that it is necessary. What do you need from us, Ben?," Luke said. 

"Can one of you just sit with Nat and keep an eye on her while I do some meditation and contact Snoke through our bond? I don't want her to know I'm doing this just yet."

"Of course, I'll go first.," Leia volunteered.

"I'll go next, if you're not done by the time she has to leave, Ben.," Rey said. 

"Thank you. I'll let you know what I find out." Ben leaves the building and heads to their quarters. He's tempted to go to bed for a week after this ordeal with Nat, but he can't do that. She needs him and he needs her. He has to be done with letting his emotions take over. Which brings him to Snoke. This conversation can go very badly if he can't control himself. His relationship with Snoke is for lack of a better word, complicated. He should center himself before he talks with Snoke. He sits in the open area of his quarters akimbo and relaxes himself into a meditative state.

________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben can't wait any longer. He has to contact Snoke now. "Snoke, I need to speak with you please." He didn't want to show too much deference. At least he didn't call him Supreme Leader.

"Kylo, why did you wait so long to contact me? I told you I was here to help."

"You sent 3 bloodthirsty Knights to kidnap, rape, and attempt to kill my pregnant wife! What kind of help is that?"

"Kylo, that was a misunderstanding. They were not supposed to hurt her. I simply needed to see if she was worthy of you."

"What do you mean worthy? I choose to be with her, have children with her, and have her as my wife. I've put her through so much already that I hardly feel worthy of her! What was the point of this?"

"Kylo, I told you that you are like a son--"

"I'm not your fucking son! I killed my father because you told me to! My name is Ben! It always was and this whole thing with you was a mistake! All I've done is ruin lives through my association with you!"

"Kylo, Ben, I really do just want to help you. I know she is safe for now. She killed two of your Knights! She is a great warrior indeed worthy of you! I also know she will not be safe for long. Why don't you ask me for the help only I can give you?"

"What help is that?," Ben asked not wanting to go down this road as it would only bring everyone trouble.

"You want to save her life. She is dying, maybe even before she gives birth. Although with her spirit, I'd bet on her making it to delivery but not past it."

"So if I did ask for your help and you gave it, what would you ask for in return?"

"Come now, Ben. Look at me and look at you. I have lived a long life in this body and others. Yes, I have gained much knowledge and riches, but I cannot enjoy those things to the fullest. I can transfer my consciousness into your body and we can share the space. I can also save your wife and you both can live long lives together. With my resources, you and your family can live well beyond your current means for many lifetimes. This is the best choice for you and Natalie."

Ben thought about it. What could be better than having a lifetime with his family? It is all he ever wanted. Snoke is probably telling most of the truth, but he is still hiding something. 

"There's something more. What are you not telling me, Snoke?"

"Ben, I have no reason to lie to you now. All cards are on the table. You have never been able to hide anything from me. I know this discussion will stay between us, won't it? Till we speak again."

Ben felt Snoke's presence leave his head. Snoke was right he couldn't tell the others about the possibility of this deal. He knew there would be a price to pay at some point with Snoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course, you know Snoke is not telling Ben everything but it seems like a good deal, right??


	36. The One Who I Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie is going stir crazy. Ben tries to protect her way too much. Hux comes across some new information. Snoke is trying to wait patiently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Checking in with the Resistance, First Order, and Snoke.

Natalie had been home a few weeks. Things were starting to become routine. Ben would get them breakfast in the morning and they ate together. Then he would go train with Luke and Rey while either Poe, Finn, or Leia "babysat" her. Ben came home from training for lunch and they ate together. When he went back to training, either Poe, Finn, or Leia "babysat" her again. Then Ben came home for dinner, they ate together, and went to bed. Natalie was getting sick of it. Everyone was treating her like a child. Yes, she was sick and pregnant, but she had proved she could protect herself. She hadn't said anything because she knew Ben was under a lot of stress.

"Ben, can we talk please?"

"Yes, baby. What is it?" Ben said tiredly while he was holding Nat in his arms from behind her.

"When am I gonna be allowed out of the house? I'm going stir crazy, Ben."

"I know, baby. I'm just trying to keep you safe. What's wrong with that?"

"I'm older than you and everyone wants to babysit me like I'm a kid. You said yourself that Snoke isn’t coming for me anymore. Why can't I go back to helping out at the med bay?"

"Please just let me protect you. This is the only way I know how."

"What are you protecting me from then? You are keeping something from me, aren't you? I know it. What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing. I'm tired. Can we go to sleep and talk about it in the morning?"

"Ok, we can talk about it in the morning. But after breakfast, I'm going to the med bay to help out Dr. Kalonia."

"I don't want you leaving the house right now. "

"Why?"

"Because I'm scared. I'm scared of losing you, alright? Now, can we talk about this in the morning?"

"We can talk about it in the morning, but I am leaving after!"

"Why can't you just let me take care of you, Nat? I love you and I just want to take care of you!"

"You're not taking care of me. You are trying to stop the inevitable. You can't do that and the sooner you realize it the better off we'll both be! Ben, talk to me, please!"

"What if I could save you, cure you?"

"There is no cure! We've been over this.," Natalie thought about Ben's secrecy and paranoia. "You spoke to Snoke, didn't you? What did he promise you?"

"He offered to help us. That's all."

"You know you can't trust him, Ben! Look at what he's done to you and your life!"

"Don't you think I know that? If what I went through led to me being able to save you, it is worth it!"

"No, it isn't, Ben! Death is part of life. We all have to accept it. I don't want to waste precious time focusing on things that will never happen. I want you, Ben. I love you, Ben. You've been keeping this secret in and separating yourself from me." Natalie started to kiss his neck and ran a trail up to his ear. Ben moaned softly. "You haven't touched me in weeks."

"I was giving you some time to recover.," Ben said as he ran his hand over her ass and nibbled at her ear.

"I'm still recovering, but we can work around that, right? My arm is a little sore still, but the rest of me is ok." Natalie said then kissed Ben like she was starving for it and he returned it with fervor like he needed her breath to live.

Natalie moved her right hand to stroke Ben's dick through his shorts. He had been rock hard since she kissed his neck. "Aah, I missed you so much, baby!," Ben said as he ran his tongue from her neck to her shoulder. He bit her shoulder, but did not draw blood.

"Show me how much you missed me, Ben!," Natalie breathed out as Ben moved down to remove her underwear with his teeth. As he discarded them, he spread Natalie's bent legs wide. He buried his nose in her pubic hair for a moment to remind himself how she smelled and he darted his tongue in to touch her clit reminding himself how she tasted. He moaned at the memories and tried to make sure they were implanted in the deepest parts of his brain. He began to stroke at her clit with his tongue. He felt her hand in his hair. He heard her moan in response to his licking and sucking at her clit. He loved the sounds she made when they made love. It fulfilled part of his need for her. He took them right to the edge of their orgasm by pleasuring her and then he moved up to kiss her deeply. He wanted to come inside her. 

Natalie wanted to take him into her mouth. She got on her knees and Ben gently placed himself in her mouth. He stroked her face as she looked into his eyes and sucked the tip of his dick. Slowly she took more of him into her mouth. Ben thought he might come just from the feeling of his dick touching the back of her throat. After he thrust into her mouth a few more times, Ben pulled out before he could spill down her throat. "I want to come inside you please.," Ben projected into her mind. He picked her up from the floor and placed her back in the bed. She laid on her back and spread her legs. Ben lined himself up to enter her. When Ben was fully seated inside her, they both moaned and they were both so close. "Fuck me hard, Ben! I missed you so much!," Natalie projected into his mind. It only took a few thrusts before Ben's seed spilled into her and they both came loudly. They kissed deeply for a few more minutes. Both of them were exhausted. "We can talk in the morning now, baby.," Natalie said as she smiled. Ben moved behind her to hold her in his arms and they both fell asleep.

__________________________________________________________________________

 

General Hux waited for Phasma to come to his office. She stated she had news regarding Kylo Ren. Phasma indicated she was outside his office door.

"Enter, Phasma!"

"Sir, as I said I have some news on Kylo Ren. Apparently, he is living on the Resistance base with his pregnant wife."

Hux reeled when he heard this news. He wasn't surprised that Kylo was not loyal to the First Order cause he had always stated as much. But he is having children with a woman. He'd be interested to meet this woman that tamed Ren one day.

"Ok, so he's a traitor. Can't say I'm surprised. Anything else?"

"We've also heard that the Supreme Leader sent some Knights to kidnap Ren's wife and she killed two of them. Kylo killed the third. This information I found very interesting, sir."

"I agree, Phasma. Why kidnap the man's wife? The Resistance are our enemies. We could just bomb the hell out of the base. And could he possibly want Ren back after this? The biggest question of all for me is why hasn't the Supreme Leader let us in on this. Why all the secrecy?"

"I think it's clear that the Supreme Leader has a separate agenda from the First Order. Maybe we could look at Kylo Ren as an ally of a sort, sir?"

"I need to think about it, Phasma. Come to me with any new information. Dismissed."

Hux needed to make his next moves very carefully.

________________________________________________________________________________

 

Snoke had thought that Kylo Ren would jump at the chance to save his wife's life, but there had been no contact since their last conversation. They were still months away from Natalie's impending delivery. What was Kylo waiting for? Was he really going to let his wife die? He's only meant to force Kylo's hand a bit with sending the Knights for his wife. Maybe he selected them poorly, but Natalie was prepared to kill for her children. This was something he admired. He'd have to be a little more patient with Kylo. The sicker she gets, the more likely he will be to accept his gracious offer. It's just a matter of time before he comes to his senses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben is still having a hard time coming to terms with Natalie's condition, but does that mean he's willing to give in to Snoke again? We'll have to see!!


	37. The One I Need In My Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is becoming more real for Ben.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalie's condition worsens and Ben is beside himself.

Natalie's headache was really bad today. Ben took off training today to stay home with her because he was concerned. Natalie stayed in bed and Ben brought her breakfast. After they ate, he massaged her neck, back, and shoulders. She was about to fall back to sleep when it happened. 

"Ben, gimme your hands!!," Natalie said as she guided his hands to her stomach.

Ben felt the babies' movement for the first time. It made things seem for real for him. Like he finally realized the stakes of the situation. He felt like he could stay in this position forever. "That's incredible!"

"Ok, daddy! I think the babies like it too much. Back to my massage please!"

"I love you, baby.," Ben restarted the massage, but was lost in thought about what he was gonna be losing soon. He wanted to raise these babies with her. That was the way it should be. He knew she would be a great mother to his children. Why should they be robbed of that when he had a way to stop it? Could he really just sit there and watch Nat die and not do anything about it?

"Ben? Ben?"

"What? I'm sorry, what?"

"Where were you?"

"I was just thinking."

"You were thinking of taking Snoke up on his offer again."

"Yes."

"Baby, I know this is hard for you. It is hard for me. I don't want to leave you. I'd do anything to stay. But have you make a deal with Snoke. You've been through this before with him. You'll never get what you really want from him. He always keeps something to himself. You can't trust him. Please stop pulling yourself away from me like this. Stay with me in the here and now. I just want us to be happy with the time we have left."

"I'm trying, I swear."

"Ok, I'm going to rest for a little bit and then you're going to ravage me when I wake up, ok?"

"Yes, ma'am!"

___________________________________________________________________

 

Ben woke about an hour later to find Nat seizing in his arms with blood trickling from her mouth. He injected her with the anti-seizure medication that Dr. Kalonia gave him and he contacted the med bay. The medics picked her up and got her to Dr. Kalonia within minutes. Ben was close behind and he had alerted his mother to what had happened. Even though he and Nat had been talking about it, he just now realized that this was his life now. Every day was a waiting game to see when his wife would die. Nat assumed she would make it to deliver the babies, but there was no way of knowing that. The reality was that he could lose all of them. He was sitting at her bedside and she was looking peaceful, but she started seizing again. This time it lasted for a few minutes. The doctor gave her another injection. It calmed Nat again, but she had another seizure that lasted about the same amount of time. Once they felt she was stable enough, Dr. Kalonia had her sent for another head scan. 

He was dying inside. He could stop this. He didn't care what the cost would be. His wife was dying. His babies who just became so real for him could die. 

Leia came in to comfort Ben. Ben's face was wet with tears. "I can't lose them, I can't! I don't know what to do!"

Dr. Kalonia came over to talk with Ben about Natalie's condition. "Ben, the seizures have stopped. The blood that came from her mouth was her biting her tongue during the seizure. The head scan does show that the tumor has gotten a bit bigger. We're starting some IV fluids because it looks like her kidneys are a bit overworked and some antibiotics for what looks like a bladder infection. The babies look fine, but I think we need to bring in an obstetric and a neurologic specialist at this point. I think Natalie and the babies need a higher level of care now. I strongly suggest you move your quarters closer to the med bay. She's back in her room now. She probably won't wake up for some time, but you can see her now."

"Thank you, doctor.," Leia says as Ben was reeling from all the doctor had said.

Both Leia and Ben went to Natalie's room. Ben sat down next to her bed and couldn't believe that earlier today they were laughing together and feeling their babies moving under his hands. She looked so diminished, she looked nothing like the vibrant woman he fell in love with, but he loved her and the babies more than he could ever love anything. He needed to make a decision soon.

_______________________________________________________________________

 

Ben awoke to Natalie's fingers in his hair. He looked in her tired eyes and she smiled weakly. "I'm sorry I scared you, baby. The babies ok?"

"Dr. Kalonia said they're fine. She wants us to move closer to the med bay. She also said she wants some specialists to come in for you and the babies now. She's giving you fluids and antibiotics."

"Ok. I wish you could get in bed with me, baby. I just want us to hold each other right now."

"I'm a little too big to get in the bed with you, but I'll see what we can work out.," Ben said as he moved closer to the bed so they could try to hold on as much as was possible.

"I love you, Ben."

"I love you too."

_________________________________________________________________________

 

She stayed in the med bay for a week. Ben never wanted to leave her side while she was there, but Leia made him. He needed to prepare their new quarters, he needed to shower and shave, he needed fresh air, his mother said. He was never gone for long. He always came back for Natalie and the babies. While they were still at the med bay, they did an ultrasound to check the babies' size and condition. The doctor said everything looked fine and that the babies were thriving. Ben cried when he saw them. He saw their heads, bodies, hands, and feet. Natalie wiped the tears from his face. "You're gonna be a great father, Ben." That made him smile, but his next thought was that they wouldn't have a mother.

________________________________________________________________________

When Natalie reached 6 months, the doctor insisted on her being on strict bed rest except for trips to the bathroom for which she would need to be assisted. He thought it was the best way to protect the babies just in case Natalie continued to have seizures. Natalie didn't argue this cause she was starting to get huge and was just going to get bigger. Ben gave up on full time training with Luke and Rey so he could be with Natalie. He'd train as much as he could while Nat was resting. She was resting a lot, so much that he sometimes had to wake her to eat. The doctors weren't worried about this right now because she was gaining weight still. 

Nat was up at night quite a bit cause she slept a lot of the day away. Ben didn’t mind it. Sure he was tired, but they would talk, cuddle, and make love if she was up to it. She couldn't move like she used to. Ben had to fuck her from behind while she was on her side most of the time. The babies would go crazy when they had sex which was weird and awesome at the same time. Sometimes Ben and Nat would have to stop in the middle until they calmed down. "What does it feel like in the Force when they're like this, Ben?"

"They're happy that their parents are happy. That's the best way I can describe it, Nat.," Ben said as he kissed her neck.

"I want them to stay happy all the time. I wish they never had to know any unhappiness, but that isn't how life is. I know you'll be happy with someone else after I'm gone. You'll be the hot dad with twins. Chicks dig that.," Natalie said as she stroked Ben's hand on her stomach.

"Baby, please don't talk about me being with other women while I still have my dick inside you and I'm stroking your pregnant belly."

"So that's a turnoff? You wanna stop fucking me now?"

"No, I just don't want to talk about this. I love you and I always want to fuck you. I think you know by now how much of a sick bastard I am." Ben said as he continued to stroke Nat's stomach and moved his other hand to stroke her ass.

"Yes, baby, you're my sick bastard, Ben! Now fuck me hard so we can come and we can go to sleep." Of course, Ben obliged her. 

After they came, Natalie turned toward Ben and kissed him before she fell asleep. Ben stayed up and stared at her. He knew their time was running out. He hated thinking about being with anyone else. No one else in his life had ever accepted him for who he was unconditionally like Nat did. He knew now that no one would ever love him like she did. She matched him perfectly. How was he going to raise these babies without her? She was the best thing in his life and soon she'd be gone. Nat's hands on his face broke through his thoughts. "Baby, I know you're worried. Do you trust me?"

"I trust you with my life, Nat."

"You and the babies will be fine. I promise. You have to believe in yourself. Your family can help you. Twitch will help you if you go back to my time. You'll have lots of support whichever direction you go. Just relax with me so we can sleep, ok?"

"Ok," Ben relaxed and they both fell asleep.

After they woke up the next morning, things started to get worse. 

Nat started becoming obsessed with keeping her hands clean. "Don't you see them? I can't get them clean. It won't come off.," she said.

"Baby, your hands are clean. You've washed your hands 10 times today already. Your skin is going to get raw if you keep washing them so much."

"Ben, my hands are covered in filth! I have to try to keep them clean!"

"Honey, please. I'm telling you they are clean."

"They are covered in blood, Ben! How can you not see it?"

"Baby, it's in your head. There is no blood on your hands. I promise you."

" I'm tired. I want to go to bed and rest."

"Ok, you want me to give you a massage to help you go to sleep?"

"No, I can go on my own." Ben left her alone for about 15 minutes. When he came back, her hands were actually covered in blood--her own. She'd scratched at and opened wounds on both sides of her hands. "Baby, stop! You're hurting yourself!," Ben said.

"I can't get them clean! Please help me get them clean!" He took her to the med bay and they sedated her to keep her from hurting herself. Dr. Kalonia said the head scan showed the tumor had increased in size again. 

"Ben, I have to be honest with you. This is not a good prognostic sign. When we start seeing hallucinations and personality changes, that usually means someone is getting closer to death. Natalie indicated to me long ago that she wanted to prioritize the babies before herself. She wanted to be kept alive until the babies were delivered and then any lifesaving measures were to be stopped."

"Am I ever gonna be able to take her back home with me again?" Ben said with tears streaming down his face.

"I'm not sure. It depends on how she is after she awakes from the sedation. If she still tries to hurt herself, she will need to stay with us. If she comes around to herself then I'd like to keep her for a few days before she goes home.," Dr. Kalonia said.

"How long before I could see her?"

"She should start coming around in an hour or two. If you want, you can go home and get some rest. I'll call you when she wakes."

"I'm gonna go see my mother, can you contact her when Nat wakes up please?"

"No problem, Ben." Ben walks to his mother's quarters and knocks on the door. Threepio answers and Ben barely registers his ramblings as he greets him and shows him in. Leia can see Ben is upset and sits him down to talk. "I just took Nat to the med bay. She thought she had blood on her hands so she tried the rip the skin off. They sedated her so she wouldn't hurt herself anymore. Dr. Kalonia said the tumor is bigger and that her hallucinations mean that she is closer to death now. They might have to put her on life support until the babies can be born."

"Ben, I'm sorry. You know you can have anything you need."

"I just need you to tell me, mom. Is this my fault?," Ben said as the tears came faster.

"What do you mean, Ben?"

"All the horrible things I've done, people I've killed, what I did to Han! Did I curse Nat to suffer like this? This should be happening to me! I'm the evil one! She is one of the best people I've ever met and I did this to her!"

"Ben, this is not your fault! I can't say I know why it's happening, but you didn't cause it! Natalie loves you and she saved you! She gave you a second chance to be a better man and a father to those children! She'd never blame you and she wouldn't want you to blame yourself either!"

"Mom, if you could have saved Han, would you have done it? No matter the cost to you or others."

"Ben, I miss your father everyday and I wish I could have saved him. But I know he sacrificed himself to save you because he thought he needed to make up for not being there for you as a father. If I had saved him, you wouldn't be here now. You may not have met Natalie. Different choices make for different outcomes. "

"Maybe Nat would have been better off never having met me!"

"Ben, stop this! You need to be strong for Natalie and those babies. She needs your support now more than ever. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Those babies are gonna be her final gift to you. Don't waste this opportunity!"

"Mom, she always saw me as better than I am. How can I live up to that?"

"You do it because she thought you could do it!"

"I need and love her so much! She makes me stronger. I don't know if I can do it without her!"

"We will help you, Ben. I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angst, angst, angst! I promised it and here it is!!


	38. The One Who Is My Soulmate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie's dying. The babies are born. Snoke comes to claim what is owed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of angst in this chapter. You have been warned!! You might need tissues for this one.

Ben could sense that Nat had awoken before Dr. Kalonia contacted Leia so he headed back to the med bay. He could hear Nat screaming before he got to her room. "How dare you restrain me? You have no right to do this to me! I've done nothing wrong! Where is my husband?"

"Nat, I'm here! Please don't yell at them, baby. They are just doing their job.," Ben said as he could see the soft restraints they had on her arms and legs.

"I wanna go home, please! I'll be good! I need to get out of here! Please, Ben!"

"Nat, you tried to hurt yourself. You can't go home yet."

"Ben, don't leave me here! I'll die if you leave me! They want to kill me!"

Ben tried to stay calm for her. "Baby, no one wants to kill you. They just want to help. I promise. I won't leave you. Let me talk to the doctor.," Ben said as he got closer to her to stroke her hair and kiss her face. 

"Ben, please. I need to leave now. Please tell them to let me out. I just need you to take care of me.," Natalie said as she seemed to calm down.

"I promise I'll take care of you, baby. I'll be right back. Just relax for me."

He met Dr. Kalonia outside the room out of Nat's earshot. "I know I can't take her home like this, but can we maybe put her in the far corner of the med bay away from the other patients? I need the largest bed you can find for us. I'll stay with her and as long as I'm with her you don't have to use the restraints."

"We can try it, Ben. She's still very unstable. I'm not sure even you can handle her for much longer."

"I hope you're wrong. "

Ben goes back to talk to Natalie. "Baby, we're gonna be moved to a more private area in the med bay. I'll stay with you all the time. I won't leave you."

"You promise?"

"Yes, I promise. You know you can trust me, right?"

"Yes, Ben. You're the only one I trust. I love you."

"I love you, Nat. I will always love you."

They moved Ben and Natalie to the area of planned med bay expansion. It was well equipped, but construction was still unfinished. Natalie's interactions with the staff improved for a time, but her paranoia worsened. She would only let them do their jobs if Ben was right there with her. She wouldn't accept or eat the food unless Ben was there and told her it was ok. Ben had to take a very active role in her care. He laid in bed with her to calm her. He continued his habit of massaging her until she fell asleep. Nat did well with this until she didn't.  
Seizures became more regular and longer. Her behaviors started getting worse. 

"I have monsters growing inside me! They'll die if I starve them! I'll be safe if I don't eat the food! They just want to poison me anyway!"

Ben was shocked at the craziness of her paranoia. "You don't have monsters inside you. They are our babies. You can't starve them, Nat. The food isn't poisoned. I would never let them poison you."

"Then why does my head hurt so much! It has to be poison!"

"Baby, your head hurts because you have a brain tumor that is getting bigger."

"If I have a tumor, why don't they remove it? The poison must have caused the brain tumor!"

"I promise you that I won't let anyone poison you. I need you to trust me, Nat. I would never let anyone harm you."

"When can I go home, Ben? Why do we have to stay here in this prison?"

"It's not a prison. They are giving you and the babies medical care."

"How can I have babies? I went through menopause! I can't have babies! They are poisoning me and you are helping them! You said you would protect me! Why are you lying to me, Ben? You want to leave me for someone else! You want to divorce me!," Natalie said with tears running down her face.

"No, baby! I love you! I would never leave you! You can trust me! Please calm down before you hurt yourself."

"I can't trust you! You are helping them to kill me like you killed your father! I hate you! This is all your fault!"

Ben tried to calm himself, but he started crying because of the hurtful things she was saying but didn't really mean. "Baby, please! Listen to me! I love you and I'm trying to keep you safe. You don't know what you're saying. It's the tumor that is making you say these things. Let me help you."

"I want you to kill me, Ben! I can't take it anymore! My head hurts so much! I just want it to stop, please! Stop hurting me, Ben!"

Ben couldn't take it anymore and he raised his hand to the side of Natalie's head to steal her consciousness while he held her in his arms. He had promised Natalie he would never use the Force on her in this way again, but the person he made the promise to was probably never coming back to him. Ben wept into her neck as he held her, mourning the loss of her mind before her body died. She was suffering so much now and nothing he was doing helped. When she awoke, she would likely devolve into the same behaviors. 

Ben, of course, thought of Snoke's offer. He hadn't spoken to Snoke in months. He couldn't bring Snoke into everyone's life again. It would only end badly. But Nat would still be alive to be a mother to his children and his wife. He shouldn't go down this road. Maybe Nat would calm down after some rest and she would talk with some sense. Maybe he needed rest so he could better focus on her needs. He placed her on their bed and placed himself behind her to hold her in his arms. Soon he drifted off to sleep. 

______________________________________________________________________________

A few days later, Natalie went into status epilepticus and then fell into a coma. They put her on life support. The babies were fine, but they needed to be delivered soon so the obstetrician scheduled a C-section. Ben was beside himself. Leia, Luke, and Rey tried to support him as much as possible. The babies were already strong in the Force so he knew they would be fine. Once they were born, Nat would likely die. They were bonded, but the loss of the bond would crush him and he would still have two babies to take care of. 

______________________________________________________________________________

 

Snoke was yet again disappointed, but not really surprised in his apprentice Kylo Ren. Kylo chose to let his wife die instead of accepting his gracious offer. Snoke could feel through their bond that Kylo's wife was not long for this world and that their children were about to enter the world. No matter what Snoke always had alternate plans to choose from. He was comfortably on his way in his Mega Star Destroyer to the Ileenium system which was home to the Resistance base to collect his prize and no one would keep him from it. He had briefed the Knights of Ren on the particulars of their assignment and there would be no diversions from his plans this time. 

______________________________________________________________________________

Ben sat by Natalie's side, stroked her hair, and kissed her face during the delivery of their babies. He spoke to her like she could hear him and let her know everything the doctor was doing as he did it. Leia was in the delivery room for support and because she of course wanted to see her grandchildren born. Han Alexander Solo was born first with an angry cry that instantly reminded both Ben and Leia of the baby's grandfather. The doctor handed him to Ben and he cried tears of joy and sadness. He held the baby up so Natalie could see him if such a thing was possible in her state and then gave Xander back to the doctor. Alexandria Amidala Solo was born 10 minutes later with a healthy screech. When the doctor placed her in Ben's arms, she immediately quieted down and showed herself to be daddy's girl already. Leia could see that the child already had Ben wrapped around her finger. Ben showed Natalie their baby girl and hoped for a response that wasn't forthcoming. Ben handed Lexi back to the doctor and took his place beside Nat. "You did so good, baby. They're beautiful. I love you so much" He lingered to stroke her hair and kiss her face.  
The doctor finished sewing her up and left the room to give Ben some privacy. Leia knew Natalie's time was coming to an end, but she needed to get Ben to bond with the babies as much as possible. 

"Ben, the babies need you. You can come back to Natalie later." Ben knew in his heart that there wasn't much later left, but he did need to be with his children now. He placed one last kiss to Nat's forehead and went to the nursery. The nurses had cleaned, fed, and swaddled the babies before placing them in their cribs. They both slept peacefully. Nat needed him to be the best father he could to them. They needed it. On instinct, he picked up both children as they slept. Lexi and Xander's eyes both opened and looked at him. Their father. He'd never dreamed that anyone would ever call him father. It is happening now and he had to rise to the challenge. Leia looked on with pride and sadness. She wished Han could have been here to see his grandchildren born, but she knew if he was here that they probably would never have been born. 

Ben stared at his children's faces. Nat was right. They were the best combination of both of them. He wouldn't have to worry about their ears, noses, and faces because their mother's softer features had melded with his harder ones. He could definitely see them both in his children. They were the most precious things in his life except for Nat. He just needed to make sure he remembered that when things got tougher. And they would very soon.

______________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben got lost in his children for a while and began to forget some of his worry…..until he sensed a change in his bond with Nat. Dr. Kalonia came in to the nursery. "Ben, Natalie's awake and she's asking for you and the children."

Ben would have run with the children in his hands if he hadn't reminded himself to be better about controlling his tendency toward impulsivity. He was a father now. He gently placed the children in their cribs and Leia followed so they could each take a crib to Natalie's room. He opened the room door with crib in tow and his wife looked at him with tired eyes. "Hi baby.," she croaked with a voice raw from being intubated. Ben's heart skipped a beat. He tried not to be overwhelmed, but tears started to roll down his face. He left the crib and went over to his wife's bedside to kiss her gently. "Hi honey, I brought Lexi and Xander to see you. They're so beautiful, baby. They can't wait to meet you."

"Can you help me hold them, Ben?"

"Yes, of course.," He picked up Xander first. He placed him in the crook of her left arm and supported him with his large hand. Nat was too weak to hold him on her own. She stroked Xander's face with her fingers and kissed his head. "He's gonna be a heartbreaker like his daddy. Leia, can you take him so I can see my daughter, please?"

Leia took Xander from Ben's hands and placed him in his crib. Ben picked up Lexi and placed her in the crook of Nat's left arm and again supported her with his large hand. Nat stroked Lexi's face with her fingers and kissed her head as well. "Try not to threaten the boys that chase after her too much, Ben." Ben laughed through his tears as he could see himself in the overprotective father role with Lexi more than Xander.

Natalie was so obviously exhausted and in pain. Ben knew she was barely hanging on. "Leia, could I please have some time with Ben? Can you get the babies back to the nursery please?" Leia secured the babies in their cribs. She came over to Natalie's bedside. "Of course, dear. Thank you for all you've done for my family." She kissed and hugged Natalie for the last time.

Ben's breath hitched and Leia exited the room with the children. Poe met her on the other side of Natalie's room door. "I'm very sorry, General Organa, but we have a problem."

_______________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben grabbed a chair and sat next to Natalie's bedside. "Thank you for bringing them to see me, Ben.," Nat's voice cracked.

"You want some water, baby? Something for pain?"

"No, I just need you right now. Can you pick me up and sit me in your lap?"

He obliged her as he was want to do. He cradled her in his arms. "Will I see you again, baby? In the Force?," Natalie croaked as tears streamed down her face.

Ben looked deeply in her eyes with his face soaked in tears. "Yes, please wait for me. It may take me a while, but I promise I'll be there."

"When you're ready, go back to my home to visit. I left something for you and the kids there. Something for you to remember me by."

"Yes, we will, baby."

"Kiss me goodbye now. I'll be waiting for you to kiss me hello when I see you again, Ben." Ben kissed Nat deeply at first and softened his kiss as he sensed her increasing weakness. Their breaths mingled and he inhaled her last breath as she exhaled it. He held his breath for as long as he could cause he didn't want to let her essence go. When he could hold the breath no longer, he exhaled and let out a strangled cry against her face where his fresh tears merged with her slowly drying ones. He held her tightly in his arms for what seemed like forever. When he felt like he could handle it, he stood up with her and placed her back in bed. He smoothed and stroked her hair and kissed her beautiful face for the last time. Leia burst in the door. "Ben, I'm sorry. We have to leave now! Snoke is here!."

________________________________________________________________________________

Snoke met again with the Knights who he had given this assignment. "Get down to the planet's surface and get me what I've come for! Kill anyone who gets in your way! Failure will not be tolerated! My quarry is not to be harmed in any way, not a scratch! Is that clear?"

"Yes, Supreme Leader!" The knights answered in unison before they left the ship to perform their tasks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally cried while writing this. It tugged on my heart strings. Sorry not sorry for the cliffhanger!


	39. The One I Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Knights of Ren land on the Resistance base. Snoke shows up looking for what's his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben, Luke, and Rey fight some Knights of Ren. Snoke needs something, but Ben doesn't know what.

Ben ran faster than he'd ever run to the nursery to check on the babies. He breathed a huge sigh of relief to find them there and crying. Leia finally showed up behind him at the nursery. Luke and Rey show up a moment later. 

"Mom, I need you to take the babies please. I think Snoke is here for me, but if he finds me with the babies I'm sure he'll take them too. Once me, Luke, and Rey handle the Knights, I'll contact you from my ship to get the coordinates to the new base."

"Ben, are you sure you're up to this? You're still grieving.," Luke says as he put his hand on Ben's shoulder.

"I promised Nat I would be the best father I could to my children. Right now that means I need to grieve later, make sure they're safe, and take care of Snoke as soon as possible."

"You don't have a light saber.," Rey says.

"I don't need one right now. The Knights aren't Force sensitive, but they have some dangerous weapons. I'll make do."

"I'll protect them with my life, Ben.," Leia says.

"Thank you, mom. Let's go!"

_______________________________________________________________________________

 

4 Knights of Ren disembarked their ship and went on to their separate tasks. Ben, Luke, and Rey found their ship and tried to trace the Knights to their locations separately. The planet was busy with ships evacuating to the new base, but Snoke didn't seem to be interested in them. The Mega Star Destroyer just sat in orbit. Ben was confused by Snoke's tact. He had nothing to leverage over Ben anymore unless he was going for the babies and as far as he knew Leia had already escaped with his children. If it came to it, Ben would sacrifice himself to save his children without question. If all he wanted was Ben, Snoke wouldn't have had to make the trip himself. He could have contacted Ben directly through their bond. 

"Kylo Ren! Former master of the Knights of Ren! Good to see you, old friend!"

"Jorah Ren, you know we were never friends! Come to take me back to Snoke, have you?"

"Snoke did always favor you above all for some strange reason! I always knew you were soft! You got married and had kids! So how's the wife? Dead I heard! Couldn't happen to a nicer guy!"

Ben seethed. "How do you intend to get me back to Snoke, Jorah? Do you think I'll come willingly?"

"No, I didn't. It might be more fun if you didn't, Kylo!," Jorah said.

Sandor and Varys Ren came out of the shadows to assist Jorah and they surrounded Ben. They all had riot weapons and blasters. Ben was confident he could take them all in hand to hand combat, but if they used weapons it might be difficult. His training had fallen by the wayside since Nat got sick. He could use the Force, but that's difficult when people are coming from different directions. 

They chose to attack him all at once. Jorah tried to punch him in the face, but Ben blocked it. Sandor hit Ben on the back of the head and Varys hit him on the backs of his knees. Ben fell to the ground as they all started to kick him. "I really wanted you to put up more of a fight, Kylo! But I can't complain about an easy day!," Jorah said.

"We've got company!," Sandor said.

Rey and Luke joined the party. "Well if it isn't the last Jedi and the little girl who kicked Kylo's ass!," Varys said.

"You ok, Ben?," Luke said. 

"Why don't you boys leave him alone and try your odds against an old man and a little girl?," Rey said.

"Sandor? Varys? Handle them while I finish up with our buddy Kylo here!,"

Luke and Rey mix it up with Sandor and Varys. 

"Kylo, you had everything given to you on a silver platter and you turned your back on it. Snoke still wants you. What makes you so special?," Jorah said to Ben's face.

"I don't need to be special anymore. I just need to be me.," Ben said before he headbutted Jorah. Jorah fell onto his back and Ben pounced on him. Ben proceeded to beat Jorah's face to a pulp. He would have continued if Luke hadn't stopped him. All the Knights were down and incapacitated. 

"Should we be expecting anymore of your friends, Ben?"

"These are all the ones I knew plus the ones that kidnapped Nat. Snoke could have had some in waiting. This doesn't make sense. I'm missing something. I need to get back to the babies. We can discuss everything later. I assume you both are taking the Falcon. I'll take my ship and meet you at the new base."

________________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben got his ship in the air and left the planet. He tried contacting Leia, but got no response. When he contacted the Falcon, Rey gave him the coordinates for the new planet, but neither she nor Luke had heard from his mother either. Ben was starting to worry and Snoke's Mega Destroyer had left orbit. He couldn't take it if he lost his children and his wife on the same day. He'd land on the new planet and if he couldn't speak with Leia, then he'd track down Snoke's Destroyer. 

_________________________________________________________________________________

Snoke was very pleased with Arya Ren's work. It was unfortunate that the rest were detained. He had new plans to reform the Knights of Ren with a new master when things settle down. He dropped his quarry off with some friends, but he'll be keeping a close eye on the recently dead Natalie Solo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck at fight scenes!! Of course, I had to show my raging Throner!! Feel free to give me some pointers!!


	40. The One I Want To Be Proud of Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben is being fatherly. Snoke does something unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben settles in to fatherhood. Snoke may have made a mistake.

Ben, Luke, and Rey reunited with Leia and the Resistance on their new base. He made a beeline for Leia and the babies. The babies were just fine except for some crankiness. There were very few reported casualties and the Mega Destroyer did not interfere with any of the evacuating ships. 

Ben knew that Leia would be busy with organizational meetings for days due to their unplanned evacuation. That meant he probably wouldn't have much help with the babies for a while. It didn't bother him. He needed to be with them now. Nat would want it this way. He would have to leave his grief until he was alone and the babies were asleep. He regretted leaving Natalie's body on the old base. If Snoke hadn't pulled what he did, he would have made sure she was properly buried and maybe even arranged a ceremony. He knew Nat wouldn't have cared about that as long as the babies were safe. 

He knew that he needed some new quarters, but he wouldn't bother Leia with this now. His ship should be sufficient for now. He made sure that when it was put together that it was more than comfortable. The bed was big and the babies could sleep with him. He'd just need to arrange for their food and diapers. The med bay should have a supply of both things. 

When things settled down, he should go to Nat's home like she suggested. Twitch would hate knowing that Nat was gone, but he'd love to see the babies. It would probably be a good idea to make his and the babies' home there and he could visit his family. Leia would miss her grandchildren, but Ben thought she would understand. 

He missed Nat so much. He needed to focus on the babies for now. Nat would be proud of his maturity. 

____________________________________________________________________________________

 

Natalie awoke to the feeling of multiple people's hands on her body. Who were these people? Her last memory was of kissing Ben while she was taking her last breath. How could she still be alive? Her hair had been shaved off and she had a scar on her scalp. She was wearing something like a hospital gown. 

"Ben? Are you here? Ben? Where are my children? Where am I? Who are you people?"

"Natalie, welcome back to the land of the living." Natalie turned to the projected blue light that looked like the form of a very tall old man.

"Who are you?"

"Your husband Ben has told you of me. I am Supreme Leader Snoke!"

"Why am I here with you? Do you have Ben and my children?"

"These scientists have cured you of your brain tumor. Ben and your children are still with the Resistance. They are safe for now. "

"Why would you have cured me? I died. So you brought me back from the dead to cure me. What do you get out of this?"

"I find you to be very interesting, Natalie Solo. Ben chose his wife well."

"So you did this so you could get Ben to give you what you want which is to snatch his body."

"I made him a good offer which he chose to ignore. I think if we discuss it, you will see that the offer is legitimate."

"So you want to threaten me? I need to convince Ben to accept your offer or what? You'll hurt my family?"

"I don't want to threaten you, Natalie."

"If you don't want to threaten me, then why did you send Knights to kill me?"

"I promise you that was a misunderstanding. You were not to be hurt."

"But I was hurt and almost raped! You cannot be trusted! Ben knows you can't be trusted! You wasted your time on this Frankenstein experiment! Let me die in peace!"

"Your husband chose to let you die. You should be angry with him!"

"Well, I'm not angry with him! I'm angry with you for doing this to me! You had no right to touch me!"

"I understand your anger, but we are here now. We might as well make the most of this situation."

"If I'm ever in the same room with you, Snoke! I'll make it my mission to kill you if it is the last thing I do!"

Snoke could feel a disturbance building in the Force and it was coming from Natalie.

"You have great power emanating from you, my dear. Focus so that you can control it."

"You think I will ever trust you? You didn't even grace me with your presence! I guess Supreme Leaders don't lead from the front."

"We shall meet face to face when the time is right, Natalie."

"I will not be used by you!"

"Natalie, I'm warning you! The power you can wield now is unstable! You need to control your emotions!"

"You can't tell me what to do, Snoke!" The energy built up in Natalie's body and slowly rolled out from her to touch the scientists that surrounded her. As the wave touched them, they disintegrated. The wave continued until all the scientists were dead.

_________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben was sleeping in his bed on the ship with the babies. All of a sudden, he felt a disturbance in the Force and Force bond reopened. He startled awake. "Nat? She's alive! She's still alive!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you didn't catch on, it was a force repulse that happened. Snoke done fucked up!!


	41. The One Who Came Back To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie is back, Snoke probably regrets it, but Ben doesn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalie and Snoke become conditionally friendly. Natalie and Ben have a sort of reunion.

What the fuck just happened? How could his wife be alive? He felt her die when he inhaled her last breath as they kissed. If she's alive, then she's alone on the abandoned Resistance base. He had to go back for her now.

"Ben. I'm not there.," Natalie projected into his mind.

"Nat! How is this possible?"

"It was Snoke, Ben. He brought me back. Listen, I know this is crazy and we need to talk. I can't do that right now, but I need you to trust me. I love you and I will come back to you as soon as I can. Just keep our kids safe and tell no one about this for now."

Ben was flabbergasted and he wanted his wife back home as soon as possible. "Baby, I do trust you. Please come back to me safe. I love you."

Natalie closed the bond for now. She was pacing back and forth in the room where she had just killed the scientists trying to piece things together. "Snoke, you still there?"

"Yes, I am."

"Was what happened to those men a surprise to you or is that the reason you didn't meet me face to face?"

"I suspected you had some power, yes. I had not anticipated something quite like this."

"Did you do this to me?"

"No, I contracted the scientists and doctors for the resurrection. To my knowledge, there is no way to imbue a non Force user with the Force."

"So that is why you sent the Knights after me? To see what I could do."

"They were a test, yes. They were not supposed to harm you in anyway. They got carried away in their distaste for your husband."

"What am I? Not a Force user like the Skywalkers. Something else."

"I believe you are a descendant of Abeloth. She's an ancient Force user that has been able to use many forms. She was very powerful indeed."

"More powerful than you?"

Snoke avoided answering that question. "She is likely the one who brought you and your husband together to end her pursuit by Skywalker. She may have also guided my involvement in your resurrection."

"How is Luke involved?"

"He is the one who killed her."

"So she arranged for me to meet Ben so that Luke would be less likely to kill her again?"

"It seems that was her plan."

"Why did I just get powers now?"

"I suspect that this was for evolutionary advantage. I know you have suffered much in your life, Natalie. A person such as yourself who has been able to survive all that would be a wonderful vessel for the Force, light or dark."

"Why are you telling me all this, Snoke? You could play it close to the vest and string me along a bit longer. Isn't that usually your game?"

"Even now, in it's nascent stage, I can sense your power is increasing. You would know if I was lying."

"So what now? What do you want from me, Snoke? You gonna try to snatch my body now?"

"I'm sure Abeloth would not allow that, my dear. If you're amenable, I can teach you some ways to control your powers until you fully come into them."

"You don't seem broken up at all about the friends I just killed."

"They were merely instruments, tools to be used for my purposes. Perhaps you will come to learn that some people in your life can only function as such. I can't help but notice that you are also not broken up about those men."

Natalie ignored that statement. "If we're friends, at least conditionally now, I'd love to leave this hellhole and get some comfortable quarters. Maybe some clothes that don't have my ass hanging out."

"Of course, my dear. I will have my people escort you to some suitable quarters and provide you with clothing to wear. We will continue this discussion later."

The locked door of her holding area unlocked and she was able to leave the room. One of Snoke's people escorted her to a large lavish room with a huge bed and many amenities. Within minutes, she was provided with clothing that could fit her perfectly. If nothing else, Snoke had taste. She shed the hospital gown and got in the shower. She brushed her teeth and got ready for bed. 

Natalie really missed Ben and the kids. Things have gotten really complicated. She didn't want to be in this position, but it seemed the universe had other plans for her. Snoke wasn't to be trusted generally, but he could be useful for now. She'd never let him get his hands on Ben or the kids. He was right about the men she killed though. It didn't bother her that she killed them. She was keeping herself safe and they had no right to do what they did. Unfortunately, Snoke hadn't been there, but then he wouldn't have been able to give the information she was seeking. 

Natalie reopened her bond with Ben. "Ben, you awake?"

"Yes, baby. I was worried. You closed the bond! Why?"

"I'm sorry. I just needed to focus on what was happening here. I'll try to keep it open as often as I can. How are the babies?"

"I just fed them, changed their diapers, and put them back to sleep."

"Ben, you're already such a good father. Is Leia helping you?"

"She's really busy after the evacuation, but I'm sure she won't mind when things slow down. Me and the babies are fine. Don't worry. Please tell me what's happening with you."

"Well, I guess I should start from the beginning. Snoke sent some Knights to pick up my dead body so he could resurrect and cure me. He hired a bunch of scientists and doctors to do it. When I woke up, my hair was gone and I had a new scar. The scientist and doctors were touching me. Snoke was there by hologram. I freaked out. I was looking for you and the kids. Snoke said you were with the Resistance still. I talked with Snoke and I got more and more angry. The anger built up and it came out of me. I killed all the men who were in the room with me."

"Did they hurt you?"

"I assume they were all just doing the job Snoke hired them for. I didn't mean to, but I couldn't control it, Ben."

"So you can use the Force now, Nat?"

"Yes. Snoke says he thinks I'm a descendant of someone named Abeloth. Have you heard of her?"

"I've heard my uncle mention her a few times, but I learned to tune that out. He and my dad used to speak about their glory days."

"Snoke said she was very powerful and that your uncle killed her. He thought she must have found some way to cheat death. He even said that she probably guided him to do what he did to me and that she was likely responsible for bringing us together to keep Luke from killing her again."

"She was the cause of the dreams then?"

"Snoke thought so."

"So you spoke with him quite a bit then."

"Unfortunately, I had to. I didn't know what was happening to me and I thought he had caused it."

"You can't trust Snoke, Nat! He always has an agenda."

"I know, baby. Don't worry. I'm trying to formulate a plan to get out of here and get back to you."

"I don't care if you have to blow up 5 planets to come back to me, Nat! Do what you have to do to stay safe!"

"I will, baby! I miss you so much. If we both get in front of mirrors, could we actually see each other?"

"It's worth a try. Hold on." They both got to mirrors and concentrated on their projections in attempts to see each other through their bond.

"It's working, Ben! I can see you!" Natalie could see Ben just like he was there with her. His shoulder length black hair, his soulful brown eyes tired from dealing with the babies, his lovably long nose, the scar that ran from his right shoulder through the right eye without disrupting his vision, the moles and freckles dotting his face, his pouting lips, and even his large ears were poking out. She wished she could just touch him.

Ben could see her as well. Her raven hair was gone. Her head was bald with a long scar that ran from her left temple to the base of her skull, he could see the familiar scar that ran from her right temple down to her jaw, the olive skin of her beautiful face also dotted with moles and freckles, her cute nose, her soft lips. His hand itched to reach out to her. "I see you too, baby. You look so beautiful."

"Baby, when we get out of this we have to go back to my home. It will be safer for us there."

"We probably shouldn't have come back no matter what grandfather said."

"Well, I'm trying to formulate some plans to get out of here."

"Snoke is gonna be difficult for you to deal with."

"I know but when we talked I could sense his overwhelming fear."

"What is Snoke afraid of, Nat?"

"Me, Ben."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abeloth is a character from the Fate of the Jedi series. Not sure if they plan on mentioning her in this sequel trilogy, but it would be cool if they did. She is considered one of the most powerful Force users of all time. Hope you guys are enjoying my use of her!!


	42. The One I Have Another Chance With

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie discuss going home. Snoke gets desperate.

"Nat, if Snoke is afraid then that only means trouble for us! You need to come home now!," Ben said.

"What if this is why I'm here, why Anakin told me to come back? I can destroy Snoke and save the galaxy!," Natalie said.

"Fuck the galaxy! Fuck Snoke! Please baby, forget this! We just need us and the babies! Just our family! We can just go back to our home and get away from this bullshit!"

"What if I can't do that, Ben? There has to be a reason for me to end up with these powers now. Even you couldn't just walk away from the Force. You can't ask me to do this!"

"I didn't have you and the kids then. Now we both have something bigger than us to think about."

"Baby, I know you're scared of losing me again, but--"

"Of course, I'm fucking scared! I thought I lost you forever! Now you're back and I just need you with me, with us!"

"I know, baby. Unfortunately, we have Snoke to thank for me being back. If we hadn't come, I would still be dead."

Ben knew this to be true, but he still wanted Nat back with him. "So what is your plan then?"

"I'm not sure yet, but just give me some time. We can fix this shit and get back to our lives." Natalie concentrated on where Ben was and she wished she could be there with him now. All of a sudden, she felt like she was traveling through the time portal again. She was a bit disoriented, but she came back to herself and realized that she was on Ben's ship. She was very sick to her stomach and needed the toilet now. She ran to the refresher and saw Ben there.

"Nat! What the fuck? How did you get here so fast?"

"Toilet please!," She practically bowled Ben over and made it to the toilet just in time. Ben stayed with her to make sure she was ok. Natalie finished vomiting and rinsed her mouth out. Ben picked her up into his arms and carried her to the bed where the babies were asleep. 

"This is so crazy! I literally just thought about being here with you and it happened, Ben! Can you do that too?"

"I've never been able to do that or that thing you did to the scientists. I'd love for you to teach me though. Lay down and rest, baby." Ben placed himself behind her in the bed as he always did before. There was plenty of room for all of them in the bed.

"I'm exhausted. I just need to sleep for a little bit.," Natalie said as Ben resumed his massage duties just like old times. Natalie fell asleep in minutes and Ben went to sleep soon after. 

________________________________________________________________________

 

Snoke received word that Natalie Solo seems to have disappeared from her quarters, but no one reported seeing her leave. He offered to help her control her powers in an attempt to keep her under his thumb somehow. His plans were starting to wither on the vine and she was the biggest threat to him even with powers yet to have fully bloomed. 

He had to consider an unconventional tact. He only did this in desperation and he hated being desperate. He at least had to make the effort even if he was to be turned down. He needed an emissary right away. 

_________________________________________________________________________

Natalie woke up what seemed like a few hours later. Both Natalie and Ben had shifted while they slept. They were now facing each other, but Ben was hugging Natalie's middle and she had her hands in his hair. The babies were starting to stir. Ben was right. She couldn't leave them now. Fuck everything else but their family. 

The babies started outright crying and Ben startled out of his sleep. He looked up at Nat like he couldn't believe she was still there. They smiled at each other and both moved to grab a baby. Nat grabbed Xander and Ben grabbed Lexi. The babies were both wet and hungry so Ben grabbed the diapers, wipes, and bottles. Natalie and Ben proceeded to sit next to each other to change the babies and feed them. They stared at each other and kissed quickly while doing their parental duties.

"So do you have the ship fueled and ready to go, baby?," Natalie said with a smile.

"I stayed ready, Nat! We can go after we feed the babies.," Ben said.

"I love you and our children. Let's go home."

"Whatever you say, baby. I love you.," Ben said as he slowly kissed his wife. Ben finished feeding Lexi, put her down on the bed with Nat and Xander, and went through his preflight checks. He started feeling a niggling in his mind from his mother. Probably about the disturbance in the Force. He had to ignore her. He hated to leave this way, but they had to leave now. 

________________________________________________________________________

"Master Skywalker, one of the Knights is asking to speak with you! He says it's extremely important.," Finn said.

"Thank you, Finn. Can you take me to him?," Luke said then he followed behind. 

They reached the detention center and Luke went in to see the prisoner. "Jorah, isn't it? What could be so important for you to need to talk to me now?"

"Grandmaster Jedi Luke Skywalker, we meet again!," Snoke said using the prisoner's face.

"To what do I owe the honor, Snoke! This isn't your usual method of operation. Seems a bit tame for you. Is the prisoner going to try and kill me next?"

"If I wanted you dead, you would be! I'm alerting you to an unfortunate error on my part which has lead to something that concerns you especially. "

"Do tell, just one error, Snoke! You've made many. To which do you refer?"

Snoke was seething that he had brought himself to this low. "I took Natalie Solo's body, resurrected her, and cured her of her ailment to gain an advantage. When she was reanimated, I discovered that she came back with some very strong Force powers that point to her being a descendant of a being you are very familiar with, Abeloth."

"So you want a truce with me so I can chase after Abeloth for you? You must be really desperate to come to me!"

"I think we can both agree that Abeloth is more deadly to the galaxy than I. And I believe you have in your possession the means to destroy her."

"Why should I believe you, Snoke? You've not been a paragon of virtue yourself."

"Feel free to check into it yourself, but I would hurry. She is probably leaving with your nephew and their children right now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Luke and Snoke working together?? Interesting partnership!


	43. The One I Trust More Than Anyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie try to leave. Luke interrupts. Luke and Snoke team up.

Ben was nearly done with his preflight checks when he heard a familiar voice in his mind. 

"Ben, don't go like this. Let me talk to Natalie. I might be able to help her.," Luke said.

Ben looked back to the bedroom where Natalie was with their children. "I don’t know what you're talking about, uncle."

"Snoke came to me. He told me what he did to her and that she's related to Abeloth."

Ben chose to ignore him. He felt him trying to stall for time. They needed to get in the air now. They'll be fine once they're home.

"Ben, please! I know you're scared of losing her again, but if she is who Snoke thinks she is then you may have lost her already!"

Ben's ship lifted off the ground slowly. Luke was making his way toward the airfield with Leia and Rey in tow. Luke tried to keep the ship on the ground with all the power he could summon from the Force. Ben tried to compensate by boosting the thrusters, but it wasn't working. Natalie had heard their exchange and felt she needed to involve herself now. She could sense that Luke didn't mean her any harm, but he wanted to make sure that Abeloth stayed dead. 

"Baby, set the ship down. I'll talk to him."

"Nat, just stay on the ship! I won't let him touch you!"

"I won't let him touch me. I will be fine. I promise you. When I'm done with Luke, we will go home.," Natalie said as she stroked his facial scar and kissed his cheek then his lips slowly.

Ben set the ship down and cut off the engine. He opened the ship door and ramp. He stayed on the ship with the babies. Natalie made her way down the ramp and Luke walked toward her. "That's far enough. You said you wanted to talk, so talk."

Luke could feel the familiar power rolling off of her as it did Abeloth. "Natalie, I'm sorry that Snoke did this to you. I want to try to help you."

"You're sorry. Yet you aligned yourself with Snoke and you stink of the same fear and desperation that he did!"

"I have not aligned with him. He came to me and told me what he thought you were and being here near you, I know that he was right."

"Don't you care that your nephew loves me? I brought him back to your family and our families have joined now."

"Abeloth cannot be allowed to continue."

"So what do you plan to do, Jedi? Kill me again in front of your family. Abeloth is a part of me, but I can make my own choices," Natalie said as her eyes turned black.

"I don't want to kill you, Natalie. I want to help you, but I'm not sure how. I need some time to research some things."

"You have no time. This meeting was a courtesy. We are leaving now. I wouldn't try to stop the ship this time."

"I can't let you leave, Natalie."

"You don't have to let me leave. We are leaving and not coming back here. You won't have to worry about us anymore, Skywalker."

"You can't leave!"

"Luke, if we were alone, you would have made your move already. You feel ashamed because your family is here. What's it to be? The Force? The blaster on your hip? Your light saber on the opposite hip? Or the dagger of Mortis? You thought I didn't know you came prepared to kill me! I gave you the courtesy of this meeting, but my patience is wearing thin. Make your move so I can make mine!"

Luke ignited his light saber and he could hear the gasps from Leia and Rey. Natalie used the Force to take his light saber away and hold it to Luke's throat. "I don't want to kill you, Luke. But I will if you insist on this vendetta against Abeloth. You beat her and then she found a way to beat you. Live with it or don't! I'm getting on this ship with my family and if I see you again, be better prepared to fight me! Share that with Snoke!"

Natalie strode back on the Ben's ship maintaining the light saber at Luke's neck wherever he turned and she saw Ben just inside the door. She put her arms around him and he relaxed. "Time to go home, baby.," Natalie said to Ben. Ben retracted the ramp and closed the ship door. Natalie went back to the bedroom with the babies. Ben restarted the ship and it took off without problems this time. They left the planet's atmosphere and he set coordinates for their destination. He started the autopilot and joined Natalie and their kids in the bedroom. 

"You know I would have understood if you'd killed him, baby."

"Ben, I know but some part of you would always wonder if you could trust me. If I see either Luke or Snoke again, they're dead! We have to protect our family at all costs, understand?"

"Yes, baby, I do. You hungry? That shit with Luke and the fact that you threw up earlier, should make you ravenous."

"I'm starving as a matter of fact and we should both eat while the babies are asleep. We should also get some sleep while they're asleep, too!"

 

_____________________________________________________________________________

"Luke, what the fuck were you thinking teaming up with Snoke against your own family? What is it with you Skywalkers and Solos that you either have to carve each other up or kill each other?," Rey said.

"Luke, Natalie could have killed you and I'm not so sure she shouldn't have!," Leia said.

"I wish I could tell you how much danger the galaxy will be in if Abeloth stays alive!," Luke says.

"So you want to kill Natalie again and the babies too?," Rey said. 

"It isn't what I want. It is what has to be done.," Luke said.

"I won't be a part of this! I should just go back to Jakku where I was better off!," Rey said.

"Luke, if you continue with this, I can't forgive it! That woman has done nothing to deserve this. I understand why she and Ben just wanted to be left in peace to raise their children.," Leia said. 

"You think I don't know how much of a monster I appear to be? Especially being involved with Snoke. I know this sounds crazy, but neither of you have the experience that I have had with Abeloth. If I have to do this on my own, then I am prepared to do it because I know what is at stake if I don't make sure she stays dead."

Luke went back to talk to the prisoner, hoping that Snoke was still there. 

"Grandmaster Jedi Skywalker, I assume she won that battle based on your look of worry."

"Do you know where they're going, Snoke?"

"Of course, I do! I can give you the coordinates and meet you there so we can get rid of Abeloth once and for all!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting hard to know who to root for?? I like it messy!!


	44. The One I Will Risk Everything For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie strategize. Ben and Natalie meet with Hux and Phasma

Ben, Natalie, Xander, and Lexi were all sleeping peacefully in Ben's enormous bed on his ship on the way to the planet that housed the time portal. All of a sudden, Natalie awoke with black eyes eventually returning to their natural brown color. She gently shook Ben to wake him. "Ben, I need you to get up now."

"What, baby? You alright?," Ben said sleepily.

"Snoke gave Luke the coordinates for the planet. They are coming for us!"

"Fucking Snoke! I should have let you stay a little longer to kill him! I wish I would have killed him myself!"

"How much longer before we're at the planet?"

"About 2hrs."

"Can you divert us to a safe place while we try to come up with a plan?"

"Uh, yeah. Let me get up to the pilot's chair so I can get the lay of the land.," Ben said as he kissed Nat on her lips, got up from the bed, and went to the cockpit. Ben found a few possibilities and he picked the one he was most familiar with from his days as Kylo Ren. He found a safe place to land on the planet and then went about attempting to discuss plans. The babies woke up wet and hungry so they talked as they changed and fed the babies. 

"How messy do you want this to get, Ben?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean how many dead people are you comfortable with."

"As long as we get home safe, I don't care."

"We could contact the Resistance for Luke and the First Order for Snoke. Maybe make our escape while they're all busy with each other, but that would really be dangerous for us, baby."

"Could you just open another portal and get us home that way? We could avoid the conflict all together."

"I thought about that but either Snoke or Luke could actually use the portal and end up in my time which would be really dangerous for all of us. The government would hunt us so someone would end up on a scientist's table and be experimented on because of our powers. Even if it's not us, it would cause us some problems. I could just close it and open another one though. I just don't want to have to keep running. I should probably handle this now before things get worse."

"Nat, how sure are you that you can handle both Luke and Snoke? Your powers are still growing, but they are very powerful Force users in their own right. I know I can't beat both of them, but I am willing to try for us."

"It has to be me. If you fight them, Luke would never hurt you and Snoke is after your body, remember? One of us has to be here for the babies and I think that has to be you. I need you to promise me that you will stay with the babies at all costs. No matter what happens to me. I'm willing to die again for them if I have to."

"Can we come up with a plan where neither of us die or has their body snatched?"

"Ok, let's think critically about this. Luke wants to kill me and the babies, but won't hurt you. Snoke wants to kill me, control the babies if he can, and wants your body. I don't think we can negotiate with Luke at all, but we have a chance with Snoke if he thinks you agree to letting him have your body. Leia and Rey seemed to be on our side, but not sure if we could trust them to help us with Luke. The only ones we haven't come in contact with are the First Order. I'm sure they'd have something to say about Snoke's antics."

"Hux and Phasma are loyal to the First Order, but I know if they could get rid of Snoke, they'd probably jump at the chance.," Ben said as he walked to the cockpit to check their location. "We are about an hour away from what could be considered First Order territory. We could try getting Hux and Phasma at least temporarily on our side for this. We don't need to give them all the details. We could just give them Snoke's location. They are gonna try to see exactly why we need them though."

"How badly will they want to kill you, Ben?"

"They will definitely see me as a traitor, but they know what I'm capable of. They probably won't try to kill me. At least, I hope so for this plan to work. Both of us will have to go which means the babies have to come with us."

"How are you gonna contact them? We can't just go knocking on their door."

"I remember some command codes that will get Hux's attention. I know he'll at least give us an audience."

"Well this will be interesting."

Ben contacted the Finalizer with his command codes. They told him to hold for authorization. Within moments, Hux contacted him on the secure channel. "Kylo Ren, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Hux, we need to talk about Snoke right away!"

"You've been gone for months and with the Resistance reportedly. Why now do we need to discuss anything let alone Snoke?"

"Because you have a chance to destroy him for good. No matter what differences we have had, I know you won't want to pass this up!"

"Why so anxious to help me after all this time, Ren?"

"Obviously, it would benefit all of us. Hux, time is of the essence here. Can we come aboard to discuss this please?"

"And who is we, Ren?"

"I have my family with me, Hux. We need to talk now!"

Hux approved the command codes and allowed Ben's ship to board. Hux and Phasma had the landing area cleared and met the ship. Ben's ship door opened and the ramp descended. Ben and Natalie descended with Lexi and Xander in their arms. 

"Follow me to the conference room, please.," Hux said.

Hux lead them all to the conference room with Phasma in the rear. They all entered to the conference room and everyone took seats. 

"Ren, please introduce your family to us."

"Actually, Hux, it's Ben now. This is my wife Natalie and our children Lexi and Xander."

"I'm Phasma, Natalie. Please forgive me but we heard you'd died."

"I did die, but not for long. Forgive me, but we need to talk about Snoke."

"Please both of you share what you know of Snoke!," Hux said.

"Snoke is on the planet he sent me to before I disappeared. This is the most vulnerable he is ever going to be, Hux." 

"Why are you so anxious to have me get rid of the Supreme Leader, Ben?"

"He ruined my life and the galaxy. Is that not enough?"

"You are very powerful in your own right, Ben. You could get rid of him yourself."

"I have a lot more to protect and lose now, Hux! The bottom line is we both want him dead and you have the means to make that happen!"

"What is in this for you, Natalie?," Hux said.

"Snoke experimented on me and tried to use me against my husband. He is a danger to all of us."

Hux gave her a questioning look, but not because he didn't believe her. There was something else. "Disappointed in my husband's choice, General?," Natalie projected in to Hux's mind. Hux was shaken a bit by it, but was good at covering his reaction with Ben and Phasma. Natalie could see through him. 

"I need some time to think about this.," Hux said.

"Ben and Phasma, Hux and I need to speak alone for a bit. Would you both mind leaving us alone?"

"Nat, what are you doing? We didn't talk about this.," Ben projected into her mind.

"Ben, please trust me. I'm gonna close the bond for a bit and don't cheat by trying to get into Hux's mind. I'll meet you back on the ship.," Natalie projected back and handed him Xander.

"Sir, I think I should stay with you.," Phasma said.

"Phasma, we'll be fine. Why don't you escort Ben and his children back to their ship?"

"Yes, sir."  
____________________________________________________________________

Phasma walked with Ben and the babies back to the ship.

"I never thought I would say this, but you look happy, Ben."

"I will be happier if we didn't have to worry about Snoke anymore."

"Your wife seems to be a good match for you. I couldn't have imagined you as a father."

"I know. I couldn't have imagined any of this for me, but I am glad that it happened and I want to keep what I have now."

"Even though you killed many of my Stormtroopers and actively tried to destroy the ship, I actually missed you, Ben."

"You might find this hard to believe, Phasma, but I missed you too."

_____________________________________________________________________

"Well, Natalie, we are alone now. What did you wish to discuss?"

"Were you ever going to tell him, Hux?"

"Tell who what?"

"Tell Ben that you're in love with him, Hux!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure that you can see my other pseudonym. Couldn't pass up the opportunity to bring in a sniff of Kylux. I don't think it's a spoiler to say it is not actually happening, but it will play a very minor role in the story. Please feel free to comment. I don't mind discussing the story with people.


	45. The One Who Made Me Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie convinces Hux. Hux and Phasma go after Snoke. Leia goes after Luke. Ben and Natalie think of another plan.

Hux said nothing for a moment. "That has no bearing on this situation with Snoke or my decision."

"Of course, it fucking does! Love is the motivation for all of this for me! Ok, cards on the table. I was dead. I was sick. Snoke brought me back to cure me and use me against Ben. What he didn't know was that I'm related to a powerful Force user and when he found out, he wanted to try to use me. I left to rejoin my family and he contacted Luke Skywalker because he killed my relative. So Snoke joined with his enemy to kill me and my children. Bottom line, me and Ben don't want that. We thought that you would take care of Snoke and maybe Luke for us."

"Well, that was a barrage of honesty that I wasn't quite prepared for and thank you for that, but--"

"There is no but, Hux. You're a strategist if nothing else. You will not let this opportunity pass by. I need you to make me a promise. I need you to make sure that nothing happens to my family. Yes, I know I'm using your feelings against you, but you would do the same in my position. "

"When you say protect your family, what do you mean?"

"It is possible that I could die. I have faced that. If something happens to me, I need you to make sure that Ben and my children make it out of this."

Hux thought for a moment. "I promise you that Ben and the children will be safe if something happens to you. Now, we need to make preparations to leave for this planet and destroy Snoke."

"Thank you and this conversation will stay between us, Hux."

"Don't thank me. I don't know how, but I believe you. Ben is lucky to have found you. I do want him to be happy."

"Can you escort me back to the ship, please?"

"Of course."

"Can I tell you something, Hux?"

"Of course."

"You will find someone. You just have to open yourself to it. You should also give up this idea of world domination. You'll be much happier!"

"Maybe someday I'll take that advice!"

They walked the rest of the way to the ship quietly. Hux took Natalie's hand and shook it before heading back to his office. Natalie boarded the ship and Ben was waiting in the bedroom with the sleeping babies.

"Did you enjoy your time with Hux, Nat?"

"I did and I got us what we needed."

"Wow, you got more out of Hux in a few minutes than I ever got out of him in 6 years."

"We just talked strategy, Ben. Don't sell Hux short. Snoke set you both up to be rivals so you wouldn't see how much you actually have in common."

"I don't know about that. You gonna share the details of your conversation?"

"No, but I know you trust me enough to leave it alone."

"I do, baby. I do.," Ben said as he kissed her slowly.

__________________________________________________________________________

Hux calls Phasma to his office. "Sir."

"Phasma, we need to prepare to leave for this planet."

"Sir, what did she say to convince you?"

"I was already convinced. I wanted to learn her story and I did. Now, get your troopers prepared and I'll prepare the crew."

___________________________________________________________________________

 

Leia sat in her office doing no work. She was distraught about how Luke was acting. All of a sudden deciding that Snoke was an ally and that Natalie was an enemy because she was related to a being he had killed. They had just gotten Ben back from Snoke and now she was losing him, his wife, and her grandchildren. Her family was always in turmoil. They were always doomed to be in conflict.

"Unfortunately, that is my fault."

Leia looked up and saw Anakin's Force ghost.

"Why come to me now? You've always come to Luke."

"Luke won't listen to me now. I didn't think you would ever be ready to see me because of what Darth Vader did to you."

"I needed to keep that with me to do what I do. I know that sometimes things happen for a reason."

"You need to stop Luke, Leia!"

"How can I do that? He is obviously a more powerful Force user than me. He ran off to confront Natalie. If he kills Natalie and her children, then he deserves to die."

"He is wrong about Natalie. She is not Abeloth. He is too blinded by his experiences with her to see reason."

"How can I find him? He tore out of here hours ago. He is probably meeting with Snoke right now."

"Contact Ben and Natalie. They know where he is. Only you can make Luke see how wrong he is."

"Thank you, Anakin!"

"May the Force be with you, Leia." With that, Anakin faded away.

Rey knocks and enters the office. "I'm sorry to disturb you, General. I am leaving. I can't stay here anymore. I think I need to find my own way like I always have. I came to ask for a ship."

"Rey, I'm going after Luke. I'd like you to come with me."

"Do you think that is a good idea? Luke was totally out of control and he is meeting up with Snoke. How are we going to stop them?"

"We'll need some Resistance ships as a show of force, but I'll need to get down to the planet to see Luke and I'll need your help if you're willing."

"I'll help you, General. If this doesn't work, then I'll leave. At least we can get a shot at killing Snoke."

___________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben, Natalie, and the babies were resting in bed on Ben's ship. Ben and Natalie were facing each other. He was stroking Natalie's bald scarred head. 

"Do you miss it, Ben?"

"Miss what?"

"My hair.," Natalie laughs.

"I missed you, baby. If you stay bald for the rest of your life, I will still worship you."

"You're worried about our plan."

"I'm just worried period. I'm tired of our family being endangered. I just want us to be safe and happy now."

"Me too."

They heard a beeping noise coming from the cockpit indicating that they were being hailed. Ben left the bedroom to go to the pilot's chair and answer the call. 

"Ben, it's your mother."

"Mom, what's going on?"

"I need you to tell me where Luke is. I'm going after him to stop this."

"You know he's with Snoke, right?"

"Yes, I won't be alone."

Ben gave her the coordinates to the planet where Luke and Snoke were. "May the Force be with you, mom."

"With you as well, Ben."

Ben made his way back to the bedroom to join his family. "You feel guilty, don't you?," Natalie said.

"Yes. It's gonna be a bloodbath, but I don't think we have a choice if we want to get home. I know I said I didn't care, but I do. You are the person who made me care again, Nat. Kylo Ren wouldn't care."

"I care too, baby. So we need another plan then, don't we?"

"Plan for what, baby?"

"To save the galaxy, Ben!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is on a collision course now. This could be really bad, but will it?? Stick around!!


	46. The One Who's Willing to Risk It All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All parties converge.

"How are we gonna save the galaxy and make it home, Nat?"

"I think I should try meditating for a while, try to clear my head, and maybe think of something."

"I'll give you some time alone, baby. I'll watch the kids."

Natalie found the quietest place on the ship and sat cross-legged with her eyes closed. She'd never really attempted this before. It was worth a shot.  
It took her minutes to connect with the Force and go into a state of deep meditation. The Force was beautiful like this. She could get lost in it if there was the time. She could see many souls in the Force, living and dead. If she focused hard enough, she could pick out individuals and hear their thoughts specifically instead of just the mish mash of everyone's thoughts jumbled together. 

She sensed someone was watching, someone familiar. "You've become so powerful so quickly, my child."

"Abeloth?" She appeared to Natalie in the form of a human female with blonde hair and grey eyes.

"Yes, I was wondering when we would meet."

"This is not your true form, is it?"

"Very good. I thought it would be less jarring. This form is of Callista Ming, someone Skywalker was in love with. It is one of the reasons he hates me so much."

"How did you put Ben and I together?"

"Well that is a long story. I left small pieces of myself across the galaxy in my time. Eventually they became incorporated into people's DNA, is what I believe you call it. My DNA was dormant in most people. You have my DNA in you. When Snoke brought you back with my guidance, my qualities were expressed in you. Quite beautifully in fact."

"So Snoke was right about my life experiences being responsible for that expression?"

"Yes, he was. You have had quite a bit of suffering and challenges, my dear and flourished. You are unique and very strong willed. As far as Ben, I've monitored Skywalker's bloodline for sometime in my dormancy. Snoke had done a number on his mind. I guided you two together in order to end the war between myself and Skywalker."

"Why does the pull between me and Ben feel so strong?"

"It's the Force that makes you so connected. The Force wanted this war to end. The Force wants you to heal the galaxy together. I did nothing but make the introduction."

"Did you know Snoke?"

"We never met, but he has some similarities to me. He is much younger than I. I believe you could easily defeat him if you behave smartly."

"What about Luke?"

"He is being blinded by our past together. He could be defeated by you, but he is worth more to the galaxy living than dead. I can't believe I'm saying that, but I'm quite old and tired. I spent my life looking for the acceptance and love that you and Ben share. Look within yourself to figure out a way to defeat Luke without killing him."

"What if he kills me?"

"I think you will not let that happen. The galaxy and your family need you too much, Natalie. I have taken enough of your time, child. You can find your own way from here." Abeloth disappeared from Natalie's meditation vision. 

Natalie continued to meditate for a bit longer and then she brought herself out of it. She headed back to the bedroom where Ben and the kids were sleeping. She looked at them with such love. She didn't want to be away from them if she didn't have to. The babies stirred awake and then so did Ben. "Hey, how was your meditation?," Ben said sleepily.

They both started to grab bottles and diapers for the babies. The babies cried softly. They knew their parents were close and would attend to their needs quickly enough. "I met Abeloth. She answered some questions and gave me some advice."

"What kind of advice?"

"Basically kill Snoke, keep Luke alive if possible."

"Easier said than done, baby."

"I know, but I think I have a plan."

_____________________________________________________________________

 

"Snoke, where are they? They should have been here already.," Luke said.

"Perhaps they are sightseeing since they have no plans to return after they leave, Skywalker. This is where the portal is so they must return here."

"She could probably just open another portal, Snoke."

"True, but she would not anticipate that we would follow."

All of a sudden they could both see First Order TIE fighters entering the planet's atmosphere. "Tell me again about her poor anticipation. She and Ben probably got the First Order here for you. Not a bad plan."

They could also see some X-wings entering the atmosphere as well. "Clearly, we both underestimated them, Jedi."

"Luke, it's over. You must stop this!" 

Luke and Snoke turned to see Leia. "I never thought I would see the day that you would choose that thing over your own family, Luke."

"I'm trying to put the galaxy first, Leia!"

"You must see that Abeloth is much worse than I for the galaxy, General Organa!"

"I see that your meddling in the galaxy has brought us here, Snoke!"

"Well well, I apologize for our lateness to the party. The gang's all here!," Hux says with Phasma in tow.

"What is your interest here, Hux?," Luke said.

"We are here for the Supreme Leader, Jedi.," Hux said.

"I did not call on you, General.," Snoke said.

"I said we are here for you, Snoke. Not to support you.," Hux said as group of Stormtroopers aimed weapons at Snoke. 

"Aah, General, I knew one day you would show your treachery. Still dreaming of being emperor?"

"I am loyal to the First Order. Are you? I think not. Using our resources to chase after a man you now have aligned yourself with. Not bothering to avenge us after Starkiller. You dug your own grave, Snoke. Now we are just here to put you in it."

Resistance fighters came in to view and aimed blasters at the First Order. 

"We have all been manipulated by Abeloth to be in this place and time. I know you realize this, Jedi."

"I regret my place in it and my association with you, Snoke."

"It's not too late for all of you!"

Luke, Leia, Snoke, Hux, and Phasma all turned to see Natalie there. 

"It's time for all of this to end!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalie's got a lot of balls in the air. Will she be able to manage it?


	47. The One Who Can Save The Galaxy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie flexes her muscles. Natalie confronts Luke and Hux. Natalie takes care of Snoke.

"Skywalker, you must kill her while there is still time.," Snoke said.

"Well, Luke, I'm here. Take your best shot.," Natalie said.

"Luke, no! Don't do this. Anakin sent me to stop you. If you do this, I'll never forgive you and your soul will be damned!," Leia said.

"Jedi, if you've lost your nerve, I will finish the task!," Snoke says as he shoots Force lightning in Natalie's direction. Hux, Phasma, and their men move toward Snoke. The Resistance fighters move toward the First Order. Luke tries to grab for Leia to get her out of the way. Natalie manipulates time and slows it to a near crawl. 

She walks toward Luke at a normal pace and touches him to pull him out of the time manipulation. Luke looks at her in amazement and sees the others stuck in time. 

"I could have killed you, but I didn't, Luke!"

"Why?"

"Abeloth said you're more valuable to the galaxy alive than dead. Are you surprised to hear that?"

"I think she still likes to manipulate people as much as ever!"

"No, she wants the galaxy to be safe just like you. She's not looking for the same things anymore. She sees that I'm happy with Ben and our children. It's what she's always wanted. You know it's true."

"How can I ever trust her motivations?"

"You don't have to. Trust mine. I didn't have to bother coming here. Ben and I could have left you all to deal with the coming bloodbath, but we didn't. You all need to work together to keep the galaxy safe."

"Work with Snoke? I know I have lately, but I'm no fool. I knew as soon as you and those children were dead that he would turn on me."

"No, not Snoke. I have plans for him. You need to work with the First Order. "

"Hux blew up 5 planets! We could never work with a mass murderer like him!"

"You and Leia cannot be so naïve as to think that there were only guilty people on those Death Stars! You both have killed innocents! Numbers do not matter! Everyone on both sides has been wronged by the other in some way, shape, or form! It's time to start fresh on an even playing field. All the killing and reprisals for killing have to stop! You all can work together to form a new government."

"So you think it's that easy?"

"Of course not, Luke! But have you ever backed down from a challenge?"

"I'm willing to try, but how do we know we can trust the First Order?"

"Leave that to me. Are we ok now? You still want to kill me?"

"You no longer have anything to worry about from me, Natalie. I can see you are nothing like Abeloth was even if you are related."

Natalie walks to Hux and touches him to pull him out of the time manipulation. Hux tries to get his bearings and sees the others stuck in time except for Skywalker. "What is this? You brought me here for Snoke! How did the Resistance get here as well?"

"We brought them too, but we couldn't leave everyone to kill each other so here we are now. You're a master strategist, Hux. You have to appreciate it from that aspect."

"What do you want, Natalie?"

"I want you to work with the Resistance for peace in the galaxy."

"Work with? Why would we do that?"

"You want order in the galaxy? Stop all the useless killing! If you blow up 5 more planets, will it help you sleep any better at night?"

"We have the numbers, we have the resources, and we have the drive to win this! Why stop now?"

"Because if you keep going, there will be nothing to win!" Hux seemed to understand her point.

"How do I know I can trust them?"

"I will ensure that both parties are good actors for now, because I will come back to make sure of it if they aren't. I know I can trust in you and Luke on this. You both can convince your sides to be open and listen. It is within my power to just make you, but I'd rather not do that. "

"What about Snoke? There is no way he will agree to this!"

"I'll take care of Snoke, don't worry."

"Skywalker, you think this can work?," Hux said.

"I trust in Natalie and she thinks it can. I was foolish before, blinded by hate. I see the possibilities now of a partnership with the First Order to keep the galaxy safe."

"Ok, I am willing to try. I will discuss it with my people."

"I told you if you give up on world domination, it could make you happier.," Natalie projects to Hux's mind.

"Maybe you and Luke should start your discussion now. I have some things to address with Snoke." Natalie touches Snoke to remove him from the time manipulation and keys in on thoughts of his Mega Star Destroyer. While he is still coming to his senses, she Force folds them back to his ship. Snoke is disoriented due to the combination of being removed from the time manipulation and the Force folding back to his throne room. Snoke's Praetorian guards attempt to pounce on her, but she steals their consciousness from them and they fall to the ground. 

"I want to thank you, Snoke. For bringing me back. I would never have known these powers could have existed for me. If I thought I could trust you, I'd keep you alive as payback for that. Your sole motivation all along was to transfer your consciousness into Ben's body. Now, you know that I can't allow that and he doesn't want it. You'll just keep hopping from body to body. Now I know the irony of that coming from me being a relative of Abeloth. She has learned her lesson, but I don't see that you can or want to. Any final words?"

"You could rule the galaxy yourself, Natalie! Why not? You are the most powerful being right now! You could bring the galaxy order!"

"I don't want to do that! I just want to be with my family! Perhaps if you had found someone to care for, you would understand that."

Natalie put her hand to Snoke's head and flooded him with all the pain and suffering he had inflicted on others. This went on for minutes until his heart stopped and he was dead. 

"Are you ok, Ben?," she projected to his mind.

"A little shaken, but me and the kids are alright. You coming back soon?"

"Yes, just finishing up. I love you, baby."

"I love you too, Nat."

She closed their bond. She checked the ship for life signs. The guards were still alive and were loyal to Snoke, but Snoke is no more. They would probably appreciate being freed from Snoke's influence. She woke the guards and gave them a choice. They could either leave with her or stay and die on Snoke's ship. They chose to leave with her, so she Force folded them back to the planet after she set Snoke's ship to auto-destruct. She released the time manipulation from everyone and they could all see Snoke's ship explode from the planet. 

While she was gone, Luke and Hux had set up some tentative meetings for further discussions. Both sides had agreed to nonaggression pacts. Luke and Leia hugged and talked about his discussion with Hux. Leia was hesitant at first, but listened to Luke intently. Hux presented the same information to Phasma and she handled it well. Both groups were now aware of the truce that had started. There was a lot of work to do. Natalie scanned the feelings of the groups and was pleasantly surprised at what she found. Many of them were tired of fighting and were willing to work with the other side as long everyone could agree to some fairness. People did think about the Hosnian system, but felt it was best to honor those who lost their lives by striving for peace rather than revenge. Everyone's hands had blood on them and it would never wash off, but it was up to them to stop the flow of blood now.


	48. The One I Don't Deserve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie, Ben, and the babies make it home. Twitch stops by.

Ben landed the ship and Natalie boarded to help him with the babies. They left through the portal without a word to anyone. Natalie keyed the portal to hers and Ben's DNA only to avoid anyone passing through on either side. It was time for them to go home. They could worry about the galaxy later. Natalie Force folded them to her house. Both she and Ben breathed sighs of relief and they were exhausted by the recent events. The place looked flawless. Twitch had been looking after it for them. At some point, they should contact him to let him know they're back, but that could wait. 

"We need to get cleaned up. Do you mind if I go first, Ben?"

"Not at all, baby. It's good to be home.," Ben said as her kissed her lightly.

Natalie went to grab some light clothes and went in the bathroom. She brushed her teeth first then got in the shower. The warm water felt wonderful on her skin, much better than the sonics she got used to using in Ben's time. Just for a second she thought about washing her hair and then she realized she had none. It made her laugh for a minute. The hair would grow back mostly except for where she was scarred. 

Natalie got out of the shower, dried off, and put on her clothes. She left the bathroom and found Ben on the couch with the babies. Lexi and Xander had awoken but were quiet and listening to their father speak. "I love you both and your mother more than I ever thought I could love anything. I will never let any harm come to you. I will always be here for you no matter what happens.," Ben said with tears in his eyes and then turned to Natalie as she was walking into the room. 

She walked over to Ben to kiss his cheek and his lips. "We're both exhausted. Take a shower, you'll feel better. Then we'll rest for a while and then I'll order some takeout."

Ben got up from the couch and left her with the babies while he showered. The babies were still awake and staring at her now. "Lexi and Xander, I can't promise you that life will be easy, but it will be interesting. I never expected either of you to come into my life, but I'm so happy that you did. I thought your father was a dream that would never be real for me. When he became real for me, we fell in love and then you both came unexpectedly. The Force brought you to us and I am so grateful that it did." She brought each of their foreheads to her lips and stroked both of their faces. She checked both of their diapers for soiling and started to feed Xander because he had finished his last meal earlier than Lexi. Ben came back while she was feeding Xander and he began to feed Lexi. "You know we're gonna need more diapers and bottles soon.," Ben said.

"I know. We're good for another day or so. You could ask Twitch to bring us some supplies. It would be a good way to let him know we're here. He'd be surprised to see me.," Natalie said as she burped Xander and checked his diaper once more. He fell asleep in minutes. 

Ben burped Lexi and she soon went to sleep as well. They both got up and took the babies to bed with them. Ben wrapped his arms around Natalie's middle as it seemed to be his new favorite position. "I don't think I've had the chance to tell you how much I missed you while you were gone and how happy I am that you're back, baby."

"You know I feel the same, Ben.," Natalie said as she ran her hands through his hair as it was also her new favorite position. 

"If we ever get any alone time again, I'll show you how much I missed you.," Ben said as he playfully kissed Nat's stomach.

"If you mean what I think you mean, it can't happen for at least another 5 weeks."

"I'm learning to be a patient man. Let's get some sleep." They soon went to sleep alongside the babies. 

_______________________________________________________________

 

Natalie stirred awake first while Ben and the babies were still sleeping. It would be impossible for her to get up without disturbing Ben so she stroked his face and hair to alert him to her being up. Ben woke up and pulled Natalie down to face him. He stroked Natalie's bald, scarred head and kissed her head, face, and neck. Natalie reveled in his attention and returned it. "Are you hungry, Ben?"

"Yes, starving. We might be lucky enough to eat before the babies wake up if you call in the order now." Natalie got out of bed and walked to the kitchen for the menus that she used to use. She called the place she and Ben liked the most for the food. When she called, they mentioned how much they missed her and were glad to hear from her again. While they were waiting, she got some plates and forks out. 

Ben made his way out of the bedroom and met Natalie on the couch. He brought her over to him so she would rest in his lap as he held her. "It's so good to be home again with you and the kids."

"It is. It seems like a dream I don't want to wake up from. Have you thought about what you want to do from here?"

"Anything that involves being with you and the babies is fine for me. Did you want to go back to work, Nat?"

"I don't know. I do miss it, but I don't know if I want to miss out on being with the kids. It'd be a good time to go see my family now. What do you think? Could you handle that?"

"We barely survived my crazy family. Somehow I think yours will be a lot easier."

"I'm pretty sure you realize we can't tell anyone about our "ordeal." We're gonna have to lie to everyone, even Twitch."

"I know. I think we can make it work or we could just do mind tricks on everyone.," Ben said as he smirked.

"No mind tricks unless absolutely necessary and please don't tell my family that we slept together after only knowing each other for 24hrs!"

"We could say that we knew and liked each other for years before we got together which is technically true. You were worried about the age difference, but I finally won you over. We fell in love and got married. We really wanted children so you had a procedure and took medication to have the babies. You got sick and we did another experimental treatment to save your life."

"Should I be worried about how good a liar you are?," Natalie smirked.

"You know I can't lie to you. You'd know. To you, I'm an open book, Mrs. Solo." Ben smiled.

"Aah, Mrs. Solo. I love that." Natalie repositioned herself on Ben's lap to straddle him. They looked into each other's eyes deeply. Natalie ran her hands down Ben's chest and Ben ran his hands down her back to her buttocks. "I'd be open to a little preview of how much you missed me, Mr. Solo.," Natalie said as she moved her right hand down to Ben's cock to stroke him slowly. Ben startled a little not because he was surprised, but because he had missed her touch so much. His lips chased hers and caught them in a longingly passionate kiss. Just then, the intercom went off and the babies stirred and started to whine softly. Ben and Natalie pulled back from their kiss. Natalie went for the food and Ben went to the babies. 

Natalie came back up with the food and plated it for herself and Ben. She left the food on the kitchen counter and went to help Ben with the babies. He was in the middle of feeding Xander so she picked up Lexi to feed her. Xander tended to go slow with his feedings and Lexi tended to go fast with hers. Natalie finished feeding Lexi before Ben finished with Xander. Lexi was burped and changed before Xander finished eating. Lexi went right back to sleep. "Ben, go eat and I'll finish up with Xander." Ben went to the kitchen and grabbed his food. Natalie burped and changed Xander, but he took a while to go back to sleep. He liked to be talked to before he would go to sleep. When Xander finally closed his eyes to sleep, Natalie made her way back to the kitchen to grab her food and she sat down next to Ben who was working on his second helping. 

"It's amazing how they differ in their personalities already when they're barely a week old.," Natalie said before she scooped a forkful of food in her mouth.

"Aside from you, they are the most beautiful things I've ever seen. I can't believe I helped create them."

"You still don't believe that you deserve happiness, do you?"

"You and those children saved me, Nat. I should be dead. If I hadn't found you, I would have died fighting that stupid war, died for power that I probably never would have had, died when Snoke took over my body. I have done nothing to deserve this life. I need to prove that I deserve it!"

Natalie put down her food to go to Ben. "Who are you gonna prove it to? You once told me that the Force brought us together. The Force gave you this life. You're worried you won't be a good father to them."

"I have to be a good father to them. I can't fail at this!"

"I won't let you fail. I love you and them too much! What happened to Han will not happen to you! You aren't the same person as you were then!"

"I know, but I'm scared that I won't be able to stop myself from screwing them up!"

"Do you trust me, Ben?"

"I trust no one else more."

"Then trust me to let you know when you screw up. Trust me to have your back. I'll always have your back!"

"I don't deserve---"

"Ben, stop saying that! If you didn't deserve us, you wouldn't have us! Please give up this poor self esteem. You've made mistakes like everyone has! Move past them so we can enjoy our lives now! We've fought so hard to get here. We all deserve to be here and love each other. This is what can ruin us!."

Ben looked at Natalie with tears in his eyes and a smile on his face. "I need you in my life. I need the kids in my life. I will do whatever I need to do to keep you all with me."

"I just need you to love us and believe in us." She took his plate and placed it on the living room table. She straddled Ben, kissed his tears away, and stroked his face. "I love you, just show me that you love me back." Ben brought his hands to her face and placed butterfly kisses to her face and neck. 

"Please touch me, baby. Please.," Ben pleaded.

Natalie reached her right hand down to stroke Ben's cock slowly. Ben thrusted into her hand and met her rhythm. "I missed you so much, Nat.," Ben murmured into Natalie's neck. 

"I know. I missed you too.," Natalie said as she chased Ben's lips and continued to stroke Ben's cock till precome leaked over her hand. "Tell me what you need, Ben. What do you need?"

"I need your mouth on me, Nat. Please.," Ben says as he shakes with need.

Natalie gets up from the couch and gets on her knees in front of Ben as he moves his pants lower. Natalie takes Ben in to her mouth and they both shiver. She licks up all the precome and Ben's hand strokes her head. Natalie runs her tongue from the base of Ben's dick to the tip and she massages his balls. She bobs her head as she takes the tip into her mouth and she encourages Ben to push her head down so she can take him deeper into her throat. "Baby, I'm so close.," Ben said. When Natalie's lips met the base of Ben's dick and he felt his tip reach the back of her throat, he came with full force and they both moaned in ecstasy. Natalie cleaned Ben up with her mouth and she went to straddle him again. She kissed Ben deeply and he held her face in both hands. "I love you.," Natalie projected into Ben's mind. "I love you too.," Ben projected back. 

"Why don't you go get cleaned up, baby?," Natalie said. "I'm gonna finish eating and then I'll get cleaned up too."

"Ok, baby. I'll be right back.," Ben said as he picked Natalie up, set her down, and he went off to the bathroom.

Natalie finished up her food and smiled to herself. She knew they were going to be ok. Ben came back from the bathroom and gathered Nat in his arms so he could kiss her deeply. "I love tasting me on you.," Ben said.

Nat smiled again. "You taste really good, baby. I'm gonna get cleaned up and then you're gonna call Twitch.," Natalie said as she kissed him before leaving for the bathroom. 

Nat cleaned her teeth and washed her hands then joined Ben on the couch. "You ready to call Twitch? Don't tell him I'm here. I want to surprise him."

Ben called Twitch, "Ben, I'm so glad to hear from you. How are you and the kids? Did you need anything?," Twitch said.

"Me and the kids are ok. I did need your help with some more diapers and bottles for the kids. Can you come by today? I missed you, man."

"I missed you too, Ben. I miss Nat so much. Was she in pain when--."

"We can talk about Nat when you get here, Twitch. Just let me know when you're on your way, ok?"

"Sure, Ben. I'll give you a call. Bye."

"He'll be here shortly.," Ben said. 

"I really missed him, Ben. He is like a brother to me. I never would have made it this far without him."

Ben extended his arms and brought Nat close to him. "I know. He's important to me too. I'm glad that I can call him a friend."

They both went into the bedroom to check on the babies who were still sound asleep, but they would probably wake up shortly due to hunger or wetness. They came back out to the living room and held each other on the couch. Twitch showed up a few hours later. Ben had anticipated that so when the babies stirred awake he went to the bedroom to handle it so Nat and Twitch could catch up. 

Twitch made his way up to the top floor in the elevator. When the elevator doors opened, Nat was there to meet him. "Hey, stranger.," Natalie said.

Tears welled up in Twitch's eyes as he looked at her bald scarred head and reached out to hug her. "How is this possible? I thought you were dead, honey!"

"Reports of my death were premature, Twitch!," Natalie said as she hugged him tightly.

"So you found some quack to take the tumor out and it worked?"

"Basically. I'm fine. I'm cured so you'll have to deal with me a little longer now."

"I will deal with you forever, baby. I can't wait to meet those little devils that you and Ben spawned."

"Twitch, come on back so you can meet the kids.," Ben said when he came out from the bedroom. 

Twitch made his way to the bedroom and the babies were awake and quiet. "Can I hold them?"

"Of course, you can, Uncle Twitch!," Natalie said as Ben held her from behind. 

"What are their names, Nat?," Twitch said as he picked up Lexi.

"You have Lexi in your arms and Xander is still on the bed."

"Hey darling, you are so beautiful. Your daddy is gonna have the beat the boys off you with a stick.," Twitch said as he looked at Lexi in his arms and she cooed at him. He gave her back to Ben and then picked up Xander. 

"You two made some gorgeous babies. This one's gonna be handful too."

"We are gonna need all the help we can get, Twitch.," Natalie said. "Why don't you guys talk for a bit and I'll make sure they're dry before I try and put them to sleep."

Ben and Twitch made their way out to the living room. Ben hugged Twitch when they got to the couch. "Twitch, you have helped us so much. I really appreciate it and if you ever need anything, just say the word. I hate to do this now, but I need your help with something else."

"Anything, Ben. What is it?"

"I want to do something special for Nat in 5 weeks. Can you help me to come up with some ideas?"


	49. The One Who Deserves My All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie and Ben visit her family. Ben arranges a day of luxury for Natalie. Natalie meets a familiar face. Ben and Natalie make up for lost time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't resist!! And no, you didn't just misread the intro and mistakenly fall into a Matt the Radar Technician fic.

The next 5 weeks went by pretty fast. They did take the babies to visit with Nat's family for about a week and a half. Everyone was surprised that she had gotten married again and had twins, but they were really happy to see her. It took them a while to get used to the bald head, but they got over it. Ben was really anxious to meet Nat's daughter and granddaughter. Nat had been really close to them before she moved away and he knew she was anxious about seeing them too. The first meeting was tense. 

"So you leave for 5 years without much contact and now you're back with a new husband and 2 babies, Mom?," Natalie's daughter Brittany said.

"I know it's crazy, but I'm happy. I've been through a lot and--"

"I know you've been through a lot, Mom. I wanted to be there for you, but you shut me out. Naomi and I needed you and you practically disappeared!"

"I'm sorry that I left the way that I did, but I want to do better. I want us to be a family again. I just needed some time to get my head straight. Ben helped me with that."

"How did you meet him, Mom? He would look like a teenager without that scar. How old is he?"

"There is a 12 year age difference if you must know. It's not an issue for us. We're both adults. I've known him through work for a while. We always liked each other, but I didn't want to date him because of the age thing. He won me over eventually."

"You think he won't trade you in for a younger model eventually like dad did?," Brittany said as her mom grimaced at her words.

Ben had been listening while they talked about him like he wasn't there. He was sympathetic to Brittany's anger, but he felt he had to speak up after that low blow.

"Brittany, I know that you're mad at your mom, but that was uncalled for. I have been there with your mom through a lot and I'm still here. I'm sorry your dad wasn't. Your mom loves you and your daughter a lot. I might not be someone you would've chosen for her, but she chose me. So please try to respect that choice. I want to be a part of your family. Just give me a chance."

Brittany looked at Ben and then back at Natalie. "I'm sorry, Mom. You didn't deserve that. I love you. I just felt like you abandoned me and Naomi. It wasn't like you just moved to another state. You moved all the way to the opposite side of the country!"

"I was trying to run away from my problems and that never works for anyone. I did learn the tools I needed to get my shit together and now I am so happy. I just want to share it with you."

"I missed you so much, Mom!," Brittany said as she hugged Nat. "Ben, I respect what you said. A lot of people would have stayed quiet. That tells me that you really love her. Let me tell you something. If you ever hurt my mom, you'll have me to deal with!!"

"You'd probably have to get in line behind your mom first.," Ben said as he extended his hand to Brittany as a sign of respect. She shook it and smiled. 

With that, they all went to the bedrooms upstairs to check on Naomi, Lexi, and Xander. They were all still sleeping. Naomi looked just like her grandmother. Brittany commented that she could see both Natalie and Ben in Lexi and Xander. They all left the bedrooms after they were done ogling the children. 

"So are you done having kids, Grandma?," Brittany said.

"Pretty sure that I am, but seriously thinking of having a hysterectomy. 3 kids is probably enough at my age."

"Hey, don't I get a say in this?," Ben said sarcastically.

"Sure, we can have more babies if you would like to carry them, Ben!"

"I'd be down for that.," Ben said as he kissed Nat playfully.

"Ok, lovebirds. I don't think my virgin ears can handle this conversation anymore."

The babies started to stir so Ben went to check on them while Brittany and Natalie continued to talk. 

"I like Ben. He obviously loves you a lot, but Mom, the hair really? You always hated guys with long hair."

"I know, but it suits him. It grew on me and besides he cares for it like it's one of the children. No man buns or top knots allowed!" They both laughed.

"So I guess I need to visit you out there soon."

"We would love that and I think you would too. You'll get to meet Twitch finally. You'll love each other, I know it." They hugged again. 

The rest of the trip went pretty well. They embraced Ben as part of the family because Nat obviously loved him. They could see that he adored her and the babies. Everyone exchanged numbers and addresses with future plans made. Ben, Natalie, and the babies made their way back home.

When they settled in back home, Nat got back into working out with zeal. She felt like a sloth cause she had been on bed rest months before she gave birth and there had been no time to get back into her regular routine since being resurrected. She needed it to keep her mind and body together. She started trying to cook again. Poor Ben was the designated taste tester. He was honest about her attempts and they were pretty bad. He comforted her after. "I am a master of space and time! Why the fuck can't I do this?," Natalie said half sarcastically.

Ben laughed. "Nat, you can't be good at everything. This is just not your thing. We won't starve. Maybe I could try cooking."

"I'll try my hand at baking then." She actually was quite good at it. She started baking all their desserts: cakes, cookies, pies, etc. She and Ben had to add to their workouts to account for the extra calories. 

They had developed routines with the babies. They were quite the domestics now. When 5 weeks was up, Nat thought they would just wait for the babies to go to sleep at night and that she and Ben would get their long awaited alone time. That morning after she had showered and dressed preparing for feeding the babies, the intercom went off. Ben answered it as if he was expecting someone. "I'm here for Mrs. Solo, sir.," the driver said. 

"Mrs. Solo will be down shortly, thank you.," Ben said.

"What is happening, Ben?," Natalie said. 

"I made some plans for you. Some things I know you will enjoy. I will be meeting you later."

"You're not gonna tell me what they are and you're not coming with me?"

"Nope and I'll be taking your phone.," Ben held his hand out to receive the phone from Nat.

"You know I hate surprises, right?," Nat said as she gave him the phone.

"Yes, but you'll like this one. Have a good day, Mrs. Solo.," Ben said as he kissed Natalie goodbye.

She inhaled sharply and got in the elevator to go down and meet the driver. "Good morning, Mrs. Solo. I am Joffrey and I'll be your driver today. Please.," Joffrey said as he gestured for her to get in to the limousine. 

"Thank you, Joffrey," Natalie said somewhat nervously as she sat in the car and he closed the door. He went back around to the driver's side and he prepared to drive off.

"Can you tell me where you're taking me, Joffrey?"

"Madame, I've been told not to tell you anything about our destination. If you would like, I can serve you something before we leave."

"That won't be necessary, thank you." She resolved to just try to enjoy whatever Ben had planned. She could probably just call Twitch later cause she could tell he had helped Ben with whatever this is. Joffrey drove about an hour away from their house and stopped in front of a really expensive looking and exclusive spa. He got out of the car and opened her door for her then he made his way to the spa door to hold it open for her. 

"It was a pleasure, Mrs. Solo. Have a good day. I will be back to pick you up later.," Joffrey smiled and walked back to his car. 

"Thank you, Joffrey.," Natalie said as she went forward into the spa.

There was a beautifully dressed young woman there to greet her. "Mrs. Solo, it is a pleasure. I'm Portia and have everything ready to you. Come this way please."

"Is there a phone I could use please?"

"There is a phone, Mrs. Solo. However, we've been instructed that it should only be used in an emergency. This day is for your enjoyment. I assure you there is nothing to worry about. Come this way for your first treatment.," Portia said.

Natalie followed quietly. This was not the type of spa she had gone to before. This place was clearly gonna cost thousands and the day wasn't over yet. Ben couldn't afford this and it was expensive even for a favor that one of Twitch's clients that owed him. "Sweetie, did you spend our kids' college money on this?," Natalie projected to Ben.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Mrs. Solo. Enjoy the rest of your day!," Ben projected back.

Twitch and Ben went through a lot of trouble to set this up for her so she might as well enjoy it. First, she had a facial and they even did some high tech thing to soften her facial scar. Then she had a body wrap which was just divine. They served her a lunch she was tempted to ask for the recipe of. Waxing was next and it was awful but necessary. The tech tried to make it as painless as possible and Ben would probably appreciate it. Lastly, they did a manicure and pedicure. Strangely, there was no massage, but perhaps Ben planned it for later since he knew she loved his massages. They dressed her in a casual outfit and gave her a bag for her clothing. All of the techs and staff were lined up as they said goodbye to her. It appeared that she was their only client for the day. Joffrey was at the spa door to lead her back to the limousine. "I trust you enjoyed yourself, Madame."

"I did Joffrey, thank you. Would it be presumptuous of me to assume that you will tell me about our next destination?"

"I'm not permitted to tell you that information, Madame. But I'm sure you will enjoy what has been planned. Would you like anything served to you before we get on our way, Mrs. Solo?"

"No thank you, Joffrey."

Joffrey drove them to a swanky hotel that was close to being outside of the city limits. He stopped the car and came around to her side to open the door for her. Natalie got out and Joffrey led her to the door of the hotel which he opened for her. He presented her to the front desk staff as Mrs. Solo and he bid her goodbye until the next morning when he would be back to pick her up. A manager lead her up to the penthouse level of the hotel. When the door was opened, she thought she was dreaming. This room was fit for a king or queen. "I've been told to let you know that a massage tech is on their way up. Let me take you to where they'll be working with you." He lead her to a room set up to do the massage. There were oils, towels, and robes available. She was a little disappointed that Ben wouldn't be doing her massage cause he was so good at it but she was sure that whoever he'd arranged for was excellent if they were doing it out of the hotel. "They've said to undress to your level of comfort, Mrs. Solo. Is there anything else I can get for you?"

"No, thank you."

Natalie got totally undressed and chose a large towel to wrap around herself. She waited a few minutes before a young man with short blonde hair and glasses that looked suspiciously like her husband walked in--same facial scar, same nose, same mole dotted and freckled face, same pouting lips, and same gorgeous body. 

She smiled as he came toward her. "You're a handsome devil, what's your name?," she said.

"I'm Matt the massage technician. You must be Mrs. Solo. No one told me you were so beautiful."

"Are you flirting with me, Matt?"

"I would never flirt with a married woman, Mrs. Solo. I am married myself. Plus I heard your husband is a jerk face and would kick my ass if I did anything untoward."

Natalie laughed. "Trust me, Matt. He is not a jerk face. As a matter of fact, he arranged this entire day of luxury for me. When I see him, I plan on showing him my appreciation because he is such a good husband. You remind me of him a bit. You sure you don't know him. His name is Ben Solo."

"I'm sure I'd remember someone by that name. Mrs. Solo, do you mind if we get started? I have other clients I have to see today and I believe you have a date with your husband for dinner."

"I don't want to mess with your schedule, Matt. Please tell me what position you'd like me in for the massage."

"Lie on your stomach please, Mrs. Solo. "

Natalie lay on her stomach and attempted to move the towel down. "Oh no, Mrs. Solo. Let me take care of that. Please relax."

"Whatever you say, Matt. Do you mind if we talk while you work?"

"Not at all.," "Matt" said as he used his large hands to move Natalie's towel down to her lower back and grabbed some massage oil.

"How long have you been doing this kind of work, Matt?" "Matt" rubbed some massage oil on her neck, arms, shoulders and back.

"Not very long, as a matter of fact, you are my first client, Mrs. Solo."

"Really that is surprising. How did my husband find you?"

"I believe Mr. Meyers recommended me to him." "Matt" took his time to massage the knots out of Natalie's muscles.

"Really? He must have regarded you very highly to recommend you without any experience."

"I have experience, Mrs. Solo. Just not with such an exclusive client like yourself."

"What's so special about me, Matt?"

"Well I've been told that you are an amazing woman, wife, and mother. When I heard that, I jumped at the chance to do this for you. You deserve to be pampered. Has anyone ever told you that you have a great body, Mrs. Solo?"

"My husband tells me from time to time. The scars don't turn you off, Matt?"

"Not at all. I'm sure you noticed my facial scar. Actually I dig chicks with scars. I think they're hot. Do you mind if I move the towel down, Mrs. Solo?"

"Of course, Matt. I am in your large capable hands."

"Thank you for trusting me, Mrs. Solo. I hope my future clients are just like you." "Matt" moved the towel down so he saw Natalie's ass and legs.

"Matt, I really like you and I know that I'm asking a lot, but I want to be your only client. I'm willing to make it worth your while." "Matt" applied some massage oil to Natalie's ass and legs and his dick was getting really hard.

"I would love that, Mrs. Solo. It would hurt my bank account a little, but I'm sure we could make other arrangements for payment."

"You sure you're wife wouldn't mind, Matt? Is she a jealous woman?"

"No, my wife is an angel. I'd never leave her. She understands me like no one else. But you see, we haven't had sex in a while. She was really sick and she was pregnant. I've been really patient, but she's worth it. I just want to worship her like the queen that she is. I'm sure your husband feels the same way about you, Mrs. Solo."

"I think you're right, Matt. You and your wife's story sounds very similar to mine and my husband's. Are you sure you don't know him?"

"No, I'm sure I don't but now that you've told me about him, he doesn't sound like a bad guy at all. Could I get you to lie on your back so I can finish your massage? I'd hate to make you late for dinner with him."

"Of course, Matt. Has anyone ever told you that you have a sexy voice?"

"My wife has told me that from time to time. Do you know her, Mrs. Solo?"

"I don't think so, but we'd probably be great friends since we have so much in common. I think guys with scars are hot too. Matt, I can't help but notice that while you've been doing my massage that you've gotten hard. Does that normally happen to you when you give massages?"

"Only when I'm with my wife, Mrs. Solo. I hope you aren't offended. As I said, I find you very attractive." "Matt" applied massage oil to Natalie's neck, shoulders, chest, abdomen, and legs.

"Oh no, my husband gets hard when he gives me massages as well. I also find you very attractive, Matt. Does that bother you?"

"Not at all, Mrs. Solo. You know I wonder if we can help each other out. I can't go out in public with this erection. It might scare people. I'd hate for you to leave the room unsatisfied. Just for the sake of releasing tension and the fact that I am doing a massage for you, how about we compromise and give each other some pleasure?"

"Are you sure our spouses won't mind, Matt? I really love my husband and it sounds like you really love your wife. I don't want to break up any one's home. I'm not that kind of person."

"Me neither, Mrs. Solo. I think they would both understand. Have you enjoyed your massage today?"

"Yes, Matt. I did enjoy it so much. It rivals my husband's massages. As far as giving each other pleasure, what did you have in mind?"

"Well, I could lie on the table, then have you sit on my face while I give you head and you could also give me head. I believe it's called 69."

"Matt, that sounds wonderful. You seem so nice and caring. Are you sure your wife won't be upset?"

"She wants me to be happy just like your husband wants you to be happy. You look so beautiful, Mrs. Solo. Can I kiss you?"

"Yes, Matt. I've been waiting for you to ask. Usually when I kiss my husband, I love to touch his hair. I won't do that with you because I would hate to mess your hair up. I don't think your wife would appreciate that."

"You're right, she wouldn't. You're so special. I hope your husband appreciates you, Mrs. Solo. You're really tempting." "Matt" removed his glasses and kissed Natalie softly at first and probed progressively deeper. They both moaned into each other's mouth's. Natalie reached down to stroke "Matt's" dick. "Matt" thrusted into Natalie's hand. 

"Mrs. Solo, let's move this to the massage table. I wanna sit you on my face so I can fuck you with my tongue."

"Are you sure we'll both fit, Matt? You're quite big."

"What kind of massage technician do you take me for, Mrs. Solo? I checked before I brought you here."

"Ok, Matt. I trust you."

"Matt" placed some clean towels on the massage table and laid himself on it. He lifted Natalie on top of him so she was sitting on his face and she was facing his painfully hard dick. "Matt" thrusted his long tongue into Natalie's vagina. Between thrusts, "Matt" said, "You taste so good, Mrs. Solo."

"You feel so good, Matt. Please keep going. Would you like me to get started on your dick?"

"No, I'll come right away. When you're about to come then you can suck me off, Mrs. Solo. Don't be afraid to move around. I'd love for you to dirty me up a bit."

"Matt, if you play with my clit, I think that would get us closer to what we both want."

"Yes, Mrs. Solo. By the way, I love the wax job that you got done. It was very timely." "Matt" moved his tongue to Natalie's clit. He nipped at it a bit with his teeth, sucked on it, and alternated between the flat and tip of tongue. He wanted to make her come so hard. He could tell she was getting close because he was too. Natalie maneuvered to "Matt's" dick and started to lick up the precome. They both moaned loudly. Natalie took him a little deeper into her mouth. "Matt" was desperate to come in her mouth and their height difference was a bit of a problem so he let Natalie move his dick further into her mouth and he used his hands to continue to stimulate her clit. Natalie placed her hand about the base of "Matt's" dick to jerk him a bit while she continued to suck him off. They were both right on the edge of some long awaited orgasms. "Aww fuck!!," "Matt" said as they both came so hard that he screamed and Natalie moaned as she swallowed "Matt's" come. When Natalie released his dick, "Matt" pulled her back toward him so he could try to make her come again. He stimulated her with his fingers and tongue only to avoid oversensitivity. It wasn't long before they both came again and this time Natalie screamed as "Matt" moaned.

Both "Matt" and Natalie were filthy with oil, sweat, and come. Somehow, "Matt's" hair stayed in place. 

"Mrs. Solo, that was wonderful. Your husband is a very lucky man. I hope your dinner is wonderful. Maybe we could do this again sometime."

"I'd love to do this again, Matt. I think my husband is waiting to have dinner with me and I'm sure your wife is waiting for you. We both need to get cleaned up."

"I agree, Mrs. Solo. There is a bathroom that has been setup for you to use. There are clothes for you to wear to dinner awaiting you. Your husband will meet you in the dining room the floor below you for dinner. I was told your husband wanted me to deliver the message to you."

"I don't know how to thank you, Matt. It was a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, Mrs. Solo." "Matt" lifted Natalie off of him and kissed her one last time before he left the room.

Natalie put her towel back on and gathered herself before she made her way to her designated shower. She examined the clothes left for her to wear and the dress was similar to her wedding dress but it was black. She turned on the shower and indulged in the warm water. Today had been such a wonderful day already and was very likely to get better. She almost felt sorry to wipe off all the grime of her encounter with "Matt." She was seeing her husband later so she couldn't reek of sex with another man. She laughed to herself at that. When she finished in the shower, she grabbed a towel to dry herself off and she noticed that the bathroom had her favorite scent in it as well as the minimal makeup she wore on her wedding day. She brushed her teeth, finished getting ready and made her way to the dining room on the floor below her. 

The maître'd met her at the door. "Mrs. Solo, it's wonderful to have you. Let me show you to your table. Your husband has notified us that he is on his way as well. Would you like a drink or an appetizer while you are waiting?"

"No, thank you. I'll wait for my husband."

Natalie didn't have to wait long. Ben entered the restaurant shortly after she did. He was wearing, if she had to guess, a tailored Tom Ford suit. He looked like he had stepped off the runway. His hair had been trimmed and just brushed his shoulders. She stood up as he walked toward their table. They were the only customers in the restaurant. "Hey baby! How was your day? Did you enjoy yourself, Nat?," Ben said before he kissed her hello. 

"Of course, I enjoyed myself, Ben. You outdid yourself. I can't thank you enough. I really appreciated you sending "Matt" to me for the massage. I'm so relaxed now and I am ready to have a great dinner with my husband."

"He came highly recommended and I heard you were so pleased with his services that you'd love to see him again in the future."

"I was that pleased and it's funny. He looks a lot like you except for the blond hair and glasses. You sure you don't know him?"

"There was a Matt who was a radar technician when I was on the Finalizer, but it can't be the same guy. People said he looked like me too, but I never met him. I'm glad there's someone else out there who can give you a good massage. Sometimes I get tired so it's good to have an extra pair of hands.," Ben said with a smile.

The maître'd came back to ask if they needed drinks or appetizers. Ben pulled out Natalie's chair for her to sit before he took his seat. They were both starving and thirsty so they did get those drinks and food before the main course was to come. "Ben, how did you do all this? This has got to be costing someone a fortune. Were there any mind tricks involved?" 

"No mind tricks. This is all due to Twitch's client generosity believe it or not. They all owed him favors and were happy to pay him back like this. "

"So Twitch has my children, right?"

"Of course, I wouldn’t trust anyone else with them. He was happy to do it."

"Baby, this was way too much. You did this for an arbitrary date for us to have sex after I had our children. What are you gonna do for a birthday or anniversary? And how will I ever compete?"

"There's no competition, Nat. I simply picked things I knew you would like. I just want to make you happy. That's all. We don’t even have to have sex. "

"What about "Matt"?"

"What about him? I told you I don't know him. If you enjoyed yourself with him, I'm glad he gave you something that you needed. He provided the service he was hired for. Should I be jealous of a massage technician? I think not as long as you come home to me and the kids.," Ben said with a knowing smile.

Natalie returned his knowing smile. "I want to be with my husband tonight. We both have been waiting a long time for this."

"I have been waiting, but I can wait longer. I told you I've learned to be a patient man since I've been with you."

The waiter brought their main course. They were both starving and attacked their plates. They started to share their food with each other. Between bites, they touched each other's skin in some way to continue contact. When they finally finished their entrees, their desserts were brought in short order. They repeated their earlier entrée routines. When their desserts were done, the waiter came back to ask if either of them wanted a night cap or coffee. They both refused and thanked the waiter. They both got out of their seats and left the restaurant arm in arm to enter the elevator. In the elevator, they couldn't keep their eyes off each other. When the elevator stopped at the penthouse they got off and walked toward the door. 

Once the door was opened, they both walked in and they closed the door behind them. Natalie kept her back against the front door of the penthouse and Ben was standing oh so close in front of her. Natalie brought her hand to his facial scar and stroked it as she had many times before. Ben brought his hand to Natalie's facial scar and stroked it as he had many times before. Their lips met tentatively. Natalie ran her free hand down Ben's chest and finally brushed her fingers over his left nipple that was still covered by his shirt. Ben ran his free hand over the small of Natalie's back and then down the crease of her ass. Their kiss had intensified and they had both moved on to the other's favorite spots to be kissed and licked. Ben lifted Natalie enough for her to wrap her legs around his waist. He snapped his hips into her so that she could feel his hardness against her warmth. 

They both seemed to know they needed to move this into the bedroom. Ben carefully walked them toward the bedroom while they both continued to kiss, nip, and lick each other. Ben walked until he could feel the edge of the bed against his legs. He gently lowered Nat onto the bed and slowly, achingly began to grind into her with his still clothed cock. They both thought they could come just from that. It felt so good, but not good enough. Ben used his thumb to tease at Nat's clit through her underwear. He loved the sounds she was making in reaction to his ministrations and he felt it making him impossibly harder. Nat slid her hand down into his shamelessly expensive underwear to stroke at his dick. Ben made a noise that signaled relief as she touched him. He thrusted into her hand slowly as if he relished the time she was touching him. Natalie suddenly needed her skin to be touching Ben's skin without barriers so she slowly began to unbutton his shirt and pants. Ben followed by trying to remove her dress and underwear. It wasn't long before they were both naked and against each other. 

Ben lowered his nose to touch Natalie's nose and they stared into each other's eyes. They stroked each other's facial scars. Ben lined himself up to enter Natalie. Their lips met and they both tentatively darted their tongues into each other's mouths. When Ben finally entered Nat, they both whimpered into each other's mouths. They stalled and rested their foreheads together. It felt so good to have their bodies touch this way again. It was minutes before they both started to move. 

They each moved slowly to meet each other. Ben's hands had moved to Natalie's buttocks and Natalie's hands to his buttocks. Natalie had wrapped her legs around Ben's hips to ease the entry, but Ben maneuvered to bend Natalie in half to deepen his thrusts. Natalie tightened around Ben's cock with each thrust. Ben's thrusts had been becoming quicker until he focused on getting deeper inside Natalie. His last few thrusts slowed while he tried to savor her warmth and his release came with full force. "I love you so fucking much, baby," Ben moaned gutturally as Natalie closed her eyes and let out a loud cry. Ben stayed hard inside Natalie and she wrapped her legs around his waist. They were both drained physically and mentally, but they still had a few more rounds left in them for later. 

They were both breathing heavily and looking at each other. Natalie spoke first and said, "I asked Abeloth why this thing between us was so strong and she said that it was the Force that makes it so strong. She also said that she brought us together, but that she only made the introduction. Is she right? There has to be more to it."

Ben answered, "I used to think that the Force was the answer to everything. After meeting and falling in love with you and having the kids, I realized that the Force can only do so much. We are what makes this thing so strong. Our love and our desire. The Force can only enhance what is already there." 

They kissed lazily and passionately for a few minutes before they moved on to the next round. 

________________________________________________________________________

Ben and Natalie hated to go back to reality so soon, but their kids needed them and they could both admit to missing them terribly even though they knew they were in good hands. They both showered and dressed before they left the room to get on the elevator. They met Joffrey out in front of the hotel so he could drive them home. Their night had been long so they fell asleep in the car on the way back. Twitch would bring the babies home to them in a few hours and they would go back to being parents soon enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may say this was really indulgent on my part. You may say that it was a little over the top. You may say that my raging Throner is showing again. You may say it went on a little too long. You may say that I'm crazy. You would be right on all accounts!! If you're still here, this is what you should be expecting.


	50. The One I Can't Get Enough Of

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We flash forward 2 years into the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tons of sex and tiny bit of angst!!

2 years later

 

"Matt" was naked and tied to a sturdy chair in the swanky hotel he had met Mrs. Solo in 2 years ago. He wasn't sure what to expect, but was nervously and eagerly anticipating her reappearance. He showed up to give her a massage and maybe something extra if she allowed it. He entered the room to meet with her and was greeted with a darkened room and a command to blindfold himself and sit in the chair he was tied to now. Mrs. Solo then tied him to the chair and told him to prepare for some fun then she left the room. About 5 minutes later, Mrs. Solo returned and removed his blindfold. She was wearing black lace lingerie that complimented her body and knee high boots with high heels. She was stunning with black loose curls that fell just past her jaw and red matte lips. "Matt's" dick got hard immediately. 

"Mrs. Solo, you look beautiful. I'm confused. Your husband arranged for me to give you a massage."

"What my husband doesn't know won't hurt him, right?"

Mrs. Solo straddled "Matt's" hard dick while still clothed and "Matt" startled a bit as precome leaked all over his stomach. Mrs. Solo proceeded to suck bruises and bites in to "Matt's" chest and abdomen as he gasped and moaned. "Mrs. Solo, this feels wonderful. I am supposed to be pampering you."

"Don't you deserve to be pampered, Matt? Don't you deserve to get what you want and need sometimes? Is your wife neglecting you, Matt?"

"Not at all, Mrs. Solo. We're busy raising children like you and your husband are. I just love pampering her because she enjoys it. I have to worship her because she deserves it."

"And you don't, Matt? Your wife loves you so much. She wants you to know it just like you want her to know it. Tell me what you need, Matt, so I can give it to you."

"Mrs. Solo, this day is for--"

Mrs. Solo gets up off of "Matt," places her right boot against "Matt's" balls and presses into them. "Matt" is surprised but his pupils blow wide with lust and he gets a bit harder. "You don't have to be ashamed, Matt! Just tell me!"

"Please, Mrs. Solo. I have a job to do.," "Matt" said breathing heavily.

"Your job is to please me, Matt. It's ok to say that you want to be dominated. I want to dominate you. That would please me!," Mrs. Solo said as she grabbed "Matt's" neck with both hands and "choked" him.

"Matt" was getting lightheaded and he again got impossibly harder. His precome started to pool in the chair he was sitting naked in. Mrs. Solo removed her hands from his neck and he got some of his breath back, but he was still "choking." Mrs. Solo removed her clothing except for the boots and she lowered herself onto "Matt's" dick. She felt so good. Her hips moved to bring his dick deeper into her. He was helpless underneath her. The "choking" worsened a bit. The rhythm of her fucking increased as she clenched around him. He thought he was about to pass out, but then she bit into his right shoulder drawing blood and he spilled his seed into her as they both moaned loudly. His "choking" stopped, but his head lolled. He'd never come so hard in his life! His dick was soft.

Mrs. Solo got up and released his restraints, but he didn't move right away. "Matt" was spent. Natalie kissed him deeply and asked. "You still up for that massage, Matt?"

"Mrs. Solo, I think you've broken me. That was incredible! How did you know?"

"You're just like my husband, Matt. You so badly want to be of service, but sometimes you need to be serviced and you don't know how to ask. I'd really love it if you met him one day. You have so much in common.," Natalie said with a sly smile as she went to cleanse "Matt's" chest, abdomen, and shoulder.

"Mrs. Solo, I must apologize, but I can't complete my massage duties today. I hope you will take a rain check. I know you must be going to meet with your husband for dinner. Maybe I will meet him someday, but I think I need some rest. Please forgive me."

"Matt, don't think anything of it. We will meet again when you're feeling better. Next time, don't keep me waiting when I ask you what you need!," Natalie said as she nipped at "Matt's" bottom lip.

"I won't, Mrs. Solo. Thank you so much.," "Matt" said as he picked up his clothes, kissed her quickly, and left the room. 

Natalie couldn't wait to meet her husband for dinner. She headed to the shower where her dinner clothes were and she prepared herself with a quickness in her step and a song in her heart. 

Natalie made her way down to the restaurant to meet Ben. This ritual had become an unofficial anniversary since 2 years ago for them. She waited a few minutes before Ben showed up at their table. She stood up to greet him with a hug and kiss. He, of course, looked gorgeous in his suit as always.  
"Hi baby! You look tired. Is everything alright?," she said with a knowing look.

"I got an unexpected, but much appreciated surprise."

"Would you like to hear about my massage, Ben?"

"Well, I heard it had to be postponed, Nat. I apologize for Matt's inability to perform, but it shouldn't become a regular occurrence."

"Please, Ben. Don't hold it against him. I can be very demanding at times. I'm starved, let's eat."

They sat down to their meal and took pleasure in each other's company. After they finished dinner sans dessert because Nat said she had that taken care of, they returned to their hotel room. After they closed the room door, Ben picked Nat up and she wrapped her legs around his hips. They kissed deeply and Ben walked them toward the bedroom. When they got to the bed, he gently laid them down on the bed and continued to kiss his wife passionately. They slowly removed each other's clothes until they were bare and laying against each other. Nat moved her hand into Ben's hair and gently pulled on it as he moaned. "I have a surprise for you, baby. Gimme just a minute.," Nat said as she walked her naked self out of the room and Ben followed her with his eyes. She returned with some honey and whipped cream. Surprisingly, they had never incorporated food into their sex before. Ben licked his lips in anticipation. Natalie held up the containers in front of Ben. "Do you have a preference, baby?"

"Honey first, whipped cream later."

"Where would you like me to start, Ben?"

"Start at the top and work your way down, baby!"

"Ok, let's get started!," Natalie said as she used the Force to hold Ben's hands above his head while she took the lead with the honey.

"How did I lose control here?" 

"Admit it, you like it when I take control! It's much more fun!," Natalie said as she dripped a small amount of honey on Ben's nose and licked it off. She dribbled more on his lips which she playfully licked at lightly until she plunged her tongue deeply into his mouth. When she pulled away from his mouth, he tried to chase her with his lips. Honey dribbled from his mouth and down his neck. Nat moved her tongue down his neck to catch the dribbling and Ben moaned at her ministrations. At that moment, Nat said very seriously, "I can't help but notice that you have some curious marks on your body, Ben! Would you like to tell me how you got them?"

"Well, on the way here I got attacked by killer mosquitos. They can be very deadly. I'm lucky to have gotten away with what I did, baby!"

"Killer mosquitos, huh? Well, I'll just have to avoid those areas then. Is that ok with you, Ben?"

"Yes, baby. Please continue taking control of this situation!!"

Natalie went about her business with the honey and avoided the "mosquito bitten" areas. She dribbled more honey on both of his nipples and played with each one until they peaked. She continued down his abdomen and sucked a bruise into the untouched area before dribbling more honey there and lapping it up. Ben continued to moan with each action. "Baby, please? I need you!"

"Shhh, be patient, Ben. You know I'm gonna take care of you, baby." Ben had precome running down to his balls. Nat cleaned up the precome with her mouth and proceeded to cover Ben's dick and balls with honey. She carefully took Ben's balls into her mouth and rolled them around. Ben's eyes rolled to the back of his head and he moaned. After she had cleaned his balls of the honey, she moved up to lick from the base of his dick to the head. When she got to the head, she took it into her mouth and started to bob. Ben's precome mixed with Natalie's saliva and the honey as she looked into Ben's eyes while she was giving him head. Ben thought he might come just from that. The sounds she was making nearly drove him over the edge. "Nat, come up here so I can kiss you, please?"

She obliged him and kissed him with her honey sweetened, precome laden mouth. Ben moved from her mouth to all the areas where he could see the honey had touched. "Please let my hands free, baby, so I can cover you in whipped cream and lick it off." Again, Nat obliged him. He could have bound her hands with the Force as well, but he loved it when she used her hands. Ben started with the whipped cream on Nat's lips. He proceeded to slowly lick it off and a bit ran down her face to her neck. He followed the trail of the dribbling cream to her neck and lightly nipped at it before licking the area clean where cream and honey had mingled on her skin. He sprayed more cream on her chest and began to lick at her mastectomy scars. He nipped at them a bit and he heard Nat inhale due to the sensitivity. He could see her pupils were blown wide with lust. He was tempted to move lower and fuck her right now, but he waited. He cleaned up the mess on her chest with his mouth and moved down to her abdomen. He lightly licked at her C-section scar. He had never spent much time on that one. Nat seemed to be insecure about it more than any of her other scars. He couldn’t' understand why. It was the least conspicuous scar she had and her stomach looked fine due to the abdominal exercises she did. It seemed to be the most natural one of all of them because it's how their children came into the world. He took care to spray a perfect line of cream on the scar. He slowly lapped up the cream there and he could feel Nat's hand in his hair. Love, warmth, and appreciation flowed through their bond. 

Ben moved down to her clit after he spread Nat's legs. He gave it a couple licks without a spray of cream and he buried his nose in the small amount of pubic hair that was there after the waxing. She always smelled like home to him and he liked being home. He sprayed some whipped cream from her clit down to her vagina. He fucked her vagina with his tongue and when he came back up, he had some whipped cream on his face and nose. He knew he looked silly, but he didn't care. He rubbed his face in her crotch and got more messy. He returned to her clit and sucked it lightly as Nat grabbed his hair with both hands. He licked at her clit a few times before Nat dragged him back up to kiss her. They were both messy from the honey and whipped cream mingling on their bodies. They kissed passionately for a few minutes before Natalie wrapped her legs around Ben's hips to signal him she was ready. "Fuck me now, Ben! Please!"

Ben moved to line himself up so he could oblige her. When he was seated fully inside her, they both took a moment to settle themselves after they shuddered before they moved. Ben bent Natalie in half and fucked into her as she moved her hips to meet him. They fucked each other slowly and deeply. They were both so close. They kissed and licked at each other's faces as they looked in each other's eyes. Ben could feel each time Nat clenched around him and they would get closer to the edge. He ramped up his rhythm and Nat matched him. They both screamed in ecstasy as they came together. 

Ben laid gently on top of Nat. They were exhausted and filthy. "How'd you like my surprise, Ben?"

"Loved it. We should do it again sometime. We should get in the shower and clean up before we pass out.," Ben said breathing heavily.

They got up and got in the shower to clean up their mess. When they got out of the shower, they still had to put clean sheets on the bed so they worked together to take care of it. When the clean sheets were on the bed, they both plopped in it to rest. 

"I've got another surprise for you, Ben."

"If it's anything like the last one, I'll need a few hours to rest."

"Nothing like that. I'm gonna save it till I get back from seeing Luke and Hux and you get back from Leia's."

"What if I don't want to wait that long, baby?"

"Well, maybe if you play your cards right you can get it out of me somehow."

"Ok, I'll try later. Let's sleep for now. " Ben moved down to rest his head on Natalie's stomach and she ran her hands through his hair. They were asleep in minutes. They were clearly exhausted cause they slept until the alarm. They both awoke at the alarm tentatively, but they rolled out of bed to get ready to leave the hotel and return to their children. Joffrey picked them up as usual and they slid into the back seat of the limousine as he held the door open. After Joffrey closed the car door, Ben started staring at Nat. She looked so beautiful. "What, Ben? Is something on my face?"

"I think you missed a spot, Mrs. Solo. Please excuse us, Joffrey!," Ben said as he raised the privacy window. Ben proceeded to nip and lick at Nat's ear where he had found a spot of honey that was missed by their showers. Natalie laughed and sighed, "I'm not ready to go home just yet, baby."

"I know, but the kids need us and we'll get more alone time when we go see my mom. You gonna tell me my other surprise?"

"Not yet. You're not gonna get it out of me like this."

"Ok, keep your secret. I can be patient. It can wait until we get back if you insist, Mrs. Solo."

"Wow, you really have gotten soft. You used to interrogate people for Force sake! You gonna let this go so easily, Ben?"

"Is that a challenge? I could just tickle you until you tell me.," Ben tickled Nat around her middle and under her arms until she shrieked loudly. No secret was forthcoming. "Boy, you're tough. You're right, I have to improve my technique.," Ben ran his tongue from behind her ear and down her neck to explore it. He knew she loved it when he played with her neck. He enjoyed making her feel good and he could care less about extracting secrets from her right now. Nat would tell him when she was ready and they only had so much time to play around until they got back home. 

___________________________________________________________________

Ben and Natalie had arrived at the former Resistance base where Leia maintained her home the previous day. Leia had pulled away from conflict and politics so she could focus on her friend and family ties. Luke and Hux took over planning and organization of the new government. Nat was coming back to check on their progress and offer any support that she could. She had developed working relationships and friendships with both Luke and Hux. Ben chose to stay out of that business and focus on the kids when they made their trips back to visit. Nat had left a few hours earlier on the ship that Hux sent to retrieve her for their meetings. Chewie was visiting this time around. He had chosen to forgive Ben for what happened to Han because he somehow knew his old friend would have wanted him to. Chewie was great with Lexi and Xander and they seemed to be enthralled with him just as Ben was when he was their age. Ben and Leia had grown in their relationship. They came to confide in each other quite a bit and they seemed to feel Han was there in spirit if not body. They talked while Chewie was entertaining the kids. 

"So how is married life with kids, Ben?"

"It's amazing. It's so far from where I was and what I was doing. I never imagined I could be so happy."

"I'm glad that Natalie came into our lives. She's made so many things possible for us. The Force blessed us with her and those kids."

"What about you, mom? What makes you happy these days now that the Resistance is no longer needed?"

"I love having the option to do nothing or to do something with my time. I discuss things with Luke and Hux when they ask for advice and they've offered me a place at the table if I want it. I love being a grandmother and I wish I could see Lexi and Xander more often."

"They love you too, mom. We could try to bring them by more often if you'd like. They are a handful and we'd take whatever alone time we can get at this point. We just want to be the best parents to the kids and spouses to each other we can be. ," Ben said before he yawned. "Honestly, I'm wiped out. Do you mind if I take a nap for a bit, mom?"

"Of course, Ben. Me and Chewie can handle Lexi and Xander until you wake up."

Ben made his way to their room and laid on the bed. He very nearly fell asleep immediately. He started dreaming of Nat. She had just finished meeting with Luke, Hux, and others. Luke, Hux, and Nat stayed behind. They were talking about their personal lives after their official business had completed. Luke and Hux were both indulging in some alcoholic beverages, but Nat didn't this time. They were laughing and ribbing each other indicative of how far they'd all come since the truce formed a couple years ago. Nat's eyes blackened as she sensed something was amiss. A small army of people who weren't on board with the formation of the new government inclusive of the remnants of the Resistance, New Republic, and the First Order had infiltrated the planet with weapons including some well placed bombs were on their way to their meeting place likely to eliminate them. Nat alerted Luke and Hux to this and they mobilized to protect themselves and others. The armed men weren't that difficult to handle, but the bombs could be anywhere. Nat and Luke opened their minds and pushed out using the Force to find them. They were able to find a few of them and Hux's men were able to neutralize those bombs. Nat and Luke separated to cover a wider area. Nat put a Force bubble around herself to try to keep safe. She was able to find a cache of bombs that were set to go off in seconds. She warned Luke and Hux of what she found so they could keep others away. She tried to slow down time to give herself more time to get away, but it was too late. The bombs went off with such force that she was thrown back into the surrounding wall. Even with the Force bubble around her, she absorbed enough impact to get injured. While she laid on the ground unconscious, she was bleeding and losing their unborn child…..

Ben awoke in a cold sweat. That wasn’t a dream, it was a premonition of the future. He had to get to Nat right now. He couldn't contact her through their bond. She always closed it when she met with Luke and Hux. Ben bolted from the bed to talk to Leia.

"Mom, I need to leave right now! Nat's in trouble. Can you and Chewie stay with kids please? I don't know when I'll be back."

"Of course, Ben. Is there anything else I can do?"

"Just keep the kids safe for me, please. I'll contact you as soon as I can.," Ben ran from the house with that to prepare his ship for departure. 

Ben flew through his preflight checks and started the ship's engine. He left the planet's atmosphere in record time. "Please hold on, baby. I'm coming."

_______________________________________________________________________

 

The meeting was finishing up. Natalie was making annual appearances to check on the progress of the new government. Truthfully, she wasn't contributing much, but they insisted on her continued involvement to make sure that everyone was being honest with their intentions. Not everyone was happy with the new government, but she knew it was a small minority and they were actively working to keep the bloodshed at a minimum. The minority was even offered a seat at the table, but had yet to take it at this point. As the meeting ended, Poe Dameron glanced at Hux a little too long and Natalie noticed it. When Poe and others were gone from the room leaving Luke, Hux, and Natalie to their own devices, Natalie smirked and said, "Hux, please tell me it's serious with you and Dameron! You make a cute couple!" Hux exhaled, but couldn't help but smile at her. "We are very… close, but I still don't know what is going to happen in the future." 

"Hux, I never knew you were such a masochist. Dameron was the principal one responsible for Starkiller's destruction."

"Yes, that irony is not lost on us, Natalie. We are trying to channel our efforts in a more positive direction."

"Luke, how's Wedge?"

"Wedge is good. He is quickly tiring of my involvement in the building of this new government. He wants to focus on traveling and spending more time together. I wasted so much time isolating myself from others and I don't want to risk my relationship because I'm overcommitted. I'm hoping that Dameron would be willing to take my role in a more permanent sense."

"I'm sure Hux wouldn't have a problem with that."

By this time in their previous meetings, they were all working on their second drinks. Luke and Hux couldn't help but notice that Natalie was drinking water. 

"Why aren't you drinking, Natalie?," Hux queried.

Luke looked at her face and she demurred. "You're pregnant! I should have picked up on it by now. Congratulations! You haven't told Ben yet, have you?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise so I would appreciate it if both you kept your mouths shut about it for now!!"

"Come now, you know we aren't gossips here. Congratulations! You're building quite the family, aren't you? Are you and Ben gonna be responsible for the return of the Jedi academy all by yourselves?," Hux said with a smirk.

"No Jedi or Sith aspirations for my kids. If we can just teach them to be responsible with their powers, that's enough. Besides, this is gonna be the last one. I'm getting too old to be having babies and raising children. You should try it, Hux. You and Dameron would make some beautiful children!"

"Not sure if we're ready for that yet, but I have thought about it. I'm not sure I'd make a good role model for a child and I certainly didn’t learn how to be a good parent from my family."

"Hux, I was never blessed by the Force to have children. Mostly because of my own stubborn adherence to Jedi tenets that I know now make no sense, but I realized that if you have love in your life that there is room for children. No matter what your past. Wedge and I are thinking of adopting ourselves."

"Well, if either of you need practice, Ben and I would be happy to let you babysit Lexi and Xander for a little while. That should convince you either…," Natalie said before her eyes blackened.

"What happened?," Hux said.

"We're about to be under attack. The minority group has an incursion planned. They managed to plant some bombs around the complex. We don't have a lot of time before they try to breach the building, but we need to find those bombs right away!"

"I'll notify security right away.," Hux said as he left the room

"Luke, you and I have got to find these bombs! I'll stay in contact." They both set off in opposite directions. 

_____________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben landed his ship on the planet where Nat was meeting with Luke and Hux. He had been there before on one of their last visits. He ran to the complex where he was sure they all would be. Their bond was still closed and he knew time was running out. He could hear some weapons discharge so he followed it. He found Hux there in general mode. They had managed to stop the incursion with minimal injuries and had arrested the culprits. "Hux, where's Nat?"

"Ben, she and Luke are out looking for the bombs that were set. Neither of them has contacted me recently."

"What direction did she go in? I have to find her!"

"I'm not sure. I left the room before she and Luke could tell me what their plans were."

Ben was getting frustrated, but he needed to stay calm. "Uncle, where are you?," Ben projected to Luke.

"I'm on the eastern side of the complex. I haven't found much, but I have been able to disarm the bombs I have found. Have you heard from Natalie?," Luke projected back. 

"No, I need to find her, uncle! I had a premonition from the Force. She's in danger!"

"She went in the opposite direction from me and I haven't heard from her since then. "

"I'm headed that way. If you hear from her, tell her I'm here looking for her and to be careful!"

Ben ran off in the westerly direction to look for Nat.

Nat had opened her mind and pushed out with the Force to find this concentration of energy. When she walked into the building, she could see a multitude of bombs that had been set. She could see from the countdown that time was running out. She'd only be able to slow down the time so much. She surrounded herself with a Force bubble to protect herself and the baby. She alerted both Luke and Hux of her findings and advised that they needed to get everyone out of the immediate area. "Natalie, Ben is here looking for you!," Luke said.

What was Ben doing here? His timing was awful. She could hear Ben calling out to her and she ran toward him. "What the fuck are you doing here, Ben? This place is about to blow up! We have to go now!"

"I came for you and the baby! The Force showed me that you were in danger!"

Natalie stilled herself. She placed a Force bubble around the bomb area so it would implode rather than explode or at least she hoped it would work that way. Nat grabbed Ben's hand and Force folded them to a less densely inhabited area on the planet. They were safe and it appeared that the bubble around the bombs worked. She contacted Hux and Luke and the reports were that no one was hurt by the bombs. Natalie took some deep breaths and turned to Ben. "Are you alright, Ben?"

"I'm just fine. I thought I was gonna lose you and the baby. I had to come.," Ben said as he kissed her face and neck.

"What did you see?"

"I saw you trying to slow down time. I saw you put a Force bubble around yourself, but the blast from the bombs was too strong. You got thrown back and you got hurt. You were bleeding and losing the baby."

"I'm sorry you saw that, baby. You showing up probably saved us. I changed how I dealt with the bombs because you were here. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the baby. I wanted to surprise you."

"Well I'm surprised and happy that you're both fine. " Ben kissed her full on the lips and proceeded to kiss her deeply. Nat carded her hands through Ben's hair and she felt his hands move to grab her ass. He lifted her up in the air and she wrapped her legs around his hips. She could feel his erection through his clothes.

"I'm gonna fold us back to the ship so we can have some privacy, ok?"

"Good idea, someone could see us here."

Natalie Force folded them back to Ben's ship. Ben walked them back to his bed. "Are you gonna tell me how inappropriate it is for me to be hard after we just avoided getting killed?"

"Ben, I've given up trying to figure out our psychosexual responses. As long as it's consensual and we enjoy it, I don't care."

Ben smiled. "I love you so much, Nat. I could never be with anyone else. I'll always do anything in my power to keep you with me. I'd do anything for you and our children. I can't lose you again." Ben's smile gave way to some tears. 

"Hey, you know I feel the same, don't you? You know I love you, right?"

"I know you love me, Nat. I just am always afraid of losing you or the kids. I just want to protect you all and I'm scared I won't be there when I need to be."

Nat moved to straddle Ben in the bed and stroked his facial scar. "What can I do to reassure you?"

"Short of us barricading ourselves in the house, I have no idea. I've been searching for that sense of belonging and home that I have with you and the kids all my life and now that I've found it, I can't let it go.," Ben said as the tears started to flow more.

"Baby, please don't be sad. We have so much to be thankful for. We have a baby coming and 2 wonderful kids. We have great friends and family. We have each other and we're both strong with the Force. Let's just try to enjoy it, ok?," Natalie said as she lightly kissed Ben's face and neck.

Ben stopped the tears and surrendered to Nat's ministrations. He carded his hand through Nat's hair as she moved her lips and tongue down his neck, chest, and abdomen. They removed each other's clothes until they were bare against each other. Natalie moved back up to Ben's mouth to kiss him deeply. "What do you need? Tell me, Ben."

"I need all of you. I need to be surrounded by you. I need to be inside you and feel at home. I need you to touch me. I just need you so badly all the time."

"I know what you need, baby. You need me to control you, don't you?," Natalie said as she tightly gripped the nape of Ben's hair and nipped at his ear and jawline with her teeth. "You don't have to be afraid. I feel it. I told you I've stopped questioning why we want what we do. I've always accepted you for what you are and you've done the same for me. You trust me, don't you?"

"Yes, Nat. I do.," Ben said as he was shaking with need and relaxing into Natalie's touch.

"I'm gonna make you wait to come, Ben. You're gonna beg me to let you come and I'm not gonna let you until I'm ready. You're gonna be so grateful for it.," Natalie whispered into Ben's ear and she knew he was getting harder. 

"Please, Nat. I need you."

"You know I love it when you beg, but you will wait until I'm ready. Do I need to restrain you, Ben or will you be good for me?," Natalie said looking into his eyes.

"I'll be good."

Natalie went back to Ben's body to bite an unscarred area of his abdomen. Ben winced as she bit him, but relaxed when a bit of blood started to flow and stained her lips. He thought he could burst with how much he wanted to come, but he would follow Nat's instructions. She lapped at the wound she just made. She licked her lips and Ben shuddered. She moved down to his dick to clean up the precome that had dribbled nearly down to the bed sheets. As Natalie took the head of Ben's dick into her mouth, she stared into his eyes. Ben was so close and she knew it, but she also knew that he could wait for a little bit longer. As she bobbed her head over his dick, she held his dick at the base so he wouldn't come. When she moved on from giving him head, she would use the Force to act as a cock ring. 

She took her mouth off Ben's dick and went to straddle him. She rubbed her crotch on his dick to continue torturing him. Natalie played with his nipples until they peaked and then she nipped at them but not enough to draw blood. She kept the eye contact with Ben to heighten his arousal. "Please let me come, baby. Please.," Ben projected to her.

"Turn over onto your stomach.," She projected back. Ben complied and she could hear him whimper when the sheets contacted his dick. Natalie picked a spot in the middle of his back to bite until he bled. While she was lapping up the blood, she could feel him moving his hips slightly to rut on the sheets. "No, that is not allowed, Ben. Keep it up and I'll punish you. You understand?," she said as she smacked him hard on his ass eliciting a yelp from him. Natalie proceeded to bite him until he bled on the reddened area she just smacked on his ass. After she lapped up the blood, she gave him a matching bite on the opposite cheek. 

"I'm gonna clean you up, baby, and then I'll think about letting you come. Stay where you are until I get the antiseptic." She went to the refresher to grab what she needed. Ben was in the same place when she returned .

"You're being so good, Ben. Let me take care of your wounds." She cleaned up the bites on his ass and his back. "Turn over, Ben." He complied with a whimper. He trembled with need. Natalie cleaned up his abdominal wound. She got up from the bed to put back the antiseptic. She returned to the bed and Ben was in the same place with his needy dick. "Sit on the edge of the bed, Ben." Ben followed the instructions. He looked just like a puppy with those eyes. It would be over soon. Natalie straddled him and looked deeply into his eyes. She kissed Ben deeply and he responded as if he was a starving man just given a meal. He didn't dare touch her until she said it was ok. They had done this enough for him to know what would get him punished and what wouldn't. "Can I touch you, baby?," Ben projected to Natalie.

"You can touch me, but I will still direct you, understand?," Natalie projected back as she grabbed his chin with her hand to emphasize her point. Ben nodded in agreement. He placed his hands on her low back and hoped that she would let him move lower. Natalie lowered herself onto Ben's dick and he startled. Nat still had the Force cock ring on him. She began to thrust her hips slowly while she kissed him passionately. She felt so good. She ramped up her rhythm and Ben wished he could feel his balls slapping on Nat's ass because it might relieve some of the pressure of needing to come.

"I heard that, Ben. You're so close to getting what you want. It would be a shame for you to screw it up now!"

"I'll be good, Nat." She could feel his desperation to come, but it wasn't outweighed by his need to please her. 

"Lay back on the bed, Ben." He did so while she was still fucking him a little faster.

"You can touch my hips and ass now and you can fuck me back, Ben." Ben obliged her and he was absolutely desperate to come now. 

After a few thrusts, Natalie released the Force from Ben's dick and they both came hard with pent up screams. They exhaustedly kissed and held each other.

"I love you, baby," Ben said.

"I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had originally planned for this to be the end, but I couldn't edit myself. I probably got carried away. I went back and reread the story a ton and felt I had more to say. Let me know what you think!!


	51. The One Who Makes Me Crazy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie talks to the leader of the minority group and tries to bring them into the fold. Ben starts to question Natalie and Hux's relationship. Hux finds his soulmate.

After Ben and Natalie cleaned themselves up and redressed, they returned to the complex to assist Hux and Luke with the minority group members' interrogation. Natalie took over from Hux and Luke since she had taken her extended "break" with Ben. They hadn't gotten very far. Hux wasn't able to get anything from them and Luke was only able to perceive their anger without determining the reason for it by the time Natalie showed up.  
They were more than happy for Natalie to take over so they could wrap things up quickly and get back to their lives. Natalie pushed outward with the Force and determined who the leader was among them so she could speak with her directly. Iliana Sequeira had so much anger rolling off of her. She had lost her entire family in the destruction of the Hosnian system as had many in her group. 

"I'm Natalie Solo, may I call you Iliana?"

"Are you a Jedi?"

"No, I'm something else."

"You are in league with the Jedi and the Starkiller, are you not?"

"If you mean Luke and Hux, I'm not in league with them. I want to stop the useless killing. I'm sorry about your family and nothing I say or do will bring them back. You have to know that you would have just inflicted the same hurt on others as you have suffered. What did you hope to gain with this plan?"

"I won't allow people to forget what they have done to me."

"Iliana, no one wants to forget. We are trying to stop anyone from having to suffer like you have. Join us so you can have a say in what happens going forward."

"How can you work with them? They are murderers!"

"If those bombs had gone off, you would be no better! You have to know that! Years from now, some child of a person you would have killed would be looking for the same revenge on you. The cycle would never end!"

Iliana's eyes were brimming with tears. "I miss them so much. They were all I had. I don't know how to go on from here. "

"This has been eating you up for years. You have to let it go before you disappear and become a shadow of what you were, Iliana. I can't say I know exactly what you are going through, but I have struggled in my life. It was hard, but I pushed through it to find true happiness. I know there is someone in your life that loves you, but you haven't allowed it because of this vendetta. If you open your heart to him, you can be happy. I'm not telling you to forget your family, but you are still here and they wouldn't want you to give up your life or for you to take someone else's life for them."

"I can't just walk away from this. I have made promises to my people."

"I can help you talk to them. Make them see their place is with us rather than against us. No one wants to harm you. We just want everyone to be safe. After you talk with them then we can all get together to discuss the possibility of a truce and you joining with us. If you refuse, that is ok. But know that I will not allow anyone to be harmed by your group."

"That is fair. Let me speak to my people alone before you come in and then we'll see."

Natalie talked to Hux and he allowed Iliana to meet with her people. Natalie turned the cameras off so they could speak in private because she would know if they meant to do any harm. Hux didn't approve, but couldn't do anything about it anyway. Iliana spoke with her group for the better part of an hour. When she came out, Natalie could tell the group was in a better place mentally, but they would reserve judgment until they met with the larger group of representatives. An emergency meeting was called and all representatives returned to meet with the minority group. Ben invited himself to the meeting to make sure things would be ok, not because he didn't trust Nat's judgment but because he wanted to make sure they left together in one piece. The meeting was long and a lot of venom was thrown Hux's way. He handled it gracefully without verbal reprisal. At the end, Iliana's group would only be willing to continue talks to join if Natalie stayed involved regularly. For the good of the galaxy, Natalie agreed. Ben didn't like it, but that meant he would be involved as well. Another meeting was set and Iliana's group was offered quarters in the complex which they did accept with the understanding that they would be monitored closely. After the larger meeting broke up, Luke, Hux, Ben, and Natalie stayed behind for further discussion. 

"Are you sure you want to do this, Nat? This is way more involved that you wanted to be.," Ben said.

"I have to. Iliana trusts me now, but the group's trust is very tenuous."

"We probably should have kept them under lock and key. We can't just trust them right away after they tried to blow up everyone earlier.," Hux said.

"I have to agree with Hux wholeheartedly on this one, Natalie.," Luke said.

"Hux, we have to handle this very carefully. Your involvement is what is making this difficult, but you are key to getting this government off the ground. Are you ok? They said some pretty nasty things in there.," Natalie said exhibiting some concern that bothered Ben quite a bit. Ben knew Natalie had always had a soft spot for Hux. He wasn't jealous, but he never felt Hux was deserving of Nat's friendliness toward him. 

"I'm tougher than I look, Natalie. Thank you for your concern, but since you have set loose these terrorists on our complex, I need to assure that security is bolstered. I will take my leave now. Goodnight all."

"Hux, I'm coming with you to make sure that you don't overstep if you don't mind. Ben, can you wait here for me? I promise I won't be long. Goodnight, Luke.," Natalie said as she kissed Ben quickly and left to follow behind Hux.

Luke and Ben were left alone in the conference room and Luke could sense Ben's annoyance. 

"Ben, are you alright? I can sense you are upset about something."

"Uncle, do you know what is going on between my wife and Hux? She is very loyal to him and for the life of me, I can't understand why!"

"Ben, why don't you discuss it with Natalie? You two have a very good relationship from what I can see."

"I'm not jealous, Uncle. I've known Hux for a lot longer than Nat and we were never close. He is not the type of person I ever thought Nat could be friends with."

"I'm sure you wouldn't have thought that I could be friends with Natalie after I teamed up with Snoke to try to kill her and your children, but I consider her to be a great friend. Just talk with her, Ben. Don't let this fester. You and she have been through enough turmoil. Some of which was caused by myself. I'm sure you will be fine. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Uncle." Ben sat there waiting for a while and then he got antsy. He wasn't jealous of Hux, was he? When he and Hux worked together, he was never sure of his motives. This was crazy. He and Nat were about to have their third child and they had just made love hours ago. He was tired and he really wanted to get them back to their children as soon as possible. He needed to stretch his legs a bit. He would walk around a little before he and Nat settled in for the night. He could see the increase in security on his walk. Everyone knew who he was so no one approached him. After he did a lap around the complex, he started to feel better. He really needed some sleep. On his way back to the conference room, he could see Nat and Hux talking. They were engrossed in conversation and smiling at each other. Luke was right. Ben needed to talk to Nat about this before his anger got out of control. He walked quickly over to where they were talking. "Nat, we need to talk right now!," Ben said without acknowledging Hux's presence. 

"Well, it is getting late, Natalie. Again, congratulations. Goodnight, Ben.," Hux said as he walked away.

"What's wrong, Ben?"

"I need to talk to you right now!"

"I know the kids are fine. Why were you so rude to Hux?"

"Can you get us back to the ship so we can talk in private?"

Natalie Force folded them back to Ben's ship. "So what is wrong, Ben? I know you're upset because I'm more involved than I expected---"

"What is going on with you and Hux?"

"What do you mean, Ben?"

"Why are you so attached to him? You told him that you were pregnant before you even told me?"

"I didn't mean for that to happen. He and Luke figured it out when I wasn't drinking after the meeting. Are you jealous of Hux' and mine's relationship, Ben? You are being absurd!"

"What relationship could you possibly have with that ginger fuck?"

"We are friends! That's it. I'm friends with Luke. I'm friends with Twitch. I have other male friends and you don't have a problem with those. What is this about, Ben? All of a sudden, you don't trust me?"

"Of course, I trust you, Nat. I've never trusted him. Sure he saved my life once, but he always had ulterior motives for everything he did. Why would you want to be friends with him?"

"Ben, you need to talk to Hux right now! Don't you dare lay a hand on him or try to enter his mind cause I will know! Use your words! Don't come back here until you settle this with him!" Natalie Force folded them back to the complex and left Ben to find and talk with Hux. 

Ben made his way to Hux' quarters and the whole way he regretted his fight with Nat. He was being an idiot, but he was dying to know what was going on cause it bothered him so much. When he got to the door, he settled himself. He knew Nat would not be pleased if he couldn’t control himself with Hux. He waited a moment and pushed the intercom to let Hux know he was there. Hux answered, "Yes." "I know its late, Hux. I need to speak with you please."

Hux opened the door and let Ben in. "Ben, is everything ok? Have a seat."

Ben took the offered seat. "Hux, I know we've never been close. I need you to tell me what is going on with you and my wife."

"There is nothing going on with me and Natalie. We are just friends."

"That's what she told me, but I know there is something more. I wouldn't blame you if you were in love with her, but you have to know it's not going any further."

"Ben, I'm not in love with your wife. I promise you. She's not my type."

"Why is she so loyal to you? There's something you're not telling me."

"She's kept a secret for me and she's been very trustworthy. You know she adores you and those children. You have nothing to worry about from me."

"How is it that I knew you for 6 years and we hated each other, but you know my wife for a third of that time and you two are so close?"

"I never hated you, Ben. You have to know that Snoke played us against each other because we were both so ambitious. If I hated you, I wouldn't have put myself at risk to save you on Starkiller."

"You only saved me because Snoke would have killed you, Hux. I appreciated it, Hux, but I'm no fool."

"You know, Ben, for a Force user you are spectacularly dense and foolish. You are here with me trying to find a reason to continue to hate me instead of with your pregnant wife who loves you and those children more than anything. You are the luckiest man in the galaxy and you are wasting your time with me."

Ben thought about what Hux said and he was right, but he could sense something else about how Hux felt for him. 

"You said you didn't hate me, so how did you feel about me, Hux?"

"Is it really necessary to continue this conversation, Ben?"

"Yes, I need to know."

"I was in love with you, Ben."

"In love? With me? We were awful to each other. We barely had civil conversations, Hux."

"I think I saw in you someone who was a kindred spirit who in the right set of circumstances could have been a person I could be with."

"Hux, you could have been with anyone on that ship! They were all in awe of you and half of them fantasized about you constantly. I think part of me was jealous that they all panted after you. I was a horrible person then."

"So was I, Ben. I could never have been with a subordinate. We were co-commanders. You were the only possible person that I could have been involved with and not have it be horribly inappropriate."

"Why didn't you tell me, Hux?"

"You just said so yourself. We could barely speak without having an argument. I thought maybe after Starkiller there would have been a chance, but you disappeared and when you returned, you were married with children. When I met your wife, I knew she was the one for you. She picked up on my secret and used it against me. I respected the hell out of her for it, but I instantly knew I could trust her. You said you were a horrible person and that changed when you met Natalie. I think that she changed me too for the better. She is your soul mate and she is my friend. Can you live with that, Ben?"

"Yes, Hux. I'm sorry for my behavior. Can we try to be friends?"

"I would like that. I need all the friends I can get at this point."

"Well, I hope I haven't ruined your night with my crazy insecurities. If you'll excuse me, I have to go home to my wife and have her read me the riot act that I so richly deserve."

"You'll be fine. If you're smart, you'll just listen to what she says and just go with it. That's what I tend to do."

Ben and Hux shook hands and Ben walked toward Hux's door to leave. Poe was there about to hit the intercom. "Ben, hi. Am I interrupting?"

"No, Poe, I was just leaving. Have a good night both of you."

Poe came in to Hux's quarters. "Are you ok, Armie? You told him, didn't you?"

"I told him, but it's fine. I got over Ben a long time ago. We weren't meant to be. He found someone who he was meant for and so did I.," Hux said as he went to grab Poe's hand. 

"Who would have thought that destroying Starkiller would have led to this? "

"If anything, I've learned that the universe continues to be full of surprises, Mr. Dameron. If you don't mind, let's move this conversation to the bedroom."

"I thought you'd never ask, Hux."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to end the story, but I keep finding things I want to explore. Not sure if that's a good or bad thing. Let me know what you think!!


	52. The One Who Knows Me Better Than Anyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut with some Force weirdness!!

Ben made his way by foot back to his ship. He really fucked up royally and he knew it. When he got on the ship, Natalie was there waiting for him. She was silent and apparently waiting for him to speak. Ben thought things out before he spoke.

"Baby, I'm very sorry for my behavior. I didn't mean to accuse you of anything. Hux told me how he felt about me and I know I don't have anything to worry about from him. I should never have tried to bring him into our relationship. My insecurity is what led to this. Please forgive me for my stupidity."

Natalie looked at him and smiled. "That was actually a very good apology, Ben. But I won't leave it there. When I got sicker, you had to give up your training. I think you need it or some sort of hobby or job. You're a wonderful father and husband, but that doesn't mean you have to give up things that you like to do. You need other things in your life so you don't drive yourself crazy like you just did. Baby, I've done everything I can to rid you of your insecurities, but it's not enough. You can open yourself to new possibilities and still be the husband and father that me and the kids need you to be. "

Ben listened to what Nat said and he could hear the truth in it. "I just didn't want to make the mistakes my parents made. I wanted to be as available to you and the kids as possible. I don't want you or the kids to question whether I love you or not like I did with my parents."

"I know that you love me. The kids know that you love them. You need to learn to love you, Ben. I know that is easier said than done. I will do whatever I need to do to help you. As a matter of fact, I think I have an idea. I might need your help with the execution of it though."

"What's your idea, Nat?"

"Well, our bond allows us to feel what the other feels, but I want us to actually experience what the other person actually experiences. You see where I am going with this?"

"I get it, Nat. We should probably both meditate before we do this. "

"I agree, but let's go to sleep now. I'm exhausted and I'm sure you are too."

"Do you forgive me, Nat?"

"Yes, Ben, I forgive you. I love you that means I forgive you by default. Come here, baby." Natalie grabs Ben's face and kisses him deeply. They get in bed and Ben grabs Natalie around her middle while she cards her hands through his hair. They fell asleep almost immediately. 

____________________________________________________________________________

 

After breakfast, Ben and Natalie meditated for a few hours so they could work on their "project". After they came out of their meditations, they talked a bit. 

"Of course, we should try this while we have sex since we are connected so deeply during it. Do you have a problem with that, Ben?," Natalie said with a smile.

"No problem at all, Nat. What else did you come up with?"

"Well, we should try to deepen the bond as we go which means we should go very slowly. This could take all day. Is that a problem?"

"My schedule is clear, baby. We can take as long as we need."

"I also think we should try to hold off on the orgasms as long as we can and maintain eye contact as much as possible."

"We should only use the Force when it comes to the bond and nothing else. I think it's okay for us to talk a little bit during, right?"

"I think it's ok, Ben. Are you worried about this at all? It may change a lot for us."

"More information can only help us, I think."

"Let's get started, ok? I think we should start at the top and work our way down. Use all of our senses."

Natalie slowly removed Ben's clothes while she looked him in the eyes and Ben did the same with her. 

Once they undressed, Natalie straddled him on the bed. She took note of the way Ben's hair smelled of the expensive hair products he liked, the silky feel of his hair In her hands, the sound of his breathing through his nose, the different shades of brown she could see in his eyes as the light hit it from different angles, and the slight saltiness from a kiss to his lips and mouth that came from the breakfast they just ate. With this, she opened her end of the bond a little more.

From his position underneath her, Ben relished the vanilla scent that Nat always wore, the feel of her loose dark curls giving way as his hands moved through them, the soft sounds of her breathing through her nose, the warmth he could feel and see in almond eyed gaze, the fruity taste of her lips and mouth from the juice she had with breakfast. With this, he opened his end of the bond a little more.

Natalie moved her hand from Ben's hair to his scar and compared it to his surrounding normal skin. She noted the familiar constellation of moles and freckles about his face. She could smell his aftershave faintly, taste a bit of mint near his mouth from toothpaste, and hear a brief clench of his teeth. With this, she opened her end of the bond a little more. 

Ben moved his hand from Natalie's hair to her scar and compared it to her surrounding normal skin. He noted the constellation of moles and freckles about her face. He could smell her skin lotion faintly, taste a bit of mint near her mouth from toothpaste, and hear a catch in her breath. With this, he opened his end of the bond a little more.

"This is very intense already, Ben. Should we keep going?"

"Yes, I think we have to, baby."

Natalie moved her hand down further down to Ben's neck where she could feel and see his carotid pulse throbbing. She ran her tongue along the pulse, felt the warmth from it, faintly tasted sweat on his skin, and heard his steady breathing. With this, she opened her end of the bond a little more. 

Ben moved his hand down to Natalie's neck where he could feel and see her pulse throbbing. He ran his tongue along the pulse, felt the warmth from it, faintly tasted sweat on her skin, and heard her breath catch. He couldn't resist running his tongue along the pulse on the opposite side to repeat the experience for them both. With this, he opened his end of the bond a little more.

Natalie moved down to Ben's chest to play with his nipples which hardened under her touch and mouth. She felt the warmth of his skin and the beating of his heart which she could also hear as she put her ear to his chest. She tasted the salt of his skin and smelled his musky cologne. She could also feel Ben getting hard and dribbling precome. With this, she opened her end of the bond a little more. 

Ben started his ministrations with a deep kiss. He moved his hand slowly from Natalie's neck to her chest. He moves his mouth to her mastectomy scars where he slowly appreciates each scar to elicit the sensitivity he knew was there from previous experience. He could taste the salt on her skin, but he could hear, see, and smell Nat's arousal. He wasn't sure how much longer he could wait at this point. With this, he opened his end of the bond a little more. 

Natalie slowly made her way down to Ben's abdomen. She starts with the Bowcaster wound as she runs her tongue along the rough edges, feeling the warmth and tasting the salt of Ben's skin. She moved to the opposite side of his abdomen to bite the skin until he bled which elicited a moan from him. Ben moved his hand to Nat's hair so he could draw her up to him and kiss her bloody lips. He drew her into a deeper kiss which made them both moan into each other's mouths. Natalie opened her end of the bond a little more and she felt a kind of vibration that caused her some lightheadedness. Ben could also feel it. 

"I have to lay down, Ben. That was weird and a little scary."

"We can stop if you want, Nat. Are you worried about the baby?"

"No, not worried about the baby. I feel an overwhelming need to come right now." She reached up to draw Ben down to her and she kissed him as if her life depended on it. "Please, Ben, I need you. Please."

Ben heard her pleading to come and it reminded him of himself during many of their previous encounters. He was usually the one who was so desperate. "I'll take care of you, Nat. Tell me what you need."

"I need your mouth, please."

Ben opened his end of the bond a little bit more and the vibration happened again without the lightheadedness for either of them. When he made his way down to Nat's clit to start his work and Nat moved her hand to his hair, something strange happened. They could each see things from each other's point of view. "Ben, are you feeling this too?"

"Yes, Nat. Do you want to continue? We can stop if you're uncomfortable."

"No, this is what we wanted."

Ben started to lick at her clit tentatively at first, but then he started to relish what he was doing. Natalie opened her end of the bond a little bit more and her eyes turned black. Ben kept up his ministrations, but his eyes felt weird. He knew something had changed with Nat so he looked up at her and saw that her eyes had blackened, but he could see from her point of view that his eyes had blackened too. He moved up to her face to kiss her and they both stroked each other's scars. The vibration they had experienced was stronger now, but it was much more tolerable. Ben opened his end of the bond a little more. They rested their foreheads together.

"Nat, I love you so much and I know that you love me. I'm afraid all the time that I'm gonna lose you or the kids. I don't know how to stop being so scared all the time." It was Nat's voice coming out of her mouth, but it was Ben that was speaking.

"Ben, how can I help you? I've given you practically everything I am and it's still not enough to calm your fears. I'll always be here for you, but there's a part of you that will never believe that because you think you're not worthy of what the Force has blessed you with." It was Ben's voice coming out of his mouth, but it was Natalie that was speaking.

"I know that if you ever left me that it would be my fault. I've always ruined everything I ever touched." Ben's tears started to stream down Nat's face.

"Ben, you haven't ruined anything for us. We fell in love and started a family. Please love us enough to get past this. I could never love you if you weren't worthy of it. " Nat's tears rolled down Ben's face. Ben proceeded with Natalie's intent to kiss his tears away. Ben's large hands held Natalie's face. "Please just let me love you, please. Don't question it, just let it happen. Just accept it as a gift." Ben kissed Natalie slowly with whispered murmurs of "I love you." between kisses. Ben took one of his hands away from Natalie's face and gently moved her hand to her lower abdomen. "I wasn't supposed to be able to have any more children. Our love and the Force allowed us to have these children. We were meant to be. I'll love you through your fear because it's a part of you for whatever reason. "

"It's not that I don't know that you love me, Nat. My fears are amplified when you separate yourself from me. When you close the bond, I feel so lost. Please don't shut me out any more! I can't take being closed off from you!"

"Ben, why didn't you tell me? I never want to hurt you ever. I'm sorry I made you feel this way. I won't close the bond anymore. It's all my fault, isn't it?"

"No, it isn't, baby. You and the children are the best things in my life. It is my struggle with fear that is at fault, but having the bond open at all times gives me such comfort. It makes me a lot less fearful. Even though I am blessed with the most beautiful and loving wife and children, I can't help being a pain in the ass.," Natalie says as her mouth emits Ben's laugh and her eyes flood with his tears. 

Ben's mouth grinned and then formed Natalie's smile. "You're my pain in the ass, Ben. I wouldn't have it any other way. " Natalie opened her end of the bond a little more, both their eyes returned to their natural browns, and they returned to their own bodies. They stared at each other and stroked each other's faces. Their lips met and it was electric. Their kiss deepened and they relished it as if they would never have it again. Their hands moved over each other's bodies appreciating each part like they had never touched it before. They rolled so Natalie would be straddling Ben, but their mouths didn't stray far from each other for long. They kissed a little more before Natalie seated herself slowly on Ben's dick with his assistance. When she was fully seated on him, they both thought they would come just from that. Natalie rolled her hips as Ben thrusted to meet her. They couldn't resist continuing to sloppily kiss each other as they chased their orgasms. When their orgasms hit, they could feel the vibrations underneath intensifying the heady feelings. This was no ordinary orgasm. It lasted for minutes, but they kept going. Ben opened his end of the bond a little more and the vibrations became stronger. Another orgasm hit them almost immediately and they both screamed in pleasure. Natalie opened her end of the bond just a bit more. Each roll and thrust of the hips brought on another orgasm for them. Their bodies were on autopilot and they were no longer in control. It was amazing and they had never experienced anything like this before with each other or with anyone else. It felt like this could go on forever, was going on forever. Eventually, their bodies succumbed to exhaustion. Natalie collapsed on top of Ben and they were both breathing heavily. The sheets were soaked with come and sweat, but they didn't care. It was minutes before they could even talk to each other because they were so spent. 

Ben spoke first and was still breathing heavily. "I've never come so hard and so much in my life."

"Me neither, baby. How long have we been doing this?"

Ben looked at his timepiece. Nearly an entire day had passed. "It's close to breakfast time again."

"I never thought it was truly possible that I could die from sex, but I think I was close. That was incredible! I'm not sure I could survive it again!"

"Nat, I promise that I don't think I could either. Probably not in this lifetime." Ben tiredly caressed Natalie's face and kissed her lips. "I really am hopelessly in love with you. I need you to take everything you need from me."

"What I need right now, Ben, is some food and drink before I pass out. And judging from all the fluids on the bed, you probably need some too."

Ben smiled. "Ok, just a moment. I don't think I can walk yet. Let's try this. " Ben used the Force to bring some ration bars and water to the bed for both of them. After they inhaled the bars and water, they continued to talk. 

"What do you think about maybe having a position in security for the new government entity? We could talk to Luke and Hux about it. Or when we go back home, maybe you could do some security for Twitch?"

"Whatever I do, I want to make sure I won't be away from you and the kids for long. I know I need to pursue my own interests, but we have another baby on the way. I want to enjoy this pregnancy with you like we weren't able to before."

"That sounds wonderful, baby. Once we wake up from our sex coma, I think we can make that happen. I think I need some more food first though."

Ben obliged her by bringing over more ration bars and water then they both fell asleep until mid evening.


	53. The One Who I'm Desperate To Find

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben tries to become more independent. More provisional government goings-on. Ben gets into some trouble.

Ben and Nat stayed with Leia while awaiting the next meeting with Iliana and the minority group. She enjoyed having Xander and Lexi around so much. Ben and Nat tried not to overuse her babysitting services as they would need her help when the next baby came. Ben contacted Luke and Rey about doing some training with them and they set up some dates to meet. When the time came for Ben to meet with Luke and Rey for a week, he couldn't help feeling fearful. The last time he was away training with Luke and Rey, Nat got kidnapped by some of his Knights. He knew he didn't have to worry about any such thing this time, but that never stopped his fear addled brain before. He and Nat spent the night before he was to leave for training together on his ship. 

"I can tell that you're worried, Ben. What's on your mind?"

"The usual fear I have about being away from you and the kids. It's something I'll have to learn to get past. I think the training will be good for me."

"And you'll be back in time to go to the meeting with me, right?"

"Yes, I will. Now let's stop talking about this and focus on each other. You look so beautiful tonight, baby."

"Ben, I certainly don't feel beautiful. I have been chasing after Xander and Lexi all day while you have been preparing for your trip. I think I'm gonna have to talk with your mother and Chewie about how much they spoil our children. Do you know how many places I found peanut butter today? And Xander can not be left alone in the refresher or else your mother's septic system will explode. What's it gonna be like when they start exhibiting Force powers---"

Ben silenced his wife with a deep kiss then he made his way to her ear to nip and lick at it. He slowly made his way down to her neck to nip and lick at multiple places. She moaned so beautifully when he focused on her neck and his dick got hard immediately. He grasped her hand so he could bring her fingers to his mouth and suck on them. He drew her right index finger in, sucked on it, and tasted…peanut butter? They both laughed. 

"I'm sorry, baby. I guess I missed a spot. I'm actually exhausted. Can we move this into the shower? That way we can get cleaned up while we have some fun. Then we can go to bed. "

They moved into the shower to continue their lovemaking. When they exited the shower, they fell into bed to sleep soundly for the night.

Ben left early the next day after waking up to some early morning kisses and head. He promised to holocall every night.

The training went just fine and Ben enjoyed himself, but he missed his family of course. After a few days of being back at Leia's, they went to the meeting with the minority group. There was still venom being spewed Hux's way, but with less fury. The truce was still tenuous, but at least everyone was still willing to listen. The next meeting was set and wouldn't be for a while so Nat and Ben went back to their home in Seattle. They easily settled back in to a routine with Lexi and Xander while being able to enjoy the pregnancy of their third child. Ben doted on Natalie as much as he could, but she could still do a lot for herself now. 

By the time the next meeting came around, Natalie was 5 months pregnant. The meeting was going as well as could be expected at this point, but things needed to be pressed. When the minority group was asked specifically what could be done to bring them into the fold now, they stated that they would join immediately if Hux were no longer involved in the provisional government. They were told this was nonnegotiable and they had to be accepting of this in order to have a place at the table. Hux assured them that the process would remain completely democratic even with his involvement. Talks stalled at this point and Natalie felt she needed to engage Iliana again. Surprisingly, when they talked, Iliana had come over to Natalie's side on Hux's place in the provisional government, but there were others in her group that would never accept him. They did agree to having Iliana represent them in the government should she choose on a temporary basis while they continued to deliberate on full involvement. While she was talking with Iliana, she could sense that Iliana was conflicted more than with their previous talks. "Iliana, I consider you a friend and I hope you feel the same. If you have reservations about anything, we can talk it through." 

"Natalie, I just…worry for some in my group. There's still a lot of conflict, but it is getting better. I think it will be fine in the end. I hope I can perform in the leadership role I am taking." 

"Is there something else on your mind?"

"I noticed that your husband has been coming to the meetings now. Is he involved in the provisional government too?"

"No, he's just a concerned father and husband. He's just being supportive. And what about you? Have you opened up to the possibility of love yet, Iliana?"

"Yes, his name is Thomas. Unfortunately, he is one of my group that is still grappling with our involvement in the provisional government. It puts a strain on things, but I think we might be strong enough."

"I'd like to meet him one day. Well, I need to get back to the council. It was good to see you. Please let me know if you need help with anything." They shook hands and exchanged goodbyes for now. 

Natalie brought the news of Iliana's proposed involvement back to Hux, Luke, and the rest of the provisional council and they agreed on the minority group's terms. Of course, this was all still contingent on Natalie's continued involvement. At least, now she and Ben could focus on her pregnancy without having to make tons of trips back for meetings. The next meeting was set for 3 months from then so that gave them more time to prepare for the new baby. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

The time between meetings went by fast. Ben, Natalie, and the kids showed up a few weeks early so they could be settled in before the next summit. They dropped Xander and Lexi off with Leia before making their way to the provisional government complex a week early. Ben had taken to early morning running so he could keep up his fitness and to help clear his head. He kissed Nat goodbye before going out each time while she slept and he was usually gone for a few hours. After he explored the area surrounding the complex a bit, he was able to develop more of a routine. After he ran for about an hour, he took a break. He saw two men talking ahead of him. He walked over toward them breathing heavily. "I thought I was the only one out here this time of morning. You guys here for the meeting too?"

"Yes, we are, Kylo!"

As soon as Ben heard that name, he took a step forward and felt something hit him in the head from behind making him fall to the ground disoriented. He was groggy, but his eyes were open and he could see his attacker hit him in his head again before he completely passed out. While Ben was unconscious, they placed a force suppression collar on him. 

Natalie awoke from her sleep with teary blackened eyes and a pain across her pregnant belly. "Ben!" She tried to calm herself. Something pulled Ben out of the Force. She knew he was still alive and he needed her to find him. 

"Luke, I know you felt that.," Natalie projected to him.

"Yes, I did. Are you ok?," Luke projected back.

"I'll be ok. I need you to try looking for him please. He needs our help. Can you please contact Hux so that he can keep any transports from leaving the planet?

"Where are you going to be, Natalie? You're 8 months pregnant! You can't go out there half cocked! Ben would never forgive me if I let anything happen to you!"

"I can take care of myself. I just need to talk to someone. I'll be careful. Thank you, Luke. I'll meet up with you later." With that, Natalie closed their channel to get dressed to go talk to her friend, Iliana.


	54. The One Who Is Taking Risks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie confronts Iliana. Ben takes a beating. Hux discovers Natalie's secret.

Just as Natalie showed up as Iliana's door, Iliana was about to step out of it. "Wow, where would you be going at this hour, Iliana?"

"Natalie, why are you here?"

"I needed to talk to you if you have some time. "

"Of course, I have time for you. What's on your mind?"

"My husband is missing and I need your help to find him."

"Why would you think I know anything about that, Natalie? I barely know him." Natalie could sense Iliana's increasing nervousness.

"Where's Thomas? It's quite early for him to not be here with you." Natalie looked around Iliana's quarters and saw her luggage. "Were you planning on leaving before the meeting, Iliana?"

"I….was just getting ready to leave right after." Iliana couldn't even look Natalie in the eye. Natalie could see right through her.

"You need to tell me where Thomas is, Iliana. Where he is, my husband is. If you tell me now, I promise you no harm will come to him. "

"I don't know. He didn't tell me. He told me he had a plan to get revenge on the First Order, but he shared no details with me. We argued about it, but he wouldn't listen to me. He told me he would be gone for awhile, but that when he got back I needed to be ready to leave. Please don't hurt him. His family died in the First Order's raid on Jakku." Ben had told Natalie about giving the order to kill the entire village in his quest for the map to find his uncle. 

"I need you to think really hard, Iliana. Anything that you know might be able to help me find them."

Iliana calmed herself so she could think. Natalie could feel another twinge in her stomach, but she had to ignore it. "He said something about finding a running path, but I swear to you, Natalie, that is all I know!"

"Ok, don't go anywhere, Iliana. All transports off the planet have been stopped."

"I'm sorry, Natalie. I never meant for this to happen!"

"I know."

Natalie left Iliana's quarters and she heard from Hux. They had found where Ben had likely been attacked. She made her way there while dealing with more tightening in her pregnant belly. Luke and Hux were there with some security team members. They were surrounding an area of concern. When Natalie got there, she could see Ben's blood on the ground. There was a lot of it pooled in one spot. Luke and Hux exchanged worried looks. 

"He suffered a head wound. Head wounds bleed a lot. He is still out there and waiting for us to find him. Were you able to find anything else?," Natalie said to both of them.

"It looks like there were 3 assailants. They had a vehicle, but we lost the tracks not far away from here. This area is not that far from the airfield, but we shut it down so no one could have taken off. They would have had to have an alternate place to keep him on the planet. Unfortunately, there are a lot of uninhabited areas on this part of the planet. It could take days to find him.," Hux said. 

Natalie knew Ben didn't have days. She needed to find him now. "Wouldn't any vehicle that they used have a tracker of some kind?"

"I thought about that and it's been disabled, but if they used the same vehicle to scout locations, we could find them based on that. I'll get the information pulled up shortly.," Hux said as he moved his fingers over his data pad. 

"Luke, were you able to find anything?"

"Unfortunately not. I can't pick up any life signs in the Force, which means that these men probably used some sort of force suppression technology or maybe even ysalamiri, but getting the lizards here would have been somewhat conspicuous. Wherever Ben is, he may not be able to escape without our help. Who did you talk to, Natalie?"

"I spoke with Iliana. Her boyfriend, Thomas, was involved with kidnapping Ben. She didn't have anymore details and she wasn't involved in the planning herself. We should interrogate the remainder of the minority group as soon as possible."

"Hux and I can handle this, Natalie. You need to rest!"

"You know I won't do that and we can end that discussion right now! Let's get to those interrogation rooms, gentlemen!"

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Ben woke up feeling nauseous and having a hell of a headache. He was likely concussed. His captors had bandaged his head at least. He was also separated from the Force for the first time in his life due to the suppression collar they had placed around his neck. Even though he couldn't feel her in the Force right now, he knew Nat was going crazy with worry. If he was honest, he hoped he could find a way out of this on his own so Nat wouldn't put herself and the baby at risk. It looked like the kidnappers had him in some sort of cave. This couldn't have been their initial plan. They had probably wanted to get him on a ship and take him somewhere, but his kidnapping must have been discovered before that could happen. He had no doubt that this was about someone he had wronged when he was Kylo Ren. He probably deserved the punishment. Nat and his children didn't. As long as she and his kids weren't involved, he'd suffer any consequences he needed to. 

"So you're finally awake, Kylo!"

Ben wouldn't talk to them. It wouldn't do him any good at this point. 

"Run out of things to say? I heard the great Kylo Ren was full of snark and snappy comebacks. Cat got your tongue? I wonder how much you would have to say if we brought your pretty little pregnant wife in here with you!"

"Don't you fucking touch her! If you have an issue with me, then take it out on me! She hasn't done anything wrong! She has nothing to do with Kylo Ren! Who did I kill that you loved so much? Your mother, father, your wife---"

"Shut the fuck up, you piece of shit!," Thomas said as he punched Ben in his nose.

Blood flowed from Ben's nose as he laid on the ground and he laughed hysterically. "Is that the best you've got? Your family would be so disappointed in you! Tell me what is the plan here. You thought you could just kill me and get away with it? Were you gonna sell me to a Hutt? They've already shut down the airfield or else you wouldn't have brought me here. They will find us eventually and what then? You and your friends go to prison and it's over! So make all this trouble you went through to get me worth it!! I've been waiting for someone to give me what I deserve! You think you're the one who can do it? If not, then let one of your friends give it a go! Otherwise, you're wasting my fucking time!"

"Fuck you, Kylo! Fuck you!!," Thomas said he kicked Ben repeatedly in his ribs until he got tired. Thomas left the area, disgusted with himself. Ben knew his nose and ribs were broken and blood leaking from his mouth now. He laid on the ground, feeling like he's steered them away from Nat and kids. He was ready to accept whatever fate the Force had decided for him.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Hux quickly reviewed the security footage so they could narrow down their suspects . They first questioned any of the group who had spent time talking with the only person who they knew for sure was involved in Ben's kidnapping, Thomas. Once he had gotten all the footage organized, he happened to look over at Natalie. She was sitting quietly, repeatedly rubbing her pregnant belly, and controlling her breathing as she winced through some obvious pain. "Are you in labor?"

Natalie winced. "It's likely."

"We need to get you to the med bay right now!"

"I can't go to the med bay while we're looking for Ben."

"You can't possibly be serious! You can't be involved in this anymore!"

"Hux, I will not go to the med bay until I find Ben!"

"Well, if I can't talk some sense into you then Luke will!"

"Hux, if you fucking try to leave this room to get Skywalker, I will mind wipe you!"

"You wouldn't dare!"

"You want to try me! Please, I know Ben needs me! This is my fourth baby. I think I can handle this. I promise if it gets to be too much, I will go to the med bay."

Hux didn't like it, but he knew he really couldn't stop her from doing what she wanted. "Ok, but if you put yourself or this baby at any unnecessary risk, this deal is off!"

"I understand. What did you find out?"

"It appears that Thomas was caught by the cameras with these two men the most. Unfortunately, it appears that they are unavailable to be interrogated because they are missing from the minority group that we have tracked down just like Thomas. So it would be reasonable to assume that these two are involved in Ben's kidnapping as well. I checked all of their records in the criminal database and got nothing. Whatever drove these men to kidnap Ben, it's likely personal."

"Iliana told me that Thomas lost his family in the First Order raid on Jakku. The one where Kylo Ren gave the order to kill all the villagers."

Hux went quiet for a moment. "When I built and fired Starkiller, I was so sure I was doing the right thing. Of course, I know it was the wrong thing now, but I affected so many people. Kylo Ren killed lots of people, of course, but why didn't they come after me?"

"Perhaps they thought you were too well protected and they chose a target they could get a lot easier. This isn't your fault, Hux! Let's focus on getting Ben back now. We can deal with all the guilt later. The whole point of the provisional government was to get past the past and start fresh. Clearly, not everyone wanted that, but I will be damned if I will lose Ben because of them!"

"We're running out of leads, Natalie."

"What about the tracker information?"

"We didn't get anything from it. I think they pinned all their hopes on getting the transport off the planet."

"So this was a last minute decision for them to find a place to keep him here? They would need to find a place that had access to food, water, and any supplies they would need. They couldn't count on anyone in the complex being able to help them or being able to come back themselves. That should help us with finding him."

"You're onto something. Let me look at the topography database." Hux's fingers tapped madly on his data pad while Natalie hoped he would find something soon. 

"It looks like there's only a few areas that would meet those criteria. You, I, and Luke should stick together along with a small security force. It will take a little longer to get around, but if they have force suppression tech like Luke believed then we'll at least have strength in numbers."

"I don't connect with the Force the way that Ben and Luke do so their technology won't affect my powers. I could go alone to a site while you and Luke search---"

"No way will I let a laboring pregnant woman out there alone. Both Ben and Luke would kill me and I would deserve it!"

"Fine, Hux. We could team up and Luke could go with the security team to another site. Then we would only have one or two other places to search. If you're agreeable, we need to get moving now!!


	55. The One I Could Lose Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kidnappers get desperate. Natalie and Ben deliver their baby, but something goes wrong.

"Thomas, we're fucked!! How are we supposed to get off the planet now? We can't stay here forever! Kylo Ren was right! We are all going to prison!" 

"He's right, Thomas! We need to get moving. They will find us eventually. We barely have enough supplies for us let alone a prisoner."

Thomas considered Ned and Petyr's arguments. He'd come so far. Hux and his provisional government cronies were probably questioning Iliana now. He may have doomed her to prison as well. Was it all worth it? He did want revenge against Kylo Ren, but he had the chance to be happy with Iliana and now that was probably ruined. His best friends who he had pulled into this had experienced some loss, but nothing like he had. They were about to lose the lives they had remade as well. At this point, he had to consider an unconventional tact.

Thomas went back to talk to Kylo. Ben heard footsteps on the way back toward him. "Come to finish what you started?"

"I need your help, Kylo."

"Why would you want my help?"

"You were right. When we're caught with you, we will be imprisoned and our lives will be over. I have a proposition for you if you're willing to listen."

"I'm listening."

"The way I see it you owe me, owe us for what the First Order did to our families. Our original plan has gone to shit, but if you use your Force powers to help us then we can escape from here and you can go back to your life with your family."

"How do I know you won't try to come after me or my family again?"

"I've lost my taste for it if I'm honest. I've wanted revenge for so long, but then I met Iliana. I want to spend the rest of my life with her and probably screwed that up. I miss my family, but they're dead and I'm alive to try to make the most of my life. I can't forgive you for what you did, but I can get you to get me back the life I want. Can I trust you if I take the suppression collar off?"

Ben missed his Force connection so much, but he knew if he was connected to the Force again they'd be found instantly. "If we can get as close to the airfield in your vehicle as possible, you can take off the collar and I can get you on a transport off the planet."

"So you want me to wait until we're at the airfield before I take off the collar? Why?"

"My wife and uncle will find me as soon as the collar comes off. If we wait until we're at the airfield, that will give you more time to escape."

"Why are you helping us?"

"Because you're right, I've done a lot of unforgiveable things. I do owe you and a lot of other people."

________________________________________________________________________________

 

Natalie and Hux found a cave where there were signs of recent activity. This was probably the cave were they were keeping Ben, but where are they now? They took a brief look through the cave and found more blood. Hux saw Natalie wince in pain as she stroked her pregnant belly and tried to calm her breathing. "We should really get you to the med bay. This could take longer than anticipated."

"Not until I find Ben!" 

They exited the cave together and Hux noticed the directions of the vehicle tracks. 

"I think they're gonna try to make it to the airfield."

"That's practically suicide, a really bad tactic! Unless they have help that we weren't expecting. Ben's gonna help them escape. However they are subduing him and disconnecting him from the Force, they won't stop using it until they get to the airfield. He knows that as soon as he is connected to the Force that Luke and I will find him."

"Why would he help them?"

"Guilt. He wants to try to make up for some of the things he's done."

"How do you know this without the Force connection?"

"I know Ben better than anyone ever has or will. Hux, get me to the airfield as soon as possible please so he can be there when I have our baby! My water just broke!!"

________________________________________________________________________________

Thomas, Ned, Petyr, and Ben made it to an area a very short distance from the airfield. Thomas went to disconnect the Force suppression collar from Ben's neck.

Petyr put his hand on Thomas' hand as he was about to put the key in the lock. "Are you sure about this, Thomas? That we can trust him?"

"This is our only chance to get out of this. We have to risk it." Thomas twisted the key and the collar came off. The Force came flooding back into Ben and he was immediately comforted. He could feel the presence of his bonds with Luke and Nat. They had to hurry to get to the transport. 

"We need to go now, Thomas!," Ben said.

They all exited the vehicle and ran toward the airfield. Ben monitored the guards. Thomas pointed out their ship to Ben. "Stay close to me.," Ben told the 3 men. Ben kept his hand raised so he could be ready to use his powers quickly. They went along the path to their ship with haste as Ben used the Force to steal the guards' consciousness. Ben could sense that Nat and Luke were on their way to his location. He could also sense that Nat was in a lot more distress than normal. Thomas, Ned, and Petyr got on their ship and started to power it up. Ben kept a look out for other guards. 

"Kylo, I need something else from you."

"I haven't been Kylo Ren in a long time. My real name is Ben. You need me to get Iliana out of here."

"Yes. Tell her to meet me in our favorite place. She'll know what you mean."

"I will. I'm sorry, Thomas."

"Your sorry doesn't mean much, but your help did and does. Thank you, Ben."

As their ship lifted off the ground, Luke, Hux, Nat, and the security team showed up. Ben made a beeline for Nat. He was a bloody mess, but he thought he'd never see her again. He knew something was wrong and he took her in his arms. 

"Ben, we're about to have this baby! My water just broke! We need to get on your ship!"

Ben picked Nat up in his arms, grimacing in pain from his ribs and nose, and made his way to his ship. He placed her on the bed once he got the ship opened up. Hux got on the com to alert the medical bay of Natalie's impending delivery so they could send a medical team on the way to get her back there while the security team secured the airfield. Luke stayed near the ship in case Ben needed help. 

"Baby, I should really clean up a bit. I don't want to bleed all over you and the baby."

"It's ok. We've got some time. Go clean up."

Ben went to the refresher and took out his first aid kit with shaky hands. He just went from thinking he was gonna die without the Force, helping his kidnappers, and now he was about to deliver his 3rd child with his own hands. He went about cleaning his wounds, placing bacta patches on them and his nose and ribs hastily. Nat needed him so he could save his crazy thoughts for later. He returned to Nat and quickly kissed her before he went to remove her underwear. 

"Holy shit!," Ben exclaimed as he saw the baby's head crowning. 

"Ben, I'm gonna try to talk you through this as much as I can, but this really hurts. Do you need Luke in here?"

"It might be helpful. He could probably hold your hand through this."

"Ok, get some clean towels or sheets, something sharp, some rubber gloves, and a nasal syringe out here and call Luke in. I'll just wait here!"

At least her sense of humor was still intact. Ben projected to Luke to come on to the ship. 

"Luke, you have to hurry. I feel like I need to push. Ben, you need to get down there so you can catch the baby." Luke took his place at Natalie's right side and took her hand. She squeezed so hard when she pushed that he thought his cybernetic hand might break. 

"Ben, did the baby move out further?," Natalie said as she breathed heavily.

"Just a little, baby. You're doing fine. Push again when you're ready."

It wasn't long before Natalie pushed again. "The baby's head is out, Nat."

"Ok, Ben. I need you to take the nasal syringe and suction out the baby's nose and mouth so that when the chest comes out the baby doesn't inhale the amniotic fluid. Let me know when you're done, so I can push again."

Ben followed Nat's instructions. "I'm done, baby. Push when you're ready."

Natalie pushed again and the baby's chest came out followed by it's legs. The baby let out a healthy cry.

"It's a girl, baby! She's so beautiful!"

Natalie was exhausted, but she had more instructions to give. "I need you to tie off the umbilical cord as close to the baby's skin as possible and cut it with your sharp instrument. Then put her on my chest and go back down to look out for delivery of the placenta."

Ben followed her instructions to the letter. When the baby was laid on Nat's chest, she quieted her crying. Natalie took a few deep breaths and looked at Luke with frightened eyes. "Take the baby, take the baby, something's wrong!," Natalie said as Luke picked up the baby before she passed out. Ben could see that blood started to ooze from Nat's vagina. Ben ran out of the ship to make sure the medical team was on the way. The team was there and they gathered up Natalie, Ben, and the baby to transport them back to the med bay. Ben gave them a report on the delivery and based on his report they got the operating room ready with units of blood on standby. They made it back to the medical bay in minutes and Nat was rushed to surgery. The medics had checked the baby out on the way there and let Ben walk the baby back to the nursery so they could clean and feed her. He stayed with the baby the whole time after they gave them matching bracelets. His mind was all over the place. He was still reeling from his kidnapping, being reunited with Nat, delivering their baby, and feeling like he was losing Nat again. He was exhausted and he could fall asleep right now, but Nat and the baby needed him. Luke made his way to the nursery. 

"Ben, are you ok?"

"I'll be fine as long as Nat and the baby are." Just then the surgeon came by to speak with Ben.

"Mr. Solo, I'm operating on your wife. She is losing a lot of blood. We have units on hand to give her. I need to ask you if saving her uterus is a priority. Unfortunately, the placenta got to deeply attached to her uterus during the pregnancy. That is what's causing the bleeding. A C-section would have been a better way to deliver the baby, but that's not what happened. If you don't plan on having more children, we should take out her uterus now. It could save her life. We can leave the ovaries behind to maintain her hormones."

"Do what you need to do to save her life, please!"

"Mr. Solo, I'll be back to update you once were done with the surgery."

"Ben, you should get some rest. I can watch over the baby. You need some medical attention yourself."

"Thank you, uncle. For everything." Ben made his way to the med bay for treatment. Hux came by to check on him. 

"Are you alright, Ben?"

"I'll be fine. Nat's in surgery." Tears came to Ben's eyes. "They have to remove her uterus to save her life. She's bleeding a lot. I can't lose her again, Hux."

"She's stubborn as hell, Ben. I know she'll pull through. She was in labor practically the entire time we were looking for you. I tried to get her to come to the med bay, but she threatened to mind wipe me if I told Luke anything." Both Ben and Hux laughed.

"That sounds like her."

"She loves you like no one will ever love you, Ben. If you ever hurt her, you'll have me to deal with."

"Hux, if I ever hurt her, she'd deal with me first. I don't think she'd leave anything for you."

"I've prepared some quarters and clothes for you. Get some rest. I'll alert you personally when there's news on Natalie."

"Thank you, Hux."

Ben got to his quarters to shower and get to bed. He knew that his friends and family were watching out for him so he could be ready to take care of Nat when she got out of surgery. He fell asleep nearly immediately.


	56. The One Who's Going Crazy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben keeps a promise. Ben gives the official side to his story. Natalie has some postpartum issues.

Natalie made it out of surgery and recovery within 5 hours then they put her in a hospital room. The doctor told Ben that everything went well, but they still needed to watch her closely. She still wouldn't wake up for another hour or so. Ben went to visit the baby and Luke was still there. Ben went back to the nursery to feed and change the baby. She looked more like Nat than him. Ben hadn't given the staff the baby's name yet. He wanted to wait for Nat to wake up and feel better before they did that together. Ben still felt like hell and could probably do with a couple hours sleep. He had the staff put a bracelet on Luke so he could watch over the baby for him again while he rested some more. He asked Hux to get him up in a few hours. 

When Ben woke up again, he was a little more rested. Hux let him know that Natalie was awake and Luke was visiting her with the baby. Hux followed Ben to Natalie's hospital room. When Ben saw Natalie, tears came to both of their eyes and he walked toward her to bend down and kiss her. He grabbed her face gently and kissed her softly at first. When he felt she could handle it, he kissed her more deeply. Luke and Hux looked at each other. "I'm gonna take the baby back to the nursery, but I'll visit you both later.," Luke said. "I've got so much paperwork to do so I'll come back another time. " It was a little while before Ben and Natalie realized they were alone. Ben pulled a chair up to the side of Natalie's hospital bed and grabbed her hand gently. "I was scared I was gonna lose you, Nat."

"I was scared I was gonna lose you, Ben. You helped them escape."

Ben nodded his head. "I don't wanna talk about that. It's over and done with. You know I told them to take out your uterus to save you, right?"

"Yes, I'm not upset about it. I'm too old for any more babies, honey. You made the right choice. Are you ok? You got kidnapped, beaten up, and delivered our baby in a 24hr period. We've both been through the ringer. Why does this keep happening to us?" They both had to laugh at that question.

"I think it keeps happening because we can handle it. The Force has gifted us with these powers and it's a heavy responsibility. Together we can bear it so we can help people. The galaxy needs us. The Force also gifted us with each other and our children. Our children can take up the mantle of responsibility that we have now so we can grow old together. "

"Wow, look at you, Ben Solo! You've become an old married father. You're so much more mature than when I first met you."

Ben laughed. "One of the best days of my life when I met you, baby. The other best days were when the kids were born. Speaking of that, we need to name our new baby girl. "

"We talked over some names before. I like Isabella Andrea Solo. We could call her Izzie, Bella or Andie as a nickname. What do you think, Ben?"

"I like it. She's gonna be gorgeous just like you. I'm gonna have my hands full keeping the boys away from both of my beautiful daughters. I might have to team up with Xander to get the job done." Ben's eyes filled with tears and he smiled with quivering lips. "I love you, Mrs. Solo."

"I love you, Mr. Solo.," Natalie said with teary tired eyes.

"I'm gonna let you rest, baby. Me and Isabella will come and see you in the morning, ok?"

"Ok, kiss me before you go."

"Absolutely, Mrs. Solo." Ben placed a soft kiss on her lips and on her brow before he left her for the night. 

Ben made his way back to his quarters to sleep. He was drained, but looking forward to seeing Nat and Isabella in the morning. He sat on his bed and laid down with his clothes on before falling asleep in minutes.

 

__________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben awoke well rested, but sore from his beating. The shower helped with the pain. He grabbed some breakfast with Hux and Luke before going to the nursery to pickup Isabella so they could see Nat. When they got to Nat's room, Ben could tell she was still tired and in a lot of pain. She pushed through it so she could spend some time with her new daughter and her husband. Ben gave Nat the baby to hold and feed so they could get some more bonding time. When Isabella was done with her feeding, Ben put her back in the crib. The doctor came by to see Nat and check on her incision. The doctor was frank about the healing taking a total of 6 to 8 weeks and expected Nat to have pain for some time. "I also need to discuss another subject with you both. Natalie, you're at a high risk for postpartum depression, but also menopausal now. Have you been experiencing any mood swings, crying spells, hot flashes or night sweats, insomnia, or any suicidal tendencies at all?"

"I have been a little more moody and teary. I haven't been sleeping well. Come to think of it, I have been sweating a little more. No suicidal tendencies at all." Ben was listening intently.

"Well, we might want to consider some antidepressants, although I have to admit I'm not sure how that would affect a Force user like yourself. I will, however, insist that you both meet with a counselor before we discharge you so we can be able to meet your needs and get ahead of any problems that could come about. I'll leave you all be now. Please feel free to call on me if you need anything. I'll be back to check on you tomorrow."

After the doctor left, Ben focused on Natalie. "If you're tired, baby, me and Isabella can leave so you can get some sleep."

"I'd really love it if you could get in bed with me and give me one of your famous massages, but I know we both can't fit in the bed so that will have to wait. I'll try to go to sleep on my own for now. Can you bring Isabella back at dinner time?"

"Of course, anything for you. I'll talk to the staff and see if we can get a bigger bed in here so we can stay in here together, ok?"

"Ok, I love you, Ben."

"I love you too, Nat." Ben kissed her quickly before leaving to get Isabella back to the nursery. He asked Hux to arrange for a bigger bed in Nat's hospital room. He had an errand to run now so he could completely focus on getting Nat through her recovery and taking care of Isabella. He had a promise to keep. 

Iliana was still essentially on house arrest. Ben cloaked himself in the Force to enter Iliana's quarters. He revealed himself to her and she was taken aback. "Ben, what are you doing here?"

"Thomas wanted me to deliver a message to you. He said you need to meet him in "our favorite place." He said you'd know what he was talking about. I'll do whatever I can to help you. Good luck to you, Iliana."

"Ben, tell Natalie I'm sorry for any trouble that all of this caused. I truly hope that you two can be happy."

Ben nodded. "Thank you." With that, Ben cloaked himself in the Force and he returned to the main complex. He sought Hux out to give him a report on what happened to him. 

"Ben, you don't have to do this now. You need to be with Natalie and the baby. This can wait."

"I just want to get this over with so I can focus on them. Can we get started?"

"Alright. Give me your account of what happened, Ben."

"I was out for an early morning run and I fell and hit my head. 3 men came along and helped me to the cave. They needed help to get to their ship, but the airfield was locked down. So I used the Force to allow them to get to their ship and leave the planet."

"What about your ribs? I saw those bruises, Ben. Are you telling me that happened from a fall?"

"Well, they dropped me when they tried to get me to their vehicle. I'm pretty heavy if you recall."

"This story is a bit ridiculous and quite unbelievable."

"Well, only me and those 3 men know what really happened so I guess you'll have to take me at my word."

"Ok, I will. Anything else you would like to share, Ben?"

"Off the record, you and I have come a long way in our lives, Hux. We've done a lot of horrible things to a lot of people. We've been blessed with a second chance and I plan on making the most of it. I hope you do too."

"I agree and I will, Ben. Thank you for coming down to give your report. Tell Natalie I'll be by to visit as soon as I can. The bed will be delivered later today. It might be a good time to get your wife some fresh air." Ben and Hux shook hands and Ben left to check on Isabella. She seemed to have an easier temperament than her siblings when they were born. He would have thought that meant she got her temperament from Nat, but he rethought that on the way to see Nat cause he could sense that her mind was in turmoil. He heard what sounded like a tray hitting the wall and some yelling. He didn't have a good feeling about this. The nurse came running out in fear. When Ben poked his head in the door, he was nearly hit in the head with a flying plate. "Baby, it's me! Stop throwing things at me!!"

"Ben, I'm sorry. I'm going crazy. I haven't slept in days. Everything hurts. The food is awful like they're trying to poison me." Ben bristled at that last line due to the memories from when Nat was sick. Nat didn't remember the things she said at that time, but it stayed with Ben. "I can't stop crying about anything and nothing. I'm constantly sweating. I'm never gonna get this weight off. I'm constipated. Everything is just wrong."

Ben moved toward his wife carefully to extend his arms and hug her to try comforting her. Nat let him put his arms around her and cried into his neck while he stroked her hair. "Baby, you're gonna be fine. I promise. Hux said they're gonna bring in the bed soon so let's get you out of here for some fresh air."

"Is Bella ok?"

"She's fine. I just checked on her. Come on. Let's get you in a wheelchair." Ben lifted Natalie into his arms and placed her in the wheelchair.

" I look horrible!"

"Baby, you look fine. We can try to find you some food that you like. If you don't want to ride around the complex then we can go to my quarters and order you something."

"Can we just get in your bed so you can give me a massage? I might be lucky enough to fall asleep."

"Ok, whatever you need."

"Thank you, Ben." She was visibly more relaxed and stayed that way on the way to Ben's quarters. Once there, Ben pushed the wheelchair into the room and lifted Natalie up so they could lay in his bed. Ben moved himself behind Natalie to do her massage and he had to focus so he didn't get hard. He was the king of inappropriate boners and it probably wouldn't help Nat's situation. Being this close to her even with her postpartum issues, he always wanted her. Ben started at her neck and worked his way down to her low back. Ben noticed that she was quiet and her breathing had slowed. She was asleep. He lightly kissed her neck and hair. Maybe instead of him moving into her room, she should stay with him in his quarters. She'd do much better and the staff would probably appreciate it. Ben sent a com to Hux to float the idea and Hux said he could make it happen as long as the nursing and medical staff could come and check on her here. Ben got back in position behind Nat and carefully wrapped his arms around her avoiding her incision. He fell asleep almost immediately.


	57. The One Who Is Always There For Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie goes home, but still has a hard time. Anakin makes another appearance. Leia has a hard time. Ben and Natalie experiment and make future plans.

2 weeks passed by quickly and Nat's emotional state improved quite a bit. They met with the counselor as the doctor ordered and she didn't feel the need to meet with them again unless things changed. The doctor cleared her to start working out again in 2 weeks and that made Nat very happy. Iliana had been released a week earlier as Hux had no reason to continue holding her. She left on her ship alone leaving the rest of the minority group members who wanted to participate in the provisional government to fend for themselves. The meeting went off without a hitch and there was no need for Natalie to continue to come, but she would if requested. Ben and Natalie said their goodbyes to Luke, Hux, Poe, and others before they boarded Ben's ship with Isabella in tow. They hadn't seen Xander and Lexi in weeks. Leia didn't mind the extra time with her grandchildren and they couldn't wait to meet Isabella. 

When the ship landed near Leia's home, everyone was waiting for them. Leia immediately confiscated Isabella for safekeeping while Ben and Natalie reintroduced themselves to Xander and Lexi. They didn't realize how much they missed their twins and it seemed they had grown since being gone. Ben cooked and Natalie baked so they could give Leia a bit of a break. Xander and Lexi were fascinated by their little sister and were on their way to becoming a very protective big brother and sister. Nat tried to jump back into full time parenting with both feet, but she was still trying to manage her emotions so Ben had to pick up the slack. He didn't mind because he knew she still needed some rest. After dinner, Natalie went right to bed after a shower while Ben managed to get the twins to clean up their messes and then to bed. Leia took care of feeding and changing Isabella and then she put her to sleep.

"I can't thank you enough, Mom, for watching the kids for us. I hope they weren't too much trouble."

"They are no trouble at all, Ben. As a grandmother, my job is to spoil them rotten and make sure they don't get hurt. I did well at both of those things. How's Natalie? I can tell she's having a rough time."

"Some postpartum depression, but I think she'll get over it. She does a lot better when she can get some sleep. We'll be fine."

"Ben, I felt it when you were disconnected from the Force. Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, it's done with. I'm just focused on being a good son, good husband and good father now. Mom, I'm wiped out. Do you need anything?"

"No, Ben. You go to bed. You need rest too. I love you. Goodnight."

"I love you too, Mom. Goodnight."

Ben made his way to his and Nat's bedroom. He took a quick shower before joining her in bed. He knew she was asleep, but he could sense her restlessness. He got in bed behind her and gently massaged her hoping it would end her restlessness. "Ben, you ok?"

"I'm fine, baby. I was trying to make your sleep a little better, not trying to wake you. I can put you back to sleep if you want."

"You don't have to try so hard not to get hard, Ben." Natalie turned toward him. "It won't upset me. I'm used to it." She kissed him deeply. Ben immediately got hard and Natalie reached down to stroke his dick. Ben slowly thrusted into her hand. He moved his mouth to her neck to lightly nip and lick at it. He was careful not to get carried away. He knew it would be another 4 to 6 weeks before they could have intercourse. Natalie kissed Ben's neck and moved down to his nipples. They hardened under her touch and she licked at the hard nubs. Ben increased his thrusting rhythm and Natalie met his rhythm with her hand. She reached her other hand down to play with his balls. After a few more thrusts, Ben came with a muffled moan that Natalie stifled with a deep kiss. "I love you so much, Nat.," Ben murmured against her lips.

"I love you too. Let's get cleaned up and I'll let you get back to your massage." Ben grabbed a washcloth to clean himself up and Nat washed her hands. They met each other back in bed. Ben assumed the position to give Nat her massage. Her mind was all over the place. "Baby, please talk to me. What's bothering you?"

"Just feeling overwhelmed. Ben, we have 3 kids now! That's so crazy. I love them so much. I just need to be enough for them, for you. I'm so tired all the time now. I just need to get back to myself." Ben wrapped his arms around her and kissed her hair as she started to weep.

"Hey, it's ok! You're gonna be fine. We're gonna be fine. You just need some time. Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere. You know that, don't you?" Ben moved in front of her again to look in Natalie's face as she seemed to hesitate. "Please tell me you know that I'm not leaving you and the kids!," Ben said as he searched her face and saw the smallest doubt.

"When I saw Thomas and his friends on my morning run, my first instinct was to chat with them. I didn't see them as a danger because I'm not the same anymore because you changed me. Kylo Ren would have seen them as a danger and killed them without any regrets. When they got me to the cave and they had the Force suppression collar on me, I knew I had to get myself out, but as soon as they even suggested that they could come after you, I knew I had to stay and suffer any punishment they wanted to give me so I could keep you and the baby safe. They realized pretty quickly that they needed my help so when they asked I gave it because you would have wanted me to. So you see, Nat, I can never leave you because you and those children are the reason I do everything in my life. I don't even have to give it a thought. My default is to always think of you and the kids first. Tell me you know that I love you."

"I do know, Ben. The doubt that you sense is because of me, not you. I…just feel broken. I don't know how else I can describe it. I question absolutely everything about myself now. I know I'm not the same person I was when I met you and that's not the problem. The problem is that I don't know who that person is now and when I finally do figure it out, will that be someone you could still love and who can be the mother to our children? That is what I'm afraid of. I'm right back where I was when fear ruled my life and it's hard--"

Ben silenced her with a long deep kiss and a stroke of her hair. After he broke away from their kiss, Ben leaned to touch his forehead to Nat's. "Do you trust me, Nat?"

"I trust no one more, Ben."

"Then trust me to support you when you need it. And if you don't know you need it, I'll still support you, ok?"

"Ok."

"Alright, we're going to bed. I'm gonna get back to your massage and you'll go to sleep. Then I'll be right behind you." Ben went about massaging Natalie's neck, shoulders, and back. He sprinkled in light kisses as he went. Ben could feel her muscles relax under his hands and hear her breathing slow until she fell asleep. He wrapped his arms around her and fell asleep soon after. 

________________________________________________________________________________

 

When Ben awoke, Natalie had already gotten dressed, cooked breakfast, and fed all the kids. He left their bedroom after showering and dressing to find Xander and Lexi playing quietly while Leia was putting Bella back down to sleep after changing her. He knew Nat was meditating because her mind was quiet and focused. It made him feel good that she was better for the moment. 

"The kids are fine right now, Ben, if you want to try to meditate as well."

"Yea, I will. Thanks, Mom."

Ben found a quiet place in his mom's home to meditate, but he could feel something beckoning him to the field behind his mother's home. He made his way out to the area to find blue tinged ghostly figure of a young man with shoulder length hair and a vertical scar on his right eye. "Grandfather?"

"Yes, Ben. I'm sorry it took so long for us to meet. You've become a wonderful husband and father, Ben. I'm very proud of you."

"Thank you. I wished for so long to see you and talk to you. Why are you here now?"

"Ben, you and Natalie are the parents to three of the most powerful Force users that have ever been because of their lineage. You need to make sure they aren't unduly influenced. I'm sorry for what Snoke did to you and I wish I had been able to save you."

"Grandfather, I promise I will do everything I can to keep them safe and I have no doubt that Nat will do the same. What else can we do?"

"He wants us to start training Lexi and Xander." Both Ben and Anakin's Force ghost turned Natalie as she walked toward them. "It's good to see you again, Anakin."

"Good to see you as well, Natalie. I'm sure you've both noticed that your twins are very close even at their young age. Their bond is very strong with each other, but it is also very strong with your new child. They are all destined to have great power. They need guidance in how to use it. "

"Grandfather, I can appreciate what you're saying, but I don't want their lives to be mapped out for them before they figure out who they are."

"I agree with Ben. I think we can come to a happy medium between us. We appreciate you coming to talk with us."

"May the Force be with you both and your family." With that, Anakin faded away. 

"Are you ok, Ben?"

"Honestly, Nat. I wanted nothing more than to hear from my grandfather for a really long time. I know Snoke blocked him from me. He finally shows up to talk to me and he wants to tell me how to raise my family. He really fucking pissed me off! How dare he tell me what to do now!"

"I think he was trying to be helpful, but I think we can handle this together. I want our kids to have as normal a life as possible. I know you want the same. We can make this work. Come on, why don't you meditate for awhile and we can talk about it later."

Ben took her advice and he meditated for a few hours. He needed to calm himself before he saw the kids and Leia again. By the time, he came out of his meditation, he smelled some of Nat's baking presumably for lunch or dinner. He went into the kitchen to find Nat and Leia talking while the kids were down for a nap. "How was your meditation, baby?," Natalie said as she went over to kiss Ben hello. "It was good. What are you ladies up to?"

"Baking our dinner and talking about you when you were a baby, son."

"Really, mom?"

"It's fine, Ben. I'm just happy to have you and your family here. You've become such a good man. I just wish that…." Tears welled up in Leia's eyes and she went outside. 

"Ben, you have to go talk to her."

"What can I say? I killed her husband, my father. I can't ever make up for that!"

"Sorry is not gonna help, but maybe there's something else you can do that will. You won't know until you talk with her."

Ben went outside to talk with his mother. She was weeping and he went to try to comfort her. "What can I do to help you, mom?"

"I just want to keep you close. You, Natalie, and the kids will be leaving in a few weeks and I'll be alone again."

"We'll come and visit as often as we can. I'm sure Hux and Luke would like it if you came to work with them on the provisional government."

"I've had enough of politics and war, Ben."

"This is gonna sound weird coming from me, but have you thought about dating anyone, mom?"

"Can you imagine me dating? I don't think I could marry anyone again. I wouldn't mind a fuck buddy---"

Ben frowned up his face. "Eww! Gross, mom! Virgin ears!"

"Oh please, Ben! You have three children. Obviously, you're familiar with sex!"

"That doesn't mean I want to talk about my mother's sex life! If you want to talk to someone about that, Nat or even Luke could help you."

"Maybe I could come visit you in Natalie's home for awhile? You'd have a temporary live in babysitter. You and Natalie could spend more time alone together."

"I'll talk to Nat about it. Won't you miss Luke?"

"Luke is tied up with the provisional government right now and when that's over, he'll probably travel with Wedge for awhile."

"Alright, I'll talk to Nat. I love you, mom. I'll do anything I can to make you happy."

"I know, Ben. I feel the same."

_______________________________________________________________________________

Nat agreed to have Leia come home with them for a bit to visit, but was hesitant to commit to anything long term. In a few weeks, Nat started working out. Between her workouts and her meditation, she was starting to feel a lot more like her usual self. She and Ben decided to stay the extra time so that she would hopefully be cleared for sex. Ben was being very patient and he could wait longer, but he wouldn't complain if she were cleared earlier. 

When the time came for Nat's follow up appointment with her surgeon, she and Ben took the trip back in his ship to the provisional government complex while Leia and Chewie watched the children. They had already decided to travel back to their home after this visit whether she was cleared or not. 

Ben went to talk with Luke, Hux, and Poe while Nat was at her doctor's appointment. The provisional government council was about to take their final vote to become a permanent entity and all indications were that everything would be finalized by the end of the month. When that happened, Luke planned to step away from his current role and transition to a consultant. Poe would then take over for him. Hux would stay on as the head administrator. They all wanted Natalie to maintain her consultant role as well. On a personal level, things were going well for everyone. Luke and Wedge did go ahead with their plans to adopt a child and they were planning to travel to help people and expose their child to different experiences. Hux and Poe were engaged, but knew they probably wouldn't marry anytime soon due to the goings on with the new government. Rey and Finn planned to help the new government after they finished spending some time with Finn's family who they found after the First Order's records on the Stormtroopers' beginnings were released to the public. 

"Is there room for one more at this party?," Natalie said as she entered the conference room and they all looked in her direction.

Natalie hugged Luke, Hux, and Poe hello before taking her place next to Ben and quickly kissing him.

"What did I miss?" 

"Not much. I hear Leia is going to be staying with you two and the kids for a while. I know she'll love that. She never did well with idle hands.," Luke said.

"We just hope that us and the kids won't send her back here screaming and never wanting to see us again.," Ben said.

"No, I'm sure that won't happen. She's the happiest she's been in a long time."

"So, you guys think you're gonna be able to get this government thing off the ground without me?"

"We appreciate the help, Natalie, but you can go back to your lives for now. Trust us, we'll call on you if we need you again.," Hux said.

They had a farewell dinner and caught Natalie up on everyone's lives. The dinner went for a few hours likely because this would be the last time they would see each other for a while. At the end, everyone hugged and wished each other well.

After they got back to Ben's ship, he finished the preflight checks, escaped the planet's atmosphere, and set the ship on autopilot before he went back to the bedroom to join Nat. "So what's the verdict? Am I clear to start jumping your bones, Mrs. Solo?," Ben said with a smile as he wrapped his arms around his wife. 

"Well, he said everything healed up just fine, but during the exam, I was still a little tender so he said if I wanted to be safer, we should wait 2 more weeks. Or if we can't wait, we could just use lots of lube.," Natalie said as she kissed Ben softly.

"No, we're waiting. I want you to be ready for me. Plus that gives me some time to plan some things for you."

"Are you sure? You've already waited so long, Ben."

"It's not long. What was long was the length of time that passed for me before I found you."

"That was long. Ok, should I even ask what you're planning for us?"

"Nope, it's a surprise. You'll just have to wait, Mrs. Solo."

"I can wait, but have a seat on the bed for me, Ben." He did as she asked as she moved to stand in front of him.

"Take off your clothes slowly and sit down on the bed when you're done." Ben complied.

"You're not hard yet. Do you need me to help you get hard?," Natalie whispered in his ear and grabbed the hair at his nape, then she licked and bit at his ear lobe. Ben's eyes blew wide with lust and he immediately got hard.

"Touch yourself with your left hand." Ben tried to jerk himself off with his left hand.

"No! I said touch yourself, not jerk off! If you can't follow instructions, I'll have to punish you, Ben!," Natalie said as she grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her in the eyes. Ben got impossibly harder. "I'm sorry! I'll be good!"

"When was the last time you jerked off, Ben?"

"The night we met."

"You never told me that before. How come?"

"I was ashamed."

"Why? Were you thinking of someone else?"

"No, you are the only person I ever jerked off to."

"Then why were you ashamed?"

"Because I couldn't help myself. I should have had better self control. I hadn't gotten to know you yet. It felt wrong somehow."

"If it felt wrong, then why did you do it?"

"Because I needed to feel close to you and I didn't know if you would ever care for me."

"I want you to jerk off right now, Ben. Slowly with your left hand. Use the lotion on the bed stand. Tell me when you're close." Ben obliged her. " Are you ashamed for me to watch you do it?"

"No, I've thought about it before." 

"What happened when you thought about it? What was I doing while you were jerking off?"

"I was watching you masturbate." 

"You've never asked for me to do that before. How come?"

"Because I always want to be with you in whatever way I can. I don't have a preference."

Natalie licked her lips while looking into Ben's eyes and she moved to whisper in his ear. "Would you like for me to masturbate in front of you now, Ben?"

"Yes, please." Natalie got undressed slowly while Ben continued to slowly jerk himself off. When she was naked, she laid on the bed with her head elevated by the pillows. She spread her legs open in front of Ben. She brought her hand down to her vagina and used her index finger to stroke her clit. She held Ben's gaze through it all. "Baby, I'm close. Can I please come?"

"Not yet, Ben. Is this how you imagined it?"

"I want to come on you, please."

"Ben, you're so nasty! But I like it! Where do you want to come on me?"

"On your chest and stomach, please."

"I'll let you come on me, if you clean it up with your mouth, Ben. Is that ok with you?"

"Yes, baby, can I please come?"

"Yes, you can come on me, baby!" Ben came with a grunt and shot his load on Natalie's chest and stomach while Natalie came with a loud cry. While Natalie was coming down from her orgasm, Ben went to work cleaning her chest and stomach with his mouth. Natalie purred from the sensation of Ben's mouth on her skin. When Ben was finished, he kissed Natalie deeply and passionately. After a few minutes, Natalie spoke. "You know, if there's things you want to do, you can tell me, Ben. You might be surprised at what I'm willing to try."

"Baby, you know I'm a sick bastard. You might regret telling me that."

"No, I won't. I love you. I accepted everything about you a long time ago, Ben. Even the things you weren't ready to accept about yourself."

"You know the more you talk the deeper I fall in love with you."

"That's convenient since we're already married with 3 children.," Natalie said as she smiled. 

"We've got some time if you're willing to experiment with me. We don't have to do anything you don't want to, Nat."

"Let's do it."


	58. The One Who Tries to Fix Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Chewie hug it out. Ben and Natalie bring Leia home with them. Natalie discovers Leia's secret. Natalie needs an old friend and an old nemesis to help Leia. Natalie gives Ben a private performance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the length of time between updates. I really think I'm close to the end this time. If you're still with me, please give me some feedback!!

Ben and Natalie showered and cleaned up the ship so it would be ready for their trip back to their home. When they made it back to Leia's home, she, Chewie, and the kids were waiting for them. Natalie and Leia gathered up the kids and got them to the ship while Chewie and Ben talked. They hadn't really had in depth conversations since Han died. Chewie said to Ben in Shyriiwook "Your father would have been proud of you, Ben. You have a wonderful family and you're a good husband. I will never forget what you did to Han, but I forgive you because Han would want it that way. If you ever need anything, I will be there for you. Take good care of your mother." 

"Thank you, Chewie. I will take care of mom. If you ever need anything of me, you shall have it." Chewie gave Ben a bear hug and lifted him off the ground before they bid each other goodbye.

Ben grabbed the last bit of things they needed for the trip and brought them to the ship where Leia, Natalie, and the kids were waiting for him. After he refueled and did his preflight checks, they left the planet's atmosphere and he set the autopilot. He brought the twins up to the cockpit with him to show them some things about the ship. Even though his timing was bad and he was upset by his visitation, he knew Anakin was right. They did need to start training Xander and Lexi in the ways of the Force, but for now, he would try to teach them about something he loved, flying. That was when he and Han were at their closest. He didn't know if they would take to it like he did, but he would at least share his love of flying with them.

Leia smiled as she heard Ben talk with the twins about the workings of the ship. They were so curious about everything like he was at their age. Tears came to her eyes as she thought of Han teaching Ben about the Falcon. Natalie knew what Leia was thinking about. "What was Han like, Leia?"

Leia came out of her daze and smiled. "When we first met, I thought he was the most annoying person I'd ever met. I was the princess of Alderaan and many people that met me would defer to me because of that. Not Han. He wasn't afraid to tell me when he thought I was wrong. Sometimes I think he went out of his way to annoy me. At first, I thought he was just a scoundrel and of course, that was an attractive quality. But then I found that he was so much more. We fell in love, but we weren't necessarily ready to have children when we had Ben. We both wanted to continue to live our lives like we wanted to instead of accommodating a child. Ben needed so much from us and we weren't ready to give it. That's how Snoke was able to get close to Ben. By the time, we figured out he needed us, it was too late. I called on Luke to work with Ben and then we lost him after I sent him away. "

"You didn't know. All parents make mistakes. I certainly have. I'm sorry about Han. He sacrificed himself because of his mistakes. Trust me, Ben hasn't forgotten that. He will use his experiences to become the best father he can to our kids."

"I'm so proud of the man he's become and I know that Han would be too.," Natalie could see that Leia was still upset, but not about Han. There was something Leia wanted to hold back about herself, but Natalie figured it out.

"You need to tell Ben that you're sick, Leia."

"I know, but I just want to spend time with family right now."

"Did Luke know?"

"Of course he did, but he knew this would make me happy."

"So you've exhausted all your treatment options then?"

"Yes, that's what the doctors tell me. I may have a year, two at the most."

"You have to know I can't keep this from him. We've been through too much. You need to tell him soon."

"Just give me a day or so and I will tell him everything."

Bella stirred awake with a quiet whine. Natalie went to grab for her. "Please let me.," Leia said as Natalie nodded in agreement. Leia picked Bella up to comfort her while Natalie gathered a bottle, a diapers, and some wipes. 

"I'll tell you what, Leia. When we get back to my home, why don't you let me see if there are other treatment options for you? Whatever we find out, we can tell Ben after."

"Ok, that sounds reasonable.," Leia said as she proceeded to start feeding Bella.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Once Ben, Natalie, Leia, and the kids made it back to Seattle and got settled, Natalie called Twitch to start working on some options for Leia.

"Nat, I have a suggestion, but you're not gonna like it."

"Twitch, this is for my mother in law and whatever it is, I can handle it."

"Dr. Pearce could probably put you in contact with the best in cancer treatment. He's participating in a bunch of studies right now and he is in constant contact with the foremost experts on cancers in other disciplines."

"I am ok with talking to and dealing with Neal. I can't speak for Ben, though. I think even he would agree if his mom was taken care of. I'll call him and set something up for tomorrow. I'd appreciate it if you went with me and Ben's mom so we can explore her options. I don't want to talk to Ben about it until we see what's open to her."

"Ok, I'll clear my schedule. Text me with the time and place for the meeting. I'll see you tomorrow, love."

"Bye, Twitch and thank you.," Natalie hung up and dialed Dr. Pearce's office. 

"Dr. Pearce's office, Robin speaking."

"Robin, hi, this is Natalie Granderson."

"Natalie, hi, you sound wonderful. We thought--"

"I know, I need to speak with Neal. Is he in?"

"Yes, he'll want to speak with you right away. Hold please."

Natalie held for about a minute before Neal picked up. "Natalie, I thought you were dead. How are you still--"

"Neal, I know this is amazing to you, but we'll have to address that at another time. You once promised me that you would do whatever I needed if it was within your power. I need to collect on that for someone. Can we meet in your office tomorrow please?"

"Yes, may I ask who I'm helping for you?"

"We can talk about it tomorrow, Neal. Is 11am ok?"

"Yes, Natalie. It's good to hear from you. Goodbye." Natalie texted Twitch with the time and place for their meeting. 

Natalie made her way back out to the living room. Ben was working on dinner in the kitchen, Leia was getting settled in her room, Bella was asleep in Ben and Natalie's room, and the twins were watching a cartoon. 

"Do you need help with anything, baby?"

"No, Nat. If you want you can try to nap before dinner."

"I'm ok, Ben. I'll check on Leia.," Natalie made her way to Leia's room. Leia was sitting quietly on the bed.

"You ok?"

"Just thinking about how to tell Ben about my condition."

"We're meeting an old colleague of mine tomorrow at 11am. I think he might be able to help us. You'll also meet my oldest friend, Twitch. I think you'll love him. He's good friends with Ben too. "

"Thank you, Natalie. I'll try not to get my hopes up."

"Are you comfortable in here? Is there anything you need, Leia?"

"No, I'll pull myself together and go see Ben and my grandchildren before everything changes tomorrow."

________________________________________________________________________________________

 

"You and mom were quiet at dinner. Did you have a fight?"

"No, of course not, Ben. Me and Twitch are taking her out for a bit tomorrow. She's a little depressed. Hopefully we can cheer her up. You think you can handle the kids tomorrow while we're gone?"

"Of course, I can handle anything, Mrs. Solo. What do I get in return?," Ben said knowing it would be a few weeks before they could have intercourse per his previous request.

"For doing your fatherly duties? The satisfaction of knowing that your wife, mother, and children would benefit. Mr. Solo, I would say that it is inappropriate for you to try to benefit from this situation, but I have an idea that might be fun for the both of us."

"Do tell, Mrs. Solo.," Ben said as he nipped lightly Nat's neck from behind her while she was getting her body massaged. 

"Do you know what a lap dance is, Ben?"

"No, but it sounds interesting enough that I will accept and let you explain it as we go."

"Ok, it won't take long and everyone's asleep now. Let's head downstairs to the gym and lock the door from the inside. It'll take me about 5 minutes to get ready once we're down there. You sit in the chair and relax. You won't be allowed to touch me or come on me while we're doing this."

"I thought you said we'd both enjoy this. It doesn't sound fun to me at all!," Ben said sarcastically.

"Trust me, Mr. Solo. Have I ever steered you wrong? Just give me a minute to grab some things and we can head down."

Nat grabbed what she needed and they headed in to the gym. Nat made sure to lock the door. Ben sat in the folding chair and waited patiently for Nat to finish what she was doing. When she came back, she was dressed in some emerald green lingerie and wearing thigh high boots with high heels along with some red matte lipstick. She had her hair up in a loose bun. Ben was hard at the sight of her. 

"I apologize for the haste, but you seemed to be insistent on some form of payment, Mr. Solo. I didn't have the time to put an actual routine together, but I think you'll enjoy the show nonetheless. Please hold for the music."

Ben watched her walk toward the music center to play a song. The song started and he watched her strut back toward him to the rhythm of the song.

Don't need permission  
Made my decision to test my limits

Nat strutted around Ben's chair and gently grabbed his hair as she sang loudly. 

'Cause it's my business, God as my witness  
Start what I finished  
Don't need no hold up  
Taking control of this kind of moment

Nat got on her knees and slowly crawled on the mat towards Ben while looking in his eyes and continuing to sing loudly.

I'm locked and loaded  
Completely focused, my mind is open

All that you got, skin to skin, oh my God  
Don't ya stop, boy

Nat made it to Ben's lap and rubbed her face in his crotch as she continued to sing loudly and maintain as much eye contact as possible. She used the Force like a cock ring on him and she could tell he was oh so close. His pants were stained in precome. 

Somethin' 'bout you makes me feel like a dangerous woman  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you  
Makes me wanna do things that I shouldn't  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout

Nat laid across Ben's legs and arched her back while she grabbed his hair gently and continued to sing loudly. She spread her legs wide and spun slightly to place them on either side of Ben's head to wrap them around him, then she proceeded to lie back and stroke her body from her neck to crotch. 

Nothing to prove and  
I'm bulletproof and  
Know what I'm doing  
The way we're movin' like introducing  
Us to a new thing

Nat did a very careful backflip to land on her heels. Ben was staring at her with his mouth slightly open and his pupils were blown wide with lust. She was still singing loudly. 

I wanna savor, save it for later  
The taste of flavor, 'cause I'm a taker  
'Cause I'm a giver, it's only nature  
I live for danger

Nat made her way back to Ben's lap and sat in it so she could wrap arms around his neck as he was behind her. She writhed her crotch across Ben's dick and she could feel him startle. She continued to sing loudly. 

All that you got, skin to skin, oh my God  
Don't ya stop, boy

Somethin' 'bout you makes me feel like a dangerous woman  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you  
Makes me wanna do things that I shouldn't  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you

Nat stopped the writhing and lifted off Ben's lap. Her ass was soaked in his precome. She knew he was absolutely desperate to come. She took another stroll around Ben's chair to grab his hair a little harder and nip then lick at his ear. She made her way back to his lap to sit on it and she stroked his neck before she slowly unbuttoned his shirt. She continued to sing loudly. 

All girls wanna be like that  
Bad girls underneath, like that  
You know how I'm feeling inside  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout  
All girls wanna be like that  
Bad girls underneath, like that  
You know how I'm feeling inside  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout

Nat stroked her hair, hands and face on Ben's face, chest, and neck. He was shaking with need. She continued to sing loudly.

Somethin' 'bout you makes me feel like a dangerous woman  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you  
Makes me wanna do things that I shouldn't  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you

Nat looked deep into Ben's eyes and continued to sing loudly. She started to slowly writhe her crotch over his dick again. 

All girls wanna be like that  
Bad girls underneath like that  
You know how I'm feeling inside  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout  
All girls wanna be like that  
Bad girls underneath like that  
You know how I'm feeling inside  
Somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout

Nat continued to hold Ben's gaze as she sang loudly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and increased the rhythm of her writhing.

Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy  
(somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you)  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy  
Yeah, there's somethin' 'bout you boy  
(somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout, somethin' 'bout you)

As the music ended, Ben was absolutely desperate to come and Nat knew it. He had been so patient and she knew he had enjoyed her performance. 

"Tell me, baby. Tell me what you need!"

"I need to touch you and kiss you. I need your mouth on me so I can spill every last bit of cum down your throat, baby."

"I give you permission, Ben."

Ben shakily moved his hands to Nat's hips and ass. He kissed her hungrily and they both moaned loudly. Nat reached down to Ben's pants to allow his dick to be free. He was sticky and wet with precome. Nat got on her knees to suck Ben's dick properly. She didn't waste time trying to clean him up. Ben loosened Nat's hair from the bun and it fell toward his crotch. After Ben thrusted a few times into Nat's mouth, she released the Force hold on Ben's dick. Ben came with full force into Nat's mouth and his eyes rolled as he grunted. Nat focused on not letting a drop spill from her mouth as she moaned softly. Nat made her way back to Ben's lap to straddle and hold him close. They were both spent. 

"Are you satisfied, Mr. Solo?"

"Yes, Mrs. Solo. That performance was impressive and I definitely want to see it again."

They slowly kissed each other before they gathered themselves to go to their room to clean up before bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to Ariana Grande for Dangerous Woman cause of course I don't own the song. I found it difficult to write a lap dance so I hope it turned out okay. If not, let me know!!


	59. The One Who is Destined For Great Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie confronts Neal to help Leia. Natalie's sweaty and Ben doesn't mind it. Abeloth offers Natalie a job and the twins show themselves to be wise beyond their years. Natalie may not be able to fix things this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is long and jumps around a bit. I am trying my hardest to finish this fic before The Last Jedi!!

Natalie got up early so she could fix breakfast and get all the kids cleaned and dressed to help Ben out while she and Leia were with Twitch. Nat and Leia kissed Ben and the kids goodbye before they got on the elevator to meet Twitch downstairs. 

"You ok, Leia?"

"I'm trying to be cautiously optimistic, Natalie. I've been resigned to my fate for a while now and I'm almost afraid to hope."

"Trust me. If there's a chance, we'll find it. We'll talk to Ben later about what we find out."

Natalie and Leia exited the elevator to meet Twitch in his waiting SUV. Twitch got out and opened the door to greet the women. "Thank you, Twitch, for coming. This is Leia Organa, Ben's mother."

"Ms. Organa, it is a pleasure to meet you.," Twitch says as he shakes Leia's hand. "I apologize that it's not under better circumstances. Your son is a wonderful husband and father. You should be proud."

"Twitch, it's good to meet you. Both Natalie and my son speak very highly of you. I can definitely appreciate a great nickname, but can you tell me your real name please?"

"It's Jonathan Myers, ma'am.," Twitch says with a smile.

"If you promise never to call me ma'am again and call me Leia instead, I stick with Twitch."

"Thank you, Leia.," Twitch said as they all shared a laugh. Twitch holds the car door open for Natalie and Leia. They all secure themselves in the vehicle before making their way to Neal's office.

____________________________________________________________________________

 

Twitch and Leia go to Dr. Pearce's waiting room while Natalie goes to the front desk to check them in. She's greeted by Robin, the receptionist.

"Hi Natalie. It's good to see you. You look wonderful."

"It's good to see you, too. I'm just checking us in. I need to talk with Neal for a few minutes before he sees the patient, please."

"Of course, let me let him know you are here. Just a moment.," Robin said as she went back to Neal's office.

Robin came back after a minute. "He's waiting for you in his office so you can go on back, Natalie. So good to see you again."

Natalie made her way back to Neal's office. Neal was sitting at his desk when she walked in, but stood when he saw her. "Natalie, you look radiant."

"Thank you for accommodating us today, Neal. Let's have a seat so we can talk." They both took their seats.

"Are you gonna tell me how it's possible that you're still alive?"

"I had an experimental procedure to remove the tumor. Afterwards, I healed up well. Unfortunately, the medical team that cured me is not available to publish any of their research or their techniques so that's all the information I can give you. I have a scar running from my left temple to the base of my skull as a reminder."

"I'm glad you're dong well, Natalie. Listen, I'm sorry--"

"I know you're sorry, Neal. If I ever find out you've been continuing to harass women, I will personally make sure that you pay for it. I never called you on your bullshit because we need you at this hospital. That is how much I respect your skills for the discipline. You insulted my husband--"

"So you married him?"

"Yes, I married him, Neal, and we have 3 children now. I didn't come here to rub this in your face. I came here to help his mother and he doesn't know that I'm here yet. If whatever you feel for me or him is going to be a problem, then I need to know now before I involve her."

"How could you suggest that I would allow any personal feelings I have interfere with my Hippocratic oath to help my patients? I have been nothing but---"

"Professional? That is exactly what you have not been in your dealing with me, Neal!"

Dr. Pearce was resigned to Natalie's judgment. "You're right. I behaved badly. I have no problems admitting it to you. I have feelings… for you that I didn't know how to properly express. I will regret that probably for the rest of my life, but I will honor my promise to you. You have to know that I took it seriously when I made it."

Natalie could feel that Neal was repentant and meant what he was saying. "Ok, I'm going to bring her in now. Neal, even though things were rough between us, I wish you the best in everything. We won't need to speak of this again."

Natalie left his office to get Twitch and Leia to bring them in. Natalie introduced Leia to Neal and they discussed her condition. Neal immediately recalled a doctor who would be able to offer some treatment options for Leia and he was able to call the doctor directly while they were in the office to arrange a same day consultation. Leia shook Neal's hand before Twitch guided her back to the vehicle downstairs so that Natalie and Neal could finish their business. 

"Natalie, if you ever need anything else from me, don't hesitate to contact me."

"Neal, thank you for your help and I hope you can find some peace and happiness." Natalie shook his hand before leaving his office.

Natalie stopped at the reception desk to talk to Robin. "It really was good to see you, Natalie. Take care."

"Good to see you again, too. Robin, can I give you some advice?"

"Sure."

"If you're really interested in Neal, know what you're getting into. I'd strongly suggest you finding other work, if you're serious about him. Call me if you want those details. If he's serious about you, you won't need to call me. Goodbye."

"Goodbye, Natalie."

Natalie met Leia and Twitch at the car to see Dr. Lofaso, the oncologist that Neal had referred them to. Dr. Lofaso examined Leia, ordered tests, and was able to determine some treatment options before all results were in. Leia felt comfortable enough to talk with Ben with some confidence that she could survive to live longer than initially anticipated. 

Natalie and Twitch talked in the waiting room while Leia was in the office with the doctor. "So I'm assuming you didn't have to sell your soul to get this favor from Pearce?"

"Nothing like that. He owed me and I collected. He thought he was in love with me and he mistakenly thought that harassing me was the way to my heart. I'm satisfied he's learned his lessons and that he won't make the same mistakes again."

"You sure Ben is gonna be ok with this, Nat?"

"His mom is gonna get the treatment she needs in part because of Neal. He'll get over it and we'll all be fine."

Leia came out of Dr. Lofaso's office, made an appointment for 1 week to discuss her test results, and firm up any future treatment plans. They returned to the vehicle and Twitch took Leia and Natalie back to Natalie's home. When Natalie and Leia made their way up in the elevator, the doors opened up to the twins running Ben ragged while he was trying to start dinner. Bella was comfortably asleep in their room. 

"Am I glad to see you ladies. Mom, did you have fun?"

"Everything went great, Ben. We can talk about it after dinner and the kids are asleep which looks like it shouldn't be a problem tonight with how active they are. I'm gonna get some rest before dinner. Thank you, Natalie.," Leia said as she kissed Natalie's cheek before going to her bedroom.

"Well, how was your day, Mr. Solo?"

"Hectic cause our twins have been pushing me to my limits, but we made it through. Bella was no trouble at all."

"As per usual then. Maybe we should start doing some training with them soon. It might calm them down. What do you think?"

"Maybe we should start with some meditation about it first? Maybe tomorrow morning?"

"Ok, in the meantime, I'll take them in their room to calm them down while you finish with dinner. You need help with dinner?"

"No, I got it. I missed you, Mrs. Solo."

"I missed you too, Mr. Solo.," Natalie said as she kissed Ben slowly before she picked up her giggling twins in her arms to take them back to their room. 

________________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben put the twins to bed and Natalie fed then put Bella to sleep. They both met Leia back in the living room to talk about their day. Leia told Ben that she was sick and that she had been given a poor prognosis in her time, but that with Natalie's help in her time, it was very likely that she would be able to live for many more years. Ben was upset that she hadn't told him sooner, but he got over it once he knew that she had some treatment options available. Ben and Natalie would go with Leia to her appointment the next week per her request. Leia knew that Ben had something planned for he and Natalie soon, so she agreed to watch the kids with Twitch's help so they could be gone for a few days. Ben hugged and kissed Leia before she went to bed leaving Ben and Natalie in the living room alone.

"Are you ok, baby?"

"I'm fine, just glad you were able to help my mom. You had to get help from that asshole, didn't you? Is that why you didn't tell me about this?"

"If by asshole, you mean Neal then yes, I did get help from him. That's not why I didn't tell you. Leia promised me she would tell you after we saw Neal and the doctor he referred us to. Ben, he owed me a favor and this was the best way for him to repay me. He's learned his lesson and he was nothing but professional with your mom. I talked with him before they even met."

"And how did that go?"

"It was fine. I just wanted to make sure that his experiences with me wouldn't keep him from helping us. I even told him that you knew nothing about it yet. We have nothing to worry about from him. If anyone needs to pulls his tongue out through his asshole, it will be me."

Ben smiled. "I love it when you talk dirty, baby!," Ben said as he drew her into a kiss.

Natalie enjoyed his attentions and said, "Hey, what's this I hear about us being gone a few days? You care to share our plans?"

"No, but maybe you could get it out of me with another lap dance!"

"Although that sounds very interesting, I am wiped out. Let's go to bed and maybe you can talk me into something less strenuous."

Ben and Natalie made their way to their bedroom. Nat had taken to sleeping naked except for her underwear due to her intermittent problems with night sweats. Ben didn't care and he would attempt to lick the sweat off her as a prelude to something more. It had been a particularly stressful day and she had consumed more caffeine than she should have so she was particularly sweaty tonight. 

"I've got my work cut out for me tonight, huh, baby?"

"Ben, I won't blame you if you want to take off sweat duty tonight. I'm particularly disgusting right now. As a matter of fact, I should shower."

"Don't be ridiculous, Nat. If you took baths instead of showers, I'd drink the bathwater if you asked me too. That's how pussy whipped and in love with you I am and I'm not ashamed of it. Now, get comfortable so you can get your tongue bath!"

"Ok, remember you asked for this, Ben!!"

"Baby, I beg for it. You know who and what I am. I am hopelessly, shamelessly, unabashedly, and completely in love with you.," Ben said as he punctuated every few words with licks and kisses to her neck.

Natalie laughed a little louder than she should. "Nat, are you gonna make me put a force bubble around us?," Ben said as he continued his ministrations careful not to elicit any more loud noises.

"I think that would be a good idea, Ben. We wouldn't want to wake up your mom or the kids."

"Your wish is my command, baby.," Ben said as he raised his arm and casted out to create the force bubble for them. "Now, I can get back to work."  
Ben continued to lick the sweat off Nat's chest. Natalie purred as he made his way down. When Ben got down to her underwear, he removed it with his teeth as he had done many times before. "Force, you smell so good!," Ben said before he plunged his nose deep into Natalie's crotch.

"Ben, you are so unrepentantly filthy and I fucking love you so much for it!," Nat said as she gently grabs his hair.

"I'm not done, baby. Sit on my face so I can finish us off.," Ben guided Natalie so she could get in position. 

"Ben, will you be able to breathe?"

"Don't worry, baby. I'm fine, just let me do all the work." Ben held on to her thighs with his hands and started at her clit, just using his tongue. Nat could hear him slurping and the sounds got her so close to coming. Ben stopped what he was doing with her clit and started fucking her with his tongue. "Grab my hair, please.," Ben projected to Natalie's mind and she obliged him. Ben went back to licking at her clit. "It's okay to let go, baby. Scream for me.," Ben projected to her mind and then his sucked on her clit. "Ben! Fuck! I love you!," Natalie screamed. Ben gently lifted her from his face and onto the bed so he could kiss her passionately. They were both exhausted from the day. They jumped in the shower for a quick clean up and brushed their teeth before they got back in bed and fell asleep. 

______________________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben and Natalie got up early so they could make breakfast and feed the kids so Leia could watch Xander, Lexi, and Bella while they were meditating in the gym. "Good morning, Mom. You feeling ok today?"

"I'm fine, Ben. It sounded like you two were having a lot of fun last night."

Both Ben and Natalie bristled at that statement. "Leia, I'm sorry about that. We'll try to be quieter from now on."

"It's fine. I'm jealous actually. After my treatments are done, I'm gonna try getting back out there myself so I can start having some fun for a change."

Ben was starting to become uncomfortable with the direction of this conversation. "Well, Leia. Some advice. Find a younger man because the stamina--". Ben put his hand over Nat's mouth and grabbed his wife to make their way down to the gym. Once the gym door was closed and locked, Ben took his hand away from his wife's grinning mouth to kiss her slowly.

"I love you, baby. Please refrain from giving my mom sex advice while I'm in the same room. I can't unhear that!!"

"Sorry, Ben. I couldn't resist. Are we meditating or are we gonna make more noises that Leia can be jealous of?"

"Stop! We are meditating." Ben took Nat's hand to lead her down to the mats. They both got into position to start their meditations. Natalie took two deep breaths and her eyes blackened as she fell back to the mat. Ben heard her as she started to hyperventilate. He jumped up to go to her and her skin was ice cold when he touched her. His mind thought of the worst case scenario--that she was sick again and he could lose her--as he picked her up in his arms to get her upstairs. He burst through the gym door and saw his mom sitting with the twins. "Ben, what happened?"

"I don't know! We were getting ready to meditate and I heard her fall back to the mat---," Ben felt Lexi and Xander tugging on either side of his pants.

"Daddy, Mommy's cold. She needs a blanky. Put her to bed.," Lexi says confidently in her nearly 3 year old voice.

"Baby, I should call Uncle Twitch--"

"Mommy will be fine, Daddy. Please listen to us.," Xander pleads equally confidently.

Ben feels slightly silly taking medical advice from his children, but he seems to feel that they are right. Leia is watching intently as Ben takes Natalie to their room to cover her up with blankets to warm her. Natalie calms mildly, but she's still hyperventilating.

"Daddy, put us in bed with Mommy, please! She's worried about us.," Lexi says and Ben obliges her by putting them in bed with their mother on either side of her. The twins each stroke one of Natalie's hands and either side of her face. She visibly calms, but is still hyperventilating.

"Daddy, she's worried about you, too! Tell her you'll be ok.," Xander says. Ben sits on the bed next to Natalie and Xander moves to sit with Lexi. Ben lifts the blanket to join Natalie underneath and holds her from behind like he usually does. He projects to her that he's fine and he kisses her hair. Natalie's eyes remain blackened, but her hyperventilation stops and she breathes calmly like she's asleep. 

 

"Ben, I'll sit with her while you go in the living room with the kids, ok?"

"Thanks, mom.," Ben says as the twins lead him out to the living room couch.

"How did you guys know how to help Mommy?"

"We saw it in here while we was asleep.," Lexi says pointing to her temple.

"Mommy's talking to that Abe-lady. She wants her to take a portant job.," Xander says

"Abeloth wants her to take an important job?"

"She had to take Mommy to a special place to ask her. She will come back later, Daddy.," Lexi says.

Ben was flabbergasted at their knowledge of the situation. "Do you guys see a lot while you're asleep?"

"Sometimes we see things when we're awake too, Daddy.," Xander says. 

"Do you remember all the things you see?"

"We get a funny feeling when we see it happen. Everything we saw hasn't happened, Daddy.," Lexi says.

"But you remember all of it?"

"We members a lot. We members when we was in Mommy's belly and the bad men took her away.," Xander says.

"We members when you rubbed Mommy's belly cause we liked it a lot. We members how happy you and Mommy was when you guys did yucky grownup stuff," Lexi says with a giggle and Ben blushes at this.

"We members how sad you was when Mommy was sick, but you took care of her.," Xander says.

Ben was in awe of what his children were telling him. They were so powerful already, but seemed at ease with the burden of their powers. He hoped that he and Nat could keep them safe from predators like Snoke. 

"Don't worry, Daddy. We know you and Mommy can protect us. We can all protect each other.," Lexi says. The twins make their way to Ben's arms and he holds them tightly.

________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Natalie's eyes opened with Abeloth next to her. The last thing she remembered was attempting to meditate and feeling like she was freezing cold with no idea if her family was ok. She knew they were safe now though. "What happened to me?"

"I needed to bring you somewhere, Natalie."

Natalie looked around. She was definitely not on Earth right now. She saw floating mountains, forests, and molten caverns. 

"This is Mortis, Natalie. It was the home of the Ones. The Father, the Son, and the Daughter. They were my family. I did things that forced them to imprison me here. I need you to learn this history."

"You couldn't have prepared me better for this trip. My family is probably worried about me."

"They know you are fine. I need to prepare you. You will be tested."

"Why? How? For what?"

"The Force needs a Keeper of the Balance, Natalie. It can be you if you accept the responsibility."

"Why does the Force need such a person?"

"Without balance, there is chaos in the galaxy."

"Why me? Can't I just live with my family and be happy for a while?"

"There is a price to pay for the power you can wield, Natalie."

"I didn't ask for this! You used Snoke to bring me back. I brought peace to the galaxy. I think that at least buys me a vacation."

"There are always threats to the galaxy at many points in time. You are mentally equipped to deal with such things. You are fit for it."

"So you're saying that I'm the only one who can do this?"

"You are the best person to do this, Natalie. Until your children are ready for the task."

"What if they don't want to do it? What if I don't want to do it?"

"It's not about wanting, it is a calling. Had Anakin Skywalker taken his rightful place, the galaxy may not have fallen into chaos."

"But you said yourself that the galaxy is at risk from multiple points in time. How am I supposed to cover that much ground?"

"With the help of your family. I'm not saying it will be easy, but it needs to be done."

"So we have no choice in the matter?"

"I know it seems that way, but I think you will find that things will be easier for your family when you accept this charge."

"You said I would be tested. Does that have to do with what I saw on the way here?"

"Yes, that is one of many tests."

"How do I stop it?"

"I'm not sure that you can, but that is the test."

"Why does this feel like a punishment to me, Abeloth? I finally have everything I've ever wanted and the Force wants to take it from me?"

"The Force is not out to get you. The Force is helping you by showing what could happen so that you can make other choices."

"Show me what you need to show me so I can go home please. I'll think about this Keeper of the Balance thing, ok?"

"I think you will see that this is the best choice for you, no matter what happens with your test."

Abeloth proceeded to show and tell Natalie about her history with the Ones and about Mortis. Natalie was listening intently, but she was very worried about the challenges her family was about to face and if she would be able to keep them safe. After about 30 minutes, Abeloth decided that Natalie had enough information to make her decision. 

"So no advice this time?"

"Natalie, I'm confident in your ability to make good decisions. That was the whole point of our conversation. May the Force be with you."

With that, Natalie left her meditative state and woke up in her own bed in her home surrounded by her children and husband. Ben had his arms wrapped around her from behind like he usually did and he felt her stir. "You ok, baby? We were worried for a little bit."

"I'm sorry I worried you, baby. I'm fine. Listen, do you mind if I go down to the gym for a bit. I just want to do some running right now.," Natalie said as she got out of bed to go downstairs.

"Do you want me to come?"

"No, I'll be fine. I'll see you in a while."

Ben was stunned, but he figured Nat would talk to him about what happened when she was ready. Whatever it was, he hoped it wouldn't interfere with the mini vacation he had planned for them. 

_________________________________________________________________________

 

Natalie made it down to the gym, put on her ear buds, and started running around the track. She couldn't tell Ben what she saw before she met with Abeloth on Mortis. There was no way she would let him die now that they had the life that both wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did bring Mortis into the fic cause it interests me. The Ones interest me a bit, but not enough for them to make an appearance. I couldn't find a good reason for them to still be around and not in the Force. If you want to discuss, please feel free to make a comment.


	60. The One Problem She Couldn't Solve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natalie is slowly being driven mad by her dilemma. Ben is resigned to his fate. Lexi and Xander drop some knowledge. Ben has a romantic surprise. Ben and Abeloth discuss Natalie's issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some angst with smut sprinkled throughout.

"You barely touched your dinner, Nat. Was it too spicy for you?," Ben said trying to get some sort of conversation started with his wife after her "incident" during their attempts at meditation this morning. She had said very little to him since she came around.

"It was fine. Just not hungry. I'm going to bed. Goodnight.," Natalie said as she left Ben in the kitchen to clean up after dinner. She didn't know what to say to him. Every scenario she visualized resulted in his death. They were gonna be going on this trip he had planned for them within the next week and that seemed to be when this would happen. When she thought about them staying home and not going, even that led to the same conclusion in a different manner. She took a quick shower to try to clear her head and then she got in bed. The whole day had been exhausting. Hopefully, she could find some peace in her sleep. She dozed off nearly immediately. She drifted into a dream of her and Ben on their trip. Slight changes were made in the scenario she dreamed, but still the same things happened to Ben. She made it to the point in her dream where her hands and face were covered in Ben's blood. The light in his eyes went out and she awoke to Ben holding her in his arms while she was violently shaking. 

"Baby, it's ok. I'm here. You're safe.," Ben whispered into her ear as he stroked her hair to try and calm her.

"I- I need to get up and go downstairs--"

"No, you need to talk to me, Nat. Please! I know something is wrong and that you're afraid. I trust you. You don't have to tell me anything, but at least acknowledge what you're feeling. I feel it too, remember? Don't push me away. I can't handle that!

Natalie could admit to herself that her behavior toward him since she came back from Mortis wasn't fair. "I'm sorry, Ben. I can't give you any details, but you're right. Sometimes our bond is so seamless that I forget it's there." Tears came to her eyes and Ben moved to look her in the eyes.

"Whatever it is, I know it's gonna be ok, Nat."

"You don't know that, Ben!"

"I know whatever it is that you are trying your best to make it ok. That's what's got you so upset. You always try to make everything ok, baby. That's who you are, that's who I fell in love with." Ben took her face that was wet with tears into his hands and kissed her softly. Natalie let him deepen their kiss and she relished it because she knew their time was finite. 

"Make love to me, Ben. Please.," Natalie said as she stroked Ben's dick through his pants.

"I thought we were supposed to wait--"

"That was your idea. We have lube on hand, we can go slow.," Natalie whispered as she tongued at Ben's neck and bit playfully at his earlobe.

Ben couldn't deny her anything. "If I hurt you, we'll stop, ok?" Natalie nodded yes. Ben raised his hand and cast out with the Force to create a bubble around them. He didn't want anymore embarrassing conversations with his mom or his children about their sex life. 

Ben stroked Nat's face like he hadn't seen her in a while. He kissed away the remaining tears that were there. He rested his forehead on hers. "I love you, baby. Are you sure you want to do this now?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I've never been afraid of this, Ben. I just need you so much right now." Natalie stroked Ben's scar from his face to his shoulder. She kissed the corners of his mouth gently. When she kissed his lips to open his mouth and deepen their kiss, she wanted to wallow in his plush lips. Their tongues met and they both moaned. Their hands moved to discard each other's clothes so they could be skin to skin. 

"This may be a strange request right now, but can I give you a massage, baby?"

"I don't turn down your massages, Ben. Is this a ploy for you to be able to rub your dick on my ass cause that's probably unnecessary at this point?"

Ben grinned. "I just want to relax you, baby. That's all. I promise.," Ben said as he placed a trail of butterfly kisses from her collarbone to her ear. He moved behind her to massage her. Ben could immediately feel the tension in her muscles so he knew she needed this. He started on her neck and when he could feel her tension release he moved on to her shoulders and back. All the while he would kiss her hair and neck. 

"Ben, if you keep this up, I might fall asleep and the little Prince won't get his reward.," Natalie said as she started to get a bit drowsy. 

"It's ok if you sleep, baby. You obviously need it." Ben thought on her words for a minute. "Did you just refer to my dick as the little Prince?"

"Uh hmm. What's wrong you don't like that one?"

"Well, I'm not self conscious about the size of my dick, but it is not little so that one is not really appropriate." 

"Well how about just the Prince then?," Natalie says then she purrs as Ben continues massaging her lower back.

Ben thought about it and smiled. "That is acceptable if you must name it, baby. Now, I can continue to massage you if you need it but I can tell you're tired. Or you can prepare to service the Prince, fair maiden."

Natalie giggled and soon Ben joined her. "I love making you laugh, baby. You know I live to satisfy you."

"I want you now. I can sleep later. Please."

"You know the only hesitation I have is that I don't want to hurt you. I never want to do that."

"You won't hurt me. I promise. Please. Make love to me, Ben.," Natalie turned to Ben and tongued at his neck then gently made her way down to his nipples. Ben moaned as he reached out to grab Natalie's hair so he could bring her up to his mouth and kiss her. Natalie wrapped her legs around Ben's hips while they were side to side as they kissed hungrily. Ben seemed to know that she wanted to straddle him so he rolled so that she was on top. Ben ran his hands down her back to her ass. He helped her seat herself on him slowly. They both arched their backs and breathed deeply. They were both so close. Natalie rolled her hips and Ben moved to meet her. Their mouths crashed together to furiously kiss while their bodies stayed entangled. When they came, they moaned into each other's mouths. They were already preparing for the next round.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Ben had only gotten maybe an hour of sleep, but he was ok. He knew his wife needed to rest. They made love for hours reminiscent of shortly after they first met. Ben got up to make breakfast for the kids and his mom. He thought about how Nat had touched him and looked at him when they were together last night into the morning. She didn't say anything, but he knew--he was going to die and Nat was scared out of her mind that she couldn't save him. Ben never thought he would live this long or have the life that he had now. As long as he knew that his family would be safe, he wasn't afraid of death and if he was honest with himself, at times he had welcomed it. He was far from that now, but he wouldn't let this stop him from trying to keep his family happy. 

After Ben finished cooking, he covered everything to keep it warm cause everyone else was still asleep. He grabbed Bella from her crib in their room to feed and change her and he stole a look at his sleeping wife. It was amazing. Bella was like Nat's twin. He got Bella out to the living room where he had a bottle waiting for her. He sat on the couch with his daughter and placed the bottle in her waiting mouth. Bella stared into his eyes and held onto his finger as she suckled. Ben thought about the moments in her life he was going to miss out on. He quickly let that thought go as he focused on the here and now. Leia came out of her room and into the living room.

"Good morning, Ben and Bella. How's Natalie?"

"She's still asleep. I'd be surprised if she got up before lunch time. She needed some rest."

"Did she talk to you about what happened?"

"No, she'll tell me when she's ready. Honestly, I don't care as long as she's safe." Bella finished her bottle and looked as though she may fall back to sleep.

"I'll take Bella to change her and put her to sleep. You want to check on the twins? I heard them stirring earlier."

"Yea, I'll do that. Thanks, mom.," Ben said as he handed his youngest daughter to her grandmother. 

Ben knocked on the twins' door before he walked in. They were awake and playing quietly. "You guys ok? I've got breakfast ready."

"We are ok, Daddy. We was giving you some quiet time with Bella.," Xander said.

"Thank you for that. Are you guys hungry?"

"We starvin', Daddy. Don't worry. We stay quiet while Mommy is sleepin'.," Lexi said.

Ben led the children out to the kitchen table so he can feed them. Bella was asleep so he took her from his mom to put her in their room again where Natalie was still sleeping. He went back to the kitchen to plate up food for himself, his kids, and his mom. 

After breakfast, Ben got the kids dressed. He read to them a little and promised to put them to bed with a story. He left them in their room with the door open to play on their own. 

"Mom, I'm tired. Do you mind listening out for the kids while I get some more sleep?"

"No problem, Ben. You ok?"

"I'm fine, Mom. Thank you.," Ben said after he kisses his mother's cheek before going to his bedroom.

Ben laid in bed next to his sleeping wife and he wrapped his arms around her careful not to wake her. He fell asleep nearly immediately.

____________________________________________________________________________

 

It started again. She had seen the same scene with multiple tweaks what seemed like a hundred times at this point. They all ended the same--with her covered in Ben's blood and him dying. She again awoke in Ben's arms violently shaking and he tried to comfort her. This had to stop. Nat was dying inside because of guilt over something that Ben knew she shouldn't feel guilty about. 

"Baby, let's get you in the shower. You'll feel better and then we'll get you some food. You haven't eaten anything substantial in 24 hrs, Nat."

Nat agreed cause she just wanted to lose herself in Ben right now. They both got in the shower and helped her clean herself up. Once they got showered and dressed, Ben led Nat out to the kitchen table to get her some food. 

"Mornin', Mommy. Are you ok?," Lexi said.

"I'm just tired, baby. Don't worry about me."

"Mommy, can you come in our room for a minute?," Xander said.

"Ok, you guys go ahead and I'll meet you there.," The twins ran back to their room.

"Natalie, you're looking a little rough. Is there anything I can do for you?," Leia said.

"I'll be ok, Leia. Thank you.," Natalie said as she left the room to follow her twins. 

As she entered Lexi and Xander's room, she noticed it was the cleanest it had been since she and Ben set it up.

"Everything ok, guys?"

"Close the door so we can talk, Mommy.," Lexi said.

Natalie obliged them and felt a bit weird that her children were behaving so grownup. 

"Mommy, we know you worried about Daddy. He will be ok.," Xander said.

"How do you know that, Xander?"

"We seen it in here, Mommy.," Lexi said pointing to her temple. 

"You already know how to help Daddy, Mommy. You just have to member it.," Xander said.

"You both know what I've been seeing?"

"Yes, Mommy. It is making you so sad, but you shouldn't be sad.," Lexi said.

"Daddy knows why you are sad, Mommy. He doesn't want you to be mad cause he found out.," Xander said.

"I'm not mad at him. I'm mad at myself for not being able to help him."

"But you will help him, Mommy. Trust us, ok.," Lexi says as she hugs and kisses Natalie.

"I trust you both. Thank you.," Natalie says as Xander hugs and kisses her. 

They leave the room to return to the kitchen table where Ben has made some soup and sandwiches for lunch. Everyone sits down to eat and the mood is much better. 

After lunch, Nat puts the twins down for a nap and grabs Bella to feed and change her. She puts Bella back to sleep and lies down for a nap herself then Ben joins her. 

"You ok, baby?"

"I'm still tired, but better. Our children are so brilliant. I talk to them and it's like I'm talking to adults. I don't want them to have to grow up so fast."

"Their strength in the Force is amazing. I was nothing like that at their age and they're so at ease with it. Are you ready to talk yet, Nat?" 

"Can we do it later tonight? I just want us to hold each other right now. Maybe we'll catch a nap too, if we're lucky."

Nat straddled Ben to lay against his chest and she wrapped her arms around his neck while he wrapped his arms around her waist. Ben would usually have gotten hard by now, but it wasn't in his mind to do that now. He wanted to keep his wife close to comfort them both. They both purred in satisfaction a bit before they fell asleep.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Natalie was cleaning up the kitchen after she made dinner earlier. Leia was resting in her room and Ben was putting the twins to bed with a story.  
She sat down at the kitchen table and started having another vision--essentially the same vision with a variation on the theme and the same exact dreaded ending. Ben came back out to the kitchen as Nat was coming to the end of her vision. He knew what was happening to her and he tried to bring her out of it as easily as possible. He gently touched her hands and she startled a bit. 

"Come on, baby. Let's go to bed. We're both still exhausted."

He led Nat to the bedroom and sat her down on the bed. He got undressed for bed first then he helped Nat do the same. Ben got them in bed and got behind Nat to massage her so she could sleep. "How did you find out, Ben?"

Ben knew what she meant right away. "I suspected when you didn't talk to me about what happened to you. I knew the kids were ok because you treated them exactly the same. I felt the guilt coming through the bond, but I knew you hadn't done anything wrong. Nat, you should never feel guilty about anything. If it's my time to die, I accept it."

"I should be protesting and saying no. That you're wrong. But I've seen it so many different times and so many different ways. I'm covered in your blood and I just watch you die. ," Natalie said as Ben moved in front of her to comfort her.

"Don't do this to yourself, Nat. Don't. I'm not worth it."

"Stop it! If you weren't worth it, this wouldn't be so hard for me! We need both of us to fight this! You have a family that loves you, Ben! Don't give up on us, please!!"

"I'm not giving up. Some things are just inevitable even with our Force visions and dreams. I'm not gonna lay down and die, but some things are just out of our control. It's one of the things you have to live with when the Force is so strong in your life."

"I'm gonna do everything in my power to keep you with me. I just need you to do the same, Ben. I love you."

"I love you too, baby. Let's get some rest.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben and Natalie went with Leia to her follow up doctor's appointment to review her test results and discuss final treatment plans while Twitch watched the twins and Bella. Dr. Lofaso was very encouraged by Leia's results and felt she would make a full recovery once her treatment was completed. Leia made plans to start her treatments after Ben and Natalie returned from their trip. 

Natalie wanted to start packing for their trip and she realized that Ben still hadn't told her where they were going or for how long. When they got home from Leia's appointment, she went to sit on their bed. It was happening again. The visions had slowed down a lot since she had talked to Ben about what she was seeing, but they hadn't stopped completely. Ben tried to be there for her through them, but it wasn't full proof. The visions came at any time. She was just getting to the part that was always the same when Ben came into their bedroom. He touched her face to bring her out of it. "You trying to get packed, baby?"

"Yes, but you never told me where we're going or for how long."

"Well, you should pack for warm days with slightly cooler nights. Enough for a week. Does that help?"

"It would help more if you would just tell me where we're going!"

"We're going to my grandmother's home planet of Naboo. I heard from my mother that it's very beautiful and I wanted to share it with you. I got Luke to make all the arrangements for us.," Ben said as he brought Natalie off the bed to stand next to him. "I know we'll love it. We never had a honeymoon so this was as close as I could come to that."

Tears came to Natalie's eyes. "You are so--. I can't be without you."

"No, we're not gonna do this. We are gonna have our honeymoon and not worry about anything else, ok?," Ben said as he wiped her tears away and kissed her lips quickly.

"Ok, I'm gonna start working on dinner if you wanna check on the kids." They both left their bedroom to do their tasks. Natalie cooked a ton of food--some for that night and some for the days when they were gone on the trip so Leia wouldn't have to worry so much about meals. She even threw in some desserts to keep the kids more compliant. By the end of the night, Natalie was exhausted. Ben put the kids to bed with a story as was becoming custom. Leia had turned in for the night. Natalie jumped in the shower to quickly relax and clean herself up. Ben joined her after he fed Bella and put her to bed. 

"Hey, Mr. Solo. Fancy meeting you here.," Natalie said as she smiled.

"I got lucky to find you naked, Mrs. Solo. You feel up to some shower sex?"

"Ok, you talked me into it."

Ben picked Natalie up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Ben walked them under the water spray to get them wet and then he pressed Natalie's back into the shower wall. They kissed hungrily and of course, Ben was hard once he stepped into the shower and saw his wife naked. Ben eased Natalie onto his dick and they shuddered at the contact. Their breathing intensified and they hurriedly fucked each other. Right before they were about to come, Nat looked into Ben's eyes and said "I love you." Ben spilled his seed as he explored Nat's mouth and moaned loudly. It took awhile for them to come down from their orgasm and when they did, Ben set Natalie down on the shower floor so they could both finish cleaning up. 

When they got out of the shower and dried off, they both went to bed naked. Ben took his usual place behind her in bed so he could massage her to sleep. As per usual, Ben was hard right away naked in bed with his wife even though they had just made love in the shower. He ignored his erection for now. He knew his wife was exhausted because her sleep and waking moments had been disturbed recently by horrible visions of his death. He hoped he could get her a good night's sleep with a full body massage tonight and that they could start their trip well rested. It didn't take her long to fall asleep, but she was carrying so much tension in her muscles that Ben continued to massage her hoping that would extend her rest. Ben waited until Natalie had been asleep for about an hour before he stopped massaging her and tried to sleep himself.

After they both slept for a few hours, Natalie started to dream again. It started so well. She and Ben enjoyed their time in Naboo and it was magical. Later, it expectedly devolved into the same ending that Natalie dreaded more and more with each iteration of this nightmare. Natalie awoke again in Ben's arms, but this time she was inconsolable. Luckily, he had remembered the Force bubble when he entered their bedroom. Ben was obligated to use the Force to put her to sleep and he covered her naked body with a blanket. He was sick of this. His wife was suffering unnecessarily. He'd be willing to die right now if this would end this cruel torture for her. He went down to the gym to meditate and see if he could end this at least until they had their honeymoon. 

Once Ben entered his meditation, he called out to Abeloth. 

"I had hoped we would meet under better circumstances, Ben."

"Why is this happening to her?"

"Her bond with you is extremely strong. Her will and determination are also very strong. She considers herself a problem solver and your death is a problem she has yet to solve. This will continue for her until she solves the problem or you die. It is not the Force that is responsible for this torture. It is her own mind."

"I accept that my time is coming to an end. I can accept that she can't save me. I just want 7 days uninterrupted to say goodbye. Can you help me?"

"This is quite irregular, but not impossible. I will do what I can to keep her from continuing to drive herself mad with these visions. You also should consider what will happen to her when your bond is broken after you die. Things could get much worse for her."

"Can you fix it?"

"I can try to heal the wound, but the bond will never truly close. You should speak with Anakin if you wish to commune with Natalie after your death."

"Thank you, Abeloth. For everything. I've known the happiness I always wanted because of your role in bringing Nat and I together. I know you'll watch over my family when I'm gone."

"You're welcome, Ben. May the Force be with you." With that, she disappeared from his meditation. He called out to Anakin to discuss his plans for the afterlife in the Force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Naboo, here we come!!


	61. The One I Need to Show My Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben feels Nat's wrath. Romance and smut in Naboo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of smut. I won't meet my goal of completion before the Last Jedi, but who cares?? It's an alternate universe fic anyway!!

After his meditation, Ben returned to bed with his sleeping wife. A few hours later, Natalie awoke as she did most mornings, in Ben's arms. She wallowed in him for awhile and ran her hands over his arms. Ben stirred and finally awoke himself. "Good morning, Nat.," Ben said as he kissed her hair in few different places.

"You knocked me out again!"

Ben sighed. "Yes, I did. If you would refrain from killing me until after our honeymoon--. Owww!!"

"You promised you wouldn't do that to me again, you shitty asshole!!," Natalie said after she elbowed Ben really hard in his ribs.

"Mrs. Solo, you are deceptively strong for your size which should be well known to me by now. I suppose this isn't the time to tell you that this was actually the 3rd time I've knocked you out---. Owww!!"

"You jackass, that isn't funny!!," Natalie says after she elbows Ben in the ribs on the opposite side.

Ben moves to Natalie's front to avoid her elbows and try to talk her down from her anger. "Baby, I'm sorry. I only did it to calm you down and get you some rest. You're driving yourself crazy with these visions and dreams. I want you well rested for our trip. I want us to enjoy ourselves. We deserve it."

Natalie thought to herself for a few moments. "I've been very unfair, haven't I? When I found out I was dying, I gave you this speech about growing up. I need to follow my own advice." Natalie stroked Ben's facial scar. "Can I ask you something, Ben?"

"Ask me anything, baby."

"What was it like for you when I died?," Natalie said as she searched Ben's eyes.

Ben hadn't thought about these things for awhile and he had never shared it with Nat before. "I-uh. It felt like someone had ripped out a piece of my heart and my brain at the same time." Ben closed his eyes as he remember that time in his life. "The only thing that got me through it was those children. They were pieces of you that I could hold on to and nurture. When I put them to bed at night, I let my anger and hurt out. I didn't think I would be able to pull myself together, but when they cried and they needed me, I pulled myself together cause I knew you would want me to."

Natalie reflected on Ben's words. "Let's go on our honeymoon and just lose ourselves in each other. Not think about anything else.," Natalie said as she softly kissed Ben's lips. Ben gently captured Nat's lips and slowly drew her into a deeper kiss. They both moaned, but realized that anything more could wait until they got to Naboo. They both got up to get dressed and have breakfast with their kids and Leia before they left on their trip.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Once Ben got his ship off planet, he set the autopilot and met his wife in bed. He knew she still needed some rest and he was going to help get her to sleep with a massage. "How long will it take for us to get to Naboo, Ben?" Natalie said before she purred from his relaxing hands on her body.

"About 5 hours so we should both be able to get some rest before we get there.," Ben said as he continued his ministrations.

"How do you expect me to go to sleep with the Prince poking me in the back?" Natalie purrs drowsily.

Ben grinned. "Baby, you should be used to this by now. If it won't interfere with your rest too much, the Prince would appreciate any service you wish to provide."

Natalie turned to Ben and kissed him hungrily. "What would make you come faster?," Natalie projected into Ben's mind.

"Your mouth, please.," Ben responded via projection as he responded to the passionate kiss. 

Natalie slowly pulled away from their kiss to lightly nip at Ben's neck as he moaned. She made her way down to his nipples and sucked both of them till they peaked. She looked down at his ribs and saw some bruising on both sides. "I really hurt you with those elbows?," Natalie questioned into Ben's mind as she looked at him with concern and lightly touched the areas with her fingers.

Ben smiled. "Baby, I'm fine. You know I've had a lot worse. Please don't worry.," Ben said into her mind.

"You know I never meant to hurt you. I never want to hurt you, Ben.," Natalie said her eyes became dewy with tears.

"Stop, baby. Don't waste your tears on this, please." Ben kissed her eyes and the few tears that flowed from them. He stroked his hand down her scar to calm her and smiled. "You still feel up to giving the Prince his reward?"

Natalie smiled as her mood got better. "The Prince may have my mouth and if that is not enough then I can continue to service him in other ways."

"I think your mouth will be just fine, Mrs. Solo."

Natalie continued to make her way down to Ben's hard dick. She teases by taking the head into her mouth for a moment and then pulling away to lick around the sides of his cock then down to his balls. She takes his balls into her mouth and rolls them around. Ben's eyes roll to the back of his head and he's so close. Ben caresses Nat's head. "Please, baby. I need to come.," Ben projects to Natalie's mind. 

Natalie takes Ben's dick into her mouth properly and eases down until his tip is touching the back of her throat. "Where do you want to come, Ben?," Natalie projects to him as she gets a rhythm started.

"I just need you to take it all down your throat. Please." 

Natalie's teeth grazed Ben's dick just slightly to appease the masochistic side of him and she could see him shake with need, hear him moan as she looked in his eyes. "You can fuck my mouth harder if you want, baby.," she said calling out his sadistic side. Natalie knew Ben would never intentionally hurt her, but she also knew him. She knew the excitement and pleasure he could experience, but sometimes he would hold back if he thought she could be hurt. At times, she would challenge this because she loved him and she wanted him to be happy in all things. 

Ben was very happy with Nat. Even he would admit that he sometimes held back, but when Nat gave him permission to be himself, he relished it. He wasn't ashamed to let his wife take the lead especially when it led to more pleasure for him. He tightened his grip on Nat's hair and thrusted his hips to meet her mouth. Her eyes were starting to water, but love, pleasure, and excitement flowed through their bond. Right before Ben was about to come, he held Nat's head down so she could take in all of his seed as he pumped it into her mouth. When she was sure she had cleaned him up and not missed any of his semen, she licked her lips and made her way to Ben's mouth. They kissed hungrily, but both were tired. 

"I love it when you taste like me, baby. I'm gonna fuck you so hard later.," Ben projected to Natalie's mind. 

"You promise?" she projected back. She moved in bed so that Ben was behind her again massaging her to a likely restful sleep.

Ben checked her neck, shoulders, and back for any remaining tension, but there was none. He massaged her back a little before she fell asleep and he did as well not long after with his arms around his wife. 

_______________________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben and Natalie left the ship and made their way to Naboo's Lake Country. Ben told Nat the details of how his grandparents spent a lot of time there and it was later learned that they married there. They sat on a transport to their hotel and held each other while Ben stroked Natalie's hair. An old woman observed them from her seat. Natalie saw her and smiled. The old woman smiled back and nodded. The woman seemed familiar, but Natalie let go of that thought and she took a nap on Ben's shoulder.

Natalie woke up when the transport stopped at their destination. The old woman that Natalie saw earlier was gone, but she forgot about that when they exited the transport and she took notice of how beautiful it was where they were. There was an olive grove nearby and iris flower beds. Ben led her to where some of the hotel staff were waiting for them. Ben had rented them a little villa for the week. The staff showed them around and offered to be at their service should they need anything before they left.

"Ben, how are you paying for this?"

"I'm not paying for anything. Our family legacy and Luke's work for the new government was all that we needed to make the arrangements for this week. They were more than happy to do this for us once they learned about your work for the new government as well. The only thing we have to worry about is enjoying ourselves, baby.," Ben said as he kissed her quickly. 

"So, what do you have planned for us?"

"You hungry?"

"Starved. You gonna take us to lunch?"

"Yes, let's go to the restaurant to eat lunch and then we can ride some fathiers around the countryside before dinner."

They left the villino for the restaurant and tried some things from their tasting menu. Natalie drank a couple glasses of wine to relax herself even more. Ben even tried some wine and he may have even liked it. After lunch, they walked to the fathier stalls to take an afternoon ride around the countryside. The fathiers were beautiful creatures and they were so responsive to their riders. 

"The villa, the restaurant, the countryside…. Everything is so wonderful here. I wish we could----"

"Don't. We're gonna stay in the here and now, ok, Nat? This is our honeymoon. We deserve to enjoy it. Nothing else matters.," Ben said as he sidled his fathier next to Natalie's to kiss her face. 

Natalie got her mind back on track. "What is planned for tomorrow, Mr. Solo."

"Oh no, we're still in the here and now, today. After we finish with the animals, we will get dressed to have dinner. Then, I'll keep my earlier promise to you about a hard fuck, Mrs. Solo."

"I can't wait."

They got back to the villino and dressed for dinner. Nat was wearing a strapless red dress that accentuated her arms and fell just below her knees accentuating her legs with matching heels. She also put on her red matte lipstick. Her loose curly black hair was in a bun with strands that fell to her shoulders. She waited for Ben to come out and he was well worth the wait. Ben was wearing a dark blue suit with a double breasted jacket and a red tie. She'd really have to thank Twitch for introducing him to couture and finding a tailor who could dress him properly. When Ben saw Nat, he was floored. Of course, he got hard immediately as usual. "You're so beautiful, Nat. Maybe we should skip dinner--," Ben said as he bit at Nat's earlobe.

"Oh no, I'm starving. Our lust can wait for just a few hours. We have all night to ravage each other, Mr. Solo. " They walked arm in arm slowly to the restaurant so Ben had time to get the Prince under control. 

When they got to the restaurant, they were seated next to the lake. It was a mostly comfortable night with a light breeze in the air. Both Ben and Natalie drank a little wine before and with dinner. The food was, of course, exquisite. They both shared from each other's plates and had difficulty keeping their hands off one another. After dessert, they left the restaurant and walked around the lake a bit. It had gotten colder so Ben took his suit jacket off and wrapped it around his wife's shoulders. They kissed near the water as they held hands. They finally made their way back to the villino and slowly undressed each other on their way to the bedroom once they were behind closed doors. 

Ben and Natalie sloppily kissed each other and shared some laughs. "I believe you may be drunk, Mr. Solo."

"I might be. I always avoided alcohol because I thought it would interfere with my connection to the Force. I know I don't have to worry about that anymore. If I am drunk, I like it. It's not just the alcohol.," Ben said as he tongued at Natalie's neck. "I feel like I'm dreaming. Being here with you. Having the kids. This life is more than I ever dreamed of. I love you so much. I need you to know it, Nat. I need to show you."

"I love you too. You show me everyday, Ben. Maybe we should drink a little water so you can try to clear the alcohol from your system."

"Nat, I'm fine. I just need you. Just let me show you.," Ben punctuated each sentence with a kiss to Natalie's lips. He got behind his wife in bed and started with soft kisses to the back of her neck and shoulders before he moved on to her back. He started at the gnarled scars of her upper back with some reverence. He could feel her tense a bit while he spent some time there. He told her that every part of her was beautiful through their bond and he could feel her tension ease along with appreciation and love flowing back to him. Ben slowly and achingly moved down Natalie's back till he got to the cleft of her ass where he left a warm kiss before massaged her cheeks and gently turned his wife over so he could better appreciate the front of her body. He took Natalie's hair down and let it fall so he could caress the scar on the left side of her scalp. Ben brought both hands to the sides of her face and drew his wife in to kiss her softly. He stroked the scar on the right side of her face then caressed her neck while he placed some kisses there. He slowly moved down to her scarred chest. Natalie purred as Ben kissed each scar while love and appreciation continually flowed each way of their bond. Ben seamlessly moved from her chest to her abdomen where he gave those scars the same care and attention. Moving on from Natalie's abdomen, Ben buried his face in her pubic hair while she grabbed on to his hair. Natalie had gotten so wet while Ben was admiring her body that when he sucked at her clit and fucked her vagina with his tongue, the filthiest sounds could be loudly heard. Every time Natalie would get close to coming, Ben would slow down his ministrations and then begin to ramp them up again. After a few rounds of this, Natalie became desperate for Ben to fuck her and he could feel it through their bond. Ben stood up from the bed and gently got his wife to her knees in front of him so he could give her the hard fuck he promised. He entered her from behind slowly, but quickly ramped up his rhythm eliciting increasingly louder moans from Natalie. When Ben was about to come, he snapped his hips for one last deep thrust as he held on to his wife's hips so he could plant his seed deep within her. Their orgasms were simultaneous as usual and it felt so good. They both collapsed on the bed so they were in front of each other. They kissed each other desperately and readied themselves for more rounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lake Country in Naboo is basically Lake Como in Italy if you didn't know. Should only have a few chapters left. Please feel free to leave me some comments so I know how I did!!


	62. The One Who I Have To Say Goodbye To Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honeymoon smut continues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last day of their honeymoon part 1

It was the last full day before they were to leave Naboo.  Ben had just gotten finished with his meditation during which he spoke with Anakin.  He was standing in the doorway looking at his sleeping and well fucked wife.  Sometimes he would just get lost staring at her because he still could not believe that he had been blessed by the Force to have known her, let alone have her as his bonded life partner and mother to his children.  He knew he wouldn't have her much longer and he had come to accept it in the very short time he had known of his fate.  What his wife didn't know was that he knew the other part of the story-- Ben was to die saving Nat.  Shortly after her torment with visions and dreams, Ben started having his own.  His dreams and visions were focused on different ways of keeping Nat alive.  He always succeeded in the task because it was one of his greatest fears to have to watch as his wife died again when he could do nothing to stop it.  At the end of all his dreams and visions, he died saving her and he was at peace with it as long as she and the children were safe.  As far as Ben was concerned, Nat was the reason he had lived this long so he had no issue with sacrificing himself.     
   
Nat started to stir awake in bed as Ben was watching her from the doorway.  "Ben, why are you over there when you are supposed to be in bed with me?, " Nat said with her scratchy voice.   
   
"I was meditating while you were sleeping, baby.," Ben said as he walked toward the bed and undressed to get in bed with his wife.  He kissed her hello while he held her in his arms.     
   
They both reeked of sex, but Natalie picked up on something else on Ben's skin.  "You smell like Anakin."   
   
"What?,"  Ben questioned as he hoped this conversation was not going to go in a direction that could ruin their day.   
   
"You smell like Anakin.  It's some weird Force thing with me.  Did you see him?"   
   
"Yea, I communed with him during my meditation."   
   
"What did he want?"   
   
"Nothing important.  He knew I was here on Naboo because of the time he and grandmother spent here.  Come on, baby.  This is our last day.  We should make the most of it.  Is there anything you want to do today?"   
   
Normally Nat would chase the feeling she was having about Ben meeting with Anakin, but she didn't want to waste her time with it right now.  "We could have a picnic next to the lake.  Maybe go for a swim if the water's not to cold.  That's all I've got cause I want to spend the rest of the time with you in this bed or wherever else you want to fuck me.," Natalie said as she placed quick kisses to Ben's face, neck, chest, and arms.   
   
Ben grinned.  "That sounds wonderful to me, baby.  How about we grab some breakfast in a little bit after we practice on that last thing you were talking about?,"  Ben said as he nipped and licked at his wife's neck.   
   
Her eyes blackened and that's when it came to her.  Everything.  A flood of images in a rush--her dreams, Ben's dreams, Abeloth, Anakin.  Ben got worried for a minute, but Natalie's eyes quickly returned to their natural brown color.  "Nat, are you ok?  What happened?"   
   
"Fucking Force!! Why now of all times?"   
   
Ben was confused at first, but then he realized she knew everything. She was pulling away from him and getting out of bed.  "Nat, I'm--"   
   
"Sorry!!  How long have you known?"   
   
Ben sighed.  "I started having the visions and dreams not that long after you had yours.  It doesn't matter now.  This is the last day of our honeymoon, Nat!! Let's not waste it!! Please!!," he begged.   
   
Nat's eyes were dewy with tears, but she knew he was right.  Ben tentatively reached out his hand to touch her face as her lips trembled.  She turned her face into his hand as he caressed her cheek.  He quickly picked her up in his arms and took them back to their bed.  He pulled her close to him and kissed away the few tears that fell.  He pecked at her quivering lips until their open mouths met and they both moaned.  They continued to kiss as Ben rolled them over so Nat was straddling him.  "You been such a bad boy, Ben!  I'm going to have to punish you!"   
   
"I'm sorry.  I'll try to be better.  I'll take whatever punishment you need to give me."   
   
Natalie licked and bit at Ben's neck and when she made her way to his chest, she bit his left pectoral until he bled.  Ben inhaled and moaned as he watched Nat clean up the blood from his wound.  His dick got a bit harder and he could feel a tightening around the base of his shaft.  Now he knew he was in for it.  Nat bit his right pectoral twice until he bled.  He repeated his earlier reactions and his wife moved up to kiss him with her bloody lips.  Nat grabbed his hair tightly and Ben sooo wanted to thrust his hips, but wouldn't.  He would let Nat have control like he always did.  He was dripping with precome and he knew this was only the beginning.     
   
"I only just got started and I must say I'm impressed.  Not one peep out of you begging me to let you come.  I guess I'm going to have to work harder then.," Natalie said right next to Ben's ear.  Ben's dick got painfully harder and started to shake with need.   
   
Nat ogled Ben's body to determine where to go and what to do next.  She ran her fingers over his abs including his Bowcaster scar.  She moved to his side so she could temporarily ignore his dick.  Natalie leaned over his abdomen and bit into the flesh.  Ben wanted to touch her and she hadn't bothered to shackle his hands with the Force, but he knew touching her would likely worsen his punishment.  Natalie was lapping at the wound she made and she made to move to kiss Ben's lips while she held a tight grip on his hair.  Ben was moaning loudly.  He had to keep a lid on his thoughts because those would get him punished as well.  "Stay right where you are, Ben.," she said right next to his ear as she got up to get some antiseptic to clean up his wounds.  Natalie returned with the solution and some gauze to clean him with.  She took the supplies back and returned to him in bed.  She was visibly thinking to herself and she went for Ben's dick and balls.  His crotch was essentially soaked in precome due to her ministrations so she attempted to clean him up with her mouth starting with his balls.  She gently took them into her mouth and rolled them around.  Ben startled a bit, his eyes rolled to the back of his head, and he groaned.  His breathing was starting to become heavier.  His hands itched to touch her, but he knew he couldn't until she gave him permission. Once Ben's balls were as clean as she could manage, Natalie began to try to give Ben the best blow job ever.  Ben was increasingly desperate to come and his hips were twitching involuntarily.  "It's ok if you want to give in, Ben.  There's no shame in it.  I know you're so close.," Nat projected to his mind while she was looking at him and working his dick with her mouth, lips, tongue, and teeth like no other time before. The bed was shaking with Ben's need.     
   
"I'm doing my best work and you are not budging.  You're being really good right now, but I'm not ready to let you come.  I think you need to suffer a bit more, baby. "   
   
Natalie seated herself on Ben's leaking dick and it took everything within Ben not to roll his wife over and fuck the shit out of her.  With every movement of her on top of him, his breathing quickened and his moans got increasingly louder.  Nat rolled her hips and leaned over Ben to kiss him while she was fucking him.  Ben kissed her like he needed her to breathe which probably wasn't that far from the truth.  Nat got next to his ear again and said, " Ben, you can't hold out much longer.  It's ok.  I love you. I can help you.  Just ask me."   
   
Ben's shaking was getting out of control.  What was he waiting for?  All of a sudden he started to feel what seemed like a finger stroking his prostate.  He felt like his groin was going to explode.  "Please, baby! Please let me come!  I'll do whatever you want, Nat! Please!"   
   
Natalie couldn't resist a final dig.  "You sure, baby?  You were doing so well.," she said with a smirk as she continued to roll her hips on his dick.   
   
"Please, baby!  I have to come now!  I have to touch you!  I need it now!," Ben cried.  "Ok, you can touch my hips and ass."   
   
Ben complied while she relented and awaited further instructions.  Natalie still slow played the situation.  "Baby, you can thrust your hips into me now."  Ben complied and his hips moved to meet her.     
   
"Please?," Ben whined again waiting for Natalie to allow him to come.     
   
"Ok, Ben. I give you permission.," Natalie barely got the words out before Ben had rolled them over so that he was on top and quickly thrusting into his wife while she loudly moaned.  That phantom finger was still there stroking his prostate from the inside and it was wonderful.  When he was about to blow his wad, he slowed his thrusts to make sure that all of his seed was planted deep inside Natalie.  Both of them screamed in ecstasy when their orgasms finally hit.  Ben collapsed on his wife and they were both breathing heavily. They slowly and passionately kissed, but they were both exhausted.  "Let's take a quick nap before we get dressed for breakfast, ok?," Natalie asked.   
   
"Yes, baby.  That was --Force!  It was amazing, Nat."    
   
"Yes, it was.  More to come later?"   
   
"Yes, of course.," Ben said before a quick kiss to his wife's lips then they both fell asleep in each other's arms.   
   
   
__________________________________________________________________________  
   
   
They were both starving so they quickly showered to go to breakfast.  Honestly, that was the only reason they left the bed--the need for food.  Otherwise, they would have stayed in bed covered in each other's body fluids and working to defile each other even more. After breakfast,  they headed to the restaurant's ladies' refresher together, shut and barred the door with the Force, placed themselves in a Force bubble, and Ben fucked his wife against the refresher wall.  Natalie conveniently forgot her underwear and wore a long skirt for easy access.  They were like horny teenagers.  When they finished, Natalie stayed in the ladies' refresher to clean herself up and Ben went to the mens' refresher to do the same.  Once they put themselves together, they left the restaurant arm in arm.  They both had to laugh about the situation.  Since they had satisfied their sexual needs for the moment, they decided to take a walk along the lake where they had planned to have a picnic and a swim later.  Nat took her shoe off to dip her toes in the water and it seemed tolerable.  "We can come back in a few hours after we get some food from the restaurant or we could go to a local shop for the picnic stuff.  What do you think, Ben?"   
   
"So what are we gonna do until then, baby?," Ben said as he nibbled at Nat's ear.   
   
"What a stupid question!  You know right after we get back to the house, you're gonna be balls deep in me within 5 minutes!  On second thought, make that 2 minutes since I'm not wearing underwear."  At that, Ben picked his wife up in his arms and ran back to the villino.  He put her down to hurriedly open the door and once it was closed, they shed their clothes quickly to make their way back to the bedroom.   They slid in bed next to each other to kiss each other passionately. They both purred and moaned as they ravaged each other. It may have been a little faster than 2 minutes.

____________________________________________________________________________

 

Ben and Natalie showered and dressed to go to the local store for picnic supplies. It was walking distance from the villino and they wanted to spend at least some time being upright and civilized. When they arrived at the store, the old woman that Natalie remembered from the transport here was behind the counter. Ben went off in a different direction to find some things. "Hello, so you live here?"

"Oh no, my dear, I'm just visiting."

"My husband and I are just visiting too. We leave tomorrow. Do you know the area well?"

"I'd say not, but you enjoy your picnic, dear."

"Thank you.," Natalie said as she was turning around to find Ben before realizing she never said anything about her picnic. She turned back around to question of the old woman, but she wasn't there.

Ben came back to her. "Did you find stuff we need, Nat?"

"No, I was talking to someone, but she-uh left. Give me a few minutes and we can go." Natalie and Ben finished their shopping, paid for their items, and left for the lake picnic.

They returned to the place by the lake they had visited earlier. Ben and Natalie wore their swim clothes underneath their street clothes so they undressed and got in the water for a swim. It was tempting for them to behave badly during their time in the water, but they knew there was time for sex back at the villino. They did, however, tread water and kiss nearly the entire time they were in the lake. After their swim, they sat on a large blanket and fed each other their picnic foods. 

"It's so beautiful here, Ben. I can see why your grandparents spent so much time here. "

"Grandfather was acting as her bodyguard to protect her from political separatists while they were here, but they had actually met 10 years earlier when he was 9 and she was 14."

"Ah, so romances between older women and younger men run in the family?"

Ben grinned and then his face turned serious. "You know, he turned to the dark side to try to save her because he had visions of her death. He just ended up breaking her heart and she died in childbirth. Sometimes the Force doesn't show us everything."

"Why are you telling me this, Ben?"

"I am telling you because I don't want you risking yourself for me. Our kids need you--"

"And they don't need you?"

"Baby, it's my time. I accept it and I need you to accept it. Do not under any circumstances put your life in danger to save me. That is my job now. You and those children have been the best things in my life and my life is going to be over soon. I'll still be able to commune with you through the Force--"

"That is not the same! You are asking me to give up and you know me better than anyone! You know that I never give up!!"

"And that's why I'm telling you that I need you to this time! 

"I promise I won't put myself at risk to save you, Ben. If I can save you without risking my life, I will do it!!"

"That's all I ask, baby.," Ben said as he caressed his wife's cheek. "Now, we have some unfinished business in the bedroom, Mrs. Solo. You ready to go back to the villino?"

"Yes, Mr. Solo. Are we planning on leaving the house again or are we going to dinner tonight?"

"I have something planned for tonight and we are staying in."

"Ok, so our picnic is over?"

"Yes, Mrs. Solo. The only thing I want to eat now is you.," Ben said as he smirked.

"Your jokes are still pretty corny, but I've come to expect that and I still love you. Let's get back to bed, baby." They cleaned up their picnic trash and returned to their temporary home for another day.

______________________________________________________________________

Natalie was in the refresher getting ready for whatever Ben had planned tonight. He just told her to dress for a special occasion, so she did that and she wore underwear this time. Something smelled really good. She asked Ben if he was ready through their bond and he indicated that he was. Natalie made her way downstairs to greet Ben at the dining room. There were place settings on the table, but no Ben. "Ben?"

"Have a seat at the table and I'll be there in a minute. Would you like some wine, baby?," Ben said calling out from the kitchen.

"Yes, I would. Do you need help, Ben?"

"Nope. Just relax and have a seat, Nat."

Natalie did just that, but thought Ben was acting a bit weird. Eventually, Ben came out of the kitchen with an apron and nothing else but two wine glasses and some wine. Natalie laughed, but she was appreciative of the view. "Mr. Solo, you appear to have forgotten your clothes."

"You're right, Mrs. Solo. Would you like for me to correct that problem?"

"Who said it was a problem? Perhaps I'm the one who is overdressed."

"Oh no, this is a special dinner and you are my guest, Nat. Have a glass of wine and I'll be right back."

"Please be careful. I'd hate for you to burn anything important.," Natalie said as she followed Ben's ass with her eyes as he returned to the kitchen.

"Don't worry. I'll be fine, Nat." After a few minutes, Ben returned with 2 beautiful looking dinner plates that featured the native fowl and some local vegetables. 

"Ben, this is exquisite. When did you have time to do this?"

"The hotel staff did the shopping for me and I did the rest. This isn't all. I have dessert planned for later as well."

"Under the circumstances, I should probably be doing all this for you."

"Nat, you know I live to make you happy. That will never change. Come on, let's eat."

Ben had become a great cook. A few years ago, both of them only ate takeout. They took their time eating dinner and drinking wine. They just enjoyed each other's company. When Ben and Natalie finished their dinner, Ben cleared their plates. "So what's for dessert, baby?"

"Patience, my love." Ben returned to the kitchen and came back with a large bowl of what appeared to be chocolate mousse. 

"So I could serve this in some glasses for us or we could cover ourselves in it for dessert, which would you prefer?," Ben said with a grin as he sits at the dinner table.

"I think I'd prefer the option that involves you as a part of dessert.," Natalie says as she dips a finger into the mousse and wipes it on Ben's left nipple. She leaves her chair and puts her mouth on his mousse covered nipple. Ben runs his hand through her hair and moans as she works to clean his skin of the chocolate.


	63. The One Who I Have To Say Goodbye To Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last day of the honeymoon Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continued smut

It was just after midnight. Ben and Natalie had spent hours immersed in chocolate mousse and sex. Ben was again staring at his sleeping wife. He had gotten a few hours of sleep in, but he was now enjoying ogling Nat. It was probably odd, but it was a habit he couldn't seem to break. From time to time while he was staring, he would stroke her hair or her face but not enough to wake her. After a few minutes, Natalie stirred awake while Ben was looking at her. "Hey creepy, what's so fascinating? You watching my wrinkles set?," she said with a smile.

Ben grinned. "Stop it!! You are the most gorgeous fucking thing I've ever seen in my life, Nat.," he said as he stroked her facial scar.

"Well, I guess you haven't seen much, Mr. Solo. What else do you see when you look at me?"

"I see everything I always wanted: a home, our beautiful children, our family. I wish we had been able to meet sooner before I made so many mistakes. I wish I had been lucky enough to have us lose our virginity together. I wish I had been there when you were sick with cancer the first time. I wish I had been able to save you from Johnson. I just wish we had more time."

Natalie closed her eyes for a moment and thought she would cry, but she didn't. "When you had your first vision of me, what did you think, Ben?"

"Honestly, I thought you were so fucking hot! That one vision was my jackoff material for a week. Luke was close to catching me with my dick in my hand so many times.," Ben said as they both laughed. "What about you? What did you think of me?"

"I thought I was crazy cause I had never seen you, but I felt like I knew you. I thought you were handsome and I was so curious about how you got your scar. I thought it was just a one time thing, but it kept happening and I wasn't sure what it meant. You were in my thoughts a lot, but I tried not to put much stock in it and move on with my life. It felt foolish to wallow in my visions and dreams. I think my ex-husband picked up on my distraction. I never cheated on him, but I think maybe he felt he was secondary in my mind cause he was. I don't think I was ever really able to give myself to him fully because of you. I always felt guilty about that, but I didn't mean for it to happen."

"We're together now. That's all that matters. I know this is where we're supposed to be and that you're the one I'm supposed to be with. We still have some more honeymoon left. Let's make the most of it. " Ben slowly kissed Nat's face and neck. 

"How do we do that, Ben? We've had tons of sex. I'm not complaining because the sex has been fun and wonderful. If I have to live… without you, I need more to remember you by. Something special. Do you know what I mean?"

"I do, baby. But this whole thing stinks. I don't want to argue. We don't have to have sex. We don't even have to talk. I just want to be with you! Doing whatever. Let's just be without ascribing any particular meaning to it."

"I keep screwing this up, don't I? Looking for romantic gestures and storybook fantasies. I'm sorry. This isn't just about me. I've been so selfish--," Natalie said before Ben cuts her off with a soft kiss to her lips. 

"No more talking, out loud anyway.," Ben projects through their bond. He continues to softly kiss Nat and then stops to look in her eyes. "You're so beautiful, Nat. I don't tell you enough.," he said again through their bond.

"Yes, you do. I don't get tired of hearing it. When you look at me, I know you love me. You're beautiful to me too, Ben. I know I don't say it enough.," Natalie communicates through their bond while she runs her hands through Ben's hair. "Ben, make me a promise."

"About what?"

"If I manage to save you against all odds, I want you to cut your hair."

"Why? You love my hair."

"I love the texture and feel of it, but it's too long. You don't need to hide under your hair anymore!"

Ben thought about it for a moment. "I promise if you can keep me alive, I will cut my hair. We're not talking bald, right?"

"No, even I would hate that. Just not so long. Wow, you really are attached to that hair, aren't you? Your loving wife asks you to cut it and you have to think about it??"

"Baby, if you wanted me to go bald, I would! Have you noticed I really can't deny you anything, woman? I'm the definition of pussy-whipped.," Ben said through their bond while he smiled then nipped and licked at Nat's ear. 

"Well, I'm ad-dick-ted to you if you haven't noticed.," Natalie said as she stroked Ben's scar and smiled.

"So my puns and humor have rubbed off on you?"

"That's not the only thing that's rubbed off on me."

"Mrs. Solo, are you up for a couple rounds of sex now?"

"Maybe more than a couple. You're so sexy, Ben. I can't resist you. No matter how tired I am, how mad I am, how anything I am. I always want you inside me. It makes me feel….complete somehow."

"I feel exactly the same, baby. We've tried to explain what can't be explained so let's stop trying. Let's get lost in each other while we still have time. Please?," Ben said before he started again with slow kisses to Natalie's face and neck. When it was all said and done, there wasn't much that she denied Ben either. 

Ben found his way back to Natalie's mouth. They stared at each other for a moment before their lips met and they kissed passionately. Their hands roamed each other's bodies. The bedroom was quiet except for their heavier breathing and moaning. 

Ben tore his mouth away for Natalie's mouth to nip, lick, and kiss at her neck and chest while his hand stroked her skin. He could always feel the difference in her when he moved from her neck to her scarred chest. "Everything about you is beautiful to me, Nat. You said not to hide anymore. You don't need to hide from me. I love you….so much.," Ben communicated through their bond. He felt her body relax and her hand carded through his hair as he continued his ministrations. 

He slowly moved down to her abdomen to appreciate it as he had the other areas of her body paying close attention to her C-section scar. Ben rubbed his face in her pubic hair to immerse himself in her scent. Natalie moaned at his actions then got louder when his tongue touched her clit. Ben slowly bathed her clit in his saliva and he slurped and sucked at her clit as she started to get wet. Nat's hands tightened in his hair. Her hips twitched as Ben remained focused on his work. Filthy sex noises echoed in the room. 

Ben increased the pace of his licking and sucking. He knew she was close. "Say my name, please. I need to hear you.," Ben said continuing their mental communication. Natalie's breath was caught in her throat. She probably couldn't speak out loud if she wanted to. Right as she was on the precipice of her orgasm, she screamed through their bond, "Ben, I love you!" They came together as they always did and Ben moved up to kiss her with his sex stained lips and mouth. They rolled over in bed so Natalie was on top straddling him. She started to stroke his dick slowly while he groaned with pleasure. 

Natalie moved down to Ben's dick to pleasure him more fully. She teased the head with her tongue and slowly worked her way down to his balls. She cleaned his balls of sweat and come before she took them into her mouth. Ben startled a bit, but sharply inhaled and moaned in appreciation. Natalie returned to give his dick similar attention. Ben thought he could come from the sounds of her slurping, how beautiful she looked worshipping him, the feel of her hair in his hand, and the smell and taste of their sex, but he didn't. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes to revel in this experience. Ben felt his tip hit the back of his wife's throat and felt her fingertips at the edge of his Bowcaster scar. When he knew he was on the precipice of his orgasm, he tightened his grip on her hair and thrusted his hips before he spilled down her throat. After she swallowed his seed, Natalie made her way up to Ben's mouth to kiss him. 

They lingered at each other's mouths for a bit before Ben seated his wife on his dick. Natalie slowly moved away from his mouth to roll her hips. Ben caressed her face with his hand and placed his thumb in her mouth. She treated his thumb as if it was his dick. "You love the idea of being able to fuck me in two holes at the same time, don't you?," she said with a laugh through their bond.

"I'll take whatever I can get from you at this point, Mrs. Solo.," Ben responded through their bond as he smirked. 

"So greedy."

"I always want more of you, baby." Ben turned them over so he was on top. He fucked into her slowly while he looked into her eyes. He removed his thumb from her mouth and used his other hand to stroke her angelic face. "You're so beau--"

"Don't say that!"

"Why?"

"Because every time you say it, it sounds like goodbye!"

"You know it's not, but I need to say it to you. You need to hear it from me. We can say anything to each other, even the things we don't want to hear and don't want to say. In a way, we've been saying goodbye to each other all week."

"I know, but can we just forget about it for now, Ben?," Natalie said as tears came to her eyes. 

"I'm sorry, baby. I can't stand it when you cry. It makes me feel like I failed you.," Ben said as he started to tear up as well. 

"You haven't failed me. This isn't your fault. It's just life and I'm having a hard time with it. I can't help it because I love you so much.," Natalie said as she kissed and wiped his tears away. 

"You know I love you too. I just need to show you, tell you, and have as much of you as I can. Just let me.," Ben said before he kissed her hungrily and increased the rhythm of his fucking. Natalie wrapped her legs around his waist and held on for the ride. They could both hear the wet slapping sounds of their sex and it increased their arousal. Their breathing got more heavy and their moans got louder. When their orgasms hit, they continued to kiss as Ben thrusted into Natalie as deeply as he could and she clenched around him as tightly as she could. They were soaked in sweat, tears, and sex, but they readied themselves for more. They took each other on every free surface in the villino for the next few hours with no thoughts of needing to sleep or saying goodbye for the last time.


	64. The One Who May Not Be Able to Save Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Natalie leave Naboo. WIll their dreams and visions come true?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of angst!!

Ben and Natalie got on the transport to leave Naboo. They sat in their seats and just held each other in silence. They were exhausted and at this point, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. They walked to Ben's ship and Natalie got on to go to the bedroom while Ben did his preflight checks. He triple checked everything just to be sure before he got them into the air, left the planet, and set the autopilot before joining Nat in the bedroom. She was wide awake and waiting for him so they could try to take a nap together. They settled in bed with Ben holding Nat from behind in his arms tightly. He kissed her hair and shoulders before they both fell asleep. 

About an hour into their flight, a proximity warning went off in the cockpit. Ben got up to check it out while Natalie remained asleep. It looked like the remnants of a ship was in their path. It hadn't been there on their way to Naboo. Ben tried to plot a course around the fuselage, but it was difficult because there were so many pieces even with his piloting skills. A piece of the debris managed to hit the ship, but the hull remained intact. Shortly after the hit, the fuel warning started blaring. 

"Ben, what's going on?"

"Baby, we've got to land! Strap yourself in to this seat now!!," Ben said as he hurriedly tried to find a planet for them to land on. He found a planet that was habitable to land on that he wasn't familiar with. They had no other choice. He set a course for the planet but he could hear the hull starting to open up. He used the Force to try to keep the integrity of the hull in place. 

"Brace yourself, Nat!!"

Ben couldn't slow their approach and the hull was breached once they entered the atmosphere. He tried to pick the best place he could to land. He needed to focus so he could keep Nat out of danger. The landing was hard and the ship slid for a while before coming to a halt. 

Ben awoke first. He was still securely fastened in his pilot's chair with some blood in his mouth and running down his head. Otherwise, he seemed ok. He quickly unfastened himself from the chair and he saw Nat slumped over, but still fastened in her chair. He could see that she was bleeding from her head as well. 

"Nat, baby, wake up!," Ben said as he quickly checked her for injuries before he unfastened her from the chair. When he was sure she wasn't obviously injured, Ben unfastened her from the seat and laid her on the floor of the ship. He stroked her face nervously. "Nat, please, wake up!!"

Natalie stirred awake slowly with her eyes blinking and rolling her eyes. "Ben, you…you're still…with me?"

"I'm still here, baby. How do you feel?"

"My head hurts. I'm sick to my stomach. The light…."

"You're concussed, Nat. We've got to find a way off the planet so we can get you some help.," Ben said as he grimaced from some rib pain. 

"We need…uh….we need the first aid kit…rations and water. Did you try the….uh…comms?," Natalie said as she tried to focus on the present goings-on.

"Baby, just rest. I'll get everything and then we can leave the ship.," Ben said as he went to the pilot's chair to see if he could get anyone on the comms. They were totally dead. His ribs were really starting to bother him and it was getting harder for him to take a complete breath. He needed to focus on keeping Nat safe. He could worry about himself later. He gathered up the first aid kit, rations, and water and returned to Nat.

"Nat, can you walk?"

"I think I can, just not very fast. Do you know where we are, Ben?"

"Not really. I've never been here before. It's about an hour and a half away from Naboo. Hopefully, that helps whoever's gonna rescue us."

"Can you contact Luke from here?"

"I can try.," Ben said as he sat on the floor to try to reach out to Luke in the Force. 

"Ben, are you ok?," Luke projects through their bond.

"Uncle, thank the Force! Nat and I crash landed on a planet about a hour and a half away from Naboo. Can you get in touch with Hux so he can send us help?"

"Of course, is Natalie ok?"

"She's got a concussion, but I think she's otherwise ok."

"Ben, I sense you're hurt. What's wrong?"

"Uncle, don't worry about me! Nat is the priority! I need you to promise me that she'll make it home to our kids. Tell mom I'm sorry. Please, I need you to do these things for me!"

"Ben, does Natalie know what's happening to you?"

"Uncle, please I need you to promise me!"

"I promise, Ben. Hold on until help arrives. May the Force be with you.," Luke said before he closed their bond. 

"Uncle Luke is gonna contact Hux for help. We should stay with the ship so it'll be easier for them to find us.," Ben said before he had a coughing spell which ended with some blood being expelled from his mouth.

"Ben, what's wrong?"

"I'm fine, baby. Don't worry about me!"

"You're coughing up blood which means you're not fine. Does your chest hurt? Could you have broken some ribs?"

"Nat, help is coming so-soon…," Ben starts having another coughing fit and coughs up even more blood. His breathing becomes a lot more difficult.

Natalie starts removing Ben's shirt and notices that he has some ugly bruising on both sides of his chest. "Oh, Ben…you need surgery right away. Hux's people won't get here in time!"

"Nat, we talked about this! Don't put yourself at risk for me! Please!" Ben continues with his intermittent coughing up of blood and his shortness of breath is getting much worse. 

"We don’t have to talk out loud anymore, Ben. Just rest yourself, ok? Try to slow down your breathing if you can. The more you breathe, the harder your heart will work, and your lungs will fill with blood quicker.," Natalie said through their bond as tears came to her eyes.

Ben was clearly struggling with his breathing. He started to calm when Natalie stroked his facial scar. His mouth was starting to dry which he knew meant that his lungs were filled with blood. Natalie moved so that Ben could rest against her while she had her back to the wall. She ran her hand through his hair and kissed it. "Just think of some good things, Ben. Just remember the first time we made love, our wedding day, when our children were born, our honeymoon…," Natalie said as her tears streamed down her face. 

Ben had tears in his eyes too. "I'm sorry, Nat, I---," Ben weakly attempts through their bond. 

"There's nothing for you to be sorry about, Ben. You protected me. You're a good husband and father. You did your job, baby. Just rest, ok?" He was breathing more than 30 times a minute now. She knew he wouldn't have much longer. 

Ben had a horrible coughing spell and he coughed up quite a bit of blood. His respiratory rate jumped up drastically. "I want to see your face, Nat. Lay me on the floor on my back." Natalie obliged him. They both knew that he would drown in his own blood in this position. His death was imminent.

While Ben was on his back, Natalie kneeled beside him. He reached up to touch her facial scar. Both of their faces were soaked in tears. "Mrs. Solo, you were the best thing that ever happened to me. I'll be with you always. I was lucky that you loved me.," Ben said, speaking through their bond even though he was struggling. 

Natalie could feel his pain heavily through their bond. She reached for the first aid kit to give him some morphine to ease his suffering. The injection gave him some relief and his breathing started to ease some. Natalie took out the stethoscope from the first aid kit and listened intently to Ben's lungs. If she had to guess, he probably had about a liter of blood in his lungs. He was barely moving any air at all and all of the lobes of his lungs were affected. Anyone else would probably be dead already. Natalie returned back to the first aid kit to find some chest tubes and a scalpel. Ben was still with her barely. She kept the things she would need to maintain his airway nearby just in case. Natalie gave Ben a little more morphine for pain cause she didn't think she had time to inject numbing medication at each chest tube site. She raised both of his arms above his head, put a pillow under his shoulder blades, put on the sterile gloves, and used sterile technique to prepare to place the chest tubes, but she knew Ben would need a shitload of antibiotics if he made it through this.

Natalie worked on the right side of his chest first being careful to avoid the veins, arteries, and nerves of Ben's ribs. She used the scalpel to enter his chest and carefully put her finger in only as deeply as she needed the tube to be placed. Once the tube was in, she put in quick stitches to hold it in place and attached the tube to a drain. She then repeated the same actions on the left side of his chest. Natalie took the stethoscope and listened to each lobe of Ben's lungs. There was marked improvement, but he wasn't out of the woods yet. He desperately needed surgery to stop the bleeding. If that didn't happen then the work she had done to save him meant nothing. 

"Ben, how are you feeling?"

"I feel a lot better. Thank you, Nat."

"Don't thank me yet. You still need to go under the knife. We're not out of the woods yet, baby."

"How's your head, Nat?"

"Honestly, it really hurts, but I can't think about that right now. I have to watch over you. Are you in pain or any discomfort at all, baby?"

"I'm ok, more than ok. I'm still with you." Natalie strokes his facial scar and he does the same to her. 

"Rest, baby. Just rest." They sat quietly with calming feelings permeating their bond from both sides. After a while, Natalie rechecked Ben's lungs with a stethoscope and he seemed to be doing fine. She went about cleaning his face, neck, and chest of blood. When she finished, Natalie carded her hand through Ben's hair appreciating his features and realizing how close she came to being without them in the flesh. Having him as a Force ghost would not have been the same. "I guess I have to cut my hair now as promised."

"I won't hold you to it, Ben. I'd much rather have you with long hair than not at all." 

In the distance, Natalie could hear some vehicles headed toward them. "It sounds like someone's here for us. Lemme go and see if I can direct them here. I'll be right back." She left the ship to guide the rescue party to Ben's ship. The medical team got him prepared to leave on their vessel and gave her the once over before they left for the new government's complex which was really the old provisional government complex. Hux and Poe met them at the medical team's vessel to make sure that they were taken care of. Once they got to the med bay, they prepared to take Ben to surgery. Natalie kissed him quickly before the surgeon took him to the operating room. Once Natalie was fully assessed, they diagnosed her with a concussion as she and Ben had suspected. They prescribed rest, but they would follow her closely for any complications. Hux arranged for some quarters for her and he walked her to them. "I wish we were seeing each other under different circumstances, Natalie. Are you ok?"

"I'm just tired and worried about Ben. Can you wake me when I can see him after he gets out of surgery?"

"Of course, sleep well."

Natalie laid on the bed and fell asleep almost immediately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the medical jargon!!


	65. The One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben recovers. Natalie and Ben get surprised again, and Natalie has trouble dealing with it. Anakin fucks up and everyone lets him know it. Ben and Natalie visit an old friend?? An unexpected visitor from the past returns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is quite busy and long. Sorry in advance, but I think it pays off!

Hux and Poe woke Natalie up 4 hours later. They both walked with her to see Ben in his hospital room. "You know, our trauma surgeon says that was some of the best field medicine he's ever seen from anyone and from someone with a concussion no less. You never cease to amaze me, Natalie.," Hux said. 

"Hux, I just did what I had to do to save the man I love. I'm sure you and Poe would do the same for each other. So, when's the wedding?"

"It's still too busy right now. Maybe we should just elope and worry about a ceremony later.," Poe said. 

"Just remember, the marriage is more important than the ceremony. You'll know when it's right."

As they finished their conversation, they arrived at Ben's room. The doctor was still there and talking to Ben. Natalie made a beeline for Ben to gently kiss his lips as he carded his hand through her hair. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, baby. The doctor was just about to tell me how long they want to keep me here."

"Mrs. Solo, it is a pleasure to meet you. Your field work gave us the time we needed to save your husband's life. I expect that he should be healed within a week with bacta treatments. We'll be following him closely. Please call on me should you have any questions. Again, it was a pleasure."

"Thank you, doctor."

After the doctor left, Hux and Poe visited for a bit. "Hux, Poe, thank you for saving us. We're eternally grateful.," Ben said.

"So you guys crashed on the way home from a honeymoon in Naboo? What happened?," Poe said.

"My ship encountered the remnants of a craft that was floating in space. I tried to avoid it, but we got hit by a piece of it. It nearly tore a hole in the hull and we lost a ton of fuel so I had no choice but to land on that planet."

"So how was Naboo? We need some honeymoon ideas.," Hux said.

"What we saw of it was beautiful.," Natalie said with a smirk as she looked at Ben who grinned. "We went to the Lake Country and stayed in a villino for a week. I think you both would enjoy it."

"We'll definitely keep it in mind. Well, it was good to see you both. I'm sure you're both exhausted. Hux and I have a ton of work to do before the day's end so we'll leave you and see you for breakfast tomorrow."

Both Hux and Poe hugged Natalie and shook Ben's hand before they left the hospital room.

"Baby, are you in pain? Tired?"

"Yes and yes, but I want you to sit with me for a while until I fall asleep, ok?"

"Of course, Mr. Solo. Your wish is my command."

"How's your head, Nat?"

"It still hurts a little, but it's getting better. I just need some rest like you. I'll stay until you fall asleep and then I'll go to my quarters to sleep.," Natalie said then she stared at Ben before some tears came to her eyes. 

"Baby, we're safe now, we're fine."

"Are we? Force, it's always something, Ben! Once we get settled, something or someone comes for us. I feel like we never get a break!"

"I know, but there's no one else I want to go through this life with, baby. It's a crazy life, but it would be worse if we didn't have each other, right?"

"Yes, Mr. Solo. Come on, you rest now.," Natalie stroked Ben's face and hair until he went to sleep. 

"I love you, baby. Good night." Natalie left the hospital room and made a beeline for her quarters and she passed out before her head hit the pillow.

 

______________________________________________________________________________

It was the day before Ben would likely be cleared by his surgeon to leave the hospital. He and Natalie had met with Hux and Poe everyday for meals. Today, Nat was acting slightly weird. She had been complaining of being tired and nauseous for the last few days. Today, she finished 3 plates of breakfast food. Then she finished off Ben's, Hux's, and Poe's leftovers. "Baby, are you ok?," Ben said.

"I'm just really hungry today. I'm fine.," Natalie said as she continued to stuff her face.

"Nat, you only eat like this when you're preg--nant.," Ben said casually until he realized the consequences of what he said.

Hux and Poe stayed silent. Everyone was focused on Natalie. Her face blanched "Hmmm, no that's not…hmmmm. I need to go!!"

"Where are you going, Nat?"

"Med bay!," she yelled as she practically ran away.

"Ben, should you go after her?," Poe said.

"Yes, I should, but there's no way that she's pregnant. She just had a hysterectomy a few months ago. She wasn't even supposed to be able to…hmmm……..uhhhh. I gotta go to the med bay!!"

Ben met Natalie in the med bay. The staff confirmed she was about 3 weeks pregnant, likely with twins….again. Ben and Natalie were both beside themselves. Ben knew they needed to talk about this, but Natalie disappeared on him. 

Ben returned to his hospital room and later the doctor came to see him to let him know he could leave tomorrow. It had been hours since he had seen his wife after they learned about her pregnancy. He was starting to worry. Hux and Poe came by his room to check on him. 

"I'm sure she's fine, Ben. She probably just needed some time to process this.," Poe said.

"It's definitely not like her to just leave and not say where she was going, but Poe is probably right, Ben."

"It would just make me feel better if I at least knew where she was even if she won't talk to me right now. Can you guys just let me know if the cameras or security people see her? "

"Of course, Ben. Try to get some rest. We'll meet both of you for breakfast in the morning.," Hux said before he and Poe left.

Ben knew Nat hadn't closed their bond, but she wasn't responding to his attempts to communicate. Hux and Poe were probably right. She just needed some time. 

__________________________________________________________________________________

Natalie had Force folded back to the planet she and Ben had crash landed on. She wasn't quite sure why she'd done it, but she was here. She got back on the crashed ship to find their things. They weren't hard to find and they were relatively unharmed by the crash surprisingly. She was about to leave the ship when she saw Ben's blood on the floor. She had come so close to losing him and she was wasting her time here pissed off that she was pregnant with their 4th and 5th children. The Force just loved fucking with her and showing her who's boss!! She felt like her life wasn't hers anymore. The Force had brought her Ben and her children, but what had she lost? Before all this, she had been able to depend on herself even if she couldn't depend on any one else. But she wasn't truly happy before without Ben and the children. So did the Force know better? Did she just need to give herself over to it? 

She grabbed their things and Force folded to Naboo's Lake Country. She sat by the lake where she and Ben had their picnic last week. She missed Ben so much. She could feel him trying to connect with her through their bond, but she had been ignoring it. Natalie didn't want to vomit her feelings and frustrations all over him. That would just make things worse. She was so conflicted about this pregnancy and that wasn't fair to these babies or Ben. 

"I see you came back, my dear." It was the old woman she had seen a few times during their visit here last week.

"Are you ever going to show me your true form, Abeloth?"

"Probably not. Why are you here moping about instead of with your husband, Natalie? You solved your unsolvable problem!"

"Yes, I did! Now I have another! I'm pregnant with twins again! The Force grew back my womb! Was that you?"

"No, it wasn't. You are unhappy with this?"

"I'm just thrilled!! I'm nearly 50 and I had a hysterectomy! If I wanted more children, I would have kept my womb! Except I nearly died with my last pregnancy and I actually did die with my first twin pregnancy after telling my husband that there was no way I could get pregnant! Not to mention that I would love to be able to have amazing sex with my husband without worrying about getting pregnant!!"

"I see. I assure you the Force does nothing without purpose. The children must be very important for the Force to have gone through all the trouble. I appreciate it is very inconvenient for you and Ben, but it appears it is necessary. I'm sure you and Ben can find a way to deal with this. Embrace your destiny and your roles in the galaxy. May the Force be with you.," Abeloth said before fading away.

Even though she wasn't surprised by what Abeloth said, Natalie felt better about things now. She needed to talk to Ben now. She gathered their things and Force folded back to his hospital room. He was asleep in his hospital bed. She set their things down and sat next to his bed. She hated to wake him, but she knew he had been worried about her. She stroked his facial scar and Ben stirred awake.

"Thank the Force! Nat, are you ok?"

"I'm ok, baby. I'm sorry I handled the news about the pregnancy so badly. It wasn't right for me to leave and not tell you where I was going. I just needed some time. How are you dealing with it?"

"Nat, I was shocked about the babies, but I was honestly worried about you! You're the one who has to carry them and I can only do so much to make things easier for you. I'll follow your lead like I always do."

"I love you and I'm sorry this is so hard for me. If you think about it, I've been pregnant for most of our relationship! What about you? You're gonna be married with 5 kids before 35! And we're gonna need Leia's help I'm sure. This is just so not where I thought we'd be."

"Nat, I know we'll be fine if we can just count on each other. I have all the faith in the world in us!," Ben said before his stroked Natalie's facial scar and kissed her lips. 

______________________________________________________________________________

Ben and Natalie had breakfast with Hux and Poe the next day. Hux and Poe had procured them another ship that met Ben's rigorous specifications. After some goodbyes, thank yous, and congratulations, Ben and Natalie left the planet to return to their Seattle home. They told Leia and the kids of their news. They were all excited about the new babies. Leia was due to start her treatments the following week. Ben and Natalie alternated accompanying her to them and she did very well. Dr. Lofaso gave Leia a good bill of health after a month of treatments and she would only need to return if she started to feel bad. 

Ben, Natalie, and the kids took Leia back to her home with the completion of her treatments. They would be back to get her so she could help them out before Natalie would inevitably be forced to be on bedrest when her pregnancy becomes more advanced. Ben, Xander, and Lexi took wonderful care of Natalie and Bella when they needed to. 

Once Natalie hit 5 months, she started to slow down a little bit sooner than she had with her previous pregnancies so Ben decided to call on his mom for help earlier than they had predicted they would need it. 

"Baby, I'm sorry I have to count on you more. I get tired so fast now."

"Nat, don't worry. I have it covered. We're gonna pick my mom up next week. Hux and Poe are gonna set us up at the government complex so you can deliver there. Everything is arranged. How are you feeling?," Ben said as he was giving his pregnant wife a full body massage in their Force bubble protected bedroom. 

"I feel very relaxed thanks to you."

"You feel up to being serviced by the Prince tonight?"

"I do, Mr. Solo. Does the Prince mind that I'm not as mobile as I have been in the past?"

"Oh no, Mrs. Solo. The Prince will take whatever he can get at this point."

"Have I been neglecting you, Ben?"

"No, you haven't. Between us both being tired all the time and keeping up with the kids, baby, it's just been difficult. I've probably been neglecting you.," Ben said before he starts to kiss his wife's hair and shoulders while he caresses his wife's pregnant stomach.

"We could try it with me on top if you're up for it, Ben."

"Ok, gimme a minute." Ben laid on the bed so he was on his back and lifted his pregnant wife up so she could straddle him. Natalie leaned down to kiss her husband while Ben caressed her hips and ass. They both moaned with satisfaction. "Umm, I missed you so much, baby."  
Natalie played with Ben's nipples until they peaked and then she licked at them. She sat up and reached behind her to stroke Ben's dick and balls. 

"Aaahh, I wanna fuck you so hard, Nat." 

"Lift me up and put me on your dick, baby!" Ben complied and they started fucking each other slowly at first. They increased their rhythm and they could both feel the babies going crazy. 

"Should we stop, Nat, until they calm down?"

"No, keep going! I'm so close!" Ben tried to keep going, but it just felt weird. "Baby, I have to stop until they calm down."

"Ok, I don't have to be on top! You can just fuck me from behind! Please!" Ben lifted his wife off his dick and moved to fuck her from behind. Nat was so warm and wet. He was easily able to get back into his rhythm and she moved to meet him. After a few more thrusts, they both screamed in ecstasy. 

"More, please, Ben? I need you!" He touched Natalie's belly and the babies were still going crazy. "Baby, are you---"

"Yes, I'm fucking sure! Fuck me now!" Ben obliged her and fucked her from behind until they both came again. The babies calmed down and Natalie practically threw Ben down on the bed so she could mount him again. This was the horniest Nat had ever been during any of her pregnancies. Ben was loving it. She was almost literally holding him down while she was fucking him. They kissed deeply and moaned loudly. Within minutes, they were both coming again. They went for a few more rounds until they fell asleep. 

___________________________________________________________________________________

The next morning when Natalie was waking, she noticed her face was wet. She wiped a few times at it and when she opened her eyes, she could see blood that had come from her nose. Ben felt her stirring and he jumped into action to get her a washcloth. "What happened? Did you have a headache?"

"I don't know. I just woke up and found myself like this. I never had a headache."

They finished cleaning her face and got ready for the day. Ben cooked breakfast and Natalie went to help get her 3yr olds to the table before she grabbed Bella to make sure she got fed. 

"Morning, Mommy.," Xander and Lexi both said.

"Hi, munchkins.," Natalie said as she hugged them. "You guys ready for breakfast?"

"Yes, Mommy. Your friend, the blue man, came to see us last night.," Lexi said.

"The blue man?"

"Breakfast is ready, guys!," Ben said as he came back to hurry the twins along.

"Ben, the kids were telling me about a blue man that came to visit them last night. His name wasn't Anakin, was it?"

"Yes, that was his name, Mommy. He seemed nice. He said he would see us again soon," Xander said.

"He did, did he? Kids, let's get you some breakfast. Mommy and Daddy need to talk with Anakin while you guys are doing that, ok?"

Ben and Natalie set the kids up with their breakfast at the kitchen table. They both headed to the gym and locked the door behind them. Ben and Natalie called out to Anakin, Abeloth, and any other Force beings who could be listening. By the time Ben and Natalie reached the track and mats downstairs, many had appeared to have answered their calls. Natalie focused her attentions on Anakin Skywalker. "You came to visit my children last night! Why?"

"I just wanted to see how they've progressed."

"You have no right to visit them without talking to Ben or I first!!"

"You both know I mean no harm. I am their great grandfather after all."

Natalie walked toward Anakin and stopped in front of him. "Perhaps I over-reacted. Forgive me, Anakin. Let's shake hands in the spirit of friendship."

"My child, I---," Anakin froze as Natalie, with blackened eyes, touched his arm. He became corporeal and he started to choke. 

Ben was in shock and he was hard. Luckily, he was wearing a shirt long enough to cover himself.

"Anakin, if you ever pull this punk ass shit again and visit any of my children again without speaking to either Ben or myself first, I will fucking pull you out of the Force myself and murder you! If you weren't family, I would have done it already! Are we clear?," Natalie said as Anakin nodded. 

Natalie released him and Anakin returned to his usual Force ghost appearance. Natalie and Ben made their way back up from the gym to their children. 

"Wonder why you were not chosen for the Jedi Council, you should not.," Yoda said to Anakin in his trademark style.

"Perhaps if I'd chopped off your head and not your legs, I'd have saved the galaxy of your foolishness, Anakin.," Obi-Wan quipped as he twirled his moustache.

"Skywalkers. You are a hard headed lot, aren't you?," Abeloth said with a smile.

The commotion died down and the Force beings returned to their realms.

When Ben and Natalie arrived back upstairs, Natalie pulled Ben to the side and kissed him. "Baby, why don't you do something about the Prince while I make sure the kids are ok?"

Ben smiled and agreed while he returned to their bedroom. He didn't need to embarrass himself in front of their children right now. Natalie grabbed herself a plate and sat with her twins to eat breakfast. After a few minutes, Ben and Bella came out of the bedroom to join everyone else for breakfast. After breakfast, Natalie got the kids dressed and tried to prepare some things for their upcoming trip back to Ben's time. 

___________________________________________________________________________________

Ben and Natalie were sound asleep in bed after more marathon pregnant sex. Natalie was awoken by a pounding at the front of her head. She was sick to her stomach. The pain was so bad that she was crying out loud waking up Ben. "Nat, what's wrong?"

"It's my head! It hurts so bad, Ben!" Ben got out of bed and got her some over the counter meds and water to see if that would help. Once Nat took the meds, she relaxed more, but she still had so much pain. Ben tried massaging her to help and she slowly felt a little better. "We need to see someone for this in the morning, Nat! We can't wait, ok?"

"I'll call Neal. He can arrange for the scan and read it tomorrow for me."

Ben hated Neal Pearce, but he'd do anything to find out what was going on with Nat. Ben was able to get Nat back to sleep and he soon followed. They got up early to call Twitch for babysitting duty so they could meet with Neal. Neal had arranged for Nat to have an MRI of the brain and they were to meet him in his office for the reading and results. 

Neal's receptionist greeted Ben and Natalie when they entered his office. "Dr. Pearce is in his office reviewing your scan, Natalie. Just give him a few minutes, ok?"

"I'd like to see Dr. Pearce after he's done for a few minutes alone, please?," Ben said to his receptionist.

"I'll let him know, Mr. Solo." Natalie looked at Ben and he knew she was concerned. He projected to her that he just wanted to talk with Neal and that he would not hurt him. He just wanted to make sure that they had an understanding. After 20 minutes, the receptionist let Ben know that Neal was ready to see him. She led him back to Neal's office. "Ben, have a seat please."

"I'll stand for now, Neal. I wanted to thank you for the help you gave my mom. She's doing very well."

"I'm glad to have helped, but I know the real reason you wanted to see me, Ben. I apologized to Natalie for how…..I treated her. I owe you an apology as well. I am sorry for how I behaved, but I will always care about Natalie. Even though I will never have the chance to be with her, I hope that you can be the type of man she deserves. If I ever hear that you've hurt her, you will answer to me."

Ben, for some reason, had gotten used to hearing these threats from plenty of people in regards to him ever hurting his wife. Hearing it from this man that he had so much contempt for was surprising, but it was a testament to how much people loved Nat. "I hear you, Neal. If you even look at my wife sideways, I'll give you the beating I wanted to give you when we first met, deal?"

"Deal!," Neal said as he extended his hand to Ben to shake it and Ben accepted. They both sat in office chairs and Neal asked his receptionist to call Natalie into his office so they could review hew test results. Natalie was glad no blows had been exchanged and she took her place in Neal's office beside her husband. Neal knew Natalie was pregnant again because the radiology staff had reported it to him, but seeing it with his own eyes had somehow closed the door on any hopes he still had a chance with Natalie. Neal cleared his throat. "So….you've been having headaches again?"

"I had a really bad one this morning and I had a nosebleed the night before."

"Well, I'm pleased to tell you that your MRI is completely negative. No signs of anything whatsoever. If I can refer you to anyone else, let me know. Natalie, if you ever need anything else, please call on me. Ben, take care of her. She deserves it."

"Thank you, Neal. Take care of yourself." Ben and Natalie bid Neal goodbye and left his office to return to their home. 

Twitch met them at the elevator with Bella in his arms and the twins at either side of him. "Everything's all good, right darling?," Twitch said as Ben took Bella from his arms and the twins followed their father back to their room. 

"Twitch, I'm fine. Thanks for coming on short notice. We had some scary stuff happen and we didn't want to take any chances."

"So how was Dr. Pearce?"

"He was fine."

"You know he's still in love with you, right?," Ben said as he returned to the room after laying all the kids down for naps. 

"He knows he has to move on now."

"Let me guess. It was the pregnant belly that did it.," Twitch said with a smirk.

"Neal will be just fine. We all have other things to worry about. Twitch, we need you to take care of this place again for us. We're gonna be gone until after I have these babies."

"I've got you covered, honey. Just don't come back pregnant again. You're gonna need a bigger place!" 

"It's Ben's fault, Twitch! He finds me irresistible!," Natalie said.

"Baby, the fact that I find you irresistible is your fault.," Ben said as he moved toward his wife to kiss her quickly. 

"Ok, that's my queue. Have a pleasant trip, my lovelies. I'll hold down the fort.," Twitch said before he kissed Nat on the cheek and shook Ben's hand before he got on the elevator to leave. 

"It's been a long day already. I'm gonna take a nap. You coming?"

"Of course, I'm gonna massage you until you go to sleep like always." They made their way to the bedroom to sleep like their children did. 

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

After they picked up Leia, they made their way to the new government complex to get settled in their quarters. Natalie was fast approaching 6 months pregnant and would likely be on bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy. Ben and Leia were going to have their hands full with Xander, Lexi, and Bella. 

A few days after they settled in at the complex, Ben and Natalie were to meet with the specialist that would be caring for her until her delivery. Hux had arranged for the best OB/GYN in the galaxy to handle Natalie's case.

Dr. Nasir Kestnor was renowned for his work in the field and a lot more than appropriately enamored of himself. Ben and Hux were very impressed with him and normally Natalie would be too. There was something off about him to her. He smelled weird to her. Not like someone who didn't practice good hygiene, but something that her Force senses were irritated by. Natalie didn't say much during their meeting and she declined to shake the man's hand which was not like her. Ben and Hux shook the doctor's hand and the doctor bid everyone goodnight.

"Nat, are you ok?"

"I'm not sick if that's what you mean, Ben."

"Natalie, you were rude to him. That man came a long way to do this for us. You could have at least shook the man's hand!," Hux said.

"I don't like him. I know it sounds crazy, but I'm not gonna let him touch me. Find someone else."

Ben and Hux were flabbergasted. "He's the best in his field! There is no one better."

"I didn't say find someone better, just someone else!"

"Why don't you like him, Nat?"

"There's just something off about him, Ben. You can't feel it, too?"

"He seemed fine to me. You're used to dealing with doctor's egos. This can't be any different for you."

"It wasn't that. Look, this is my body and I don't care what either of you say! Fucking just find someone else!," Natalie said before she stormed out to go to their quarters. When she got to their quarters, Natalie undressed and got in the shower. She wasn't trying to be difficult. She had gotten very far by trusting her instincts and she wouldn't stop now. It was awkward, but she'd never forgive herself if she went against her instincts and something went wrong. All of a sudden, she felt a stabbing pain in her head and her nose started to bleed. Natalie was able to control the bleeding and the pain subsided before she left the shower. When she left the refresher, Ben was there waiting. 

"I'm sorry, Nat. We'll get someone else that you like to help us with the delivery. Hux will get back to us tomorrow. Are you alright?"

"I had another nosebleed and headache, but it's gone now."

"That's not the reason why you don't want Kestnor, is it?"

"No, Ben! One thing has nothing to do with the other. I don't like him! It's that simple!"

"Ok, baby. I'm just trying to help. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, Ben. I'm tired and I want to go to bed."

"I'll meet you in a bit after I shower, ok.," Ben said as he stroked his wife's face and kissed her cheek. Natalie nodded in agreement and got in bed. She fell asleep nearly immediately. 

When Ben got out of the shower, he saw that his wife was sleeping soundly. She was acting not quite like herself and he didn't know what to make of it. Maybe she was just tired, but he was also worried about these headaches and nosebleeds. She wasn't sick again, but something was happening. Ben laid in bed behind his wife and wrapped his arms around her and fell asleep in minutes. 

The next day, things seemed to return to normal. Hux was able to find some other doctors for Natalie's delivery. Natalie didn't have issues with any of them so she and Ben were able to select someone they would both be comfortable with. 

They saw Dr. Christian Shaw the following day and Natalie was expectedly put on bed rest. They had been prepared for it so it wasn't a problem. After the appointment, Ben and Natalie returned to their quarters. "You feeling alright, Nat?"

"Just tired, baby. I'm sorry things have been tense lately."

"I can massage you if you want, Nat. Then you can go to sleep or not.," Ben said before he slowly kissed his wife.

"Or not. I missed you, baby.," Natalie said before she deepened the kiss and moved her hand over Ben's chest. "We can skip the massage and just move on to the or not."

Ben nipped and licked at Nat's neck as she moaned. They both moved to remove each other's clothes. Once they were undressed, Ben wasted no time in picking up his wife to have her mount him. Natalie maneuvered herself onto Ben's dick and they both shuddered. Ben and Natalie both moved to meet each other until they came fairly quickly. After a few more rounds, they fell asleep. 

As the months passed, Ben got used to Nat's sexual appetite needing to be addressed multiple times daily. He didn't mind it. As a matter of fact, he loved it. His sleep suffered a bit, but it made his wife happy. When Natalie made it to her 9th month, she was desperate to deliver as she was getting stir crazy. Her C-section was scheduled, but that didn't stop her from continuing to use Ben as her personal sex toy in hopes of inducing labor. She got her wish when Ben got her to the refresher after a sex session and a gush of fluid came out when she sat on the toilet. Ben got her to the hospital quickly and the nursing staff got her prepped for surgery. Ben left her to check on the kids and Leia to make sure they were ok. An IV was placed for any medications that would need to be given during the procedure. One of the nurses gave Natalie an injection she said would help relax her which at first seemed ok. After a minute, Natalie started feeling weird and Dr. Kestnor walked into her room. Natalie started to panic.

"Where's Dr. Shaw?"

"Dr. Shaw is indisposed, Natalie. I will be performing the procedure today."

"No, I don't want you! Get someone else!"

"There is no one else. Besides how will I get my hands on your children if I don't take them out myself."

"Who are you?"

"Don't you recognize me? You sensed something about me. That's why you refused to let me be your doctor. I admit your powers have grown quite a bit since we saw each other last, Natalie Solo."

"Snoke? I fucking killed you!"

"You killed my body, yes. I had already been making arrangements for my transfer. I had hoped the host would be your husband, but that was not to be. Once I get your children, I will have two of the most powerful Force users ever born that I can mold into what I wish."

"Ben will stop you!"

"No, he won't. He didn't even suspect a thing. He will let me cut your children from your womb and I'll walk away without issues. You'll never find them."

Natalie was on the verge of passing out. "What did you do to me?"

"I gave you a drug that will put you to sleep and paralyze you. No anesthetic properties though so you will feel every cut I make. I'll also be torturing you with horrifying visions. I tried to enter your mind, but it didn't work. It was a good thing that I left a remnant from the time I visited you when you had that seizure. That said, I'll give you the courtesy you gave me. Any last words?"

"You're a dead man. I will find you.," Natalie said before she passed out.

Ben walked into Natalie's room and saw that Nat was asleep. "Dr. Kestnor, what are you doing here? Where's Dr. Shaw?"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Solo. Dr. Shaw couldn't make it and I told him I would cover. I just came in to talk to your wife, but the nurses had already given her a sedative. I'm told her water has broken so time is of the essence. May I prepare for the surgery?"

Ben knew that Nat didn't like Kestnor, but she needed to deliver the babies. Kestnor was a leader in the field and Nat was sedated. "Ok, Dr. Kestnor. Take care of my wife please."

"Very good, Mr. Solo. The nurses will be in shortly to prep you and your wife for the surgery."

Ben couldn't wait to meet his newest children and he felt like everything was gonna be just fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have plans for a follow up to this. I have an outline, but it's not set just yet. No matter how much I write, I always seem to want or need to write more for these characters. I would LOVE to discuss this stuff with you guys!! Please feel free to comment!! If no one wants to comment on my work, we could discuss the TLJ!! P.S I hated it!!

**Author's Note:**

> Please be kind and open with your comments!!! Constructive criticism is appreciated!


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